Digitized by the Internet Archive in 2017 with funding from University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign Alternates https://archive.org/details/lilliputiannavyrOOpind Lilliputian Navy ! ! THE T’s FLEET OBj JOHN BULL AT THE SERPENTINE: % $oem, BY PETER PINDAR, Esq. Come, Johnny, do not stay to dine. Let’s hasten to the S - e ; Let thy attention there engage. The Wonder of this Wondrous Age ! The Fleet ! The Fleet! behold it there ! — Why, Johnny, pray what makes you stare ? u The Fleet Sir ?” Yes, Man, don’t you spy it ? It ts a Fleet, who dare deny it ? A Fleet, built on the newest Plan, By many a skilful Arlizan. Fit for— (nay, John, thy mouth pray shut,) Fit for the King of Lilliput ! ! FIFTH EDITION. Lonflon: Published by JOHN FAIRBURN, 2, Broadway, Ludgate-Hill. Price Eighteen-pence . <4 l rt 'y • f fj T W. Merchant, Printer, Ingram-court, Fenchurch-strect. ' ‘ ,y V vr> ■ ’ THE R Ts FLEET, 8$c. 8$c. 1 . COME rouse thee! rouse thee ! Johnny Bull ! Nor wait until the Park is full ; Come, haste and join the eager throng. Fast moving through the streets along ! 2 . Nay, do not scruple the expense, ‘Tis pleasure, John, that calls thee hence, Nor coldly calculate the use, That sums so lavish’d would produce, 3 . If given to cheer the vet' ran maim'd , In bold exploits of valour fam’d ; Or given to each aching breast. The vet' ran fall'n has left distress » 4 4 . What are glad hearts to staring eyes ? The soul’s calm pleasure to surprise? What’s charity, in various ways. To public pomp and holidays ? 5 . What, seamen who have faced grim slaughter. To little ships upon fresh water? What, tilling poor men’s empty pockets, To shows, balloons, and Congreve's rockets ? 6 . Would’st thou presume (unskiH’d in letters) To judge the actions of thy betters ? Would’st thou (the matter not to mince) Think thou art wiser than a P— -? 7 .- Oh ! no ; well knows his sapience r- 1, Thou never coulclst be so disloyal; He knows thy mouth (still gaping wide,) With novelty must be supplied; 8 . He knows thy ear still on the stretch, Each breath of rumour strange to catch ; Thy hands he knows great sights applaud And eke he knows thy back is broad* 5 9 . Expenses, heap’d with daily care, He knows it strong enough to bear ; For e’en to mountains swell the pack. Thy lusty sinews ne’er would crack. 10 . What though, when lords and ladies come. In splendour to a D g-R — m; Thy sons assembled in large masses, Will growl displeasure as he passes ; 11 . Let them but have — O cheap concession ! A sight of banquet or procession, A gala or illumination, Their anger’s sooth’d to approbation. 12 . Come, Johnny, do not stay to dine, Let’s hasten to the S el Let thy attention there engage, The wonder of this wond’rous age! 13 . The Fleet ! The Fleet ! behold it there ! — Why, Johnny, pray what makes you stare? “ The Fleet, sir?” Yes, man, don’t you spy it, It is a Fleet, who dare deny it ? 6 14 . A Fleet built on the newest plan, Ey many a skilful artizan, Fit for — (nay, John, thy mouth pray shut,) Fit for the King of Lilliput ! 15 . Let Nelson’s name no more be sounded. By deathless laurels though surrounded ; Let Howe and Duncan (sons of thunder) Never more excite our wonder ! 16 . St. Vincent hide thy fallen head, And mourn, alas ! thy glories fled ; But shout his fame, this fleet who plann’d, The first best toyman in the land ! 17 . Lament, lament, great Alexander, Prone in other climes to wander ! Prussia’s Monarch mourn thy fate, Denied a sight that came too late / 18 . Thou Bonaparte ! luckless wight ! Fast bound in Elba’s Isle so tight, Had’st thou been blest to see this day, Encircled with imperial sway, 7 19 . Tfiotfdst envy not our commerce vast, In human annals ne’er surpass’d, Deem colonies no more than chips : — Thou’dst only envy us our ships. 20 . Rejoice, for now thy name shall shine, Soft Naiad of the S ne, While meaner streams neglected lie, And weeping Thames his urn shall dry, 21 , No more, upon thy verdant banks. Shall wanton urchins’ early pranks Offend thee, e’er Sol’s ruddy beam Has shone upon thy silent stream ; 22 . No more shall they with bottoms bare, Unto thy chaste cold arms repair ; Nor smirch’d mechanic uare to lave His carcase in thy limpid wave. — 23 . No ; guarded by thy bum-proof fleet. The bold invaders thou can’st meet, And pour on each intrusive tail A broadside volley, thick as hail. 8 24 . ; Yes; thou superior now shalt; shine, While Ocean weeps in tears of brine ; I And crowds shall throng each grassy side C To view the honours of thy tide! 25 . There lords and ladies evry Sunday And coblers eke upon Saint Monday, Shall gazing own, with crests elate. Our country’s naval triumph great. 26 . No foot unhallow’d, Kens— n Thy gardens shall intrude upon ; Nor to thy stately palace near, Come sounds unfit for r— — 1 ear. 27 . No more, when leaves Autumnal fall, Shall schoolboys dare ascend thy wall. To strip thy trees with busy toil, And bear away the chestnut-spoil . 28 . Then Johnny sigh’d and shook his head ; And, in his gravest manner, said, 44 Is all this naval preparation 44 For little Boys’ intimidation? 9 29 . “ Must canncn in our ears be pealing “ Lest urchins come a chestnut stealing ? “ And Navies skim the narrow tide “ Lest there some blacksmith wash his hide ? 30 . “ O! useless gew-gaw! empty bubble! “ Waste of hands and waste of trouble ! “ O, waste of time! (cried John still louder) “ Waste of timber ! waste of powder! 31 . st I swear — Be still good John and listen, I see thine eyes with anger glisten ; I find thee still a headstrong elf, Resolv’d on thinking for thyself. 32 . Thy cudgel — (reason) ever wielding — Wilt never learn more courtly yielding? Nor thus oppose thy solid schemes To r 1 fancies, P- ly dreams ? 33 . Would thy investigating eye, Into a pal — e secrets pry And know what private reasons lurk. For this stupendous public work ? 10 34 . Still with thy plain, blunt yes or no, In one dull path thou’dst plodding go ; No double purpose fills thy head, By thee no more is meant than said. 35 . Faith John, thou yet hast much to learn, To understand each mazy turn, Within the politicians’ brain ; — But, come, this matter I’ll explain. 36 . You know we have within our city, Councils (true, not over witty,) Grave assemblies of debate, W ho meddle with affairs of state. 37 . Each great political event, Will this officious parliament, Canvass, nay, censure too, (od rot’em,) And sift state matters; to the bottom. 38 . They speeches make and their crude notions Hammer into shape of motions, And take addresses (saucy things) Unto the very ears of K gs. 11 39 . They minister’s attack at pleasure, Find fault with many a public measure, Call Com— n H — 11s and make a stir there ; But that’s not all, they go still further : — 40 . Suppose some Pers ge of State Should with a P ss link his fate, Who gives him (nine months past and gone) A Lovely Heiress to his T e. 41 . Forbid, dear John, that you or I, With hand prophane, should ever try To draw aside the veil that lies ’Twixt us and Hymen's mysteries . 42 . No farther will we seek to go Than outward circumstances shew— Enough for us that they were mated, And shortly after separated. 43 . How folks should act when so divided, I have not clearly heard decided ; But on such topics oft we see Opinions widely disagree. c UNIVERSITY OF ILLINOIS LIBRARY 12 44 . Some think a nunnery’s seclusion, Secure from any male intrusion, Is fitting most the female’s lot, Who singly wears the married knot, 45 . While unrestrain’d the lordly spouse In ev’ry pleasure shall carouse, And choose for absent wife a Proxy, Where’er he finds a fav’rite doxy ; 46 While others think (and, ’tis most true, I am inclin’d to think so too,) The lovely bride of blood m — j — c. Shut from society domestic, 47 . May shine at balls, at routs, and plays,* May share the pomp of public days. And, without criminal inducement, Indulge in every gay amusement. 48 . But slander, Johnny’s never slow, At any dirty work we know, And none than female unprotected A readier victim is selected. 13 49 . Yes ; imps of malice still we find In high life, as in low inclin’d, With tales of scandal fain to joggle us. Like Sir J and L — y D s. 50 . But people of discreeter morals Should meddle not with wedded quarrels This, prudence says to all, and certes , So once said Sir W -m C— s ; 51 . Who, in such squabble interposing, Lucklessly would thrust his Nose in, Which got so tweak’d that life’s duration Will not allay its inflammation. 52 . But these same pert and prating sinners, So fond of speeches and of dinners, Would to this rule objection take, And certain nice distinctions make. 53 . They said a P ss, tho’ deserted, By calumny should not be dirtied ; Nay, deem’d her character to be A kind of public property. 14 54 . And if beset with venal spies, With minions ’gend’ring basest lies, Exposed to dark examinations. Fixing unknown imputations, 55 . Her sole legitimate Protector, At such a crisis should neglect her, They ev’ry energy would rouse. And hand and heart her cause espouses 56 . This purpose fully bent upon. They took a trip to Kens n And more to give their errand grace. They took the M— — r, with sword and mace. 57 . But he who led the grand array, Along St* Giles's chose the way, And made their choler very high burn. To find themselves turn'd off at Tyburn . 58 . Yet through the park in proud procession, With many a dutiful profession, They went to clear from imputation, The victim of foul accusation. 15 59 . Yes, this they did, (a saucy train !) But will they dare do so again , When such a potent armament , Commands the way which erst they went? 60 . No, no, ye Waith* — —ns and ye W — —*ds, You must restrain your peevish moods — Learn female wrongs to treat like stoics Nor deal so largely in heroics! 61 . The Houses with addresses cram, Of Car n, or of Bit — m, — To those you shall pass unmolested : — • Nay, e’en with knighthood be invested ; 62 . But come not here with plaintive ditty, Of tender feeling, or of pity, To solace a neglected bride, Or your presumption we will chide! 63 . If here again, you make approaches, We’ll batter, faith! your gilded coaches ! But come within our Cannons level, We’ll blow you to the very d -1 ! 16 64 . But who shall speak thy wondrous praise, Thou miracle of these our days ! Thou finish’d leader of the ton, Whom every eye is fix’d upon ! 65 . Thou patron of politer arts — The every soul that life imparts, To stay makers and wig contrivers, Tailors and professions divers ! 66 . Thou jolly full grown god of love, Who, vulgar prejudice above, Deem’st marriage bands but links of feather, Binding only fools together, 67 . And quite impotent to confine, P ly souls when they incline To leave their own wives, or repair To kiss some other wedded fair. 68 . Thou star of elegance and fashion ! Thou pink of all that’s gay and dashing ! Graceful em-bon-point Adonis ! P — — e of modern macaronies ! 1 / 69 . Long thou’st been the admiration, Of a wise and thinking nation ! Oft thou hast surprised us truly, Time past gone as well as newly ; 70 . But this last grand thought astounds us- Yes its brilliancy confounds us — All thy former prodigies, The world must own were fools to this. 71 . What though to our satisfaction, Prov’d thou hast, there’s more attraction In old wrinkled age and pimples* Than in youthful smiles and dimples ? 72 . What though on recent glad occasions. Grand were thy illuminations — Cannon fir’d too from thy wall — Yet thy fleet surpasses all ! 73 . What were gold and silver fshes, Swimming ’mong the plates and dishes; (Menaced oft with streams of gravy) To this MATCHLESS LITTLE NAVY? 18 74 . Raise your grateful voices loud ! Britons sure may well be proud, When the Ru — r of the nation Shews such skill in navigation ! 75 . Though no laurell’d Alexander, He, a nautical commander, In historic page shall shine, Adm’ral of the S ! ! ! 76 . May he till the age of Noah, Float in streams of Curafoa l May his vigour ne’er grow rusty ! May no Venus old and fusty, 77 . (Driving him to desperation,) Frown upon his ardent passion ! May his dancing ne’er again Be interrupted by a sprain! 78 . Advancing now, with low’ring mien, A cloud in the horizon seen, Spreads o’er bright sol it’s dusky power, 3>escending quickly in a shower! 19 79 . A mist of darkness most profound, Involves the standers-by around, Who, drench’d with rain, their fate are cursing, When speedily the cloud dispersing, 80 Phoebus, with a gladdening ray, Pours again the flood of day, And, lo ! beneath his aspect bright, Old Neptune’s self appears in sight ! 81 . Not as some artists, dull and stupid, Who of him know no more than Cupid, Have painted him with triple prong , And by sea-horses drawn along : — 82 . A naval uniform he wore, And seem’d an ancient commodore ; Thin locks of grey, an added grace Gave to his weather-beaten face. 83 . No car proclaim’d the ocean’s God— Upon a cask of rum he rode, And, in his hand, a yard of clay* Was all that mark’d his sceptred sway. * A tobacco-pipe, D 20 84 . Of tritons , with their shells, not one, His godship did attend upon ; Bat all their places, well supplied A rough old boatswain, at his side ; — 85 . Obedient to his master’s will. His grog he’d make, his pipe he’d fill ; Right blunt and honest were his tones, — They whisper’d he was Davy Jones . 86 . Quite fill’d with wonder and surprise. The crowd shrunk back with staring eyes — “ Avast !” the god said, “ don’t you know me? “ Do you forget how much you owe me? 87 . “ What makes you stare so? I am Neptune, “ All last war so well who kept tune, “ In engagements hot and many, “ To your song of Rule Britanny . 88 . “ Mayhap that now 7 the war is o’er, “ Of Neptune you may think no more; “ Of him, who always stood your friend; “ Of him, who did your isle defend. 21 89. “ When Boney with great preparation, “ Talk’d so much about invasion ; — “ He wanted islands— now he’s got one , — “ This he would have found a hot one. 90. “ Tvvas I, — but where's the man will doubt it? “ Zounds ! I scorn to prate about it — “ What are you met here to see ? “ I’m sure you never thought of me. 9 L. “ Yon fleet °f cock-boats f — I perceive it 44 Englishmen ? — I can’t believe it— 44 Go get you home, and cry for shame, 44 That here in search of ships you came. 92. “ Of Nelson did you never hear? “ Confound it, now my eyes feel queer!” A tear roll’d down his cheek so rough, Across his face he drew his cuff! 93. 44 What ships were, he knew, — heaven bless him! 44 Sad day ! when grim death came topresshim; “ Yet I’m glad ’twas so, in one sense ; “ For had he liv’d to see this nonsense, 22 94 . u He would have been asham’d of fighting “ For people who could take delight in, 44 Such a Navy as that there ; — 44 d — n me ! but it makes me swear ! 95 . “ * England expects ,’ — but what’s expected, “ With a fleet like this erected ? 44 If edry man his duty did, “ He would (aye without being bid,) 96 . 44 A rope’s-end lay on, without sparing, 44 Ev’ry one who had a share in 44 Building this same piece of folly — 44 The sight on’t makes me melancholy. 97 . 44 But as for him that order’d it, 44 I’ll mince the matter not a bit : — 46 I don ! t care whatsomde'er you call him, 44 If I had him, I’d keel-haul him. 98 . 44 You’ll say he never was at sea, 44 But that don’t argufy with me — 44 Whate’er the foolish or the wise say. Sink the stupid lubber I say ! u 23 99 . (i What, John Bull! Yo ho, my hearty! “ Send these here ships to Bonyparty , “ To play with in the isle of Elby — “ Generous you may as well be. 100 . “ Mark what I say, John, and obey me — - “ If such tricks again they play me, “ By the ocean they shall rue it ! — “ England's mine — I’ve long stuck to it 101 . ' ■ r ?) .fcj hull ’* * t ?;. . ■' * * W0.| OJ p il>»* ylwi *3*J ol S'liiiJ.lteTyzti'*!* W-i ^ 4> " f ,,I