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 LI B RARY 
 
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 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 VOL. I.
 
 MELCHIOK GOELES. 
 
 OE MODERN MESMEEISM. 
 
 BY 
 
 HENRY AITCHENBIE. 
 
 IN THEEE VOLUMES. 
 VOL. I. 
 
 LONDON: 
 JOHN CAMDEN HOTTEN, PICCADILLY. 
 
 1867. 
 
 [All righit re$erved.J
 
 
 CONTENTS 
 
 OP 
 
 THE FIRST VOLUME. 
 
 ( 
 
 n 
 
 CHAP, PAGE 
 
 I. FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS FOR ONE GUINEA . . 1 
 
 II. INFLUENCES 19 
 
 III. ETON REMINISCENCES 31 
 
 ""-; IV. QUID QUID ID EST TIMED DANAOS ET DONA 
 
 J-' FERENTES 39 
 
 V. UNEXPECTED RECOGNITIONS 56 
 
 "^ VI. SIC TRANSIT GLORIA MUNDI 66 
 
 »-VII. "SHOULD OLD ACQUAINTANCE BE FORGOT?" . 80 
 
 VIII. CONFIDENTIAL COMMUNICATIONS 91 
 
 IX. TOO GOOD TO LAST LONG 99 
 
 X. HAPPY DAYS AT DRESDEN 107 
 
 XI. SUNSET FROM THE WOLFSHUGEL Ill 
 
 XII. OUT OF TIME ALTOGETHER 118 
 
 XIII. INGENUI VULTUS PUER, INGENUI QUE PUDORIS 123 
 
 XIV. MASTER FERDY's EXPERIENCES 132 
 
 XV. COLONEL DE LORME FORBIDS HIS NEPHEW HIS : 
 
 HOUSE 154
 
 Ti CONTENTS. 
 
 CHAP. FAGB 
 
 XVI. TARAXACUM 170 
 
 XVII. DE LYONS AND HIS SCIENTIFIC FRIENDS . 180 
 
 XVIII. WOE TO THE HOUSE OF DE LORME . . . 195 
 
 XIX. RUMPLE STILSKINS' SERVICES ARE REQUIRED 207 
 
 XX. FRANK LAMBARD TO THE RESCUE . . . 215 
 
 XXL THE REVIVAL 222 
 
 XXIL NOTICE OF REMOVAL 235 
 
 XXIII. TO LET — A FIRST FLOOR IN LUTTICHAU 
 
 STRASSE 242 
 
 XXIV. A GRAVE ORDER ENDS IN GRAVER CONSE- 
 
 QUENCES 250 
 
 XXV. TROUBLES NEVER COME ALONE .... 258 
 
 XXVI. CI VIS ROM ANUS SUM 268 
 
 XXVII. A FRIEND IN NEED NOT ALWAYS APPRE- 
 CIATED 279 
 
 XXVIII. A MORNING CALL RETURNED 289 
 
 XXIX. MORE THINGS THAN ARE DREAMT OF IN 
 
 PHILOSOPHY 297
 
 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER I. 
 
 FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS FOR ONE GUINEA. 
 
 It was on the Derby-day, I remember — the Derby-day 
 
 of the year . Upon my word I cannot undertake 
 
 to say what year to a certainty ; although anybody 
 of the most moderate pretensions to any knowledge 
 or interest in sporting matters may within the next 
 dozen pages or &o, if he will only take the trouble 
 to get on so far, find himself able to settle this im- 
 portant point without the least doubt or hesitation, 
 though perhaps not altogether without some feeling 
 of pity and contempt for me as an ignorant and 
 simple individual. I am not a sporting character 
 myself — I have never pretended to be so. 
 
 I am fully aware of my own deficiencies in this 
 respect, and must humbly confess that it is with a 
 sort of feeling of being out of my proper place, and 
 as though I were almost guilty of a liberty and an 
 intrusion whenever I do venture to go down to Epsom, 
 and to try for a chance of seeing something of the 
 
 VOL. I. B
 
 2 ^ELCEIOR GORLES. 
 
 great race of the year, from as good a place as I can 
 manage to squeeze myself into in the Grand Stand 
 on the Derhy-day. 
 
 Where in the whole world is to be found such 
 another gathering together of the people ? — where 
 every one is sure to meet with every one else whom 
 he has ever known, seen, or heard of. 
 
 Old friends and new, of all ranks of life, of all 
 ages, and all degrees of acquaintance, collected from 
 all parts of the three kingdoms — from all ends of the 
 world, indeed, for that matter — recalling and renewing 
 how many old associations, scenes, and recollections 
 of every place one has been in, of every past year of 
 one's life ! 
 
 Here I have been on one side jammed by a sudden 
 rush through the door against a noble duke, who, to 
 my confusion, courteously apologises for temporarily 
 inconveniencing the " funny-bone" of my elbow with 
 his august ribs : the next minute I am pressed flat, 
 like one of the biffins of his own native county, 
 asrainst the broad waistcoat of honest old Tom Kor- 
 deroy, the jolly Norfolk farmer, who, years ago, used 
 to give me such capital partridge shooting when I 
 was at a private tutor's down in those parts. Now, 
 again, I cannot help trampling on the very heels of 
 little Chizzler, with whom I have been " dead cuts"
 
 £500 FOR £1 Is. Qd. 3 
 
 ever since I was compelled by a sense of public duty to 
 convict him of mal-practices at vinrjt-et-un, at the 
 chambers of a mutual friend in the Temple. 
 
 And there, hang him ! pressing close upon me in the 
 rear is another unpleasant acquaintance in the person 
 of Mr. Buckram, my tailor, who, if every one were to 
 strictly insist upon claiming his own property, might 
 even deprive me of the coat and et ceteras in whicli I 
 am at this moment standing. 
 
 His present splendid appearance of a sporting gen- 
 tleman at large, hardly, I think, agrees with the touch- 
 ing appeal for a remittance received through the post 
 from that worthy himself, only this very morning as I 
 was starting from home ; in which he alludes so feel- 
 ingly to importunate creditors of his own, and engage- 
 ments which must be met within twenty-four hours. 
 
 And so all around, without enumerating more 
 examples of the same kind, one sees closely packed 
 on all sides men one meets with everywhere every 
 day — men one never by any chance meets anywhere 
 else — men one has not seen for years — men one 
 thought, and had every reason to believe, had died 
 long ago in India or New Zealand. What a strange 
 scene of jumble and crush and a regular pandemonium 
 of excitement there is ! At every successive recur- 
 rence of the day, how you are invariably told the same 
 
 B 2
 
 i MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 tiling by every one you run against in the same 
 excited tone, that there will be, that there must be, 
 that there are, twenty, thirty, fifty thousand more 
 people come down this time than have ever been known 
 before upon the course. 
 
 And according to the usual custom of public regula- 
 tions of any sort in this happy and free country, because 
 in each succeeding year the numbers requiring to be 
 accommodated increase, so of course it stands to reason 
 that the space and accommodation, either by the en- 
 croachment of private boxes, or by cutting off half the 
 lawn, or shutting off the best part of the balconies, or 
 some other monopolizing alteration, is by an inverse 
 proportion decreased ; so that those who, like my 
 humble self, are not amongst the initiated, or, as I have 
 already confessed, do not feel quite at home in the 
 midst of the crowd and turmoil, find themselves each 
 year (literally as well as metaphorically speaking) rather 
 more and more " shoved to the ivall." 
 
 But there, there, do we not all go down to the 
 Derby to enjoy ourselves, and not to grumble ? So 
 let us make the best of circumstances, and feel as we 
 ought, happy and pleased with everything. 
 
 Such, or something very like them, were the 
 thoughts passing through ray mind as, not having 
 been able to make my way further than just through
 
 £500 FOR £1 Is. U. 5 
 
 the passage leading from the staircase to the front of 
 the Grand Stand, I found myself gradually squeezed 
 closer and closer against the iron rails which divide 
 •what is left of the Lawn from that portion more ex- 
 clusively devoted to the betting-ring. 
 
 I might have felt contented with my place, or at 
 any rate resigned, had it not been for the propinquity 
 of a most excitable and purple-nosed individual, who 
 just at the other side of the railings seemed to take 
 a malignant joy in bellowing into my very ears ; so 
 that besides the vibration of the interior arrangement 
 of those organs from his stentorian tones, which were 
 like the shrill notes of a cracked bassoon, I could 
 actually feel my hair playing in the hot breezes of 
 the wretch's poisonous breath, as louder and louder 
 he poured forth the most reckless offers in regard to 
 " laying any amount of odds, against any amount of 
 horses," which I, his next neighbour, or I suppose 
 any other individual of the thousands within ear-shot 
 might feel inclined to name, "Bar one." In that 
 hideous war-cry or refrain of "Ban-r-r one " did he 
 seem more specially to take delight, yelling it out as I 
 have said with ever-increasing vehemence, frequently 
 even without the foregoing, and as I in my innocence 
 should have thought, if for intelligibility only, necessary 
 context.
 
 6 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 Any chance of moving away seemed hopeless, 
 willingly as I would have taken even an inferior 
 position for seeing the forthcoming event, for we were 
 literally packed like figs in a barrel, tlie broiling sun 
 pouring down full upon our heads, and this horrible 
 "Barr-r-r one" becoming more and more insufferable; 
 when feeling a specially hard dig in the back with the 
 point of a big stick, so specially pointed indeed as to be 
 evidently intentional and denoting friendly recognition 
 or even intimacy, and turning round, as well as under 
 the circumstances I could manage any such movement, 
 I to mv great delight beheld — surelv — uiv old friend 
 and schoolfellow, Frank Lambard, nodding his head 
 and grinning at me in my evident distress. 
 
 One moment's pause of consideration, scarcely 
 amounting to doubt as to his identity, — though the 
 dear old fellow's cheery face was disguised with a more 
 than ordinary abundance of moustache and beard, 
 and what was still to be seen of his once clear com- 
 plexion was now tanned dark as mahogany, there 
 was no mistaking those sparkling eyes, and that 
 rattling, hearty laugh — Frank Lambard himself, whom 
 I had not seen, or even heard of, for years. 
 
 Here was an example apropos to my late reflections. 
 To what feelings and memories did that recognition 
 immediately give rise in my mind's eye ! Lambard,
 
 £500 FOR £1 Is. Qd. .7 
 
 certainly, as the saying goes, is no chicken. Six feet 
 one in his stockings, and broadly built in proportion. 
 His name, even after this lapse of time, still ranks 
 high amongst the demi-gods of dear old Eton. For 
 two years captain of the eight, and nearly equally 
 famous for his swiping in the playing fields : do they 
 not still talk of his great fight on the Brocas with 
 Jem Badger, the boat-cad? — still point out the solid 
 oak panel in the upper school through which he 
 smashed his fist, and the iron window-bar, in the 
 chapel staircase, twisted round, as you may see it 
 even to this day, by the strong gripe of Badger Lam- 
 bard's mighty fingers ? 
 
 For after that famous Brocas fight, as in the old 
 days of chivalry the victors were accustomed to 
 assume the honours and devices of those who had 
 fallen before their, prowess, even so had Frank Lam- 
 bard's applauding peers and contemporaries conferred 
 on their hero the style and title of his discomfited 
 antagonist. 
 
 Even now — and more years than I begin to care 
 to reckon have sped by since that day — looking 
 back, as I see him in my memory, after the fight was 
 over, examining his own eye-tooth — picked up and 
 returned to him by an obsequious little courtier of a 
 fourth-form boy — and in vain trying to fit it back into
 
 8 MELCHIOR GOFiLES. 
 
 its place : then flinging a sovereign (the only one he 
 had) to the defeated cad, with an admonition to " get 
 home, and learn not to interfere with a gentleman an- 
 other time" — I could even now, I say, shout and 
 cheer again, as we all shouted for and. cheered, him 
 then till we were hoarse. 
 
 I could cry, as I should almost like to have cried 
 at the time, then and there, but was obliged to re- 
 frain, as having only just got into the fifth form — a 
 position in life in which any such exhibition of ex- 
 cited feelings was of course entirely out of the 
 question. 
 
 But to return after this digression, for which I 
 must apologise, but positively could not help, when 
 that scene recurred to my vivid recollection — could 
 I possibly have been more fortunate than just at that 
 time to have thus encountered, or rather to have been 
 discovered as I was in that crowd by my friend Lam- 
 bard, of all meu in the world ? 
 
 " Come here out of that, ' Little one !' " he cried (I 
 have not, I think, mentioned that I am myself rather 
 under than above the average height : I was always, 
 I might say, small of my age when a boy). 
 
 " Come out of that awfully bad place you are in 
 there ; stick to me, and I will see if I cannot manage 
 to bring you down to the front, to see the great
 
 £500 FOR £1 Is. OtZ. 9 
 
 event." And seizing me by the arm, in a grasp like 
 a vice, Lambard proceeded deliberately to work his 
 way through the densely-packed crowd, partly by sheer 
 weight, though no violence, and partly by persuasion, 
 for he seemed to have a word and a joke ready for 
 every one, whether he knew them or not. 
 
 We thus found ourselves, really to my astonishment, 
 in no time close down to the front railings, in as good 
 a place for seeing as if we had had the first choice of 
 the whole enclosure, and had been there, like some of 
 the more prudent, since the earliest moment of admis- 
 sion in the morning. 
 
 "Now here we are, you see, and here we will 
 abide," said my friend and leader, as I may well call 
 him ; "though you may come here and stand in front 
 
 of me," gently handing forward a stoutish and short 
 old gentleman, who was just commencing a remon- 
 strance at this unlooked-for intrusiou between himself 
 and the course ; " and what is more, sir, you will have 
 no need to take off your hat, unless you prefer a 
 coup-de-soleil, which would probably be your fate — 
 and a great pity, too, because you seem such a nice 
 little round gentleman, and I can see perfectly well 
 over you, and your hat and all into the bargain." 
 
 The little old gentleman thus benignly addressed 
 was growing very red in the face, and though he took
 
 10 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 the place ofifered to him, seemed inclined to express 
 some sort of resentment or at least indignation at the 
 familiarity; hut Lambard, taking no further notice of 
 him, was addressing himself to me again as " Little 
 one," which from anv one else I should certainly not 
 have been inclined to allow, but well knew that upon 
 him all remonstrance or expostulation on the subject 
 would be utterly thrown away. 
 
 " What special interest have you in the Derby, 
 my dear 'Little one?' he inquired. "Come now, 
 what will you give me for the ticket I have drawn 
 in my club lottery? — a real genuine live horse, 
 and an actual starter, too, I am told, though the 
 odds are at something like sixty to one against him. 
 You know nothing about the horses, you say ? — no 
 more d(i I, my dear fellow. I have been away so 
 long, and entirely out of the whole sort of thing, that 
 until three days ago I do not think I had even heard 
 the names of half-a-dozen of the favourites, and those 
 only from what I picked up in the smoking-room of 
 my club. I myself have long ago (luckily, I so far 
 really believe,) established the firmest faith in my own 
 special bad luck. So constant and invariable has mine 
 always been, that no horse in which I was even remotely 
 interested could by any possible chance hope to win. 
 Indeed, I verily believe that were I even to back
 
 £500 FOR £1 Is. Od. 11 
 
 them all, or to bet that one of the thirty starters must 
 come in first to the winning post, they would some- 
 how or other all contrive to break down, or else all 
 thirty come in together in a dead heat. It is only a 
 wonder to me that I should have drawn any horse at 
 all — an actual live one, that is, whose name is on the 
 correct card, as a positive starter : but as I do not 
 happen to have any sort of ill-feeling against the 
 owner of that noble quadruped, whoever he may be, 
 and as, I say, I am morally certain that if I can 
 possibly gain anything by it he has not the vaguest 
 chance of winning, partly moved by that truly ge- 
 nerous and disinterested sentiment, and partly in con- 
 sideration of my happiness in having thus fallen in 
 with you, my dear ' Little one,' who are such an old 
 and valued friend of days gone by, I will now offer 
 that said ticket to you, to have and to hold for your 
 own sole and special benefit, with all its advantages and 
 chances of gaining the grand prize of no less than 
 five hundred pounds, for that is the princely sum 
 total to which the winner will be entitled, all for one 
 guinea ; by which transaction, besides the self-reward 
 of performing a good deed in thus removing my 
 spell of bad luck from, I have no doubt, a well- 
 trained and well-deserving animal, I shall at the 
 same time honestly realize a whole shilling sterling
 
 12 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 by the Derby. It cost me one pound ; and you shall have 
 it, I tell you, for one pound one. So hereyou are, five 
 hundred pounds actually going for one guinea only. 
 Any advance on one guinea? for one pound one 
 shilling only, is now offered this alarming sacrifice : 
 going— going— ■' 
 
 "Done !" screamed a shrill pipe of a voice suddenly 
 from behind. " I will give you a guinea for it." 
 
 Lambard was leaning with his arm on my shoulder 
 while thus rattling on in his noisy way, and in an 
 instant I distinctly felt a shock exactly like that of a 
 powerful electric retort, catch him up as it were with 
 a sharp and sudden check. 
 
 Turning round as I did instantly to look up into 
 his face, to my surprise, I saw that his colour had 
 changed to a ghastly paleness ; and his eyes were 
 fixed with the wild expression of a frightened horse 
 upon a very small, strange-looking individual, who 
 was working up towards us, literally in between the 
 legs and coat skirts of the half-dozen people who 
 were immediately around us. 
 
 Taking into account a disproportionately tall hat, 
 and very extra high heels to his boots, the stranger 
 thus approaching us could not have measured much 
 more than four feet six orseven inches in height; but
 
 £500 FOR £1 Is. OcL 13 
 
 though no doubt a dwarf, his head and limbs seemed 
 all in proportion, and symmetrically formed. 
 
 His features were common-place enough, though 
 in the hasty glance I had at him, even in the astonish- 
 ment of the moment I was struck with the extraor- 
 dinary sly and malicious expression in his narrow 
 little slits of eyes ; and there was a most repulsively 
 sarcastic grin about the sides of his mouth, as he 
 made his way close up to us, half hesitatingly, and 
 then as though pretending after a moment's doubt 
 positively to recognise my friend, with — 
 
 " Ah ! is it you really then, Lambard ? It is so 
 long since we have met, that I did not know you at 
 first, though I thought I recognised the voice. I will 
 take that ticket off your hands, since your friend here — 
 Mr. Littleton, did you say ?" — with a half bow and a 
 grin towardsmyself (confoundhisimpudencel) — "does 
 not seem to accept your handsome offer. You ought 
 to give me the next refusal, you know, for I have be- 
 come a near relation of yours since we last met. Bless 
 me, how long it seems ! A guinea you said, I think, 
 didn't you? Thank you. If it should turn out to be 
 the winner, it would have been a pity to have let the 
 chance go out of the family, you know, ha ! ha !" 
 
 I feel that I cannot attempt to convey the look and
 
 14 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 manner of triumphant malignity with which these few 
 sentences were squeaked out by this remarkable little 
 party in the shrill tones of a cracked pitch pipe. 
 
 I again looked round to see what answer Lambard, 
 who had just before been in such boisterous spirits, 
 and so full of fun and chafif, would have ready for this 
 impertinent fellow. To my great amazement, he 
 seemed utterly spell-bound, with his eyes still staring 
 fixedly, and an expression, not of amusement or even 
 perhaps of scornful contempt which I might have 
 expected, but of actual terror on his face. He made 
 no attempt at any reply, but holding out the ticket 
 which he had just before been waving about in his 
 hand, exchanged it for the proffered coin without 
 seeming to know what he was about ; and then as if 
 with a very strong effort over himself — 
 
 "For heaven's sake, my dear fellow, help me to 
 get out of this," he said, in a deep hoarse whisper : 
 "let us get away from here — anywhere." 
 
 And in the next moment, with a violent rush, he 
 was pulling me along by the arm through the closely- 
 packed crowd, with tenfold the impetuosity with 
 which we had so lately before made our way down to 
 the front of the enclosure. 
 
 "Who is he? what is the matter with you, my 
 good friend ?" I gasped out, as we arrived almost
 
 £500 FOR £1 Is. M. 15 
 
 breathless with the frightful exertion of fighting our 
 way through that dense mass of obstructive humanity ; 
 and then for the first time the thought which struck 
 me, as not the least odd part of the affair was, that the 
 strange little man should have been so anxious to 
 buy that ticket without knowing or having even 
 asked what horse's name was upon it. 
 
 Lambard had certainly never proclaimed it. I was 
 in the very act of asking him ; for at the place to 
 which we had then struggled, in the door-way leading 
 through into the interior of the stand, further pro- 
 gress was absolutely impossible. 
 
 " What horse was it, by the way, you thus parted 
 with ?" I was, I say, in the very act of inquiring, when 
 arose the loud cry of, "They're off! they're off!" 
 "Hats off in front there, if you please. Hats off. 
 Down there in front — get down." 
 
 A spasmodic movement runs through the whole 
 dense mass, as every one of which it is composed 
 makes a last simultaneous effort to better his chance 
 of seeing. " Every man for himself," is felt by each 
 separate individual ; and then in another moment the 
 whole of that vast multitude of thousands of human 
 beings are held together in one strong, common feeling 
 of intense interest and excitement. 
 
 A distant murmur from the further corner of the
 
 16 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 course comes rolling on, and gathering force like a 
 huge wave of the sea, as it draws nearer and nearer, 
 and then bursts into a gigantic roar, as the many- 
 coloured phalanx, brilliant in the sun, flashes by like 
 a meteor. There is a momentary lull of breathless 
 expectation, and then a roar ten thousand times 
 louder than before proclaims that Number 16 has 
 been run up at the signal-post; and the name of the 
 fortunate winner (perhaps, as in the instance I speak 
 of,) hitherto comparatively unknown, is now repeated 
 by ten times ten thousand mouths, all talking and 
 holloaing at once ; and before another hour has 
 passed will be known, and again and again repeated, 
 in every quarter of the United Kingdom. 
 
 " You were asking the name of the horse which was 
 on that ticket, were you not ?" said Lambard, in a 
 hard and unnatural voice, through his tightly-clenched 
 teeth. " You may hear them shouting it." 
 
 " Caractacus ?" 
 
 " Yes, that was it. He was, I believe, considered 
 to be a hopeless outsider ; but the moment I made it 
 over to that fellow, I felt a conviction that that horse 
 would win." 
 
 Then, with a fierce burst of execration, he turned, 
 and rushed away through the building, and out of 
 the doorway on the other side.
 
 £500 FOR £\ Is. OcZ. 17 
 
 I hardly knew why I felt so strongly impelled to 
 follow liim as I did. It was ridiculous to suppose 
 that I could be of any help or protection to a great 
 fellow like him., who was twice my own size, even if I 
 had had time to reflect that there could possibly have 
 been a need of anything of the sort. If my motive 
 ■was only a latent curiosity, or say interest, in the 
 curious rencontre and scene which I had thus chanced 
 to witness, I was not at the time conscious of any 
 such feeling. 
 
 Eut, heedless of the doorkeeper's friendly warning 
 of having passed out without having taken a return- 
 ticket, I ran out after my excited friend, who was 
 striding away straight down the side of the hill at the 
 rate of twenty miles an hour. 
 
 He seemed surprised when, puffing and blowing as 
 I was, I managed to brmg myself sufficiently within 
 ear-shot to shoat to him to stop. 
 
 Again I noticed that same expression of wild fear 
 pass over his face, as he turned round to see who was 
 in pursuit of him ; but there was something of relief 
 and satisfaction in his voice, as he said — 
 
 "Oh I ifs you, is it. Little one? Why, what on 
 earth do you want, or mean, by running after me in 
 this manner?" 
 
 I told him that it was so long since we had met, 
 VOL. I. c
 
 18 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 that I did _not want to lose sight of him directly 
 again; hut that if he hked I would walk with him, 
 as I did not care to go hack to the Stand, not to 
 speak of having forfeited my right of re-entry. 
 
 " Are you man enough to walk across to King- 
 ston ?" he asked. " We shall get hack to town more 
 quietly that way, without the chance of again meeting 
 — anybody," he added, after a pause, " whom one does 
 not care to meet. It is seven or eight miles across, 
 and perhaps you may find the sun too warm." 
 
 It was, indeed, a piping hot day in June, and the 
 road would be, I knew, over our very boots in dust ; 
 but the tone of doubt in which Lambard spoke, de- 
 cided me. So only stipulating that he should slightly 
 moderate the tremendous pace at which he had 
 started, we stepped out without another word.
 
 19 
 
 CHAPTER 11. 
 
 INFLUENCES. 
 
 Lambard still for some time seemed to be brooding 
 over the rencontre which had evidently so thoroughly- 
 upset him. For at least a mile and a half ^Ye trudged 
 on, side by side, in profound silence. From time to 
 time I noticed that he knit his brows, and clutched 
 his stout oak stick in a tighter grasp, as though his 
 thoughts were stern ones ; when, quite suddenly, he 
 pulled up, to ask me if I had ever heard of or be- 
 lieved at all in " Influences ?" 
 
 " What do you mean ?" I asked. " What sort of 
 influences ? I certainly should not have been in- 
 fluenced by you to have started on this frightfully 
 hot and dusty walk of eight miles, if I had thought 
 you were going thus to shut up and trudge on with- 
 out exchanging a single word with an old friend, 
 whom you have not met for so long." 
 
 To that remark of mine he only vouchsafed a laugh, 
 something more like his own usual hearty manner; 
 
 c 2
 
 20 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 and then, as if dissatisfied with himself for thus re- 
 lenting, assumed a darker aspect even than before, 
 and we plodded on for another quarter of an hour in 
 the same grim silence ; then, just as suddenly as before, 
 he seemed determined to shake off his dark mood; 
 thanked me warmly for the friendly feeling I had 
 shown in coming so far with him, and without further 
 preface began there and then a full explanation of 
 what he meant by " Influences." 
 
 " Influences," he repeated again, solemnly, " such 
 as those which, as sure as I am here walking by your 
 side, were exerted over me by that loathsome little 
 wretch to whom you saw me, in spite of myself, com- 
 pelled to hand over that ticket — (though I feel even 
 now that if I had kept it, the five hundred odd which 
 it has gained, and of which, under existing circum- 
 stances, I should just DOW have been most specially 
 glad, would never have come to me, so I put that out 
 of the question, for the horse would not have won) — 
 but whether by the influence of our stars or of our nati- 
 vities coinciding, or rather clashing, or some of the 
 spiritualist-mesmeric contrivances, I cannot say ; but 
 all I know for a fact is, that somehow or another that 
 little toad'' — (he seemed to find a difi'erent epithet to 
 apply to his enemy every time it became necessary to 
 recur to him) — "that little toad exercises a most un-
 
 INFLUENCES. 21 
 
 accountable and irresistible influence and control over 
 me and my actions. 
 
 "You may smile," be went on, bitterly; "but tbough 
 I can in no way explain or even describe it, I bave 
 myself as little doubt of tbe fact, as tbat I bave a 
 soul to be saved. Avoiding — flying from tbat fellow, 
 as I bave always done — be bas turned up against me 
 continually ; and tbougb accidental as our meetings 
 at all sorts of times and places bave often seemed to 
 be, I bave invariably bad immediate reason to regret 
 and abbor tbe very sigbt of bim ; and altbougb, as 
 witnessed by yourself to-day, I could not actually 
 prove any premeditated evil in tbis instance, yet I 
 believe bim to be, and instinctively sbrink from 
 bim, as malicious and wicked a little monster as ever 
 trod tbis eartb. 
 
 " His name, you ask ? His name is Gorles /" Lam- 
 bard quite yelled in answer to my simple and very 
 natural inquiry. And tben tbere rusbed fortb a volley 
 of ugly words and sentiments, in a tone wbicb caused 
 a poor busbandman to start witb astonisbment, just as 
 be bad put bis bead over tbe bedge to respectfully ask 
 if be could tell bim wbat horse bad won tbe Derby. 
 
 Blank dismay was depicted on tbat bonest rustless 
 countenance as, civilly toucbing bis forelock, be re- 
 plied, " Ob, Gorles, was it ? Tbank'ye, gentleman.
 
 22 MELCHIOR OORLES. 
 
 I don't think I'd ever heard tell of that name, though, 
 as a favour — ite !" And by his expression of face, I 
 could see that he evidently thought that one of us 
 must have stood heavily against the said strangely- 
 named but fortunate winner. 
 
 At any other time how old Larabard would have 
 laughed at and enjoyed the poor fellow's mistake ! but 
 he was just then too much preoccupied with anathema- 
 tizing his enemy, and then went on to answer the 
 continuation of my inquiry. 
 
 *' How long have I known him ? Ever since I first 
 went up to Eton. That was the last Montem year, 
 which was, I think, two or three years before you 
 came up there. Strapper as I am now, I was a very 
 little fellow, small of my age, and was at first placed 
 far down in the lower part of the school ; and Gorles, 
 strange as it seems to look back to, was the head 
 boy, or captain, as we used to call them, you re- 
 member, of my tutor's house, and was then what 
 seemed to me ever so much bigger than myself. I 
 remember considering him quite * a big fellow ' — 
 fancy ! 
 
 " I had not been at the school above two or three 
 weeks, when having been ordered up one morning with 
 half-a-dozen other lower boys to breakfast-fagging at 
 the captain's mess, Gorles, who had never yet exchanged
 
 INFLUENCES. 23 
 
 a single word with me, or, as might' have been sup- 
 posed, ever even noticed my existence, walked round 
 to where I was standing, and bringing his odious face 
 close down to mine, with that same satanic grin which 
 you may have observed to-day, and which I have 
 never had out of my mind from that day to this, de- 
 liberately took aim with his clenched fist, measured 
 his distance, and then, without the slightest cause or 
 provocation, struck me with all his might on the 
 spot covered by about the third button of my waist- 
 coat. 
 
 " By all the pepper of the Lambards ! this was 
 more than I could stand. Like a young tiger cat, I 
 was at him in an instant, and I felt my little fist go 
 smash into his grinning face with all my power, such 
 as it was, — childish, of course, — but with all the good- 
 will that fury and indignation could lend to it. 
 
 "You, who remember the strict rules of public 
 school discipline, and how utterly unheard of such an 
 atrocity as a fag— a new lower boy — daring to raise 
 his fist against a Fifth-form is, and ought to be — can 
 appreciate the astonishment and consternation of my 
 surrounding fellow-fags, not perhaps unmixed with 
 suppressed delight. 
 
 " Though probably such feelings on their part were 
 as nothing compared with those of the cowardly little
 
 24 MELCIIIOR GORLES. 
 
 bully himself, who could never have dreamt of suck 
 quick returns to his unprovoked assault. 
 
 " But I gave him no time to think, for in at him I 
 went ' hammer and tongs ;' and so, with right on my 
 side, I called to mind and felt 1 was acting up 
 to the last words of advice my poor dear old father had 
 given me, when shaking me by the hand as he left 
 me at the door, 
 
 " ' Never tell a lie, my boy !' he said ; ' never tell 
 tales of your school-fellovv's, and never take a blow 
 from any of them, great or small, without returning 
 it, if given for nothing !' 
 
 "And although this last did not, it is true, quite 
 answer in this instance, I think, as a general rule, it 
 was good counsel, founded on a sound knowledge of 
 human nature. 
 
 " ' Depend upon it none but a rank coward at heart 
 will ever strike a little fellow for nothing ; and if you 
 stick up to him (my father had himself been at Eton, 
 and kept many of his old school expressions through 
 life), ' ten to one he will leave you alone for the future, 
 even if you get the worst of it for the time. You 
 can but have a licking after all, while you have given 
 back at least something in return ; and one good fight 
 against odds will save you from scores of bullyings, if 
 not lickings, which, I dare sav, you will deserve !'
 
 INFLUENCES. 25 
 
 " And so as this idea flashed through my mind, at 
 him I went ; and "when he tumbled backwards over 
 his breakfast-table,, amidst a smash of crockery, as he 
 did, — more, I suppose, from surprise than under the 
 actual force of my sudden attack, — I flung a sausage- 
 dish at his head ; and it was well for him that it 
 smashed against the opposite wall instead of its in- 
 tended object. 
 
 " But short was my triumph, for he was up again 
 directly, and springing at me, we closed and tumbled 
 over together ; when, although I kicked away at his 
 shins as hard and as long as I could, yet having got 
 me under him and sitting astride my chest, he seized 
 me by my ears and was pounding my poor little head 
 against the floor, till I really beheve he "would have 
 killed me, if Mary Anne, the boys'-maid, had not 
 rushed in and rescued me, but not before I was all but 
 senseless : and so for nearly three days I lay in my 
 turn-down bed, queer and delirious. 
 
 " Indeed I believe it was even longer than that time 
 before I could appreciate the visits and levees of 
 friendly lower boys to my room, and understand 
 entirely their reports of how Gorles had been sent up 
 to the Doctor, and though he had escaped a flogging, 
 had been turned down into the lower division for the 
 rest of the half.
 
 26 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 " That he had also been mobbed and publicly hooted 
 in the school-yard; which led to further and confusing 
 discussions whether with such demonstrations of 
 public sympathy towards myself, I should still have 
 to undergo, ' a college hiding' in long chamber for 
 hitting an upper boy ; to which awful penalty I had 
 no doubt rendered myself in strict law liable ; but, 
 under the circumstances, whether it would be carried 
 out ? And then followed other wonderings and serious 
 topics which are wont to obfuscate the lucid brains of 
 each succeeding generation of small boys while still 
 in a fourth-form state of development. 
 
 " The fact is, that when I recovered and was * in 
 school ' again I found myself, if not quite a hero, at 
 least famoifs, and the object of a ' sensation' as they 
 call it now-a-days. 
 
 " And so far let me here mention that I found the 
 parental advice proved right after all; for in the 
 whole course of my time at Eton, which was, I should 
 say, as happy and jolly a one as perhaps any one of 
 the many thousands who have been through the same, 
 I never once, I think, received a gratuitous licking, 
 or had occasion for another fight, from that day, 
 until of course my mill on the Brocas, just before 1 
 left, with the Badger.
 
 INFLUENCES. 27 
 
 " But now to return to Gorles, and what I was going 
 to tell you. 
 
 " On the second or third night, as I lay still confused 
 and but half sensible from the effect of the pounding 
 my poor little head had received — they have always 
 tried to persuade me that it Avas a dream and delusion — 
 but I know better, and as true as I am here in this 
 dusty road telling you, so am I sure and ready to 
 swear that what I now relate to you is a positive fact 
 and no delusion. 
 
 " I will allow that I had been asleep for some little 
 time before, but was quite wide awake — broad awake 
 — and distinctly heard the college-clock chime the 
 four quarters, and then strike one — two — three, when 
 I became conscious of a heavy pressure on my chest; 
 and, how he came there I cannot say, but there was 
 Gorles, partly dressed, astride as he had sat on me 
 when he banged my head, and his mouth was close 
 down to mine, as I lay there helpless on my back ; 
 and he was either breathing into, or, as my impression 
 was then, and still is, himself inhaling my breath with 
 great deep sucks. 
 
 " Our eyes met: there was a dim light burning in the 
 room, and for what, certainly as I look back seems 
 an interval of some minutes, there he was and con-
 
 28 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 tinned Lis operation, while I could feel my heart, 
 thump, thump, thumping, like the pendulum of a 
 great church clock. 
 
 " As to the exact duration of time, I may he under a 
 delusion ; but as to the fact I am so certain and posi- 
 tive, that I would swear to it with my last breath. 
 
 " I was powerless. I tried to struggle, and did my 
 best to cry out, but without avail, as one feels in a 
 nightmare — and yet that was no nightmare or sleeping 
 imagination — it was fact. 
 
 " It was Gorles who himself broke the silence first, as 
 he again seemed to inhale with special force at my 
 heavy breathing, for he muttered to himself as it were, 
 " There is real Spirit here, and it shall serve me 
 through life." 
 
 " Then it was that, with a redoubled strain, I found 
 utterance for my voice, and with a loud cry of agony 
 roused the whole house. 
 
 " It seemed in less than an instant that ray room 
 was full of boys in their night-shirts, some looking 
 frightened out of their wits, some laughing while their 
 teeth were chattering with cold, others angry and 
 beginning to abuse me for disturbing them from their 
 warm beds : and a comical figure old Mary Anne the 
 boys'-maid looked, wrapped tight up in her counter- 
 pane like a mummy, though I was then, heaven
 
 INFLUENCES. 29 
 
 knows, in no state much to appreciate the absuvdity of 
 her appearance. 
 
 " I was nearly wikl with terror, and Mary Anne, who, 
 as you may remember, was apt to be sharp and handy 
 enough with her tongue as a reguhir rule, was quite 
 gentle with me ; and when she had cleared the room, 
 and driven all the other fellows back to their beds, 
 slie tried to soothe and comfort me almost as if I had 
 been a baby in arms. 
 
 " No one would listen to my account of what really 
 had made me cry out; no one would believe a word of it. 
 All declared that Gorles had never been to my room ; 
 indeed, was the only one in the house who had not 
 joined the rush to see what was the row. One or two 
 at first had so far corroborated my statement as to 
 agree that they thought they had heard the noise of 
 some person running by, and the slam of a door at 
 the end of his passage. 
 
 "But when, after a parley as to the propriety of 
 invading the Captain's room at such an hour and on 
 such an unlikely charge, some of the elder fellows did 
 go in to satisfy themselves, Gorles was in bed, and 
 fast asleep. 
 
 "That is, of course, shamming to be so, the only soul 
 in the house who had been entirely undisturbed by my 
 shriek. I was very ill, indeed, after that night ;
 
 30 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 delirious, I believe, at times, and by night and day- 
 haunted by visions of my tormentor. 
 
 " I shudder even now to look back upon the rage and 
 misery it used to put me into when I found that no 
 one would listen for a moment, firmly and un- 
 changeably as I stuck to my account of the visita- 
 tion and unhallowed operation I had undergone from 
 that abominable little vampire. 
 
 "Gorles himself, when told of my accusation against 
 him, never would deny it, though he, of course, never 
 admitted it ; but, always grinning with an evil expres- 
 sion of malice, seemed rather to vaunt himself and 
 be rather pleased than not at the horrible idea. 
 
 " I could not myself understand or attempt to define, 
 but with all my soul I dreaded the spiritual power 
 which I intuitively felt that Gorles had gained over 
 me. For hours together, long after I had recovered 
 and was all right again, I used to brood over and 
 wonder in what shape I should begin to be actually 
 conscious of his influence ; but it steadily grew and 
 increased upon me."
 
 31 
 
 CHAPTER III. 
 
 ETON REMINISCENCES. 
 
 " After my recovery I was appointed fag to another 
 fifth-form master, and lie was kind enough to me, 
 requiring nothing more than the ordinary duties at his 
 breakfast and tea times, and dispensing even with my 
 constant attendance on those occasions, as kmg as I 
 and the other two who were with me could arrange 
 among ourselves or with tlie maids that everything 
 should he on his table, right and ready for him, as 
 he required it. 
 
 *• So with that great gulf between us which exists at 
 Eton between an upper and a fourth-form boy, there 
 was no reason there should ever have been any further 
 communication between Gorles and myself. 
 
 "We never exchanged a word or were even in the 
 same room together, except at dinner or supper, and 
 on those occasions there was the whole length of a 
 long table between our places ; yet 1 somehow always 
 felt and knew that he was constantly watching mc.
 
 32 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 He evidently was aware of and enjoyed the horror and 
 terror he insjiired. Without knowing the cause, I 
 have again and again suddenly felt a cold shiver come 
 over me, and, on looking round, have caught the 
 glance of his sinister grey eyes, as he would turn from 
 me with a Satanical grin ; and resist it as I often tried 
 and determined to do, and although, as I have just 
 said, we next to never exchanged a word, I have felt 
 myself compelled involuntarily to follow him, ay, 
 even on occasions to fag for him, in such a way, for 
 instance, as in securing a five's wall after chapel, 
 which he has immediately come upon, and hy superior 
 right taken from me ; carrying a wrong bat down to 
 the playing fields by mistake for some other fellow's, 
 and then find that Gorles had just been wishing for 
 it ; and so on many other like occasions, accidentally, 
 as it were, serving him without his ever having had 
 the trouble even of sending me, or telling me his 
 wants. 
 
 " On more than one occasion, incredible as it must 
 seem, and though I was never, as a child, before that 
 time, addicted to somnambulism, I have awakened 
 suddenly, finding that I had in my sleep actually 
 walked into Gorles's room, at three or four o'clock in 
 the morning, having only recovered myself in time to 
 escape, as I have thought, before he should recognise
 
 ETON REMINISCENCES. 33 
 
 me : and afterwards heard that he has casually stated 
 that if he had not accidentally been roused at some 
 particularly early hour he should never have got 
 through his verses or other school work which he had 
 left to the chance of waking early enough in the 
 morning to finish. Specially antipathic as he and I 
 were, if I may say so with this strange unaccountable 
 support thus existing between us, Gorles was generally 
 disliked by all the rest of my tutor's fellows. 
 
 " All had a kind of dread and seemed afraid of per- 
 sonally offending him. Among the upper boys of 
 his own standing he had no real friends, and but little 
 association. While as to the lower boys, he bullied, 
 fagged them about right and left, and licked all those 
 he could without mercy. As I myself in the course 
 of time worked my way up to the higher forms in the 
 school, and out of the regions of fagging, I always 
 kept entirely aloof from him, except sometimes when 
 I could not help interfering on behalf of some little 
 wretch whom he was more than ordinarily tor- 
 menting. 
 
 " But for that I was sure to pay the penalty, some- 
 how or other ; for the mysterious influence was 
 always over me, and I may safely say that of all the 
 hundreds of scrapes I was in, and in every single row, I 
 could always trace the immediate cause to Gorles, 
 
 VOL. I. D
 
 34 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 more or less, though very often quite apparently in- 
 directly, and as if by mere accidental coincidence. 
 
 " Twice, as you may have heard, I was as near as 
 possible drowned ; the first time I was learning to 
 scull, before I could swim — ' passing' was not insti- 
 tuted in those days, you know, before that poor 
 fellow was run down by the bargeman ; my boat was 
 all of a sudden caught and capsized by the rope of 
 an empty punt, left swinging to an osier stump by 
 Gorles, who had gone to bathe further up the river. 
 Again, after that, when I had acquired that necessary 
 art, I was suddenly seized with the cramp while 
 swimming at the weir, and fished up insensible, not 
 apparently worth picking out — as near a shave that 
 time as anything, except an unowned cat, ever lived 
 through to look back upon. 
 
 " It is true I had no business to be at that place at 
 all, but there would have been no danger if the proper 
 waterman had been at his post ; but I am hanged if 
 it was not Gorles again who had called him away 
 to hunt for crayfish, out of sight and ear-shot till 
 almost too late. 
 
 " As soon as I was well again, I was complained of 
 and flogged for bathing where I had no right to go ; 
 not, as the Doctor explained to my remonstrances, for 
 having the cramp, but for an example.
 
 ETON REMINISCENCES. 35 
 
 " Nor was that the only time by many, more often 
 than I can now count up, that I caught it through 
 Gorles, but without exception always somehow or 
 other connected with him. 
 
 " Then, one race-week, when a lot of us ran right 
 against my tutor as we were coming out of the 
 theatre, all bolted and escaped except myself, who, 
 rushing up a passage tumbled clean over something, 
 which at the moment came bowling out against me, 
 and so I was nailed. I at first fancied it was a big 
 dog,'and began to look out for my legs ; but when I had 
 picked myself up, what should it be sprawling under 
 me, and crushed out of all shape, but my * hete, 
 noire,' positively spitting with rage ; though as I got 
 another rattling switching, I thought I was the most 
 aggrieved in the collision of the two. 
 
 " Accused through him of talking in chapel, both 
 times unjustly, — I was merely asking some question 
 about the anthem, or what the day of the month was 
 for the psalms, — as bad luck would have it, Billy 
 Carter, who was the Master 'in Desk,' had his 
 eye right on me, attracted by a demoniacal noise 
 like an engine signal : Gorles again, who sat on 
 the high seats behind me, blowing that abomi- 
 nable turn-up nose of his ! And another time drop- 
 ping his book with a bang, and so bringing the atten- 
 
 D 2
 
 36 MELCUIOR GORLES. 
 
 tion of the whole chapel upon our quarter just exactly 
 at the only moment I happened to open my lips. 
 
 " It was always the same ; so that I had quite come 
 to regard it as my destiny, and to make up my mind 
 to hear it philosophically. 
 
 "Even after he had left Eton — you were fresh up at 
 that time, you know. Little one, hut may perhaps re- 
 member how Snaffles and I caught it so again, and 
 were as near as possible expelled for driving the 
 ' bus' from Slough to Fifteen-arch Bridge, when we 
 had the misfortune to upset it. 
 
 "When the passengers, who were so absurdly indig- 
 nant, because we raced the rival ' bus,' and so in our 
 anxiety ran bang into the ditch, were all bundling out 
 from behind, I really could hardly believe my own 
 eyes when out came Gorles, if you please, whom I 
 had never noticed get in. 
 
 "What on earth he could have come down for, I 
 cannot think, as I am quite sure he had left no friends 
 behind who would have cared to see his ugly little 
 face again. 
 
 " And how any of the fellows ever could have 
 thought of allowing him to be a sitter to a boat on the 
 4th of June, I cannot imagine ; but they did. I was 
 then rowing six in the ' Thetis,' and, to my disgust, 
 just as we were starting, who should I see but himself
 
 ETON REMINISCENCES. 37 
 
 squatting up like an ape, in the stern of our boat, his 
 httle eyes twinkhng with mahce, as he wagged his 
 head at me, and asked if it was not an unexpected 
 pleasure to see him there ? 
 
 " It was too late for me to get out of it, which was 
 my first idea ; but I knew we should come to some 
 grief: and so we did. 
 
 " My oar snapped short off, for no manner of appa- 
 rent reason, as we were going into the locks ; and at 
 night, the second time we were going down, ' hard all/ 
 among a blaze of fireworks, we ran plump on to 
 Windsor Bridge, smashing our boat all to smithereens, 
 and so had to swim for it in all our fine uniforms and 
 toggery : and in consequence of the howling, shouting, 
 and terrible bad language (which was entirely our 
 sitter, who was as drunk as Bacchus), all as bad 
 luck, or rather I should say, Gorles' malign influence, 
 would have it, taking place close under where the 
 l^resent Head Master, with a large party of ladies, had 
 secured an excellent place for the show, the whole 
 boat's crew were next morning sent up, and severely 
 dealt with as having been guilty of most unseemly 
 language, and of gross intoxication on that festive 
 occasion. 
 
 "A nice bill we had to pay amongst us for the 
 smashed boat into the bargain, to which Master Gorles
 
 38 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 who, our coxswain always swore, had in his drunken 
 frenzy pulled the rudder lines out of his hand, and 
 steered right on to the bridge wilfully, when applied 
 to for a subscription, entirely declined even noticing 
 the respectful invitation. That incident, however, 
 had the beneficial effect of preventing a recurrence 
 of his visits to Eton or its neighbourhood, at least 
 while I remained there, and I fancy ever since, 
 
 " Bless you, I could go on to fill whole encyclo- 
 psedias with the wrongs he has occasioned me. 
 
 " Did not his evil eye kill my favourite terrier ? or, 
 as I shall always believe, he poisoned it ; any liow, lie 
 ■ saw it one day at Fisher's yard and wanted to buy it ; 
 he said nothing when he was told that it was not for 
 sale, but was my property. The dog was perfectly well 
 that afternoon, but sickened and died that very 
 nisfht !
 
 CHAPTEE IV. 
 
 QUID QUID ID EST TIMED DANAOS ET DONA 
 FERENTES. 
 
 " But before he left, there was one special occurrence 
 which, though I left it out of its proper place, I may 
 as well tell you, for of course as it was only just before 
 you yourself came up, you may have heard some of 
 the sensation and row it made in my tutor's house. 
 I can hardly even now bear to think of, or mention 
 it ; it makes my blood tingle to remember that for a 
 single moment, false as it proved, such a suspicion 
 should ever have been connected with my name. 
 But if that ' plant' had succeeded, as it was intended 
 to do, in branding me with the character of ' a Thief, ' 
 I should have just blown my own brains out — I mean: 
 (he, as it were, almost jerked out, as if, for very shame 
 at such an idea, it still stuck hard in his throat), I 
 mean, about that five-pound note that young Ordwell 
 lost. 
 
 And in that most flagrant instance of all, though I 
 have told you that it was indirectly, and as if acciden-
 
 40 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 tally, that Gorles exerted his strange influence against 
 me, the more I think of it, the more I shall always 
 believe that that was as infernal a plot as ever was 
 concocted by one fellow to ruin another in this world. 
 
 The fact is, I was at that time awfully hard up for 
 money : — I always was, you know, some how or other ; 
 it was, you might say, my normal condition so to be : 
 my means, thougli I must in justice to my parents 
 acknowledge, rather above than below the average, 
 were in no sort of way proportionate to my wants. I 
 had asked two or three of ray more intimate friends 
 if they could lend me a few pounds. I knew they 
 would have done so if they could, but they were quite 
 as badly off as myself. 
 
 It happened to be just the time that I was crazy 
 to be elected stroke of the " Victory," the very height 
 of my ambition ; but I had received a hint that I must 
 pay up my subscription and arrears at once, or the 
 oar would be given over to some one else. Gorles 
 knew all this ; how, I don't exactly know, except that 
 he always intuitively had a perfect acquaintance with 
 all about me, and all my concerns, avoid him as I 
 made a point of doing. 
 
 Now some two or three weeks before the time I 
 speak of, there had been some ugly rumours at my 
 tutor's about money missing. Little Ordwell had lost
 
 TIMEO DANA OS, ETC. 41 
 
 a five-pound note out of his Lureau. This, of course, 
 caused a miserably uncomfortable feeling through the 
 house. We had, for our public character's sake, kept 
 it hushed up as much as possible ; and, nothing having 
 turned up to throw suspicion on any one individual 
 more than another, no one had taken upon him- 
 self to mention the matter to the authorities. 
 
 Young Ordwell himself, who owned to having saved 
 it up, out of what he had brought back with him, and 
 his weekly allowance, and having just before he lost 
 it changed his savings from coin into paper, received 
 more than one kick and licking, for presuming to have 
 so much to lose, at the end of the half as it was, in- 
 stead of having spent it like a gentleman ; indeed, some 
 boys chose to doubt and disbelieve the fiict as impro- 
 bable, amounting almost to an impossibility. 
 
 Well, as I say, this liad occurred, and naturally 
 tended to throw a cloud over us all. Some little time 
 before my dilemma about my boat subscription I was 
 regularly down in the mouth ; and having passed a 
 wretched night, at the prospect of losing the much- 
 coveted oar, and the position it would have given me 
 in the school, as well as at my own tutor's, I had just 
 come out from eight o'clock school with the usual 
 " write out and translate" injunction for not having 
 known a single word of my " lung Horace," when, on
 
 42 MELCEIOR OORLES. 
 
 m 
 
 entering my own room, I found two letters on my 
 table. 
 
 One, I saw at a glance, was from home, which in 
 consequence of my last communication from that 
 quarter, I am now ashamed to say, I did not some- 
 how feel in any very particular hurry to open ; that 
 was, I suppose, the reason of my tearing the other en- 
 velope first without looking or thinking about where 
 it may have come from. But what do you think were 
 my feelings when there fell out a live-pound note, 
 crisp and clean ? — folded in a sheet of note paper, on 
 Avhich was written in a strange hand: — 
 
 "This from a friend, who knows how much you 
 
 want it, who will declare himself when you can pay, as 
 
 he knows you will : pay up your dues to the boat, 
 
 and ask no questions ; only on your honour, as a 
 
 gentleman, you m.ust feel bound to mention this to 
 
 nobody, but promise to bum the letter and envelope 
 
 immediately when read." 
 
 Signed '' N. M." 
 
 Who on earth N. M. could be I could not imagine, 
 except the party in the Catechism ; but, whoever he 
 was, what a real trump ! and what a real Godsend this 
 at first sight seemed to be. 
 
 Such were my first feelings of wonder, mixed with
 
 TIMEO DANAOS, ETC. 43 
 
 those of relief and gratitude. The condition was 
 easily complied with, by throwing the letter behind 
 the fire without a second thought. 
 
 In another minute I was rushing off, forthwith to 
 pay up and settle all claims upon me, when, as I 
 flung out of my door, I tumbled right over Gorles, 
 who seemed very much taken aback, as well he might 
 be, for he was in the very act of leaning forward, as 
 if he had been thinking of peeping through my key- 
 hole, though, by my sudden rush, arrested in the 
 accomplishment of his desire. 
 
 He muttered something indistinctly, whether of 
 abuse or apology I could hardly say ; but something 
 about wishing only to know whether I had received my 
 letters safely ; which, considering the terms we were 
 always on, struck me as being somewhat impertinent. 
 
 But it was not until, having bowled down stairs, 
 three steps at a time, I had arrived at the bottom, 
 that the sudden thought flashed through my mind 
 that there had been something about my evil genius's 
 expression, even more than usual, peculiarly sinister, 
 which thought made me pull up in my impetuosity to 
 have a think ; and to assist that mental operation, I 
 naturally plunged my hands into the depths of my 
 breeches-pockets. 
 
 My thoughts were so decidedly unpleasant, that it
 
 U MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 was quite a relief to find the other letter, which had 
 been driven out of ray mind, but which I now opened 
 as I walked along more slowly. 
 
 Well ! if I never thought much about a special 
 Providence before that time, I did so then, aud have 
 often since felt grateful for the same ! A cheque 
 from my dear mother for five pounds, which she said 
 she could well afford from her private purse, was there 
 enclosed with eight closely crossed sides of prayers 
 and hopes, and gentle lecture about extravagance, and 
 so on. 
 
 I had, you see, written to my father in despair, 
 for I had, I must confess, been rather "going it " that 
 half, and had from him two days before received a 
 similar effusion, only of a more masculine character, 
 and omitting the accompanying molUficr, which he 
 had begged entirely to decline, and that was, you see, 
 what had caused me to be so specially out of sorts 
 about the business. 
 
 Well, thus reinforced in means as well as spirits, 
 that passing troublewas notverylong about being satis- 
 factorily settled, and with the mysterious fiver still 
 unchanged in my pocket, I returned to my breakfast, 
 revolving many queer thoughts and suspicions in 
 my mind; thoughts which, I think, physiologically 
 speaking, must have somewhat interfered with the
 
 TIMEO DANA OS, ETC. 45 
 
 proper digestion of that meal, which was no sooner 
 hastily despatched, than quite forgetting, or rather 
 as I did not now mean to avail myself of it, not feel- 
 ing hound hy its accompanying conditions, I went off 
 to Old Wysore's room — Socrates, don't you remember, 
 we used to call him? — and a good name too, for he 
 was as full of knowledge and sound sense as that, or 
 any other philosopher you would like to name. 
 
 Though, of course, such a regular old sap as he 
 was, and myself, were not exactly companions, or much 
 thrown together in our ways and amusements, yet we 
 were always fast friends, and I believe few fellows 
 mutually liked each other more than we did, as total 
 opposites often do. 
 
 When I went up to his room he had just finished 
 devouring his morning's allowance of jam. Those 
 reading fellows always do devour such a lot of 
 jam and marmalade, and he was, I well remember, for 
 it struck me so particularly, turning " Old Mother 
 Hubbard " into Greek iambics. For fun ! he told me. 
 Fancy any one seeing any fun in such an awful idea ! 
 
 He listened patiently while I told him all my story, 
 and showed him the bank-note I had received. I was 
 quite furious with myself for having been such an 
 idiot as to burn the letter and cover in which it had 
 come. I omitted no details, even to the tumbling
 
 46 MELCniOR GORLES. 
 
 over Gorles, as I was rushing out of my own door, 
 and the extraordinary good luck by which legitimate 
 means had so opportunely turned up by the very same 
 post, and so saved me from paying away the note, 
 which I certainly should otherwise have done. 
 
 I do not think I set forth in so many words all the 
 suspicions that had occurred to me, but naturally I 
 wound up with an extra stress on how something- 
 peculiar in Gorles' manner and look had made me 
 glad — I could not say how glad — that I had not in my 
 haste made use of the mysterious gift. 
 
 " Eum," slowly and oracularly pronounced Socrates, 
 when he had heard my narrative all through to the 
 end, and then he made a quotation, which I dare say you 
 would knowif I could only say it right; somethingabout 
 funking the Danes, when they n.xe ' dona ferentes \' 
 anyhow, it was very appropriate, and he wound it up by 
 declaring it again to be most decidedly rum. "But,'' 
 continued he, " being, as I am, aware of your inve- 
 terate prejudice and feeling against that particular 
 party, I should not, perhaps, think it so very rum as I 
 do, if it did not happen to coincide in a very remark- 
 able manner with a very remarkable speech made by 
 Gorles the other morning, from which, connected with 
 what you now tell me, it requires no great stretch of 
 imagination to fancy that he may have had some
 
 TIMEO DAN A OS, ETC. 47 
 
 such idea in his head ; still, I could scarcely have 
 thought that any fellow could have ever had the fiend- 
 like malice in him to have gone such lengths for the 
 sake of revenge ; but, as I say, it certainly is a strange 
 coincidence that, some days ago, Gorles was abusing 
 and inveighing most bitterly against you, for inter- 
 fering between himself and some small boy he had 
 been bullying ; and he then declared, before a lot of 
 us who were standing round, that he hated you to that 
 degree that he was determined to make the house too 
 hot to hold you, and that he would willingly give five or 
 even ten pounds to do so. It was a rum idea, which I 
 remarked particularly, because Jemmy Eyler, who was 
 there, said he thought my tutor would expect 
 more than that, if his intention was to offer to 
 bribe him to expel you; and went on to ask him 
 ■whether he fancied he was in Italy or Spain, and 
 intended hiring a bravo to stick you through the 
 back with a stiletto ; and so they were going on chaffing 
 him." 
 
 " And, to tell you the trutb, he certainly has more 
 than once, not in so many words exactly, seemed to 
 insinuate and make sort of indirect inuendos against 
 yourself in regard to young Ordwell's money. 
 
 " There, don't flare up!" old Wysore said, com- 
 placently, as he saw me naturally bristling up at
 
 48 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 this announcement " No single fellow would, for an 
 instant, allow the idea ; which Gorles had, as I tell 
 you, barely suggested before he was regularly groaned 
 down ; but, be calm, and let us call in two or three of 
 the leading fellows of the house as witnesses, foi', " in 
 the multitude of councillors, is there not wisdom?" — 
 and then I should advise, if they, when they have 
 heard the whole case, agree in thinking of it as I do 
 that you should go boldly to my tutor and lay the 
 whole matter before him." 
 
 So Eyler, Maine, and Sandy Kannietiy were sum- 
 moned to a solemn consultation, and their general 
 verdict was fully in accordance with the sound advice 
 of Socrates. 
 
 Except Sandy, who, though he said he quite agreed 
 with the rest, would continue to desire us to 'Bide a 
 wee, bide a wee ; ye may, ye know, have grave suspi- 
 cions which are no facts : so just bide a wee, while 
 I will keep my weather-eye open, and maybe proofs 
 will crop out.' But as it turned out, it was truly lucky 
 that I had thus at once consulted those fellows, and 
 so established them as witnesses to back me, and prove 
 that it was my own wish and intention of at once in- 
 viting investigation on the subject. 
 
 That very same day, after dinner, my tutor called us 
 all back to stay, and, with evidently deep feeling and
 
 TIMEO DANAOS, ETC. 49 
 
 distress of mind, inquired if any boy had, during the 
 half, lost any money, or if we had heard of any un- 
 pleasant rumours of money having been missing in 
 his liouse, for, — he -went on to say, and I suppose it 
 Avas my consciousness, not I mean of guilt, but of the 
 shame of knowing that I had been indirectly hinted at, 
 that made me feel his eyes resting particularly on my- 
 self — averse as he now felt, and as every one of course 
 would feel, to take notice of any anonymous accusa- 
 tions ; yet, in regard to so serious a charge, which 
 affected even himself, as well as all who were under 
 his roof, he wished to inquire first, as to the fact of 
 money having thus been lost, and if so, had there 
 arisen any reason to attach suspicion to any particular 
 individual. He was only too grieved to say, that a 
 letter he had received by post that morning tended to 
 convey to him that there was one amongst us (here he 
 looked very hard at myself) who could be satisfac- 
 torily proved to have been unable to pay his boat sub- 
 scription over night, and somehow to have found 
 means to do so in the morning. And then, suddenly 
 turning upon me in a sharp tone, he asked : " Lam- 
 bard, have you anything to say, or explanation to 
 give, in this matter ?" 
 
 My blood was, as you may suppose, well up ; so, 
 feeling that I had the game on my side, I spoke out 
 
 VOL. I. E
 
 50 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 pretty plainly, without taking much thought as to 
 either my manners or my words. '' In the first place. 
 Sir," I asked, " does this anonymous letter you allude 
 to dare to mention me by name ? if not, by what 
 right do you try to turn these suspicious so immedi- 
 ately and specially against me, more than any other boy 
 in the house ? and then may I beg leave to examine 
 carefully the handwriting of the said letter, to see how 
 far it will agree with one I myself received by the 
 earlier post, but have like a fool destroyed; and 
 thirdly, was the number of the note lost by Ordwell, 
 79264 ? for if so, here it is." 
 
 And with what must have appeared to those who 
 had not been behind the scenes, the most astounding 
 effrontery (for all the house knew how " hard up " I 
 had been only the day before), I produced the above 
 numbered note from my pocket and laid it upon the 
 table. 
 
 "And now. Sir," I continued, "in regard to that 
 same anonymous letter, on the strength of which 
 you have so publicly, I might almost venture to say, 
 so unjustly, thought fit to throw upon me the suspi- 
 cion of this disgrace, allow me respectfully to say that 
 I think the call rests with me ; and as publicly I beg 
 leave to express my suspicion, and firm conviction, 
 that the author of that accusation, as well as of the trap
 
 TIMEO DANA OS, ETC. 51 
 
 laid for me this morning, is no other than the person 
 now standing at your own right hand. Look at him," 
 I cried, turning round, " look at him, how he winces 
 before my accusation, all of you fellows, and say 
 which of us looks most like a thief and a cowardly 
 villain : myself or that fellow Gorles ! " 
 
 The little wretch was perfectly livid, and seemed 
 crumpled up into half his even natural dwarfish size. 
 He stammered out something about not standing there 
 to be thus insulted, and rushed out of the room, fol- 
 lowed by almost the whole concourse in one universal 
 groan and hoot of shame. 
 
 When Ordwell was called back and examined as to 
 the number of the note which he had lost, the young 
 muff had no idea whether the number was 79264, 
 (how well I remember the order of those figures to 
 this day) or not : he had never noticed, he said ; so the 
 perfect denouement of the domestic drama failed, you 
 see, to turn out as artistically as it ought to have done. 
 
 As to the mysterious note, as, of course, Gorles, 
 having had time to recover his self-possession, utterlv 
 denied any knowledge and claim to it, it was unani- 
 mously voted to be given over to Ordwell in the place 
 of the one he had lost ; but with a public and strict 
 injunction to spend it like a gentleman, and not dare 
 to bottle it as he had done. 
 
 e2 
 
 LIBRARY 
 
 UNIVERSITY OF ILUNCfS
 
 52 MELCniOR GORL£S. 
 
 Out of that loop-liole, my tutor, who, though a 
 good fellow in the main, I shall always think, in that 
 affair, behaved most w^eakly and unjustly, was too 
 happy, of course, to escape from the scandal of bring- 
 ing home so atrocious a piece of villany to the head 
 boy of his own house. 
 
 He also laid great stress on the fact of the hand- 
 writing of the anonymous letter not being that of 
 Gorles. As to that, it was like no one's, being evi- 
 dently disguised and unnatural, but, as I could swear, 
 precisely the same as that which I had received, and 
 so unfortunately destroyed in compliance with the strict 
 injunction, for which I now, though too late, saw the 
 reason. 
 
 But wasn't it lucky now, that by consulting those 
 other fellows immediately, I was thus saved ? for 
 you see that if I had kept it to myself for only half a 
 day, I must have been irrevocably done for. 
 
 It riled me not a little that, convinced as I was, 
 am, and ever shall be, of Goades' guilt, we could bring 
 no actual proof or evidence for conviction home to 
 him. 
 
 And that point, as I say, my tutor perceived and 
 held on to ; for after the abrupt departure of the little 
 brute, as I have described, with the whole ruck halloa- 
 ing at his heels, we, that is Wysore and the other three
 
 TIMEO DAN A OS, ETC. 53 
 
 unci myself, had stayed behind to tell my story plainly 
 and quietly. 
 
 It is fair to say that my tutor in those fellows' pre- 
 sence tendered me an ample apology, shaking me con- 
 descendingly by the hand. 
 
 But when I went on to lay before him my own 
 strong convictions, and equally strong grounds for 
 them, founded upon the unsvarrantable threats to 
 which these others could bear witness, he immediately 
 turned upon me with a burst of got-up indignation, 
 
 " Lambard," he said, quite fiercely, '"'you know that 
 original prejudice and illusion have now for more than 
 three years existed and become a species of monomania 
 
 with you : on that point you really are not quite" 
 
 and he hesitated (though I suppose he was going to 
 say sane) ; " and I cannot for a moment listen to you ; 
 but I am only too glad that you have thus satisfac- 
 torily cleared yourself of this unpleasant suspicion, 
 without the least," so he was pleased to say, " impli- 
 cating any one else." 
 
 So, pig-headed, as you know he could be if he 
 liked, he let the matter drop, 1 believe congratulating 
 himself on so easily seeing his way out of an ugly 
 business. That was the half, you know, Gorles was 
 leaving, and though for the remainder of his time the 
 majority of our house were more shy of him than ever,
 
 5i MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 yet, what with my tutor's example of wilfully bliuding 
 himself to such clear, though circumstantial evidence, 
 and to Kannietry's reiterated nonsense of its being a 
 case of " Not proven," there were a good many fellows 
 who chose to disbelieve, or at least to say that they 
 doubted his guilt in this matter. 
 
 So far, on the pure motive of judging others from 
 themselves, perhaps after all those were not to blame 
 who stuck to the charitable opinion that, disagreeable 
 and generally odious as he was acknowledged to be, 
 no fellow could really be so diabolically wicked as 
 thus deliberately to try to ruin a school-fellow's cha- 
 racter and whole look-out for life. 
 
 But then I say to that, that Gorles was not to be 
 judged by the ordinary rules of human nature ; imp 
 of evil, and positively and actually possessed as he is 
 by a devil, as you should hear, if I only had time to 
 tell you all that I have subsequently known and suf- 
 fered from his supernatural and diabolical acts. 
 
 Ugly big words, you say, and I see you opening the 
 eyes of astonishment, but I do not mean one jot less 
 than I say, supernatural and diabolical. 
 
 Wait till you have heard all, for you must not 
 imagine that my feelings of detestation, and, I will not 
 deny, dread of that little fiend incarnate, are only 
 founded on what I have now been telling you, about
 
 TIMEO DANAOS, ETC. 55 
 
 our old school-days. Why, as far as that goes, 
 many of those schoolboy adventures and reminis- 
 cences, though true every one of them, and more or 
 less connected with Gorles, had clean gone out of my 
 head for years past ; but I suppose seeing once more 
 your old familiar phiz, my dear fellow, brought back 
 old Eton and those scenes uppermost, as well as 
 dozens of others not worth telling, which might as 
 well be forgotten, except, of course, that rascally trick 
 against me, Avhich I have just kept to the last, but 
 which if I lived to a hundred I should never forget, 
 and yet all I have been telling you is merely a preface 
 or introduction to what is to come. 
 
 But, see, we have no time for more, for here we are 
 at the Kingston Station, and, by Jove, there goes the 
 signal for the up-train. We must make a rush for it. 
 I. feel cooler now, morally I mean, if not physically. 
 My walk and talk with you have done me good, and 
 have let off some of the steam ; so for the present I will 
 try to dismiss this fit of the dismals and be myself 
 again. I think I could even be jolly, if we are only 
 lucky enough to find some good party to chaff on our 
 way up, and have some fun with. I feel I shall be all 
 right again by the time we get to town."
 
 56 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER Y. 
 
 UNEXPECTED RECOGNITIONS. 
 
 By the time we were settled in our places, and had had 
 our first look round at the other occupants of the rail- 
 way compartment into which the guard had thrust us, 
 as the train was actually on the move, Lambard 
 really seemed to have recovered himself, and to be 
 ready for indulging his previously announced humour 
 for chafl&ng any fair object for such sport with wliom 
 we might chance to fall in. 
 
 The further opposite corner was occupied by a 
 stout lady, evidently of quality, rather past the 
 middle age, I should say, though still fat, fair, and 
 very blooming. " Blooming" was just what she was 
 all over. Magnificent flowers, intermingled with 
 clusters of fruit, bloomed in her bonnet, inside and 
 out, while rich and bright coloured representatives of 
 every variety of (I should say) a tropical vegetation 
 meandered in a striking though pleasing confusion 
 over the ample breadths of her rich silk dress.
 
 UNEXPECTED RECOGNITIONS. 57 
 
 I felt sure, as I looked at her in respectful adraira- 
 tioDjtbatin her own immediate circle, and towards all 
 her fellow creatures who had ever had the privilege of 
 being properly introduced to that grand lady, she 
 probably was a very model of radiant geniality and 
 beaming good nature ; but upon us unfortunate 
 strangers of another and an outer world her looks 
 were, I must confess, stern and anything but amiable. 
 
 She seemed amazed at our impertinence in ventur- 
 ing to intrude ourselves into that carriage, and thus 
 deranging her many shav/ls, air-cushions, hand-bags, 
 and other paraphernalia with which the seats opposite 
 and beside her were profusely covered. I could not 
 help thinking, with a feeling of awe, of Lambard's 
 proposed '"' chaff" as I caught that vacant blue eye ; 
 deigning for an instant to take a view of us over the 
 top of the Morning Post, which was held up as a sort 
 of screen against the common world, thus displaying, 
 though not that I mean with the slightest idea of any 
 vulgar ostentation, a round arm loaded with quite a 
 collection of cables, shackles, chains, lockets, bangles, 
 and a general miscellany of gimcracks which might 
 have gone far towards stocking a respectable Bond- 
 street shop window. 
 
 There was a something in that eye which, letting 
 alone natural good breeding, should have at once
 
 58 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 settled any question of "chaff" with the most 
 audacious and reckless of mortals. 
 
 But as I glanced round at Lambard, I saw that he 
 was not even looking at her. 
 
 He was staring with both his eyes open at 
 
 their widest at his vis-a-vis, who was either the 
 
 humble companion, or rather stuck-up maid of the 
 
 grand lady, I could not quite make up my mind 
 which. 
 
 She had a bonnet even more brilliant and variegated 
 in its many colours than that of her superior, stuck 
 on the top of a cluster of little corkscrew curls, which 
 hung down over her forehead and cheeks. 
 
 If the extreme tip of her rather sharp nose had not 
 been of the same bright carmine tint as those cheeks, 
 I should, I think, have been uncharitable enough to 
 have decided in my own mind that she certainly 
 rouged. 
 
 Lambard sat staring at her in so marked a manner 
 that the old lady was perhaps not altogether without 
 some just grounds for her manifest indignation. 
 
 " Ursulina," she said, in a very dry voice, " you had 
 better come over here opposite to me ; never mind 
 my inconvenience, I think you will be more com- 
 fortable. So, in spite of all protest on her part, 
 Ursulina had to move across, and squeeze herself, by
 
 UNEXPECTED RECOGNITIONS. 59 
 
 way of being more comfortable, into as mucb space 
 as was left by a tolerably-sized dressing-case, a pair 
 of goloshes, and other et ceteras, in the seat to which 
 she was directed. It struck me, that though Lam- 
 bard's manner had been remarkable, not to say rude, 
 she personally had no objection to his decided atten- 
 tion, for as she passed me I heard her utter, in soft 
 accents, to herself — 
 
 *' Well ! Did I ever ? Does he know me ?" 
 
 My companion, roused from his stare by the move- 
 ment, began to scratch his ear, evidently in deep 
 consideration, from which process, however, by the 
 expression of his face, he had not arrived at any very 
 satisfactory result, when, happening to look up into 
 the face of the only remaining occupant of our 
 carriage, he gave vent to a sort of exclamation of sur- 
 prise, as if in him also he had recognised an acquain- 
 tance, and then checked himself. 
 
 This third person was a very freckle-faced young 
 gentleman, arrayed in an exceedingly loud check suit, 
 with a gorgeous shirt-front, in which glittered a set 
 of studs in the shape of enamelled green beetles, 
 nearly the size of life. 
 
 He was so good as to commence conversation by 
 informing us that it was the Derby-Day, and that just 
 at that exact moment, as indicated by an absurdity
 
 60 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 of a small watch, of which he was evidently immensely 
 proud, and which he kept dangling on his finger, 
 that that exciting event was taking place at Epsom. 
 
 He went on to tell us how much he regretted 
 having been prevented by important, 1 am not quite 
 sure he did not say political, business from having 
 honoured the Course by his own presence, for that he, 
 or at least a most jjarticular friend and connexion 
 of his — correcting himself as he happened to catch 
 the old lady's glance — a most particular friend of his 
 had many thousands depending on the race. 
 
 We had not felt quite sure whether this pleasing 
 specimen of the rising generation belonged to the 
 grand old dame or not; but when he went further 
 to give us to understand that he himself was, or at 
 least on some contingency depending on some other 
 particular friend, that he probably might be the 
 owner of two if not three of the best favourites for 
 the next year, it was more than she could stand; 
 and with majestic and overwhelming indignation did 
 she speak out . — 
 
 " Oh, Ferdinand, can this be so ?" 
 
 " How long have you entered upon this road 
 to ruin ? " 
 
 " Little does your dear papa imagine, I am sure, 
 that his only son is an abandoned better and gambler;
 
 UNEXPECTED RECOGNITIONS. 61 
 
 but know it lie shall, for I will write to him this very- 
 night, you may rely upon it." 
 
 " You are quite right, ma'am ; nothing can be 
 possibly worse than a better," rejoined Lambard- 
 ■with a most respectful bow, as he ventured on that 
 atrocious pun, whicli I suppose he found irresistible. 
 
 " Sir, I am not in the habit of entering into conver- 
 sation -u'ith unknown strangers," was her stately reply. 
 
 Ferdinand, thus solemnly adjured, did not seem to 
 make much of his grandmamma's — or whatever she 
 really was to him — remarks or threats. 
 
 Indeed I am afraid he only laughed, and bade her 
 mind her own business. 
 
 Lambard went on drawing him out to any extent, 
 pretending to be glad of such an opportunity for de- 
 riving so much and such valuable information on the 
 subject of horses, training-stables, jockeys, handicaps, 
 and other turf matters, over and over again appealing 
 to me, whether it was not great luck to have fallen in 
 with so excellent a guide on sporting matters, and 
 evidently so much enjoying the idea, that he appeared, 
 as he had said he would, to have driven all his own 
 troubles and late violent feelings clean away. 
 
 Indeed, when reminded of them by the ticket-col- 
 lector, who, upon opening our carriage at Vauxhall, 
 civilly touched his cap with the information that
 
 62 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 " Caractacus" had won the Derby, it was only with 
 something between a grunt and a sigh that he replied, 
 " Thank ye kindly, all the same, but we could have 
 told you that three hours ago, we saw it run," to the 
 no small surprise and confusion of the young turfite 
 in the green beetles, who, encouraged as he had been, 
 had the very moment before been offering, in so many 
 words, to put us up to a specially good thing or two. 
 
 " Never mind, Ferdy, my boy," cried out my com- 
 panion, to my no small consternation at his rudeness, 
 as with a loud laugh he jumped out of the carriage. 
 " You seem quite to have forgotten me, though I 
 remembered you. It was only a case of instructing 
 your cousin instead of your grandmother, in the 
 sublime art of sucking eggs, you know. Don't you 
 know me now ?" 
 
 The bumptious youth stared hard, and then as a 
 recollection of Lambard's identity seemed to dawn 
 upon him, became as red as a turkey-cock, and 
 stammered out some mild expressions of delight at 
 the unexpected recognition. 
 
 " Never mind, old fellow," cried I'rank, with a hearty 
 slap on the back ; " I'm glad to see you. How's your 
 father, the old colonel ? Give my remembrances to him." 
 
 " I say, Ferdy !" he ran back after we had moved 
 some way down the platform, as if struck with some
 
 VNEXPECTED RECOGNITIONS. 63 
 
 sudden motive ; " I say, Ferdy, who was that okl 
 girl with you — not your new stepmother, the Blobb, 
 is it ?" 
 
 " Yes, the very same — the Blobb — confound her !" 
 answered Ferdy, very sulkily, as he stood there still 
 gaping like a stuffed pig. 
 
 " And is the other her old maid, Madam Cros- 
 kanski, nee Sniggers ? I couldn't imagine where I 
 had seen that woman's face before." 
 
 "Yes, you are right again," said the youth ; " con- 
 found her too. Where did you know them ?" 
 
 But Lambard had gone tearing off to the other end 
 of the station, exclaiming that, by Jove, he must have 
 another good look at " the Blobb," as he called that 
 great lady, in a most disrespectful manner. But they 
 were gone, and he came back presently disappointed. 
 
 "Who are they ?" I asked, 
 
 " I may, perhaps, tell you all in good time, my dear 
 little 'un," he said, with a very deep sigh, and as if 
 now again going to have a reaction in his spirits. 
 " What do you intend to do with yourself this even- 
 ing?" he inquired, as we walked down the steps 
 together from the station. 
 
 " I don't seem to care, somehow, about dining at 
 my club, as I meant to have done with two or three 
 other fellows, and afterwards going to some theatre,
 
 64 MELCIIIOR GORLES. 
 
 to wind up with Vauxball or Cremorne, by way of a 
 finish ; in short, what I am told is the regular every 
 Derby-Day mill-track. It will be such a bore having 
 to go through with all the congratulations, and then 
 explanations, about that confounded winning ticket. 
 What a lot of chaff, or, still worse, condolence, I shall 
 have to stand for having spilt that money as I have ; 
 for, of course, I must shell it all over as soon as it is 
 paid to me. 
 
 "No, that will all keep very well till to-mor- 
 row ; but, to-night, if you will let me, my dear 
 fellow, I will come and pick a bit quietly with you in 
 your own rooms, and afterwards, if you're agreeable, 
 over a tranquillizing pipe of peace, will go on with the 
 rest of my story in connexion with that veritable limb 
 of Satan, Master Gorles. Somehow, I feel specially 
 in the humour tliis evening, and having now once 
 got my start it will do me good, and be a real relief 
 to my mind to unbosom myself and at last uncork, 
 so to speak, some strange matters which have long 
 been bottled up, and I have never yet told to any 
 living soul as I feel inclined to tell them to you 
 this evening. That is, if you will not be bored, and 
 will have patience to hear me slick through to the end. 
 I think you will then be I'cady to agree that it is from 
 no mere imaginary or exaggerated prejudice, but a
 
 UNEXPECTED RECOGNITIONS. 65 
 
 well-founded conviction, and to repeat advisedly the 
 strong expression I before made use of, a sense of 
 something actually supernatural, or, as the Scotch 
 say, 'uncanny,' on which my antipathies are founded." 
 
 VOL. I,
 
 66 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER VI. 
 
 SIC TRANSIT GLORIA MUNDI ! 
 
 There are, indeed, many worse ways of enjoying a 
 really genuine soft summer's evening, particularly after 
 a broiling and exciting day, such as ours had been, 
 than that hit upon by Frank Lambard and myself. 
 
 We leisurely disposed of as tolerable a dinner, 
 in a very small way, as my very plain cook could 
 on so short a notice manage ; and now, our arm-chairs 
 drawn forward to either side of the wide-open window, 
 a brimming claret-jug of Badminton, fresh iced, on a 
 small table between us, while the lights of our cigars 
 began to twinkle like bright stars, in contrast to the 
 deepening shades of the twilight, calmly puffing, we 
 sat for some little time, enjoying, in that contemplative 
 silence which truly bespeaks the spirit of passive con- 
 tentment, the bustle, life, and motion going on below 
 us, watching, as we were, the return stream of car- 
 riages from Epsom. 
 
 Have I, by the way, yet mentioned that the cham-
 
 SIC TRANSIT GLORIA MUNDI ! 67 
 
 bers which I occupy are situated, as it so happens, in 
 one of the principal thoroughfares of the south-western 
 district of the town ? 
 
 What " morals might he pointed and tales adorned," 
 by any poet, philosopher, or other general dealer in 
 sentimental views on huQianitv. who, like us, that 
 pleasant June evening, might have been reclining at 
 his ease, contemplating the straggling line of vehicles 
 of all sorts, classes, and descriptions, now making 
 their way as best they could up that same road down 
 which, within so few hours ago, in how different a 
 condition, alas, how many had passed, " on pleasure 
 bent," that very morning ! 
 
 Think of all those glorious — no, tiptop (that's the 
 right word) — " four in hands," which rattled by so 
 gaily, while I was still at breakfast, " all tooled by 
 noble whips," as described in the advertisements ; and 
 really, I believe, popularly and sincerely supposed to 
 be Eight Honourable members of the Upper House, 
 or, at least, genuine scions of the proudest aristocracy, 
 whose affability and easy condescension of manners, 
 combined with their skill in "handling the ribbons," 
 give a tone, not to say eclat, to the company, and 
 contribute not a little to the, at least, temporary 
 social position and consequently happiness, of the 
 aspiring City clerks or West-end counter-jumpers, 
 
 f3
 
 68 MELCmOR GORLES. 
 
 who, for five-and-twenty shillings a head, have fairly 
 entitled themselves to a holiday's enjoyment, hon ton 
 and refreshments included. And small blame, too, to 
 these honest gents, if, perched, as they were, on the 
 top of " their drag," they may have cast the looks 
 of scorn and pity upon the envious, but admiring 
 world below. Who shall say that any one of them, 
 in his faultless " get up " of new white hat and gauze 
 veil, his graceful dust-coat, that indispensable desi- 
 deratum for the Course (I am again quoting from the 
 advertisement sheet) fluttering in the breeze ; his 
 tight kid gloves, grey, or even primrose colour, just 
 seen peeping from his arms, rigidly folded across his 
 manly breast, did not, as much as any duke or lord, 
 ay, millionaire, or any guardsman on earth, or on 
 horse either, for the matter of that, look every inch 
 "the thing"? 
 
 Let those, then, who thus saw, envied, and admired 
 bear well in mind that " 'tis but once a year" when 
 they shall recognise, if recognise they can, those same 
 disdainful, would-be swells transformed as in a pan- 
 tomime into the shouting noisy crew now passing 
 below. All those who still have hats, with the brims 
 of them stuck round with miniature lay figures in the 
 nude; some perched aloft on hampers piled on high 
 a-top of the coach ; some lying full-length along the
 
 SIC TRANSIT GLORIA MUNDI ! 69 
 
 cushions ; others hanging on promiscuously to the 
 steps or flying strtips behind ; some pelting the cheer- 
 ing crowd with snuff-boxes and pin-cushions, while, 
 perhaps, one behind is at intervals enlivening them 
 with most eccentric variations of popular airs on a 
 cornet-a-piston, which has been handed to him by 
 general vote as the most intoxicated and noisiest of 
 the lot, "by way of keeping the fellow quiet." Oh, 
 how their poor heads will crack and burn to-morrow 
 from the effects of the villanous stuff they have been 
 imbibing by the bucketful, which they insist upon, 
 and rejoice in supposing to be champagne. 
 
 Why is it that to that particular genus, the City 
 gent, and so many of the vulgar, not lower classes in 
 general, the summum honum of happiness and enjoy- 
 ment, the highest refinement of all luxury, seems to 
 be represented by, and connected in their minds with 
 the prevailing idea of " Lots of champagne" ? Well, 
 well, if all cannot understand it, it has been real en- 
 joyment to them, and though they will suffer for it 
 to-morrow, by Friday next, let us hope, they will be 
 all right again. 
 
 It would be well if their poor, jaded, over-strained 
 horses, whose wretched flanks begrimed with dust and 
 sweat, and whose staggering steps afford, if not as 
 striking, a far more painful contrast to their gingery
 
 70 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 splendour of the morning, could hope as easily to re- 
 cover themselves. Poor beasts ! the best look-out in 
 store for them would be to fall down in the road and 
 die at once, as has been the fate of probably not a 
 few by this time. If they only knew it^ how much 
 to be envied by their less fortunate because tougher 
 brethren ! 
 
 Though -wliilst thus sympathizing with the beast, 
 •what Christian of common charity will not also drop 
 a tear of pity for the sufferings of his fellow-man ! as 
 next appears a lately " noble whip," who, oh, bitter 
 ignominy ! has to bring back his once glad company, 
 dragged only by a tottering pair I shorn of their 
 leaders, who have either dropped on the road from 
 sheer exhaustion, or perhaps even worse, turned res- 
 tive, kicked, or gibbed, and to the disgrace of all con- 
 cerned, unavoidably sent back under the care of the 
 ostler. 
 
 Well may he hold down the head of shame, and let 
 his double thong, now but a mockery and derision of 
 his former greatness, trail like a drooping banner over 
 his shoulder ! 
 
 Some may be even worse off" still, if that is possible, 
 than having to come back thus shorn of half their 
 glory, and never come back at all ! Horses, vehicle, 
 " noble whip," with all those gallant souls who trusted
 
 SIG TRANSIT GLORIA MUNDl! 71 
 
 to his skill, gone none know's where ; reduced into 
 their primitive atoms, having been violently run into 
 indorsely or collaterally by some heavier and more 
 potent vehicle. How many have thus been compelled 
 to leave their wrecked and scattered remains by the 
 way-side, shunted off into ditches, to become the prey 
 of gipseys or other freebooting wanderers, who will 
 have carried all off piece-meal before morning. 
 
 Happy, indeed, if some, at least, of those whose 
 absence is already, or very soon will be, causing no 
 small trepidation in their respective domestic circles, 
 and as the hours grow later, giving rise to the most 
 direful speculations and anxieties, not to speak of 
 hysteric palpitations in the tender bosoms of their 
 watching and expectant wives and families. Happy, 
 indeed, if they have not some of them fallen into the 
 hands of the stern myrmidons of the law, and are 
 this night expiating their offences in some one of her 
 Majesty's metropolitan or suburban police stations 
 — some trifling difference of opinion having perhaps 
 unhappily arisen between some of their jovial party 
 and the officials, which may have led to an exasperated 
 " noble" cutting the latter over the ears with his whip ; 
 or his companions, if not strictly in arms, certainly in 
 liquor, having perhaps pelted them with wine bottles, 
 whistling shells, or other playful missiles nearest at
 
 72 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 hand; which indiscretion has resulted in the whole set 
 
 of them having been led away by overwhelming forces 
 
 to the 
 
 " Drear depths of dungeons deep," 
 
 while their equipage has become the spoil of the 
 avenger. 
 
 Who can, or indeed does any one, care to tell for 
 certain what becomes of all the victims of all those 
 casualties familiarly known as " smashes," caused by 
 wheels coming off, splinter bars and poles breaking, 
 flies overturning, donkey carts upsetting, in short, the 
 thousand and one accidents which on every recurring 
 Derby-day are wont to strew the roads with broken 
 bones, broken necks, broken heads, and broken-up 
 people of all sorts and sizes, giving the neighbourhood 
 of — let us take for instance as a central spot the Cock 
 at Sutton — more the appearance of a battle field than of 
 a peaceful house of entertainment ? Do the parish 
 registers of that, at other times, retired village exhibit 
 any particular increase of average in their burial records 
 at this particular season of the year ? Or have they 
 perbaps a large grave prepared beforehand in the 
 garden behind that famous hostelry, where the corpses 
 are buried at once as they are brought in, and no 
 more said about them ? 
 
 Out upon such ghastly thoughts, and change the
 
 SIC TRANSIT GLORIA MUNDI I 73 
 
 theme, for — look below and see — barouches full of 
 beautiful ladies ; bless their pretty bonnets I for we 
 cannot see their faces from up here where we 
 are, all white muslin and blue ribbons, and for all we 
 can make out to the contrary by this light, all as fresh 
 and beautiful as when they started. 
 
 Mark those great flapping hampers, insecurely 
 hanging on behind ; how suggestive of Belshazzeric 
 banquets on the Course ? and who does not envy those 
 happy fellows with them, who have been brought 
 back occupying the privileged place of bodkin though 
 nearly smothered in the midst of their furbelows, 
 while two more perhaps who, we may be certain, never 
 ■were allowed to go down like that, return seated in 
 the folds of the carriage hood behind. 
 
 Their postilions may well be, as they seem, proud of 
 such a freight, cracking their whips and shouting as 
 they dash quite regardless of consequences amongst 
 the great elephantine vans full of jolly holiday folk, 
 gorgeous with bright colours, green branches and 
 brilliant handkerchiefs displayed on sticks, like flags 
 of victory. 
 
 Bang they go, now on this, now on the other side, 
 against reckless Hansoms, whose drivers always will 
 insist upon their right of cutting in first everywhere, 
 over the kerb-stone or even the foot pavement. They
 
 74 MELCHIOR GOBIES. 
 
 would drive up door-steps if they happened to come in 
 their way, it is all the same to them. 
 
 More barouches, more four-in-hands, more vans, 
 tax carts, gigs, and phaetons; and then comes a lot 
 who really ought to know better, than to have allowed 
 their livery servants on the box to sit with paste-board 
 noses and sham moustaches, and those indecent dolls 
 again, stuck round their cockades ; and their postilions 
 with dilapidated hats, and faces the same colour as 
 their scarlet jackets were before they rolled in the 
 dusty road, as they evidently have done, both as drunk 
 as fiddlers, or lords, or any other individual characters 
 usually supposed to be in that reprehensible condition. 
 
 And so they go on; the whole hubbub of shouting, 
 whip cracking, panel smashing, laughing, chaffing, 
 swearing, and horn-blowing, toned together as it were* 
 and harmonized by the treble accompaniment of cheers 
 and yells of the little bare-footed boys, who feel it to 
 be their special duty to run and halloo, and tumble 
 head over heels, at the risk of their lives among the 
 crowded horses and carriages, for apparently no earthly 
 object or reason, except the natural exuberance of 
 over-bursting spirits, and to show that even they claim 
 some share in the general enjoyment of the great 
 saturnalia of the British public. 
 
 " Hang me," said Lambfird, all of a sudden, " if this
 
 SIO TRANSIT GLORIA MUNDI! 75 
 
 is not enough to make a man a poet ! The sort of 
 mental effervescence and succession of changing im- 
 pressions which go on inside one, sj)ir'iiually I mean, 
 when looking down upon a bewildering scrimmage like 
 this, are, I believe, the workings of the genuine poetic 
 faculties of our nature, if one only knew how to set 
 about realizing them on to paper; or even a slate would 
 do perhaps better, as more easy to correct. Good, first- 
 rate rattling epics I mean. Would not old Homer have 
 set all the fun and row, mixed with trouble and sor- 
 rows, now going on below, into longs and shorts — no, 
 by the way, he wrote only in hexameters — and de- 
 sci'ibed every feeling and character of the crowd, just 
 as one could do it one's self if one could only find the 
 words. Not that I can pretend to have much culti- 
 vated that gentleman's acquaintance since I left 
 school; but I have often thought I should have 
 better appreciated those great rolling verses of his, 
 if it had not been for the way they tried to inculcate his 
 beauties into one's head by the longest way round, as 
 they did. Anyhow, from what I do remember of him, 
 his was more my notion of real life and energy, and 
 strugghng spirits too big for their mortal bodies, and 
 in fact general " go," than all that namby-pamby stuff 
 written now-a-days by fellows who get away into re- 
 tired holes in the lake countries, or up trees, I should
 
 76 MELCHIOR GOJRLES. 
 
 say, or mountains in Wales, more I believe because 
 milk and eggs are cheaper there than from any other 
 particular love of nature, -which is what they always 
 try to gain the credit for. The fact is, I sometimes 
 cannot help thinking that if I did not happen to have 
 grown into such a great hulking strong animal as I am, 
 and so have been obliged to work off my over-charged 
 animal spirits by rowing, mountain climbing, lion 
 shooting, and plenty of hard exercise, T should not 
 have minded taking up the poetic line of business 
 myself. Well, sir, what is there to grin at ? But 
 you are just as you always were atschool, an impudent 
 little beggar." He went on half-laughing, as I could 
 tell by his voice, half-inclined to be angry — " Well, 
 you may snigger, but I feel something within me, 
 quite an indefinite sort of feeling, you know, that 
 sometimes tells me that if I could by practice only get 
 over the difficulties of the metre, and manage the 
 rhymes a bit better than I know I as yet can, I often 
 catch floating in my mind lots of stunning ideas which 
 some of your regular verse-mongers would be glad to 
 give their ears for ; and as to metre and rhyme, why 
 some of the crack poets of the present day do not feel 
 themselves the least bound by such old-fashioned 
 notions, nor are over particular as to sense or matter 
 either, if you come to that ; though I must confess that
 
 SIC TRANSIT GLORIA MUNDI I 77 
 
 that is a school which I do not feel myself worthy of 
 uoderstandiug, nor therefore capable of appreciating. 
 
 " But I never should be surprised if I some fine day 
 got up, like, who was it ? and found myself a famous 
 poet, without knowing it." 
 
 It was too dark to see by Lambard's face whether he 
 was really in earnest or not in this quite unexpected and 
 bold assertion ; to tell the truth, I do not think he would 
 have been quite able to settle that point himself. But 
 after having thus confidently announced these cer- 
 tainly rather bombastic anticipations of future literary 
 fame, he remained for another ten minutes or so 
 silently ruminating thereon and then, rather abruptly, 
 delivered himself of, as I suppose, the result of his 
 own reflections, in the simple, but very expressive 
 dissyllable of " Bunkum !" 
 
 " Come," he broke out, " I thought you wanted to 
 know the rest of my story about Gorles, or what is all 
 to the same purpose, I want, and have made up my 
 mind to tell you ; so here goes ! " 
 
 Before my friend again takes up the thread of 
 this (to himself at least) very interesting, though as 
 it proceeds occasionally almost incredible narra- 
 tive, I think that I may as well here {-par parenthese) 
 remark, that although I received from him the main 
 and general outline of his story that night, as we sat 
 
 \
 
 78 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 smoking together till all sorts of hours into next 
 morning, yet it must not be supposed that I can pre- 
 tend to have heard the whole of the facts as I shall 
 endeavour to narrate them — to use one of his own 
 poetic expressions, " Slick-on-end off," at that one 
 time. 
 
 On many subsequent occasions, for we were during 
 the rest of that summer thrown much more together 
 than we had ever been since our school-days, and find- 
 ing in me, I fancy, a listener worthy of the subject, I 
 had full opportunity of fitting in and filling out many 
 details and minor combinations of circumstances which 
 he would add from one time to another, sometimes 
 telling me something quite fresh, sometimes going over 
 
 ain what he might have told me before, not unfre- 
 quently in a somewhat new light, or form; then, again, 
 he would sometimes bring in selections from notes, or 
 scattered fragments from an irregular sort of diary he 
 had been by way of keeping, and insist upon my 
 arranging them into some corrected form. 
 
 I wish, by this sort of preface, out of place, to 
 explain that I have done my best to tell Frank Lam- 
 bard's " round, unvarnished tale," such as it is, as 
 much as possible in his own style and words, without 
 again having to break ofi*, with the many interruptions 
 and interpolations, as they really occurred, thus
 
 SIC TRANSIT GLORIA MUNDI! 79 
 
 avoiding the very tiresome example of that eloquent 
 
 lady, the Princess wasn't she? or Sultana for the 
 
 time being, Scheherazade, in the Arabian Nights, who, 
 by the way, must have been quite as strong-minded a 
 specimen of woman-kind as she was beautiful, self- 
 devoting, and loquacious. A most rare combination 
 of qualities ! 
 
 Think what her feelings must have been when, find- 
 ing herself well into the full swing of one of her very 
 best stories, she saw the first gleam of morning light 
 insinuating itself through the shutter cracks ; and had 
 to pull up short ! 
 
 In these days could there be found one of her lovely 
 sex who, with so much to tell and such natural gifts 
 for telling it, could even under the same circumstances 
 (which in her case were certainly unusually pressing) 
 possibly, think you, be willing or able to exercise a 
 like control over her tongue ? or let us rather express 
 it as her brilliant powers of narration ; it must have 
 been indeed a trial, and so far all the more worthy 
 of our sincere admiration ; and in her particular case 
 the practice may therefore perhaps be deemed ex- 
 cusable, though tiresome to a degree, and certainly 
 not to be followed as an example.
 
 80 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTEK VII. 
 
 " SHOULD OLD ACQUAINTANCE BE FORGOT ?" 
 
 " So here goes !" — was liambard's re-introduction of 
 the subject; the first fytte, if I may so call it, he 
 had brought to a close on our arrival at the Kingston 
 Station in the morning. 
 
 " With the exception of the twice I have mentioned 
 of Gorles, mine enemy, turning up again at Eton, 
 •which two occasions were indeed within a very short 
 time of each other, I was no more haunted by the in- 
 fluence of the little wretch during my stay at that 
 * Seminary of useful learning,' as the old Provost 
 used to call it; don't you remember, in that long pala- 
 ver before giving out the text of his sermon ? — nor, 
 indeed, for two or three years did we at all run against 
 one another. 
 
 For by my going up to Cambridge, whereas the 
 " opposition shop" had the honour of conferring a de- 
 gree upon Gorles, our starts in life seemed, as I am 
 sure I was only too glad to think, destined to branch
 
 "SHOULD OLD ACQUAINTANCE BE FORGOT V 81 
 
 oflf into separate directions, without much chance of 
 crossing. 
 
 I have though, by the way, a vague idea that he 
 had something to do with that wherry which, perhaps 
 you, if you were there that day, may remember, con- 
 trived so nearly to get in the way of our boat, and as 
 close as a toucher lost us the University race at 
 Mortlake, the year I pulled in that eight. 
 
 It may have been only imagination, for I didn't see 
 him, it is true ; I was too excited to see anything ; but I 
 certainly had the shrill pipe of his cracked voice in my 
 ears at that moment, cheering on the Oxford men; 
 that, of course, he was quite right to do, if he had 
 only minded his rudder, instead of allowing the boat 
 he was steering to drift out from the bank almost 
 under our very bows. 
 
 It may have been so, or was perhaps only my fancy ; 
 but bar that, I was quite free of him, and for four or 
 five years had, I may say, nearly forgotten the exist- 
 ence of my abhorrence until having, with every satis- 
 faction and credit, to myself at least (though, 
 perhaps, I says it as shouldn't), pulled successfully 
 through a PoiZ-degree at Cambridge, I went in the 
 course of the following year to settle for a few 
 months at Dresden, by way of acquiring the speciallv 
 throat excoriating language in which the natives in 
 VOL. I. G
 
 82 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 those parts convey their muddle-headed ideas to one 
 another. 
 
 It makes the back of my mouth feel sore and rough 
 now, while I think of it. 
 
 I had at that time some relations living there : a 
 step-sister of my own mother's, who was married to a 
 colonel, a widower, with one daughter by his previous 
 marriage, besides whom there was also one child, a 
 boy, of her own. I knew so much, but had never seen 
 them since I was quite a child, as ever since my Uncle 
 Delorme had retired on half-pay, soon after his second 
 marriage, they had, like many other English, settled 
 abroad, partly from motives of economy, as well as for 
 the education of their children. 
 
 Nothing could have been kinder than the warm 
 and affectionate greeting which I received, immediately 
 on my presenting myself with letters and full creden- 
 tials from my mother, who had previously communi- 
 cated my intention of turning up in that direction 
 some day. 
 
 " Oh ! we are so sorry you did not come here last 
 week," said my aunt; "was it not too provoking, 
 Katie, that Frank did not come ? An old school- 
 fellow, and such a great friend of yours, was staying 
 here ; indeed, it was through your name that we made 
 his acquaintance."
 
 "SHOULD OLD ACQUAINTANCE BE FORGOT t" 83 
 
 *' Or, rather, lie made ours, mamma," said Miss 
 Katie, rather demurely. 
 
 "Well, no matter; we were in the royal picture- 
 gallery one morning, when he offered us the use of his 
 catalogue, and then asked, most politely, whether we 
 had lately heard anything of you or your family, as, 
 heing such an intimate friend, and auxious to hear 
 of you, he could not resist venturing ou the liberty,, 
 as he called it of addressing us. And so, having 
 thus begun an acquaintance, we saw a great deal of 
 him ; indeed, if he had not been such a very old 
 friend of yours, and therefore feeling bound to 
 welcome him, we might have perhaps almost begun to 
 think too much : — but there, he seemed to have such 
 domestic and affectionate dispositions ; and then, being 
 here, you see, all alone, he used to come in and see us 
 at all hours of the day, particularly at meal-times, be- 
 cause then, poor fellow, he was sure to Und us at 
 home ; but he would sit on so late of an evening, 
 that your uncle, who is, you know, rather an invalid, 
 and fond of early hours, began, perhaps, sometimes to^ 
 get just a little tired of him; but then, he used to 
 talk so much and so constantly about you, and all 
 your doings and sayings, that we did not like to be 
 cold or uncivil to him. The provoking thing was, 
 that the day after we had received your dear mother's 
 
 G 2
 
 84 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 letter, announcing your intention of coming out to 
 this place, he came to tell us that, deeply as he re- 
 gretted, and felt the great disappointment of missing 
 you, he had just received a letter which would ohlige 
 him instantly to set out on most particular business, 
 for somewhere or other, Vienna I think it was he 
 said, or perhaps it was Venice; and so, to tell the 
 truth, he entirely spoilt a little scheme Katie and I 
 had begun to arrange, of bringing you together quite 
 unexpectedly, and so witnessing and enjoying the 
 delightful surprise it would have been for you to dis- 
 cover so old and dear a friend. It would have been 
 quite the subject for a tableau, or the crowning inci- 
 dent of a magazine story." 
 
 "But what was his name ?" I very naturally in- 
 quired, when I at last could manage to get in a word 
 edgeways, for to tell the truth, my dear aunt, though 
 the best of women — at least, at that time I thought 
 her so — was a regular * oner' to talk when she once 
 got off with a fair start. ' But what was the name of 
 this dearest friend of mine ?' And in my mind I be- 
 gan to run over a list of all my old friends, of all times 
 and places ; amongst others your own occurred to me, 
 my dear little 'un, though, believe me, I gave you 
 instantly credit for too much tact to have bored them 
 ■with your company, sir, which any one could see had
 
 "SHOULD OLD ACQUAINTANCE BE FORGOTV 85 
 
 been the case witli this dear friend, whoever he might 
 be, in spite of my aunt's good-natured way of put- 
 ting it. 
 
 But then, on the other hand, my uncle's pretty 
 daughter, the phimp, bright-eyed little Katie, regular 
 little screamer as she was, then just turned eighteen, 
 and who valsed like an angel, would have been a fair 
 excuse for any man for rather trespassing on their kind- 
 ness, in doing his best to get as much of the tame 
 cat's place in the chimney-corner, and of her merry 
 company, as he could contrive to secure for him- 
 self. 
 
 "But who on earth, then," I asked, " could this 
 dearest friend of mine be?" 
 
 " Guess, now," says my aunt ; ** we will give you 
 three guesses," she went on, in that very provoking 
 way that womankind often have of delighting in any 
 trumpery mystification. 
 
 " Katie, try to describe him !" but I noticed that 
 Katie did not at all seem to enter into the spirit of her 
 step-mother's jokes, who, heaven forgive me for my im- 
 patience, I could not help thinking at the time was 
 quite old enough to have known better. But Katie, 
 strongly urged, undertook to give me a clue. 
 
 "Tall, broad shouldered, very fair, frank, open 
 countenance, loud, deeply-toned voice, blunt, and frco
 
 86 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 spoken — there, now cannot you guess ? or, perhaps, 
 it may he easier if I tell you to treat my accurate de- 
 scription like a dream, and take it just exactly hy 
 contraries." 
 
 Even then it did not dawn upon me ; but when, at 
 that moment, my uncle, who had come in, began to 
 say something about my ill luck in missing my friend 
 Gorles, you may, I am sure, quite imagine that, as our 
 old school saying was, the * fat was in the fire,' and 
 no mistake ! 
 
 Only think of the creature introducing and insinu- 
 ating himself into the family circle of my relatives, 
 who were, at that time, the very centre of the plea- 
 santest small society of the English in Dresden, on 
 the strength of his love and long-standing intimacy 
 with myself, of all people in the world ! 
 
 And what, if possible, provoked me even more 
 specially was, that never having, as T have told you, 
 seen or known me personally, my belongings had 
 rather begun to draw an imaginary portrait of myself, 
 their unsuspecting kinsman, judging of what my 
 opinions, general views, and dispositions would be 
 likely to be, from those of my supposed most intimate 
 friend. 
 
 But when enlightened as to the plain truth, and 
 they came fairly to speak out their real feelings, I
 
 "SHOULD OLD ACQUAINTANCE BE FORGOT r 87 
 
 soon began to perceive that, although he certainly- 
 had, iu spite of themselves, almost established an 
 intimacy with them, yet the more they had come to 
 know the less they had grown to like him. 
 
 It was in the course of subsequent confidential con- 
 versations that Katie herself confessed to me that 
 she had not looked forward with much pleasure to 
 my arrival, because, to say the truth, she had thought 
 I should be like my best friend, Mr. Gorles ; and to 
 him, for certain reasons, which I did not fully learn 
 till some time later, she had, from the very first, taken 
 a most mortal aversion. 
 
 Indeed, having made me promise not to tell my 
 uncle or aunt, she went on so far as to own that she 
 was absolutely afraid of him, and though she had 
 always constrained herself to appear civil and friendly 
 towards him, yet in her heart she quite dreaded the 
 very sight of him. 
 
 And at last, by Jove ! she one day let out, not with- 
 out much hesitation and heating about the bush, 
 that her little brother Ferdy, a speckle-faced, most 
 impudent young jackanapes of about twelve — you 
 have seen him, by the way, our young sporting com- 
 panion in the railway-carriage — had teased and tor- 
 mented her to let him have a lock of her hair, to put 
 into a locket which his mother had bought for him,
 
 88 MELCHIOR GORLES, 
 
 which same lock, as she had discovered, he had sold 
 to Gorles for a thaler. 
 
 The poor girl had been afraid, she declared — that 
 she could not tell exactly why — but that a sort 
 of terror of some invisible danger restrained her 
 from telling her parents, as of course she ought to 
 have done immediately, and so the opportunity had 
 passed by. 
 
 But ever since he had thus obtained that hair, she 
 could not help fancying that he held a special power 
 over her, and she shrunk from and dreaded him 
 accordingly. 
 
 He had had the impudence to show her a large 
 jewelled locket, in which he had invested, slung to 
 his watch chain, containing hair, which, though 
 morally convinced as she was that it was some of her 
 own, she of course could not condescend to acknow- 
 ledge, but was disgusted beyond measure to hear him 
 declare that it was dearer and more valuable to him 
 than his life, and boast how it would always give him 
 an unbounded influence over the mind, and thoughts, 
 and even actions of the person to whom it had origi- 
 nally belonged. 
 
 "And then," she innocently added; "he stared up 
 so hard, right into my eyes, as he was always doing, 
 you know; and whenever he shook hands with
 
 "SHOULD OLD ACQUAINTANCE BE FORGOT V 89 
 
 me, he would hold mine so tightly in his nasty, 
 little hot grasp for ever so long, and always contrive 
 to take a place close to me, even following me about 
 the room, if I tried to move away from him." 
 
 "And over poor Ferdy too, of whom he, for some 
 time after making our acquaintance, took immense 
 notice, he seemed somehow to have gained the same 
 strange sort of power. You can have no notion how 
 altered and changed that boy has become from what 
 he was — moping about and miserable, he seems at 
 times as if he had something quite dreadful on his 
 conscience ; it really makes me glad when, as if by 
 fits, he recovers his own character for mischief and 
 impudent tricks ; and though I was, of course, dread- 
 fully angry witli him for his wickedness, in making 
 over that piece of my hair, which he had obtained so 
 slily, yet I cannot help believing his solemn assertion, 
 that though he could give no reason, yet that he was 
 obliged and bound to do what Mr. Gorles ordered, and 
 that he really could not help himself: in short," she 
 continued, " the very thoughts of him terrify me, and 
 I perfectly hate him, and had quite made up my 
 mind to hate you too, you dearest old Frank " — at 
 least (correcting himself), perhaps she may not have 
 said quite that exactly, you know — not that there 
 would have been any harm if she had, though ; for.
 
 90 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 although we were not actually first cousins, we had 
 from the first agreed to consider each other in that 
 relationship, which soon placed us on the same foot- 
 ing as though we had really heen so in fact.
 
 91 
 
 CHAPTER VIII. 
 
 CONFIDENTIAL COMMUNICATIONS. 
 
 It was not, yoa must understand, all at once that I 
 received these and similar confidences from dear little 
 Katie, but bit by bit at different times. 
 
 Allowed as I was to spend as much of my time as I 
 liked in my uncle's house, she and I soon became as 
 intimate and friendly towards one another as cousins 
 should be. 
 
 We had agreed to read a portion of Schiller or 
 Goethe together every morning, and there was a strict 
 rule that Katie was to talk to me in nothing but 
 German, which rule was observed for perhaps an 
 average of five minutes per diem. There was also, I 
 remember, a very tough exercise of Ollendorff s, which 
 alone took an average of a couple of hours every 
 morning, for at least a week, in correcting ; so anxious 
 and earnest was my pretty instructress in thoroughly 
 grounding me in the language. 
 
 When I first heard from her of that interesting
 
 92 MELCUIOR GORLES. 
 
 episode of the lock, not "raped" exactly, like Pope's, 
 but sneakingly obtained under false pretences, I 
 was eager and ready to start off that instant for 
 Vienna, or wherever I could catch the little wretch, 
 to take the precious locket from his hateful possession, 
 and wring his villanous little neck for him into the 
 bargain. 
 
 But poor Katie begged and prayed, and cried so 
 touchingly, that I would take no steps of the sort, 
 evidently under a feeling of more than common excite- 
 ment and fears of the strange and supernatural powers 
 of ill which she fully believed that Gorles held over 
 her, and would certainly exercise in the event of such 
 an attack upon him as I proposed, that I was forced 
 to yield ; and though I tried my best to combat these 
 ideas in her, remembering as I did my own old school- 
 boy feelings and terrors, I could not but be conscious 
 of sympathizing in them, more than I at all allowed 
 my fair confidante to suspect. 
 
 I told her what was the right thing to do, most 
 strongly urging her to confide in, and seek counsel 
 from, her parents, and to tell them fairly all that she 
 had thus told me. 
 
 But nothing I had to say or urge could induce her 
 to do so, for besides the sort of fearful spell to which 
 she confessed herself subject, she also argued, not
 
 CONFIDENTIAL COMMUNICATIONS. 93 
 
 perhaps without reason, that they woukl only hmgh at 
 or scold her as absurd, and call her romantic or fan- 
 tastical ; and, though she had almost from the very 
 first felt an unaccountable antipathy for Gorles, that 
 with her father and step-mother he was really rather a 
 favourite than not. 
 
 In that opinion my own observations afterwards 
 rather led me to think that Katie was mistaken, 
 though, no doubt, he had, cunning as he was, for a 
 time at least, contrived to what you may call " get 
 round t'other side of both of them." 
 
 My aunt, you see, for whom I then, until I knew 
 her better, cherished a great respect, had, as I think I 
 have before hinted, more than usually gifted powers 
 of the " Gab ;" I beg her pardon, I ought, I suppose, 
 more dutifully to express it as a redundant volubility 
 of conversation. 
 
 Well, it all means the same ; but with the well- 
 established law of nature which abhors a vacuum, it 
 is not to be wondered at, that to be able as she was to 
 talk sixteen to the dozen on any conceivable subject 
 which might happen to be uppermost in her active 
 mind, she must needs have a corresponding aptitude, 
 not to say necessity, for taking in, and from all sorts 
 of sources increasing her store of ideas, combining 
 facts with fancies, and sometimes fictions, about
 
 94 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 X^eople, places, and things in general, to keep up the 
 supply of material which the unwearied activity of her 
 tongue was perpetually exhausting. In short, to 
 express it in plain prose, Mrs. Delorme, like a good 
 many gentlewomen of her time of life, did dearly love 
 gossip, in the full indulgence of which propensity 
 there is always, of course, the double gratification of 
 receiving as well as imparting. 
 
 Now of gossip, not to say scandal occasionally, 
 which, like so many other little things in this world, is 
 none the less pleasant for being wrong, Gorles, it 
 seems, having very soon discovered her weak side, 
 contrived to have plenty at her service, not only about 
 the concerns of people in the world whom he did 
 happen to know, but also including a larger class of 
 those he did not know, but about whom he was, never- 
 theless, always ready with a great deal of second-hand 
 information. 
 
 When folks have happened to live abroad for any 
 time, you may perhaps yourself have observed, how 
 greedy they will become of what they call " news " of 
 their English friends, and what immense interest they 
 will seem to take in the private affairs of former neigh- 
 bours and acquaintances, sometimes to the most 
 absurdly minute details. 
 
 The Colonel, too, for his part, had likewise, I per-
 
 CONFIDENTIAL COMMUNICATIONS. 95 
 
 ceived, for some time at least, looked with favour upon 
 this supposed friend of mine, perhaps a little influ- 
 enced, I suspect, by the fact of no one else happening 
 to be in the way just at that time who could play 
 so good a hand at picquet in the evenings, at which, 
 and indeed^ almost all other games of cards, Gorles 
 had from his youth up been always a particularly 
 artful dodger. 
 
 And so for a certain time, as I say, he had rather 
 encouraged and appreciated the little sinner's com- 
 pany, though latterly, just before he had departed, 
 my uncle had begun to grumble, and grown somewhat 
 tired of his constant appearance, which he was begin- 
 ning to find rather too much of a good thing. 
 Although matters might not perhaps have come to an 
 upshot, unless, as it happened one day quite inci- 
 dentally, the little fiend had actually gone so far as 
 to assert that the affection and close friendship which 
 he always persisted in as existing between himself 
 and me, had originally commenced at Eton in conse- 
 quence of his, Gorles's — oh, ye gods above, around, 
 and below ! fancy such barefaced audacity ! Gorles's 
 having been mainly instrumental in getting me out of 
 an ugly scrape about some money that had been 
 missed, and that but for his special intervention, he 
 declared I must certainly have been expelled.
 
 96 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 That most audacious and unwarrantable assertion, 
 though my uncle could of course at the time have no 
 idea of its peculiar atrocity, had, as far as I could make 
 out, given the finishing turn to the old gentleman's 
 feelings in regard to him, and he had plainly spoken 
 out his mind to tlie eflfect that if there was the 
 slightest foundation for such a story, which nothing 
 should ever make him believe of the son of his old 
 friend and comrade, Lambard, whom he had known 
 and loved like a brother all his life, but even if it 
 were not a scandalous lie, as he felt quite certain it was, 
 that he could only remark, that after that the less 
 Gorles had to say on the subject of his intimate friend- 
 ship with his nephew the better it would be — if that 
 was his way of speaking of his friends, and raking up 
 old school stories and lies of that sort against them. 
 
 Angry enough my uncle must have been, as I could 
 see, when, as you may suppose, on hearing this re- 
 peated, I enlightened him as to the real truth, telling 
 him as I did the whole facts, chapter and verse, on 
 hearing which his rage exceeded all ordinary bounds ; 
 to that degree that when I went on to tell him about 
 the diabolical influence to which I had been subject, 
 and, in short, all I have told you, he seemed entirely to 
 lose all discrimination in his wrath — so stern, and quite 
 fierce were his tones and manner, when he abruptly
 
 CONFIDENTIAL COMMUNICATIONS. 97 
 
 desired me to " stop that," and never, as I valued 
 my own happiness, to tell, or even think of repeating 
 that story again to anybody, or on any occasion. 
 Nor have I ever done so until now — that is with the 
 e:j^ception of on an occasion which I shall tell you 
 presently. 
 
 And then, as the old gentleman cooled down, he, I 
 remember, looked at me so very oddly, with a half- 
 searching, half-pitying expression, and apropos to 
 nothing, except maybe to change the subject of con- 
 versation entirelv, asked me " whether I ever remem- 
 bered seeing, or anybody had ever mentioned my 
 grandfather to me ?" 
 
 I really began to think that the burning indigna- 
 tion of his wrath had suddenly been too much for his 
 brain, and that he was going daft on the spot. 
 
 Of Gorles's tricks, or audacious pretensions in re- 
 gard to his daughter Katie, I am sure the peppery old 
 fellow never had the slightest idea, or he would have 
 probably put a summary and effectual bar to any fur- 
 ther games of that sort, by pitching him straight out 
 of the nearest window then and there. 
 
 As to myself, he presently apologized for his 
 warmth ; but again most solemnly wuirned me against 
 ever repeating the strange story which had made him 
 so angry. He over and over again inquired earnestly 
 
 VOL. I. H
 
 98 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 whether I had ever spokeu on that subject to liis 
 daughter, which, as it happened, I never had, though 
 more than once it had been on the very tip of my 
 tongue. He then put it to me, upon my sacred honour, 
 as a gentleman, never to mention, or even allude to 
 the matter directly or indirectly to either of his chil- 
 dren, but more especially to Katie herself, 
 
 I willingly enough gave him my promise, and 
 the old gentleman, who, though he pretended so 
 thoroughly to pooh-pooh the whole idea, had, as I 
 could see, in his heart not thought so lightly of it, 
 seemed satisfied and relieved in his mind. 
 
 His manner became coi'dial as ever, and he took 
 that opportunity of confidentially acknowledging to 
 me that he also, just as Katie had done, had precon- 
 ceived rather a prejudice against me before my arrival, 
 and had wondered how any son of his old friend 
 "Bullfinch" Lambard, as they used to call my poor 
 father in the regiment, could possibly be such a chum, 
 and on such thick terms of intimacy, with that half- 
 bred little whipper-snapper Gorles.
 
 99 
 
 CHAPTER IX. 
 
 TOO GOOD TO LAST LONG. 
 
 You were pleased, I think, my young friend, to 
 grin somewhat sarcastically (to give no stronger term 
 to that breach of manners on your part) upon my 
 just now mentioning to you my earnest conviction — 
 that, if it were not for the length of ray limbs, and 
 the strength of my muscular development, and if, 
 perhaps, a rather more assiduous cultivation of the 
 Graclus ad Parnassum, or whatever the English equi- 
 valent to that most useful work may be, could have 
 been managed in the days of my youth. Nature had 
 originally three-quarters of a mind to make a poet of 
 me. 
 
 What will you say then, if, overlooking your disre- 
 spectful incredulity on that score, I now inform you 
 confidentially, that although I never set up to be, as 
 of course I know I never was, much of a scholar, yet 
 that if I, or rather my pastors and masters, whose duty 
 it was to have discovered the natural bias of my mind, 
 
 H 2
 
 100 MELCmOR GORLES. 
 
 and to have trained it accordingly when young and 
 ductile, had only luckily hit upon the right clue, I 
 feel convinced that my best chance of an illustrious 
 career would have been to have devoted myself to the 
 abstruser studies of psychology, and the general philo- 
 sophies of human nature ; who knows, but I might 
 have attained rank among some of the greatest 
 theoretical, if not practical, philosophers of these 
 philosophic times. 
 
 What, are you at it again ? It is no use pre- 
 tending to drink, for there is nothing left in your 
 tumbler, and I can hear the edge of the glass jingling 
 against your teeth. Well, laugh and snigger if you 
 must, but don't choke yourself, that's not worth 
 while. 
 
 Yes, though perhaps if never destined to be a poet, 
 I sometimes feel that the other chance of becominsf 
 illustrious is not altogether out of the question. 
 
 Though by no means habitually, yet occasionally, I 
 indulge in profound reflections on profound subjects ; 
 and sitting down late one night to my writing table, 
 determined before I retired to rest to embody and 
 arrange in some tangible form some ideas of things in 
 general, which had in the course of the day been float- 
 ing through my mind, suddenly — more, I own, by 
 chance or instinct than by any progressive train of
 
 TOO GOOD TO LAST LONG. 101' 
 
 thought — I in a moment hit upon, and found myself 
 to be the accidental discoverer of one of those great 
 secrets of nature's laws which, with proper elucidation 
 by any one who was used to that sort of thing, would, 
 I feel convinced, prove of the greatest value to science, 
 and will hereafter be generally acknowledged and 
 become reduced to a recognised system, just as the 
 discovery of the centre of gravity was by Newton 
 himself. 
 
 Now, while mentioning that most eminent name, I 
 cannot refrain from remarking between ourselves that, 
 whatever he may have deserved on all other points, I 
 never can help thinking tiiat he gained a great deal ■ 
 more Kvcoq than he had any right to on the score 
 of that tumbling apple. ■ 
 
 If it was I'ipe, as I suppose it must have been, when 
 the stalk could hold it no longer, why, of course, it 
 gave way and down it fell. Any one else but such a 
 dunder-headed old Don as he must have been would 
 have picked it up and ate it, and thought no more 
 about it, unless it had happened to disagree with him 
 afterwards ; but at any rate he should have known 
 that it was nothing new for apples to tumble when 
 their stalk ceases to be strong enough to hold them, 
 instead of tlying up into the air like a soap bubble, as he 
 certainly seemed to have expected; and there, I grant.
 
 102 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 if it had done so, might have been something to 
 speculate and wonder about. 
 
 But as it turned out that upon the observation of 
 that simple and most common place incident one of the 
 most important principles of creation was discovered 
 by the great Sir Isaac, so it was that I, by a rather 
 slovenly trick I have, when in deep thought, as sud- 
 denly hit upon the secret on which, quite equally to 
 that of gravity in the physical world, the whole 
 spiritual ecoiiomy of human nature centres and depends 
 — namely, the as yet, that is, till as I tell you, it 
 was revealed to myself, undiscovered Principle of 
 Contraries. 
 
 Why is it, I, all of a moment, asked myself, an 
 undoubted and immutable fact, that when I kick my 
 slippers off under the table, and then try to fish them 
 back again with my toes, that my left toe invariably 
 finds its way into the right foot slipper, and the right 
 toe vice versa ? 
 
 Is it not always so ? In every common act and in- 
 cident of life does not that principle of contraries apply ? 
 Is it not universally allowed to be the exception, if it 
 does not rain when any particularly pleasant pic-nic 
 or out-door party has been arranged, or any review or 
 public holiday for the enjoyment of which fine weather 
 is essential ?
 
 TOO GOOD TO LAST LONG. 103 
 
 Did you or anybody ever want to buy a horse, a 
 yacht, or first-rate dog, or in short anything of that 
 sort for which you may have been on the look for weeks 
 in vain, and having at last paid more than you meant 
 to do for probably even then not quite the thing you 
 wanted, is it not by an invariable law of circumstances 
 that you, within two or three days after your 
 unsatisfactory purchase, meet with exactly the very 
 animal, or whatever the object in request may happen 
 to be, at half the price ? 
 
 Is that chance ? Bah ! Is it not always so ? Quite 
 as immutable a certainty as that an apple will always 
 tumble down when it cannot stay up any longer. I 
 could furnish you with a thousand more familiar in- 
 stances of the same principle from simple every-day 
 incidents of life. 
 
 Working out, then, this great theory with all its 
 ramifications and consequences in my mind, I have 
 been brought to observe one special rule and axiom, 
 which is, that if in the course of this life, as it is at 
 present constituted, we poor mortals at any particular 
 moment become — (unhappily for ourselves, though of 
 course at the time it seems precisely the reverse) — con- 
 scious of present perfect enjoyment and contentment ; 
 either in, let us say, the attainment of any long-desired 
 object; the opening of any new career which promises
 
 104 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 certain success ; the riddance or escape from any par- 
 ticular annoyance or trial of life ; the reciprocal 
 affection and attachment to some other being, which 
 is no doubt the most delicious feeling of which the 
 human mind is capable, or, in short, any other of the 
 undoubted sources of human happiness, I do not say, 
 mind, but that the pleasure may endure for some time 
 unrecognised, and that when it is past and gone, one 
 may on looking back feel satisfied at having experi-. 
 enced comparatively lasting periods of great enjoyment 
 and bliss ; but by the strict rule of contraries, the 
 instant the consciousness of such satisfaction, being 
 actually present, becomes quickened within us, and 
 one's soul is, so to speak, indiscreet enough to con- 
 gratulate its owner on its then enviable lot — presto ! — 
 it is gone — I do not pretend to explain where or 
 wherefore, I only stick to the fact that it is invariably 
 the case. 
 
 The same instant that happiness in any human 
 being has arrived at the point of being felt and 
 recognised, wdiile it is actually being enjoyed, so 
 sure may the adverse turn be known to be close at 
 hand. 
 
 An immediate re-action of proportionate unhappi- 
 xess and disappointment is inevitable, by just as cer-
 
 TOO GOOD TO LAST LONG. 105 
 
 tain a law of nature as that night will succeed clay, 
 or that the tide will begin to ebb as soon as the last 
 point of high water-mark has been reached. 
 
 Now the particular application of these undoubted 
 scientific truths to my own story is, that if I had only 
 known, in those days, all that by my own thought 
 and experience I have since discovered and digested, 
 I should probably not have enjoyed those thrice happy 
 days at Dresden as I did. No, no, ray dear fellow, I 
 should have known, from the very fact of being jolly 
 as I was, that breakers were close a-head, and so, 
 instead of entirely enjoying myself, been keeping one 
 eye " looking out for squalls." 
 
 Jolly I certainly was while it lasted ; "jolly as a 
 sand-boy," as the saying is, though, by the way, why 
 a sand-boy's lot should thus proverbially typify tlie 
 height of human joy, I do not know. I dout^ indeed, 
 know that I ever met a sand-boy personally ; and the 
 untimely fate of the only one I can remeuiber to have 
 heard of, in that imperishable romaunt of real life 
 familiar to us all — 
 
 " Who went and cut lils throat with a little piece of glass, 
 All for love of the Ratcatcher's daughter," 
 
 would rather seem to tell the other way. 
 
 Indeed how could I but be happy as the day was
 
 106 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 long ? I should have Hked those days to have stood 
 still, and remained for ever always just the same — 
 the most fatal of all symptoms ! and so, as you shall 
 hear, I found it.
 
 107 
 
 CHAPTER X. 
 
 HAPPY DAYS AT DRESDEN. 
 
 Well then, not to pursue further those abstruse sub- 
 jects, which, as I perceive, you think tiresome, being, 
 I suppose, beyond the depth of your unphilosophical 
 brain, let me briefly wind up the description of those 
 happy days, passed as I have ah'eady mentioned 
 almost entirely in the society of the bewitching little 
 Katie, who had adopted me, as I had her, into the 
 closest relationship of first cousin-hood. 
 
 Thoroughly established in my uncle's family as 
 " enfant de maison," although I continued my original 
 separate lodgings, I went in and out just as I liked, 
 always sure of a warm welcome when I made my 
 appearance ; and what is the real secret of making one 
 feel at home, they none of them ever pretended to 
 put themselves out in the slightest way for me, or to 
 make the least difi'erence in their daily occupations or 
 amusements in consequence either of my presence or 
 my absence. 
 
 I began after a bit to find that I was picking up a
 
 108 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 little of the language, to a certain amount at least, 
 and generally after passing my mornings at a fencing- 
 school, which I and some other fellows at a tutor's 
 there had instituted, or else pulling in an out- rigger 
 on the Elbe, to the great amazement of the natives, 
 my afternoons, or I might more properly say after- 
 early-dinners, were devoted to family excursions, down 
 to Saxon Switzerland, or Moritzberg, or Meissen, or 
 some of the many outlying places which have been 
 set down by the omniscient and despotic Murray in 
 his Handbook as " things to be done." 
 
 When not so far, what jolly walks and strolls I used 
 to have with my relatives under the avenues of the 
 Grosse Garten, or on the Briihl'sche Terrasse, enjoy- 
 ing the really pretty scenery, and the bands of music, 
 and the groups of happy folk sitting out under the 
 trees, with their children playing around them, as they 
 imbibed their al fresco refreshments ; all the while 
 groAving as I was every day more and more fond and 
 
 attached to my uncle and aunt, and all of 
 
 them. 
 
 Katie and I had, as time ran on, gradually fallen 
 into the recognised habit of getting off for these 
 delightful walks and evening strolls together alone, 
 without any opposition, or indeed, as far as we knew, 
 any remark on the part of the old birds.
 
 HA PP Y DA YS A T DRESDEN. 109 
 
 I believe it had at fii'st been supposed the correct 
 thing to send the small brother Ferdy out with us, bv 
 Avay of chaperon (or what is familiarly known by 
 "missy" young ladies as " daisypicker"), in com- 
 pliance with some not quite effaced compunctions 
 and notions of British propriety floating through my 
 aunt's matronly brain. 
 
 Master Ferdy was, as I think I have already told 
 you, a queer looking youug animal, with a face 
 covered with freckles, as if an over-ripe gooseberry 
 had been skilfully aimed at the centre of his pug-nose, 
 and the seeds squashed all over his expressive coun- 
 tenance ; by no means agreeable to look at, and par- 
 ticularly disagreeable iu his manners and customs, as 
 his species at that period of their existence are too 
 apt to be. 
 
 You never exactly knew where to have the creature, 
 alternating as he at different times seemed to do, in 
 temper and character from the most audacious vivacity 
 and impudence, which I must say appeared to be his 
 normal state, to occasional fits of the lowest and 
 most morbid dismals, just as his sister had one day 
 described to me, as if he were quite overwhelmed by 
 the consciousness of some tremendous crime or secret. 
 
 I do not know that I should have particularly no- 
 ticed, or at least given a second thought to the fickle
 
 110 MELCHIOR OORLES. 
 
 eccentricities of that infant mind, beyond perhaps 
 thinking it odd that one of his tender years should 
 have so precociously fallen out with and succumbed 
 to his own liver, as I supposed was the case, were it 
 not from Katie's having remarked it to me, as she had, 
 as something new and unusual, as well as having it 
 afterwards recalled to my mind, when, as I shall tellyou, 
 I came to hear the flibbertygibbet's own account of 
 the cause of his griefs and remorseful pangs. 
 
 At that time, however, whether vivacious or in the 
 dumps, we of course voted him a nuisance and a bore, 
 so I used to dismiss him to his own devices with a 
 friendly application of my toe ; and I may say that he, 
 on his part, seemed quite as little to care for or ap- 
 preciate the pleasure of our company as we did his, 
 and so it came to pass, that though, for some time, it 
 was a sort of understood thing that we did not go 
 beyond the public walks of the Grosse Garten, or the 
 Terrasse, as the authorities had never, in so many words 
 said anything to the contrary, and, somehow, neither 
 of us had thought it worth while mentioning, we, on 
 one particularly beautiful afternoon, agreed to carry 
 out an expedition we had for some time before talked 
 of between ourselves, of clambering up to the top of 
 the Wolfshligel to see the sun set.
 
 Ill 
 
 CHAPTER XI. 
 
 SUNSET FROM THE WOLFSHUGEL. 
 
 The Wolfshiigel is an eminence, or, in plainer terms, 
 a great high mound, whether natural or artificial I 
 am not prepared to state, something between two and 
 three miles outside Dresden, on the Pillnitz Eoad, on 
 the other side of the river, from the city, having, I 
 believe, like most of those outlying places, some cock- 
 and-bull legend attached to it, which, if I ever heard, 
 I have forgotten, but have no doubt it may be found 
 in the pages of Murray's red-book, before alluded to. 
 
 Some hundred feet or so, more or less, high, its top 
 is accessible by an irregular sort of 'half-pathway, 
 half-rustic staircase. It is one of the favourite resorts, 
 in the summer time, for Dresden cockneys, who go 
 out there on fine Sunday afternoons, to enjoy them- 
 selves in the absorption of that muddy, nauseous 
 compound which they, poor, ignorant souls, imagine 
 to be, and call by the name of beer, while they con- 
 template the really fine panorama of their city below,
 
 112 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 with the Elbe flowing beneath its handsome stone 
 bridge far a foreground, and the well-shaped domes 
 and quaint old spires thrown out into full relief by the 
 sun setting behind them — as I daresay it was the 
 
 o 
 
 p 
 
 articular evening I remember so well. 
 
 'o 
 
 That evening there was, however, not another soul 
 in the place — we had it all to ourselves. It is a stiff- 
 ish pull up to the top, and I was obliged to hold 
 Katie's hand very tight, to haul her up the scrambling 
 way after me. 
 
 1 have said we were quite alone, but so we had been 
 many times before. It was a delicious evening, the 
 most deliciously soft blowing air I think I ever ex- 
 perienced. 
 
 We, somehow, had not been talking much the latter 
 part of our Avalk, though habitually, when we were to- 
 gether, we had so much to say to one another, that 
 my aunt used to declare that she never could find a 
 chance of getting in a single word when we two were 
 there. 
 
 Did you ever, by chance, at any scientific lecture 
 or institution, either from motives of curiosity, or 
 in the pursuit of useful information, try the effect of 
 a galvanic battery on your elbow-joints, or weakly 
 dip your hand into the water inhabited by an electric 
 eel?
 
 SUNSET FROM THE WOLFSHUGEL. 113 
 
 Well, it is not pleasant, or a sensation which most peo- 
 ple seem to care about trying more than once in their 
 lives ; and yet, if you have sufficient refinement of sensi- 
 bihty totake in and understand a comparison or simile, 
 by which an idea can be conveyed of how two feelings 
 can be precisely similar, and yet at the same time ex- 
 actly the reverse, then, perhaps, you may form some 
 notion of the exquisitely intense, though, at the same 
 time delightful sensation which suddenly shot through, 
 not only my elbow-joints, but my whole system, from 
 the dear little soft hand of Katie, held, as it was, 
 tightly in mine. 
 
 Gently, though intensely, and quite distinctly, I 
 felt an electric shock, like a solid bubble, pass, as if 
 from down through her arm and hand, into and up 
 through my own. I seemed momentarily conscious 
 of it in her before it had actually reached me, instant- 
 aneous as it was. 
 
 Why I felt that I did not dare look round at her 
 till we reached the top, I do not know, but such was 
 my thought, and I didn't. 
 
 It is only a great bare place, when you have got 
 there, with a few straggling furze bushes, and sand, 
 and an attempt at grass much trodden down by beer- 
 soaking German Sunday-outers. 
 
 When we were fairly landed, I did look into her face; 
 
 VOL. 1. I
 
 lU MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 Katie was blushing up to the very roots of her hair — 
 perhaps it was only the exertion of clambering up — 
 but she answered my look with a bright flash of light 
 from her eyes, which I felt go through and through 
 me like — like what, shall I say ? It was piercing, and 
 yet so soft and gentle, it was like a consolidated 
 sunbeam wrapped in velvet. 
 
 I longed to speak, and say something, though I 
 scarcely knew what, but it seemed beyond the power 
 of utterance. Just as I was conscious of the electric 
 vitality in her before it had reached me, so did she 
 seem intuitively conscious of what was working in my 
 brain, as if it had been her own. Before I could ex- 
 press or arrange my bubbling feelings into words, she 
 whispered to me deprecatingly, though without seem- 
 ing to move her lips, whicli were half open in a loving 
 smile — " Don't say it, Frank ; don't, please, tell me ; 
 let us go on as we have been ; if you only speak, our 
 happiness will vanish for ever." 
 
 And, by Jove, sir, she was right, for though so 
 YOung and fresh to life, she seemed, by instinct, 
 intuitively to feel that truth which it took ever so 
 much experience, and no end of after reflection, to 
 teach me. 
 
 I did speak, though I hardly knew at the time, and 
 could not tell now what it was I said.
 
 SUNSET FROM THE WOLFSHUGEL. Il5 
 
 But I wish to heaven I had obeyed her, and had 
 bitten my own tongue off at its root first. 
 
 But there, out it came in soDie sort of words or 
 broken sentences, an incoherent rush of — not exactly 
 sentimentality, for that is not in my line — but rhodo- 
 montade of some kind or another, having, perhaps, no 
 very precise meaning or connection in particular — 'not 
 that that mattered; therewas no needof any explanation 
 in the ease. By that flash of our eyes, and that touch 
 of our finger-ends, more than any words could ever 
 convey was understood between us in an instant. 
 
 In how long, or why we started to come down again 
 from the mound, I don't exactly know. 
 
 The sunset which we had climbed up on purpose to 
 see, was, I dare say, and have no reason to doubt, 
 that evening even more than usually magnificent ; 
 though, as it happens, I cannot call to mind its 
 having made the slightest impression upon me ; I 
 rather think that we stood hand-in-hand with our faces 
 turned towards the opposite side of the horizon. 
 
 That may be so ; I cannot tell ; I only do know that 
 I neither dropped on one knee as a hero in a novel or 
 a play does, and so I suppose I ought to have done, 
 nor smote my breast, nor covered the fair hand I held 
 with kisses. I was bending reverently towards her to 
 catch her faint whisper, and could almost fe^l her soft 
 
 i2
 
 116 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 breatli upon my cheek, when — blobb — came a great, 
 buzzing beetle, flying as those blundering beasts will 
 do, you know, looking one way while steering the 
 other, and, hitting me on the face with a slap which 
 made me start again, bounded off so hard that it 
 actually got itself entangled in Katie's hair, and there 
 hung buzzing with its nasty hind legs scratching her 
 darling little ear, until not without some difficulty 
 managed to extricate it. 
 
 I was thinking more of not hurting her, than I was 
 of the beetle, which, though as a rule I never can bear 
 to injure the smallest insect, I wish now I had trod 
 upon, and smashed upon the spot ! 
 
 But no sooner had I loosened it, than it was gone, 
 we could not tell where ; neither of us saw it fly off, 
 and the next instant, when we were looking every- 
 where about for it, on the ground and all around, it 
 was nowhere to be seen ; it was gone I 
 
 The same thought, ridiculous as I dare say you 
 will think it, at the same moment flashed through the 
 minds of both of us ; Katie with a shudder uttered the 
 name of Gorles ! as I at that very same instant ex- 
 claimed, " The little devil himself." 
 
 This anyhow brought us to our senses, and having 
 descended, we set out to make the best of our way 
 home, walking rather faster than usual, for we felt
 
 SUNSET FROM THE WOLFSHUGEL. 117 
 
 soraebow it would not do to be late. Side by side we 
 pusbed along, " bardly excbanging a word tbe wbole 
 way, except Katie once, witb a very deep sigb, spoke 
 more to berself tbau me, or perbaps seemed involun- 
 tarily to give utterance to ber inward tbougbts, as 
 suddenly sbe exclaimed, tbougb in a low voice, '' Ob, 
 I wisli be bad never spoken, fur now sometbing tells 
 me, we sball never be tbe same again ! " and again, 
 simultaneously — tbougb, in spite of myself — I could 
 bave almost felt angry witb tbe poor little girl for 
 uttering sucli an unlucky tbougbt — I felt conscious of 
 n similar presentiment of evil in my own beart as it 
 sbrunk up sensibly witbin me.
 
 118 MELCIIIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTEE XII. 
 
 OUT OF TIME, ALL TOGETHER. 
 
 I don't think we exchanged another word until, upon 
 the door step of her home, I took her hand again in 
 mine, and said *" Katie, am I to say anything to Uncle 
 George ?" 
 
 " Oh, Frank !" she answered, softly, " why couldn't 
 we have gone on together as we have heen ? So very, 
 very happy ; and now it is all shattered like a broken 
 glass ! all changed and lost, and I know some great 
 misfortune is goiug to happen to us ! " 
 
 She spoke quite passionately, almost in hitter anger 
 with myself I thought, and went in, and straight up to 
 her o^Yn room. 
 
 . I hesitated for a few minutes whether to walk in as 
 usual to tea or not, but I thought it would seem 
 strange if I didu't ; so, not without having to fortify 
 myself by counting ten slowly while twiddling with 
 the door handle, I presented myself, as I felt painfully 
 conscious, with an embarrassed and quite different air
 
 OUT OF TIME, ALL TOGETHER. 119 
 
 from that with which I had ever before entered that 
 same room, I was ahnost prepared to be cross-exa- 
 mined. I should not have been much surprised if I 
 had been " blown up " for going so far, and keeping 
 Katie out so late. 
 
 It was positively a relief when my uncle, waking up 
 from his evening snooze with a grunt, only said in 
 his usual kind, cheery tone of voice : " Halloa ! 
 Master Frank, is that you ? Well, now, I suppose, 
 Katie is come in, she will give us some tea." 
 
 But in a short time their maid or nurse, or what- 
 ever she called herself, came in'^to say that her young 
 lady felt a little over-tired with her walk, and having a 
 headache, would be glad if she might have her tea 
 sent into her own room. 
 
 So my aunt had to take her place at the tea-table; 
 and then how well I remember every trifling incident 
 of that weary evening ; my mind was on the stretch, 
 and I was yearning for Katie to come down again, 
 selfish beast as I felt I was, if it was only for me to 
 see her again for two minutes before I went away. 
 
 But the clock on the mantelpiece struck three when 
 it meant to say nine, which irregularity did not escape 
 my aunt's observation, and away she went on atangent^ 
 being quite convinced that it was the effect either of 
 cockroaches, or else mice getting into the works, which
 
 120 MELOHIOR GORLES. 
 
 opinion she first propounded, and tlien argued on 
 both sides, for and against, nobody contradicting her, 
 in a discourse on clocks and their contingencies, which 
 would, I should think, fill at least forty pages of very 
 close print; and then, unfortunately, something had 
 gone wrong with the cream, on which discovery, break- 
 ing off" abruptly at the fortieth page, or thereabouts, of 
 the by no means nearly concluded previous subject, 
 after testing the faulty delicacy by sniffing at it, cau- 
 tiously sipping, and then holding it up to the lamp for 
 minute ocular inspection, the good lady again broke 
 covert in full cry, favouring us with a most complete 
 disquisition upon the management of a dairy, and all 
 matters connected with its in-door, as well as out-door 
 economy ; ranging discursively over the various pecu- 
 liarities of pastures, meadow lands, butter cups, sweet 
 hay, oil cake, mangold-wurzel, and swedes ; freely 
 interspersing many self-answered doubts and enquiries, ^ 
 and propounding not a few, as I should think, entirely 
 new and somewhat startling facts connected with the 
 natural habits, tastes, sympathies, and antipathies of 
 cattle in general, not forgetting the several diseases, 
 complaints, and affections to whicli horned beasts are 
 liable, with some most original suggestions of her own 
 for special treatment in special cases ; indeed she was 
 just expressing her conviction that the cow which had
 
 OUT OF TIME, ALL TOGETHER. 121 
 
 supplied that particular jug of cream Avas suffering 
 from low spirits and dyspepsia, and only required 
 change of scene, when she suddenly discovered that 
 having given her husband his cup of tea she had 
 utterly forgotten to pour out any either for herself or 
 me, so entirely carried away had she been by the 
 earnestness of her discourse, the telling points of 
 which she had been impressively marking with raps 
 upon the table with her tea-spoon. It is very odd 
 that I should be able so distinctly to remember such 
 stuff as I do, for though it all went into my ears, at the 
 time my thoughts were occupied on a very different 
 subject. 
 
 The tea was all stone cold, and the clock again 
 striking four instead of ten, I rose to wish them good 
 night, for they kept early hours, and I knew there 
 was no chance after that of seeing Katie again that 
 evening. 
 
 And so I went home and to bed, but not to make 
 much of a sleep of it. Rapturously happy as some 
 few minutes of that day had been to me, I tossed 
 round and round all night with dreadfully dismal, 
 though at the same time quite indefinite forebodings 
 of evil close impending. 
 
 I felt that " I had put my foot in it," and dosing or 
 waking that horrible beast of a beetle kept haunting
 
 122 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 me-now dancing and .vliirling in all sorts of shapes 
 and different colours before my eyes, now buzzing to 
 all sorts of tunes round and round my ears, and then 
 it grew larger and larger, until I recognised the grin- 
 ning features of Gorles himself, whom you remember 
 I had not then set eyes upon for five or six years, and 
 he burst into a fit of laughing at me, and buzzed away. 
 Of course that may have been a dream, but my im- 
 pression is that I had not been asleep— any how, after 
 that I could stand it, or rather lie there no longer, so I 
 jumped up and went for an early bathe.
 
 123 
 
 CHAPTER XIII. 
 
 INGENUI VULTUS PUER, INGENUI QUE PUDORIS ! 
 
 In spite of my early turn out, it was not until towards 
 what seemed my usual hour, for fear of looking parti- 
 cular, that I found my way to Liittichau Strasse, which 
 was the name of the street where my relations lived, 
 longing, yet half dreading all the while to see Katie, 
 and wondering whether I should get her to come out 
 with me the same as ever. As I sauntered, in spite of 
 my eagerness, rather slowly up the opposite side of the 
 way — whom should I see just hopping down the door 
 steps but Master Ferdy, with his freckled face, even 
 that off, rather more than usually indicative of toffy. 
 
 There was a most extraordinary compound of ex- 
 pression, a completely double expression, if I may so 
 call it, of mischief and fright, both at the same time 
 twinkling in his eyes and lurking about the corners 
 of his mouth, as if, though dreading the consequences, 
 he could not positively resist the malicious fun with 
 which, in spite of himself, he addressed me when I came 
 up to him.
 
 124 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 With an iudescribable wink of his eye, and a jerk of 
 his thumb towards the interior of the house, he said 
 — " Oh my ! Cousin Frank, I've got something to tell 
 you ! Here's such a lark I Katie has had a letter this 
 morning, a love-letter I expect, only our lady's-maid 
 says it isn't the right time for valentines, you know, and 
 even if it was, these louts of foreigners don't know 
 what valentines are ; but this came under cover 
 directed to me, and when I gave it to Katie you should 
 I e colour she was, as red as a peony. 
 
 Isn't it prime? but don't you go and show me up now 
 for having told you, because, perhaps, she would rather 
 you didn't know." 
 
 " You confounded young scamp," I said, as I bon- 
 netted his hat down over his face. 
 
 " Ah, ah ! I thought it would make somebody jolly 
 jealous," sung out the impudent young wretch, with a 
 snooks at me, just as he wriggled himself out of reach 
 of my toe, with which if I had caught him as I tried, 
 it would have been well into the middle of the next 
 week before he forgot it, I'll engage to say ; but 
 fortunately for himself he escaped, and cut away with 
 redoubled crows of defiance, while I ran up unan- 
 nounced, as I always was accustomed to do, to the 
 sitting-room on the first floor. 
 
 I found only my aunt there alone, well settled into
 
 INGENUI VULTUS PUER, INGENUI QUE PUDORIS! 125 
 
 some new Tauchnitz novel, which must have been a 
 real tackier, as, for the first time since my acquaintance 
 had commenced, I found her disinclined to talk ; she 
 just looked up from her hook to tell me that poor 
 Katie was suffering from a bad head-ache, and had not 
 left her own room the whole morning, and that the 
 
 colonel had said and she stopped short ; as if, for 
 
 once in a way, she had been going to rattle off, and 
 had thought better of it ; then she relapsed so entirely 
 into her absorbing romance, or whatever it was, that 
 I found I only received rare and disjointed answers 
 to my attempts at conversation : so after fidgetting 
 a bit about the room, and asking my aunt if she felt 
 inclined to come out for a walk, which she was not, 
 I had nothing for it but to start out by myself, as the 
 thought at the moment suddenly struck me, in pui'suit 
 of Master Ferdy, to whom I was just in the humour 
 to administer a little serious counsel, or may be 
 a little wholesome chastisement for his transgres- 
 sions. 
 
 Pretty well knowing his haunts, I came suddenly 
 upon my young friend in acorner of the Grosse Garten, 
 where with two other little urchins, who went to the 
 same day school as himself, he was partaking in the 
 enjoyment of mud pies, and swimming walnut-shell 
 boats in the boundary ditch of that Elysium.
 
 126 MELCniOR GORLES. 
 
 Before he was even aware of the approach of the 
 enemy I had clutched the young gentleman by the 
 scrufiF of the neck, to the great and manifold amaze- 
 ment, not only of himself and his juvenile companions, 
 who fled away howling, hut also of two sky-blue 
 dragoons in Minerva's shaped helmets, who, seated 
 on one of the benches hard by, had sought that un- 
 frequented spot to discuss together in retirement bon- 
 bons and other sweet stuff, in which delicacies it is 
 the custom of those warlike youths of the Saxon 
 army to expend the greater portion of their monthly 
 pay. 
 
 At first, the hands of those sons of Mars instinc- 
 tively flying to their sword hilts, they had seemed half 
 inclined to interfere in aid of the victim of the sudden 
 assault which they had witnessed ; but either perceiv- 
 ing my stout walking-cane, or very likely recognising 
 all parties concerned as Englishers, and, therefore, 
 incomprehensible and unaccountable, they shrugged 
 their shoulders, and between them pulled a fresh bon- 
 bon with a crack which made their eyes sparkle with 
 enthusiasm. 
 
 " Now, young man," I said, addressing Ferdy, who 
 was wriggling in my grasp like a lively eel, " I've got 
 you ; listen to me quietly and I won't hurt you, and 
 if, like that fellow I heard you spouting about from
 
 . NGENUI YULTUS PUER, INGENUI QUE PUDORIS I 127 
 
 your Virgil the other morning, you will come quietly, 
 and *sit clown under yonder wide-spreading beech-tree ;' 
 I only want to talk to you very seriously, but if you 
 attempt to escape, or kick up any row, I shall feel com- 
 pelled to shake you till every bone in your skin has 
 jumbled out of its right place : in the first place how 
 dare you use such an expression as you did this morn- 
 ing, in regard to any feeling as existing between your 
 sister and myself? which, young imp as you are, I 
 suppose you have sense to know, would, if it came to 
 your father or mother's ears, make all the diiFerence 
 in the world as regards the footing on which I am 
 at present allowed to be in your family, and which I do 
 not want to forfeit for the sake of your impudence and 
 jabber; besides, your own good feeling ought to tell you 
 that no English boy, however young, would ever 
 couple such rude and vulgar ideas with his own sister's 
 name as love-letters, valentines, and jealousy, or trash 
 of that sort. Why, if you had been sent to school in 
 England instead of this humbugging place," I slipped 
 out, " the very first thing a school-boy learns at seven 
 years old is, to keep secret from the others even his 
 sisters' Christian names, or any sort of mention about 
 them. At least it was always so in my day, at private 
 schools as well as Eton. 
 " But far worse than your impudent chaff to me,
 
 128 ■ MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 is your allowing yourself to be the bearer of letters 
 to Katie, which the writer, whoever he may be, does 
 not venture to send to her openly ; for you must have 
 had some previous underhand instructions in that 
 matter, to have been thus trusted with an enclosure of 
 that sort ; perhaps," I added (though I was sorry the 
 next minute that it thus escaped me), " you knew 
 that it came from the same person to whom you were 
 little rascal enough to sell a piece of your sister's hair 
 for a thaler ?" 
 
 This idea had got into my head, and tormented me 
 nearly to distraction since hearing of the letter which 
 she had thus clandestinely received. 
 
 " Holloa ! Cousin Frank, who put you up to that ? 
 though it's a regular crammer to say that I ever sold it, 
 all the same ; but I don't quite see what odds it is to 
 you exactly, if I did," replied the urchin, seeming 
 to be partially recovering some of his natural audacity. 
 " Has Miss Katie told you that ? I don't think she 
 need have pretended to be so shocked and ashamed 
 that she couldn't bear to think that anybody should 
 know it, and made me promise not to say anything about 
 it before Papa, or Mamma, or anybody ; but was it 
 really her who told you ? for if she did, she is a regular 
 sneak." 
 
 "Is it likely," I answered, rather jesuitically, with
 
 INOENUI VULTUS PUER, INGENUI QUE PUDOFdS ! ]29 
 
 another question, " that if she, as you tell me, was 
 too much annoyed to wish anybody to know such a 
 thing, even your papa and mamma, that she should 
 tell a distant connexion, a comparative stranger like 
 myself? — but I know it, and that is enough." 
 
 " Then you must have had a letter from your friend 
 Mr. Gorles himself, and what a regular chouse of him 
 to sneak of me, because I wouldn't have done such a 
 thing, I am sure, if I could have helped myself, but I 
 really couldn't. But he put me up to begging that 
 lock of hair of Katie for myself, and then, for he was 
 always very goodnatured to me, he offered to take it 
 himself to Elimeyer's, the jeweller, to be plaited, and 
 put into my new locket which mamma had given to 
 me J but when he brought it back to me, I saw it was 
 a piece of brown silk, not quite the same colour, and 
 accused him of playing me the trick to tease me ; at 
 first he denied it, but afterwards he said he wanted to 
 keep that hair, to have a bit of fun with it, and he 
 made me a present of a thaler, not for the hair, be- 
 cause I wouldn't have done such a thing as sell it to 
 him ; of course, it wasn't likely ; but if I would promise 
 not to tell anybody, that he never would either, as long 
 as he lived. But now he has broken his word, and 
 told you, I suppose, it is no secret ; and I was really 
 ashamed, and sorry, when Katie found it out, and 
 
 VOL. I. K
 
 130 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 spoke to me so seriously about it ; but, as I say, I 
 couldn't help it." 
 
 " Couldn't belp it, you young rascal !" and I sup- 
 pose the grip in which I still held his collar involun- 
 tarily tightened a little. 
 
 " No ! but don't choke me. Cousin Frank, or 
 shake me so, till I feel all limp. No more could any 
 one else, not even you yourself couldn't help yourself, 
 though you are ever so much bigger, if he had you 
 in his power as he has me. Why," — and here the 
 boy's eyes distended themselves to twice their usual 
 size — "do you know that if Mr. Gorles chooses, 
 he knows a secret by which he could strike me down 
 dead on the spot, though he might be miles and miles 
 away somewhere else ? He told me so himself, and 
 after what I have seen of him, and mvself been throusjh 
 with him, I am quite positive, certain that he really 
 can : he has got my soul in his power, I know ; and 
 what is more, I think he has my sister Katie's too, 
 though I don't think she knows it yet, but she will 
 find it out some day. I have never told anybody yet 
 what I am going now to tell you ; but as he broke my 
 secret, I can't see why I shouldn't break his ; indeed, 
 I cannot go on much longer without telling some- 
 body, — and perhaps as you are his old schoolfellow and 
 friend, as I heard my papa one day say you were, he
 
 INGENUI VULTUS PVER, INGENUI QUE PUDORIS! 131 
 
 wont mind so much, and wont strike me down tins 
 time ; but, anyhow, tell you I must, or I feel sometimes 
 as if I should burst, and so I may as well die by one 
 way as the other." 
 
 And so, Avhimpering, and occasionally stopping as if 
 to listen, or looking round in a wild and terrified 
 manner, as if he really thought the fatal moment for 
 striking was at hand, he certainly gave me a most ex- 
 traordinary though circumstantial account of what, 
 as he expressed it, " he had been through," and why 
 he was in the power of "my friend" Gorles, as he 
 would persist in calling him 
 
 Coupled with Lambard's own experience and similar 
 early impressions in connexion with this person, it is 
 not very strange that he should have been so much 
 struck with his young cousin's wonderful story, as to 
 have written it down while fresh in his memory, and 
 having carefully read it over to the boy, made him 
 sign his name at the bottom of it ; which authentic 
 document, nearly written in the boy's own words, I 
 had in my own possession, and copied verhat'im, as will 
 be seen in the next chapter. 
 
 r2
 
 132 MELCHIOR GOBLES. 
 
 CHAPTER XIV. 
 
 MASTER FERDY's EXPERIENCES. 
 
 * 
 
 ''Well, then, Cousin Frank" — after a renewed torrent 
 of entreaties to stand by liim, and save him from the 
 consequences of his confessions, which I promised to do 
 if he concealed nothing — "well, then," commenced the 
 conscience-stricken Ferdy, "when your ' great friend' 
 Mr. Gorles first called and made the acquaintance of 
 them at home, he was always very kind to, and took 
 much notice of me, and didn't snub rao and seem 
 glad when it was time for me to be off to school, as 
 you always do, you know ; and in short, despise my 
 company. On the contrary, he was always giving 
 me lots of toffy and sugar-balls, and kreutzers almost 
 every day, and if he met me in the street he would 
 stop and nod to me, and very often join, and walk 
 home with me ; and sometimes he took me out for 
 wmlks all by ourselves, and always seemed so kind, and 
 wanting to know so much about us all at home. He 
 liked me to tell him everything ; all about poor little
 
 MASTER FERDTS EXPERIENCES. 133 
 
 Cicely, our sister who died, and how old she was, and 
 what she was like, which I could not tell him, because 
 I was ever such a little chap, quite a baby, at that time ; 
 and about myself, and what I should like to be when 
 I grew up, and so on ; and all about Katie, how old 
 she was exactly, and when was her birthday, and what 
 she liked best, and if I thought she liked any one best ; 
 and he told me to ask our old nurse Harrison, who 
 you know has been with Papa long before he married 
 my Mamma, and before Katie was born, if she'could re- 
 member exactly what time, whether in the morning or 
 the evening she was born; — and so I did, and nurse told, 
 me at eight minutes past nine on the morning of the 
 3rd of February exactly, which, when I told him, he 
 wrote down in a little red note-book, into which he 
 was always putting notes about all sorts of things 
 which he used to ask me, and I used to tell him. 
 
 " One day he took me into the Royal Fabriken with 
 liim, and while he and the man had gone on to the 
 further part of the show-rooms, I unluckily happened 
 to tumble against — well — no, I promised to tell you 
 the truth — I was making the sails of one of the China 
 windmills go round when it flew light off, and besides 
 breaking itself, pitched into a lot of China flowers, 
 which it knocked over and smashed all to bits. 
 
 " Mr. Gorles came running back with the man when
 
 134 MELCniOR GORLES. 
 
 tliey heard the row, and at first seemed going to blow 
 me up no end ; but then he stopped, because, as I say, 
 he was always very kind to me, and said he supposed 
 it was an accident, and that he would pay the man 
 what he asked for the damage, wdiich was eight or nine 
 thalers, and I must pay him back by degrees when I 
 got the money ; and he never told of me, and forbade 
 me to say anything about it at home ; and so, of course, 
 how could I feel anything but most grateful and 
 ready to do anything in the world he asked me ? For 
 if it had not been for him, he told me that for wilfully 
 touching and damaging King John's property I might 
 have been taken up and put in prison for many months, 
 perhaps sent altogether out of the country, but that 
 his interest, and paying on the spot, as he had done, 
 had saved me. 
 
 " It was about ten days or a fortnight after that he 
 asked me when I thought I should be able to pay him, 
 and I had to say I didn't know, but I only had fifteen 
 kreutzers in the world. He told me that if I would 
 promise and vow always to do implicitly all he wished, 
 and keep his secrets, he would perhaps let me ofl" at 
 least part of the great sum he had so readily paid 
 for me. 
 
 "And that is why I complied, and did not tell till 
 Katie found it out aud taxed me with it, about her hair.
 
 MASTER FERDY'S EXPERIENCES. 135 
 
 and other stvange things he made me do for him, for 
 I never, even if I had wished, dared to refuse him. 
 
 *'But one night — it was the night of Katie's first ball 
 at the King's palace, and she, with Papa and Mamma, 
 had just gone off, about eight in the evening, I was 
 going to bed — when who should come into the little 
 sitting room out of which, as you know, my room 
 opens, but Mr. Gorles. 
 
 " He had come up without any one seeing him, for 
 nurse and Clotilde the lady's-maid had both gone out 
 the moment mamma's back was turned, as they always 
 do, you know. 
 
 *' He seemed to know it at least, for he never asked 
 for them or looked surprised ; but he said if, instead of 
 going to bed so early, I should like to come with him, 
 that he would take me out for a pleasant evening, 
 and if I never told it would be great fun, and no one 
 would be one bit the wiser. So, to deceive the ser- 
 vants he put tlie linen bag into the bed, which 
 looked just like me curled up, and left some of my 
 things and a pair of boots outside the door. 
 
 " I was in an awful funk, and knew what a jolly row 
 there would be if I was found out ; and yet I felt I 
 could not refuse. I never could. When he made me 
 do anything particular like that, he would hold me by 
 my thumbs and look so hard into my eyes he made
 
 136 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 me tremble, though I liked hira, too, all the time; — so 
 I shut ray door, with the things tumbled outside, and 
 followed him. 
 
 " There was no one to see us go downstairs or out 
 of the street door. Instead of taking the way, as I 
 expected, to his own lodgings, where I had been with 
 him before unbeknown, we set out in just the opposite 
 direction through different streets, till 1 knew we were 
 in the Alte Markt, in the further corner of which we 
 passed through a low archway, right on to the end of 
 a sort of passage or yard full of old tubs and broken 
 boxes and lumber, and then up a very narrow 
 winding staircase, up and up, and creaked it did at 
 every step, — I began to think we never should get to 
 the top. 
 
 " I had to stop two or three times to take breath ; 
 besides, I began to be frightened lest perhaps he was 
 leading me up some dreadful place to murder me, as, 
 when I stopped, he turned to speak quite crossly and 
 impatiently, and not at all like he generally used 
 to do. 
 
 "At last, when I thought we must be getting nearly 
 up to the sky, we came to a door at which he knocked 
 one, two, three times slowly and distinctly ; and when 
 that opened with a click, but we saw no one, we passed 
 through a long dark passage to another door which
 
 MASTER FERDY'S EXPERIENCES. 137 
 
 had a curtain or piece of carpet hung across it, shoving 
 through which we found ourselves in a good sized 
 room with a sloping ceiling running up to a point like 
 the top of a tent. 
 
 " When I could begin a little to see about me, for the 
 room was as full of thick smoke as any dense fog, I 
 made out four people all smoking great pipes. Two 
 of them were students, I knew, by their coloured caps 
 and funny clothes ; then there was a Frenchman, for 
 they always spoke to him in French, and I noticed 
 that he didn't seem to understand them when the 
 others talked German among themselves, and the 
 other one had an awful lot of shaggy hair, like a 
 regular mane, all over his shoulders, and he wore dark 
 spectacles. Oh, but I forgot to tell you that once 
 when I had stopped for breath upon the steep wind- 
 ing stairs, ]\Ir. Gorles had particularly charged and 
 warned me that when we got up among some friends 
 of his, whom we should find where he was going to take 
 me, I was to mind not to speak a word unless I was 
 spoken to, to do just as I was told, and on no account 
 to let them know tliat I understood German, but that 
 he should tell them that I spoke and knew English 
 only. 
 
 "Fancy what an awful crammer! and that was 
 not the onlv crammer he told, or made me tell for
 
 138 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 him, which I could not somehow help, though I knew 
 all the time how dreadfully wicked it was. 
 
 " When we had got into the room, ' Hey, my friend,' 
 said the Frenchman, speaking what I suppose he would 
 call English, ' is it that you have with you there the 
 infant of whom you have entertained us ? Let us see 
 him.' 
 
 "And they all shook me by the hand, and laughed, 
 or rather grinned, like what our maid calls ' Cheshire 
 cats,' at me, and slapped me on my hack, and told 
 me not to he afraid, though I held my tongue, and 
 pretended not to understand what they said in German, 
 just as Mr. Gorles had desired me. 
 
 "'How old are you?' they asked; hut I didn't 
 answer, though of course I understood them well 
 enough ; which I could see, when they were talking 
 quickly among themselves, Mr. Gorles could do 
 hut very little. 
 
 " There was one of the students who talked English 
 quite perfectly, and I should have thought was an 
 Englishman, if it had not been for his queer cut clothes 
 and his long boots, and pointed beard and moustache ; 
 and besides he talked German amongst the others, 
 quite as fast and as well as any of them ; he asked me 
 again — 
 
 " ' How old are you,' he said, ' my brave boy ?'
 
 MASTER FERDY'S EXPERIENCES. 139 
 
 " ' Twelve and three-quarters,' I answered, for so I 
 was then, though now^ I am regularly in my teens, you 
 know. 
 
 " ' Oh, damn it !' he said, in the very best English, 
 quite naturally, just as Papa or you might, you know, 
 ' we don't want a lad of twelve years old, we desire 
 one entirely innocent, w^ho knows nothing of guile or 
 sin ;' and then, turning to his companions, he said in 
 his own language, ' Max, thinkest thou that at 
 thirteen years, wanting three months, any innocency 
 remained with thee ? I wager not, nor yet with 
 Monsieur Gustave, nor our revered friend the Pro- 
 fessoi", either at eleven, or ten, or even nine, was much 
 innocency to be found ;' and they had a long talk, 
 serious, and yet laughing among themselves, in which 
 Mr. Gorles did his best to join, but the 'mulls' he 
 made in the language were no end. 
 
 " But as he seemed to keep on protesting and ex- 
 plaining, the one who spoke English, and whom they 
 called Yon Lion, turned and asked me some more 
 questions, and spoke to me about things I could not 
 make out the meaning of; and, seeming to make no- 
 thing of me, they then all said that they could but 
 try, or something to that effect. 
 
 " One of them then brought out of an old black- 
 looking carved cabinet which stood back in a sort
 
 140 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 of recess, what looked liked a great solid globe of 
 glass, whicli he put in the middle of the table, which 
 was in the centre of the room, and round which we 
 were all standing, placing it very carefully upon a 
 large block of wood or something square, covered over 
 with a piece of black velvet, on the edges of which 
 were all sorts of queer figures and topsy-turvy letters, 
 like the things one sees on the big coloured bottles in 
 doctors' shops. 
 
 " They then all put away their pipes, and turned 
 down the lamp, which hung from the middle of the 
 ceihng, and gave all the light there was, till, dark as 
 it had been before, we could now only just make out 
 each other, like so many shadows in the smoke, and 
 there was a dead silence. After a little pause, they 
 all knelt down most solemnly round the table. Mr. 
 Gorles made me kneel down between himself and the 
 other student (not the one who had been question- 
 ing me), who began, when we were all quite settled on 
 our knees, to say, or rather sing out a droning sort 
 of prayer, only it seemed to be in verse, very much 
 like what I heard at the King's Catholic Kirche, when 
 I went with mamma one day to hear the service 
 there. 
 
 "At first I thought it was in German, but I couldn't 
 make out any meaning in it, and afterwards began to
 
 MASTER FERDTS EXPERIENCES. 141 
 
 think it must be Latin, for some of the words were 
 just like old Schultz, the usher at our school, pro- 
 nounces Ovid and Virgil, which, when I repeat them 
 at home. Papa always says are all wrong, and not a bit 
 like what he ever learned for Latin. 
 
 "After this was over, tliey turned on a little more 
 light, and, bringing me forward, spoke to me in a 
 very solemn voice, desiring me to compose myself, 
 and if I had any sort of wicked thoughts in my head, 
 — which of course I had all the while, telling such a 
 fib about not knowing German, besides being out 
 from home at such a time without Papa or Mamma's 
 having an idea of it; — but what wicked thoughts I 
 had I was to dismiss entirely, and to fix my eyes and 
 my thoughts with all my mind on the glass ball, or 
 crystal, I heard them say it was, and to tell them if I 
 could see any things or persons in it. 
 
 " I looked ever so long, with all my might, but all I 
 could see was the reflection of the lamp hanging over 
 our heads, and my own and their faces topsy-turvy, 
 and out of all shape, just as one does in a tablespoon, 
 and that was all, though they all stood round quite 
 still, and hardly breathing, seeming to expect that I 
 should begin to see something else than what I have 
 told you, but it was no use their expecting, as nothing 
 came.
 
 142 MELCUIOR GOBLES. 
 
 "Mr. Gorles, who had been veiy cross and snappish 
 towards me all the evening, got very impatient, and 
 said I was a stupid Httle fool for my pains ; but Von 
 Lion and the others, I suppose because they were 
 strangers, were more civil, and told me not to mind, 
 but that I should see beautiful things presently, if 
 I wasn't afraid. 
 
 " Then, after another earnest talk together, they set 
 me up in an old-fashioned high-backed chair, and the 
 one they called the Professor, with the shaggy head, 
 took off his green spectacles, and took hold of me by 
 my two thumbs, quite gently, and desired me to look 
 with all my might into his eyes, and most wonderful 
 eyes they certainly were — they sparkled like lucifer 
 matches, or like our black cat's do in the dark. 
 
 " He stared at me with these sparkling eyes, and 
 I stared back with all my might at him. 
 
 " Presently he let go my thumbs, and began paw- 
 ing with his lanky sort of claws of fingers in front 
 of my face, closer and closer without quite touching 
 me, which made my eyes feel sore and heavy, and I 
 remember trying to look away, but found I couldn't ; 
 so there I had to sit staring at him, when I found 
 my head begin to go round and round, and a noise 
 of rushing in my ears, at first slow — whiz, whiz — 
 and then gradually whiz, whiz-z-z-z-z, like a rail-
 
 MASTER FERDY'S EXPERIENCES. 143 
 
 way train, rather a jolly sensation tliau not, and my 
 eyes shut of their own accord, but the very instant 
 they did so, the rummest thing was that I saw my- 
 self as if I was somebody else, looking on, distinctly 
 in a bright flash of light. I could see the back of 
 my own head, and all round the back of the big 
 chair I was sitting in, and all the five others of them 
 standing round, perfectly quiet, in the dim light, 
 watching the strange man who Avas thus coming his 
 dodges close to my nose. I could see ray own face, 
 and my own eyelids shut close, all in a single flash, as 
 I say, as quick as thought, for I only shut my eyes for 
 one minute, and opened them again directly; but when 
 I did so it was as if I had awoke up from a deep sleep, 
 and they had all moved and were gathered round me. 
 The lamp was turned up, and the ]'oora was almost 
 quite clear of smoke ; some one had unfastened my 
 collar, and they were fanning me with an atlas or some 
 kind of large portfolio, and one was bathing my fore- 
 head and hands with cold water. 
 
 " I felt very queer, and inclined to be sick, which, 
 however, soon went off; but what then astonished me 
 most, though I have grown used to it since, was that the 
 clock just opposite to me as I sat down in that chair 
 pointed to nine exactly; and, just as one of them opened 
 the window to let in some fresh air upon me, and I
 
 144 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 ■was noticing tlie full moon sinning brightly in over 
 the roof of the houses and chimney pots, up amongst 
 which we seemed to be, the great clock of the 
 Frauen Kirclie began booming out twelve, and then I 
 heard the other bells in different directions strike the 
 same ; and looking up to the clock in the room, sure 
 enough, that had both hands at twelve also. I got up 
 out of the big chair and went towards the open window, 
 out of which while I was leaning, feeling very miserable 
 and in an awfnl funk, thinking how I ever should 
 get home again without being found out, and what a 
 row there would be when I was missed, as I was sure 
 I must have been long before this, I heard them in 
 the room talking away again with all their might in 
 German, whether or no I could ever have seen 
 pictures of Frederic the Great, or Wallenstein, or 
 Schiller, to have been able to describe them all so 
 exactly as I had done : and two or three other names 
 I had never mentioned and don't think I ever even 
 heard of before. 
 
 " This puzzled me, and I could not make out what 
 they could be talking about exactly, because I had 
 never tried even to describe anybody, or uttered a 
 syllable about any of them. 
 
 " Then they turned upon Mr. Gorles for saying I 
 couldn't speak German, for that I had talked it the 
 whole time as if I were a native.
 
 MASTER FERDY'S EXPERIENCES. 145 
 
 "But be stuck to it still that I knewnotbiug but 
 English, and that be bad been perfectly astonished to 
 bear me himself, which was, you know, a regularbauger; 
 though, as to my having talked German, that was only 
 ftnother as big, as I tell you I bad never opened my 
 mouth except to say that I could see nothing in the 
 glass. 
 
 " But the shaggy-headed one, who liad put on bis 
 spectacles again, made !Mr. Gorles repeat bis assertion, 
 and seemed to think itverv imnortanLsavinq- sometbinf'* 
 about its being the proof of a certainly established 
 though still disputed phenomenon (or some such stun- 
 ning big word) in science. 
 
 " Then Mr. Gorles came across to me at the window 
 and threatened, and entreated me to stick to it that I 
 could only speak English, and not German; and 1 
 knew very well that I had not done so. 
 
 "When he joined them again, be seemed sulky and 
 complaining about something they bad refused, on 
 which they turned upon him, and talked about de- 
 basing the noblest secrets of science to his trumpery 
 Tiews on a frilulein, on which be seemed to be very 
 angry, and they only laughed and jeered at him. 
 
 " I felt altogether bewildered and puzzled, and was 
 longing to get back home to my own little room, and 
 yet dreading the consequences of having come out as 
 
 VOL. I. L
 
 146 MELCHIOR GORLEH. 
 
 I had ; and at last, when I had shaken hands with 
 them all, and the shock-headed man had stared at Die 
 again tlu'ongh his spectacles, and asked me if I would 
 come again and have another game of staring with 
 him, we got downstairs and on our way home. It 
 was a bright moonlight night and we kept along the 
 shady dark sides of the streets till Mr. Gorles, who, I 
 told you, had all along been very sharp and disagreeable 
 to me, stopped at the corner of one of the empty 
 streets. There was not a soul to be seen in them ; 
 onlv in the distance we could hear the clatter of car- 
 riages, I suppose coming home from the king's ball 
 at the Schloss, which made me think what should I 
 do if Papa aiid Mamma were to have come home before 
 we got back. 
 
 " Mr. Gorles stopped suddenly and turned my face 
 round to the moonlight, which I suppose showed 
 what a funk I was in, and said that I should not leave 
 that spot until I had solemnly promised never to tell 
 a living soul that I had been out with him as I had, 
 or anvthiuCT about what I had seen or done, or where 
 I had spent the evening, not even if my absence was 
 found out when we got home ; but that if I should 
 make the promise he would manage to find sufficient 
 excuses for me and get me out of the scrape ; but that 
 if ever I dared tell, he said in a most dreadful voice —
 
 MASTER FERDY'S EXPERIENCES. 147 
 
 that is, you know, it would have been most dreadful if 
 it had not been rather squeaky — that as sure as the 
 words passed my lips I should be struck down dead 
 the very same instant for breaking my solemn oath. 
 Only I never took the oath, you see, though he wanted 
 me to do so ; I said I wouldn't, because I knew it was 
 a dreadful sin to take oaths or swear ; mamma had 
 told me so; and he didn^t even get the promise out of 
 me as he wished, though he kept threatening and de- 
 claring that he should have a secret power over my 
 life even if he were not near me, that is not even here 
 at Dresden, but away, even as far as Paris or in Eng- 
 land itself, it would be all the same ; but whether he 
 meant to be down upon me through telegraph or not 
 I cannot say. 
 
 " When we got to Liittichau Strasse Mr. Gorles told 
 me to wait at the corner while he went on to see if it 
 was all right; and there was I standing for ten or 
 fifteen minutes all alone, and beginning to get dread- 
 fully cold, and frightened too, at being left thus, at 
 one o'clock in the morning, all by myself. I did not 
 know but that there might be robbers, or even worse, 
 perhaps ghosts, prowling about at that time. 
 
 " I was just making up my mind to come on in spite 
 of all risks when I saw his figure skulking along, 
 just like a cat, on the dark shadowy side of the 
 
 L 2
 
 148 MELCHIOR COBLES. 
 
 Strasse. He whispered that it was all right, and that 
 my people had not yet returned from the hall ; and 
 sure enough when we got to our own house they were 
 not, and the street door was unfastened. 
 
 " The BernstofFs, who lived in the same house at 
 that time, were also gone I knew to the hall at the 
 Schloss, which I suppose was the reason of the front 
 door heing left open. 
 
 "And there was the private entrance of our apart- 
 ments also ajar, and Harrison and mamma's maid 
 both snoring fast asleep in their chairs, with the lamp 
 on the table gone out, though it seemed only just to 
 have done so, as it was still smoking and smelt like 
 anything. 
 
 " I could see quite plainly, fur the moon was shining 
 right in at the staircase windows : no one had touched 
 the things at my door, so I knew no one had been in 
 there, and didn't I turn out the clothes-bag and nip 
 into bed in less than winking. 
 
 " I don't think I could have been there five minutes 
 before they all came home. Mamma came in to look 
 at me, but I pretended to be f^^st asleep. 
 
 " I almost thought she would have twigged me when 
 she leant down to give me a kiss. She cried out to 
 nurse, who stood waiting at the door with a candle,
 
 MASTER FERDY'S EXPERIENCES. H9 
 
 ' Why, bless the child, how cold he is ; how long has 
 he been to bed?' 
 
 " I only gave a snort and a turn, without opening 
 my eyes, us nurse answered, ' Oh, ever since nine 
 o'clock, punctual, ma'am,' which slie couldn't possibly 
 have known, even if I had, as I knew verv well that 
 she and Clotilde had both gone across to old Mrs. 
 Pidgers's over the way, to tea, at half-past eight, the 
 moment mamma's back was turned. 
 
 "For though nurse Harrison is such a very faithful 
 old servant, that mamma often says she may he trusted 
 to any amount, she does tell most awful crammers 
 sometimes. 
 
 "And so you see I never was found out ; and not 
 being questioned, run no risk of being struck dead 
 for telling. 
 
 " When next day I met Mr. Gorles, he looked at 
 me exactly as if nothing of all that I have been telling 
 you had ever happened between us. 
 
 " As soon as I was alone with him, which, as I 
 noticed, he seemed not to wish to be, I tried to say 
 something confidential-like about our mysterious ad- 
 ventures together of the evening before. 
 
 " I had had time by then to think over, and consider 
 that all I had been through had in it something
 
 150 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 mysterious and wonderful ; it began to seem to be 
 some unknown sort of awfully horrible wickedness. 
 
 " But he only looked as if he could not the least 
 understand what on earth I was talking about. 
 
 " But when I persisted, and went on to speak about' 
 the garret, and the strange party we had met there, and 
 the crystal, and the odd effect their tricks had had on 
 myself (though there my ideas were the most confused), 
 and also the dreadful threats he had held over me on 
 our way home through the empty streets, he still 
 kept up a look of astonishment, and seemed be- 
 wildered, and stoutly declared I must have dreamt 
 every word of it ; and that I was going to have brain 
 fever, and wanted some medicine. 
 
 " Now though I may be young and green, I was not 
 going to be done entirely in that way, so I said, ' Oh, 
 very well, if it is only all a dream I shall go and tell 
 it all to my Papa and my Mamma, and see what they 
 think of it.' 
 
 " Then you should just have seen his face, when I 
 said that I should tell them how I had dreamt that he 
 had threatened to strike me down dead. 
 
 " He answered, that as for that, if I ever dared tell 
 anybody that story, or even alluded to such a thing, 
 that he had no doubt it would really happen to me ; 
 and then he said I must remember about Joseph in
 
 MASTER FERDTS EXPERIENCES. 151 
 
 the book of Genesis, how he sometimes had queer 
 dreams, which, though they "were dreams, yet all meant 
 something, and cametopass; and so inmycase there was 
 no reason that a special trial for my young soul 
 might not have been sent from Heaven, and that after 
 so solemn a warning as I described, that if I did dare 
 to divulge all that appeared to have hap peued to me, 
 I should more than probably be really struck down, 
 and in his opinion served right too, for not taking 
 proper warning. 
 
 " And his look at me, as he said this, was so dreadful 
 that I feel quite sure that, though he might wish me to 
 forget, and try to persuade me out of my own broad 
 awake senses, he meant at the same time to impress 
 his threats on my mind as deeply as he could. Since 
 that, and at times pretending to put on his old kind 
 manner, "which, as I told you, he had entirely dropped 
 that night, but still keeping up his humbug about 
 knowing nothing about it, he talked me into describing 
 what that shaggy-headed man did to me in my dream, 
 as he would always call it, though, of course, he knew 
 better : and made me tell him what my ownfeelings were 
 under the strange treatment, and so gradually got on, 
 to my letting him try the same dodges himself, just as 
 he said at first, for fun, and to show me what fancy it 
 all was ; and so having once begun, he has often done
 
 152 MELCIIIOR GORLES. 
 
 it since when we have been alone, and now he can put 
 me sound to sleep, whenever he likes, in two minutes 
 or less, merely by fixing his eyes upon me, and waving 
 his hands half-a-dozen times over my face. 
 
 " On the whole, I have come to think it rather plea- 
 sant than not, except that when I wake I feel so 
 dreadfnlly weary and tired, just as if I had been for a 
 tremendous long run, instead of fast asleep on his 
 sofa for ever so long, as I can tell by seeing how the 
 clock has gone, though, like the first time on that 
 strange night, I have only seemed to shut my eyes and 
 open them again the same instant. 
 
 "Though I had left off" liking and caring for Mr. 
 Gorles as I used to do, I cannot tell you how strongly 
 and how constantly I have caught myself longing to 
 be with him, and have often seemed, without any one 
 to tell me, to know when he was coming, and some- 
 how, as if drawn towards him, and in spite of myself, 
 obliged to obey and comply with him in everything. 
 
 " Indeed it is all very fine, cousin Frank," con- 
 cluded the poor lad, suddenly changing his note from 
 the most plaintive depths to the highest indignation, 
 "for you to pitch into me about that hair of Katie's, 
 or the giving her the letter, which 1 knew the moment 
 I touched it must have come from him, bat I should 
 like to see even you, big as you are, try to disobey
 
 MASTER FERDY'S EXPERIENCES. 153 
 
 him, if he had only once got the same wonderfal power 
 over you." 
 
 " Humph I " was all I said in reply to the boy, for 
 I did not care to let liim know exactly what my own 
 private thoughts were upon all that he had been tell- 
 ing me.
 
 154 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER XV. 
 
 COLONEL DE LORME FORBIDS HIS NEPHEW HIS 
 
 HOUSE. 
 
 On reaching the De Lormes' house I left the hoy with 
 a kinder shake of the hand than I think he had ever 
 yet had from me, which seemed to gratify, though 
 rather surprise the young beggar, whom I then for the 
 first time, though he really was my own blood relation, 
 found myself taking a sort of kindly interest in, and 
 discovering to have perhaps a warm-hearted, excitable 
 sort of nature, on which such deep impressions as he 
 had been describing might be easily made. But how 
 far had the same sort of impressions been tried or 
 succeeded on his sister I thought with a chill, which 
 seemed to make my very skin shrivel up too tight for 
 me, as I turned away towards my own lodgings. I 
 had inquired at the door, and hearing that Katie was 
 still too unwell to appear in the drawing-room, like an 
 idiot, as I thought myself afterwards, instead of going 
 up as usual, to spend my evening with my uncle and 
 aunt, walked home to the solitude of my own den.
 
 BE LORME FORBIDS HIS NEPHEW HIS HOUSE. 155 
 
 which was what I had not clone for many weeks 
 past. 
 
 But I longed to get away alone, to turn well 
 over in my mind the extraordinary account the hoy 
 had given me, and really consider whether I could not 
 devise some way of thwarting and avoiding the influ- 
 ence, which, though in what exact manner I could 
 hardly define, yet still I had a distinct presentiment, 
 was closely hanging over Katie's and my own imme- 
 diate destinies. 
 
 Yes, it certainly was idiotic and had policy on my 
 part to walk off as I did that evening, because Katie 
 was not to he found sitting in the drawing-room, as 
 she had always been accustomed to do when well and 
 all right, because I have thought since it must have 
 first given occasion to my uncle and aunt to take 
 notice, and form certain conjectures which were, how- 
 ever, inevitable, and must have come sooner or later, 
 though, of course, the longer a disagreeable crisis is 
 postponed, the better one always fancies it to be. 
 
 The next day, and the day after that, I paid my 
 usual visit at about my usual time in as natural and 
 unconcerned a manner as I could assume. 
 
 Katie was still reported as unable to leave her room, 
 though I could not elicit at all "from what cause she 
 was supposed to be suffering.
 
 156 MELCHIOR GORLE&. 
 
 I did not like to appear too particular or urgent in 
 my inquiries after her, though I think they must have 
 themselves perceived the deep anxiety and mental dis- 
 tress I was enduring. 
 
 Though still kind and cordial when I went in 
 to pass my evenings with them, as I have told you had 
 become my recognised and established habit, there was 
 something (though even to myself I could hardly 
 define it) of change in the manner of both the Colonel 
 and my aunt; they seemed as if they were almost 
 more sorry than angry with me, but still there was a 
 sort of chill about them both. 
 
 I did not care to show any difference in my manner in 
 return, even if my heart, yearning as it was for some 
 comfort, or the vaguest chance of seeing her, had not 
 kept me hovering about the place, because I hoped it 
 would all blow over, and I did not wish to appear a 
 huffy fool and ungrateful after all the kindness I had 
 received from them ; but still though they, on their 
 part, did not seem to like in plain terras to hint at 
 such a thing, I began to be painfully aware that they 
 would not be sorry if I did not pay my evening visit 
 perhaps quite so regularly, and as a matter of course, 
 as heretofore. lu short, though I cotild not tell how 
 or why exactly, I began to feel that the footing I was 
 on with them was becoming uncomfortable : and so it
 
 BE LORME FORBIDS HIS NEPIIEIV HIS HOUSE. 157 
 
 "went on until one Sunday, when going down immedi- 
 ately after morning churcli to at least inquire, if not 
 go in, which, goodness knows, except for the reasons 
 I have jnst told you, was become anything but plea- 
 sant as it used to be, at the door I met Harrison, the 
 nurse, with whom I had always been on rather cheerv, 
 nod-my-head sort of terras, as I was constantly going 
 in and out. 
 
 That day she looked quite gloomily, I might almost 
 say savagely at me, as she answered my eager inquiries 
 after Katie. 
 
 " Miss De Lorme," she told me, " was quite as bad as 
 need's be, and had been delirious and screaming 
 frantic-like all night, if that was any gratification to 
 them as has been the cause of all this to know," 
 
 I could see, before I asked, the trouble, anxiety, 
 and grief which were weighing down the Colonel, whom 
 I found upstairs in the sitting-room alone, with no 
 attempt at occupation besides his own sad thoughts. 
 
 Instead of the kindly smile and word of welcome, 
 which I had always till lately received when I entered, 
 he rose from his chair, aiul making me the stiflFest of 
 inclinations, begged me in formal terms to be so good 
 as to take a seat, as he had to request the honour of a 
 very serious conversation with me, at the same time 
 laying some large sheets of paper and freshly prepared
 
 158 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 pens on the table before him. He went on to say, that 
 he thought it right to inform me that he felt it neces- 
 sary to commit what might pass between us fully to 
 writing for future reference, if required. His whole 
 manner and deportment were so ultra-military and 
 sublime, that I suppose, according to the old adage 
 which you of course know, it must have been within 
 a hair's breadth of bordering on that one step further. 
 Anyhow, miserable, anxious, and if the truth must be 
 told, half-frightened as for the moment I felt, yet it 
 was all I could do to keep from bursting out into a 
 laugh. 
 
 I fancy my sensations were very much in that inde- 
 scribable sort of mixed-up state, which the women-kind 
 are subject to when they enjoy themselves in a fit of 
 " high strikes," as Mrs. Harrison, I remember, (not 
 about me though) one day calling them. 
 
 I gulped down the rising inclination, however, and 
 was glad I could do so, but thinking the wisest way 
 was not to give in to such formal absurdities, but just 
 to take the bull by the horns at once — " Come, my 
 dear uncle," I said, " what is the matter ? and why are 
 you so put out and angry with me ? It has added to 
 the wretchedness which I have already suffered — which 
 I am sure we have all cause enough to suffer — to see as 
 I have for these last few days, that there is something ;
 
 DE LORME FORBIDS HIS NEPHEW HIS HOUSE. 159 
 
 and I would much sooner have the row, if there is to be 
 one, out at once, like a man, and know how I have 
 offended you, than go on in this unsatisfactory, uncom- 
 fortable manner, for I am quite sure that if I have 
 given you any just cause for ojQfence, it has been 
 totally unintentional on my part; so please let me 
 know the worst, and at once plainly say on." 
 
 The old gentleman gave me a queer look, as if half 
 inclined to resent my plain spoken way of disposing 
 of what he had, I fancy, been all that morning, or per- 
 haps longer, rehearsing in his own mind with all the 
 preliminaries of a domestic court-martial ; but his own 
 good sense prevailed, and he was, after all, a sensible 
 old buffer at bottom, though I had by that time found 
 him out as apt to get crochets into his head now and 
 then ; so, changing to a more conventional every- day 
 style of address than that in which he had begun, he 
 said — " Well then, Frank, my boy, tell me at once, can- 
 didly, can you account for this strange and sudden 
 illness of my dear daughter's ? Have you been saying 
 or telling her anytliing which can have caused her any 
 shock, or sudden effect on her nerves ? In short, in any 
 way explain the distressing, even dangerous state she 
 has been in ever since you and she returned home that 
 Tuesday evening from a late walk ? 
 
 " She complained that evening, as soon as she came
 
 160 MELCniOR GORLES. 
 
 m; but your aunt and myself thought no more of it 
 at first, than that you had imprudently induced her to 
 overtax her strength, and I told my wife at the time, 
 that for that, as well as, perhaps, other reasons ^Yhicll 
 had occurred to me, I had begun to think those very 
 long walks had better, perhaps, be for the future dis- 
 continued, but trusting that by next morning, or at 
 least in a day or two, Katie would be herself all right 
 again. 
 
 " So far from that, however, I am sorry to say, and 
 as you are, I suppose, aware, she has been grow- 
 ing worse and worse, until, last evening, from a 
 state of partial stupor, she became positively light- 
 headed, and has been screaming in delirium the whole 
 night through ; and as she cries out again and 
 again, the poor child continues to couple your name 
 in a most disagreeable, I may say a most horrible way 
 with that of the little former comrade of yours, you 
 know whom I mean ; and from some of the broken 
 exclamations and disjointed sentences, which betray 
 the thoughts and ideas which are now boiling and 
 seething through her poor wandering brain, I am only 
 more sorry than I can express, that I have more than 
 convincing proof that you, Frank Lambard, have 
 broken your most solemn jn'omise to me, and that your 
 word of honour is worthless, and not to be trusted."
 
 DE LORME FORBIDS HIS NEPHEW HIS HOUSE. 161 
 
 I was perfectly staggered, and actually could not 
 get out a syllable, before he went on again, solemnly. 
 
 "Frank Lambard, your father is the oldest and 
 dearest friend I ever had in this world, although it is 
 now some years since we have met; he was always 
 the strictest lover of truth, and the most honourable 
 man, the most scrupulous in small matters as well 
 as great, that I ever knew or heard of; judging you 
 - — his son — as I thought you would be worthy to be, 
 and could be judged, by his high standard, do you 
 remember my telling you how indignant I had been 
 at hearing a disgraceful story, which was told against 
 your character, repeated in my presence, even before 
 you yourself had had an opportunity of declaring it 
 to be a false and wicked slander, as I then was con- 
 vinced it was ? I mention that, because it was at 
 that very time that you made me the most solemn 
 promise never to repeat to either of my children, but 
 especially to my daughter, a most absurd and im- 
 possible romance to which you had, I grant you, quite 
 seriously, and as if you yourself really believed it, 
 tried to make me listen. 
 
 "It was not without very particular and most 
 serious reasons of my own that I demanded that 
 promise of you, though I felt that I was giving an 
 undue importance to such rubbish as it was. 
 
 VOL. I. M
 
 162 MELCmOR GORLES. 
 
 " And how have you kept that promise ? T am 
 sorry that I can now never again have the same con- 
 fidence in you, and painful as it is to have to say such 
 a thing to the son of my oldest friend and comrade, 
 as well as my wife's own nephew, I must henceforth 
 beg to retract the general invitation we were so glad 
 to ofier you, to be constantly with us, and must beg 
 for the future to forbid you from any further intimacy 
 with our children while you remain in this place. 
 
 " Of course you can stay on here at Dresden as you 
 may think fit, and as long as we thought, and had no 
 reason for doubting, that we might thoroughly trust 
 you, we were only too glad to see as much as possible 
 of you. But that footing must now come to an 
 end." 
 
 This was really too much ; in the most earnest 
 terms I could command, I protested and swore to my 
 uncle that I had kept my promise, and had been true 
 to my word. 
 
 So earnestly that, as a gentleman, he professed him- 
 self bound to believe me, though I could see that, in 
 spite of his professions, he was sorely perplexed as to 
 what he was to make of, and how possibly to recon- 
 cile my strong and reiterated denial, with some 
 equally convincing proof which he seemed to think 
 that he had to the contrary.
 
 DE LORME FORBIDS HIS NEPHEW HIS HOUSE. 163 
 
 It was while he still remained silent, as if trying 
 to balance these totally adverse difficulties in his 
 own mind, that, although the door was closed, and 
 there was a tolerably-sized apartment intervening 
 between that in which we were, and Katie's own 
 room beyond, suddenly a piercing scream — a thrilling 
 cry, as if of agony — reached us. 
 
 ** Come as far as her door yourself, and then you 
 may learn the grounds of my doubts and accusa- 
 tions," said the Colonel, sternly ; " and then, sir, let 
 us see whether you can, with the same unblushing 
 confidence, stick to your denial." 
 
 The door of the inner room was ajar ; as it had, 
 I suppose, been left by my aunt, who had rushed in 
 to Katie, on hearing the same loud cry with which 
 we had been so greatly startled, so that, without 
 quite seeing into the room itself, we could distinctly 
 hear the voice of the poor girl, as her cries sometimes 
 rose to an appalling height, and then again, in broken 
 and disjointed sentences and articulations, became 
 lowered to a moaning whisper. 
 
 " Save him ! oh, save him ! Oh, if you will only 
 spare Frank, I will give my life, my soul, everything 
 I have in the world to save him !" 
 
 And so she would go on, repeating over and over 
 again ; then of a sudden she changed to more inco- 
 
 M 2
 
 164 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 lierent ravings, though always harping on the same 
 wild idea of some tremendous danger impending on me. 
 
 "Oh, Mr. Gorles! Mr. Gorles! Mr. Gorles ! Spare 
 him, oh, pray spare my poor Frank ! I will 
 serve you, I will slave for you, I will follow you 
 wherever you wish, if you will only spare Frank, and 
 not drag him down, down, down with you below 
 there," and then she would begin all over again. 
 
 " Yes, my very life, my soul, if you will not hurt 
 him ! But Frank and I shall never, never, never be 
 the same with each other again !" 
 
 Then her voice gradually quieted off into a low, 
 running moan of "Never, never, never again the same." 
 
 It was the most awfully painful thing to hear, most 
 perfectly heart-rending. Of course, I could not hope 
 to be allowed to go in to see her, though how I longed 
 and how much my very soul quite ached to be allowed 
 to do so no one can tell. 
 
 All of a sudden, as I stood there overwhelmed with 
 grief, and my head pressed tightly against the wall, I 
 cannot tell why, but I felt an almost insuperable desire 
 to turn round upon my uncle as he was leaning on 
 the other side quite choking with sobs of agony, poor 
 old fellow ! to seize him by the throat and knock his 
 head against the door-post; the longing to do so was 
 so intense, that it required a positively strong mental
 
 BE LORME FORBIDS HIS NEPHEW HIS HOUSE. 165 
 
 struggle and efibrt to subdue the feeling while it 
 lasted. 
 
 When curiously enough pat to my very thoughts, 
 T\ild and evil as they were, poor Katie again began 
 ii'om low moaning to rave at the top of her voice. 
 
 "No, no, no, you will never make him do that, wicked 
 as you are, and great as your horrible power may be 
 over him, you will never make him raise his hand 
 against my father !" 
 
 Now, was not that a most wonderful coincidence ? 
 it struck me all of a heap at the moment, and often and 
 often have I thought of it ever since. However, instead 
 of yielding to the devilish impulses I had felt work- 
 ing within me, I took upon myself gently to lead the 
 poor old gentleman away, and we went and sat down 
 in quite the farthest window of the farther room, hav- 
 ing shut close all the doors behind us, as far as pos- 
 sible out of hearing of the sad and dreadful sound. 
 
 " Frank, my dear boy,'' said he again after some 
 minutes' silence, " you have now heard for yourself, 
 and your aunt tells me that all through last niglit, 
 indeed I heard her myself while I was there, that our 
 poor child's thoughts were wandering, and that she 
 was crying out in the same way that you have just 
 now listened to, about a lock of hair she has parted 
 with.
 
 166 MELCHIOR GOBIES. 
 
 " You must give me back that hair, for even if she 
 recovers and is in mercy spared to us, anything of 
 that sort ; — you know, of course, what I mean — any en- 
 gagement between you and her is utterly and absolutely 
 out of the question ; rather than that should happen I 
 would see my child lying a corpse upon that bed on 
 which she is now tossing. 
 
 " You must give me up that piece of hair, if you 
 please, here at once." 
 
 " Uncle, I have never asked for and never received 
 anything of the sort from Katie, though if she had 
 not been so suddenly taken ill that evening as she 
 
 was, I might perhaps have hoped but I cannot 
 
 give you up what I have never had." 
 
 *' Sir," he replied, " it is too horrible thus to be 
 obliged to doubt the word of anybody, but it is now 
 a question between either your truth or my own senses. 
 
 " Which am I to credit ? Do you think I am " 
 
 and he stopped himself; "do you think I am a down- 
 right fool ? What am I to believe and think from 
 the way and wild words in which you yourself have 
 just now heard that poor girl coupling your name 
 with Gorles, dreaming, as she evidently is, and rav- 
 ing in her distracted fancies on the imaginary affinity 
 between him and yourself? From whom but yourself 
 alone could that idea have ever entered her young
 
 DE LORME FORBIDS HIS NEPHEW HIS HOUSE. 167 
 
 head ? — you yourself told me that no one else ever 
 knew it ; — and now as to this lock of hair, which you 
 in an equally barefaced manner deny." 
 
 " Then call me a liar at once, sir !" I said, springing 
 up. I was indignant at being thus disbelieved, and again 
 I felt the awful inward impulse to rush at him with 
 the chair in my hand, or any other heavy implement I 
 could have laid hold of in my wrath, to crush him to 
 the ground and there trample on him. I felt I should 
 have liked to have sucked, yes, and licked up his 
 very blood. 
 
 My own seemed on fire, as if in another minute it 
 would boil and seethe over so as to pour out of my eyes 
 and ears or come oozing out of my very finger ends. 
 Thank heaven, the horrible feeling was but mo- 
 mentary ! 
 
 Though a fine np-standing old fellow as he was, 
 tall, hearty as myself, and a soldier every iuch of him, I 
 really think he was scared at my wild appearance, and 
 hardly knew what to expect. 
 
 Though, as I say, thank heaven, I checked myself 
 in time, perhaps it was because the thought then 
 first struck me of his extraordinary likeness to his 
 daughter Katie as she had looked when at the top of 
 that Wolfshiigel mount ; so as he faced me, gazing 
 sternly at me, holding himself proudly up to his full
 
 168 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 height, I began to feel abashed and ashamed of 
 myself. 
 
 " I beg your pardon, Uncle George, but from any 
 
 other man in the world " He held out his hand 
 
 to me, and said quietly and kindly, " I must, and I will 
 try to believe in your truth, my boy, and doubt my 
 own senses, but God only knows how to account for 
 it ;" and I remarked the same strange, half-searching, 
 half-pitying expression in his countenance I have 
 mentioned once before, when he asked me that odd 
 question about my grandfather. 
 
 " Uncle," said I, " if in spite of yourself you can- 
 not believe me, and though again I solemnly swear to 
 you that I have told you nothing but the truth, I sup- 
 pose you cannot, and there is no help for it ; but de- 
 pend upon it that although you before chose so utterly 
 and entirely to scout the idea of influences, sujjerna- 
 tural and unaccountable influences, which I could bear 
 testimony to from my own painful experience, but of 
 which you were so incredulous, and even quite angry 
 with me for asserting, — though I have strictly kept 
 my promise to you, and never once come near the 
 subject to Katie — yet you may depend upon it that 
 the same sort of power has been at work here, and is 
 at work now, and so some day you will find it " 
 
 " Silence, boy!" he cried, " silence, I command you I"'
 
 DE LOEME FORBIDS HIS NEPHEW HIS HOUSE. 169 
 
 and again he glared with his stern look fully upon me, 
 "and never dare mention such utter nonsense in my 
 presence again." 
 
 Well, Uncle as he was (hy marriage at least), and 
 kind as he really had been to me, that was rather 
 more than I was prepared to put up with ; so, taking 
 up my hat, and with a sort of formal bow of adieu 
 at the door, I just "made tracks;" my indignation 
 determining me never to set foot within that house 
 again, unless I received an ample apology for the in- 
 sults I had undergone : yet all the while longing to 
 lay myself down like a dog at the door where that 
 poor child was raving on her sick bed within.
 
 170 MELGHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER XVI. 
 
 TARAXACUM. 
 
 Elank enough, as you may imagine, was the state of 
 mind in which I started, I neither knew nor cared 
 whither exactly, from the house in Llittichau Strasse, 
 after the scene I have described to you ; when whom 
 should I run against, or rather be overtaken by, but 
 that strange fellow Lyons, whom I daresay you may 
 remember at Eton — Lyons, at Evans's — or De Lyons 
 rather, he became by royal patent while he was there — 
 (why on earth people should consider it a swell thing 
 to stick on a little French part of speech, pronoun, 
 preposition, which is it ? to their proper names, I can- 
 not think) — but at school he more generally went by 
 the name of " Taraxacum," which I have always looked 
 upon as the best-originated nickname on record. 
 
 His sponsor at his baptism having bestowed upon 
 him the name of Daniel, it was a matter of course 
 that he should immediately, upon assuming the afore- 
 said aristocratic prefix to his name, be called Dan-de-
 
 TARAXACUM. 171 
 
 lion. The joke was too palpable to escape the most 
 infantine capacity ; but when some fellow looking out 
 some hard word in his lexicon, hit upon the Greek 
 name for that humble weed, great was his triumph 
 among jokers; as, saluting our friend as Taraxacum, 
 on the spot, the name clung to him from that moment, 
 ever thereafter to be associated with his memory in 
 the minds of his school contemporaries. 
 
 He was always one of the queerest, most original 
 fellows I ever knew (one summer half he was in my 
 boat, and so, though at diflfereut houses, and in diffe- 
 rent removes, he and I were thrown rather thickly 
 together). He was as a boy a wild, restless, dare- 
 devil sort of character, up to any sort of mischief, or 
 any lark — but also devoted to experiments in natural 
 philosophy, and those sort of games. He used to 
 galvanize dead frogs and rats, and nearly killed one 
 of the maids at his dame's by fixing an awfully over- 
 charged electric wire to his door-handle ; indeed I am 
 not sure that it was not for that very feat, or else for 
 slaying and anatomizing his dame's favourite cat, in his 
 zealous pursuit of science, that his Eton career came 
 to an untimely end. 
 
 " Both causes were, I remember, at the time alleged 
 — anyhow he left suddenly under some difficulty of the 
 sort, and when I met him again, I recalled the fact of
 
 I7i MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 having heard that he had gone to Heidelberg, or Bonn, 
 or one of those German universities. 
 
 When I first fell in with him at Dresden, it was at 
 the fencing-school, which I have, as I think, already 
 mentioned to you. I certainly should never have re- 
 cognised my ancient friend, and did not, even when he 
 rapturously hailed me by my name, until he told me 
 himself that he was the original ' Taraxacum Lyons. 
 He had so thoroughly contrived to transmogrify his 
 essentially British countenance into the most ultra- 
 German of German students, with his long pointed 
 moustache and chin-piece, rum little coloured cap, 
 coatee cut off short behind, like a singed cock-sparrow, 
 and his nose stuck on with long straps of sticking- 
 plaster, all complete. 
 
 "Holloa! Lambard!" he hailed me then, again on 
 this occasion coming up from behind in Luttichau 
 Strasse, and hooking on to my arm. "Why, bless my 
 stars ! do you know the family who live in that house, 
 out of which I saw you just now coming ? Oh, most 
 fortunate of youths ! oh, you lucky dog ! how did you 
 manage it? — that is where tbe prettiest girl in all 
 Dresden lives. I have myself been beating about the 
 bush these months past to get an introduction there, 
 but never could contrive it anyhow ; but now at last 
 will fortune favour the most patient of her hangers-on.
 
 TARAXACUM. 173 
 
 (I mean of fortune's, not the young lady's), inasmuch 
 as she has thus put it into the power of you, my 
 ancient school-fellow and friend, to serve your most 
 obedient ; and by a timely introduction to your re- 
 spected acquaintance not only to allow him personally 
 to establish a friendly footing where his heart has for 
 some time prospectively settled itself ; but also have 
 yourself the happiness of feeling that you have 
 rescued one of the once merry companions of your 
 boyhood's joyous days from despair, the fatal conse- 
 quences of which would, but for this your welcome 
 aid, be hard-pressing and inevitable/' 
 
 "You need not go on in that style," I said, 
 quietly, but rather sternly ; " I am myself not in 
 the humour for it now; the young lady you allude 
 to happens at this moment to be very dangerously 
 ill ; and even if that were not the case, her family are 
 not particularly anxious to increase their acquaint- 
 ance by receiving every fresh comer who may take 
 it into his head to wish for an introduction to 
 them." 
 
 " Well, there, don't cut up so rough, old fellow," 
 he answered, quite imperturbably ; " if you wont, you 
 wont ; but as to their being so inaccessible, I only 
 know there was an audacious little vagabond here 
 before you came, named Gorles — why, by-the-bye, you
 
 174 MELCEIOR G0RLE8. 
 
 knew him well enough yourself — of course you did, 
 that little dwarf fellow who was at your own tutor's 
 at Eton, and swamped our hoat for us against 
 Windsor Bridge that time he came down as sitter, 
 and you and I were swished together next morning 
 with the rest of the crew, for heing drunk, which we 
 were not ; — why, of course you must remember him 
 well enough : well, when he was here he managed 
 to insinuate himself into an intimacy in that quarter : 
 how he originally began I never could make out — by 
 some fluke, I suppose ; while (just like my luck) 
 though I have continually planned all sorts of dodges, 
 I never could get a chance. 
 
 "At one time I thought I was going to do it by 
 making friends with the young one, the school-boy ; 
 but Gorles, who was always as jealous as a stoat, had 
 him so thoroughly under his thumb, body and soul, 
 I found that it was no go. 
 
 " Joking apart, I think you might take pity upon a 
 poor fellow who has so long been desperately in love, 
 as I have been, most honourably too, — all correct, 
 you know, honour bright ; and you need not be afraid 
 of my disgracing your introduction, for when I am in 
 decent society I can behave myself as well as anybody 
 I know, at a pinch. Well, there, I wont ask any 
 more ; but, seriously, my dear Lambard, if you are
 
 TARAXACUM. 175 
 
 such a real friend of the family, you ought to keep a 
 sharp look out on Master Gorles, going on as he does 
 ■with that young boy ; and though I say it, with all 
 respect, on his pretty sister too, for now he is come 
 back to Dresden " 
 
 " Is Gorles now here in Dresden ?" I cut in sharply, 
 interrupting him ; " by Jove, tell me where I can find 
 him. But in the meantime allow me, De Lvons, to 
 acquaint you with a fact of which you seem not to 
 have the slightest idea, that the young lady you speak 
 of so glibly, in fact the family from whose door you 
 saw me coming out, are among the nearest relations 
 I have ; and apro2JOS to your very unwelcome remarks, 
 Ithink it fair to tell you that I have already received some 
 intimation from that boy, who is my own first cousin, 
 of some very strange scenes in which, as it now occurs 
 to me from his description, you yourself, as well as 
 Gorles, have taken a rather prominent part, and of 
 which you can now, perhaps, give me some further 
 explanation." 
 
 " Your own first cousin ! Oh, by the tombs of my 
 forefathers, you don't mean it! Whew !" he whistled 
 out a series of notes of admiration; "then I can 
 tell you, my dear Lambard, that it is a devilish lucky 
 thing you are here, just in time. Your own first 
 cousins ! And that beautiful girl, too !"
 
 176 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 He very naturally jumped at that conclusion, on 
 which, of course, it was no business of mine to un- 
 deceive him. 
 
 "Then I will just tell you what it is, Lambard : 
 though you may, I daresay, think me rather a rum 
 chap, I have liked you from the first day I knew 
 you, and you elected me into your boat at Eton ; 
 and though it was for so long that we did not happen 
 to run against one another, I was, upon my word, 
 quite deuced glad to see you again, when we met so 
 unexpectedly; in short, though you just now seemed 
 disinclined to act like a man and a brother, that is, 
 an old schoolfellow, to me when I suggested as much, 
 I will yet return good, for evil, and just give you a 
 friendly hint. 
 
 " That Master Gorles has been trying it on pretty 
 considerably in that quarter ; and, indeed, I may tell 
 you further, in confidence, has come back here to 
 Dresden, only three or four days since, for the express 
 purpose of even further trying on what, even before I 
 knew that they were your relations, or that any friend 
 of mine happened to have such special interest in the 
 matter, had struck me as carrying things to much 
 greater lengths than any circumstances can possibly 
 justify. 
 
 " Indeed, I have already sufi'ered no small trouble
 
 TARAXACUM. 177 
 
 from qualms of conscience on the subject, although we 
 all know that in the deep researches of science one 
 cannot afford to he too particular about the private 
 feelings of the patients on whom we experimentalize, 
 and establish our theories ; but still when it comes 
 to beguiling a young boy out at night from his 
 parents' roof, or inducing by whatever means, whether 
 scientific or otherwise, any well brought up young 
 lady to come alone, and unprotected to the rooms of 
 any single man, and that man a stranger — although 
 not happening ever to have had a sister of my own, 
 in which case I might, perhaps, have been a better 
 judge in such matters than I can now pretend to be — 
 still, I say that I think, even in the cause of science, 
 it is carrying matters a little too far." 
 
 "What do you mean?" I gasped. " What do you dare 
 to insinuate?" — and I only wonder that I did not 
 then and there knock him head over heels, without 
 giving him time for any further explanation. 
 
 " Oh," he said, " it has never yet happened — that 
 is to the young lady, at least — though I know the idea 
 has been discussed and intended ; and the little bov, 
 who seems to have let you into the secret — I wonder 
 he dared — was not hurt or even frightened by the 
 experiments we had with him — he is a plucky young 
 beggar, and awful saucy, I suspect. Still, though I 
 
 VOL. I. N
 
 178 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 myself was there, I am sure I felt all the time that it 
 was not altogether quite right; and as to further 
 lengths, I have even hefore, as I say, I knew that 
 you, my friend, were so interested in the matter, 
 made up my mind to take no active part, though 
 I could hardly know how to prevent them. Be- 
 sides, to tell the honest truth, even if I thought 
 there was any use in my interfering — which there 
 would not be — I do not want just at this particular 
 time to quarrel with the parties concerned, who meet 
 together in pursuit of science — as the Professor, who 
 is our leading spirit, has promised us a seance, and 
 
 actually a Personal interview with the Well, with 
 
 a very great personage, whom it is as well perhaps not 
 to name, but who, if he can really be induced to come, 
 why, I should like of all things to be present at the 
 interview. The Professor declares that it is possible, 
 and that, with common prudence, there is nothing to 
 fear in the experiment ; and I can only say that, though 
 very wonderful, he has always hitherto been as good 
 as his word, and performed all that he has undertaken 
 — though, as I have seen myself, there have been 
 already some very strange aud startling things occa-' 
 sionally amongst his undertakings. 
 
 " I do not know, but perhaps if you would like very 
 much to see him too, I might get the Professor's
 
 TARAXACUM. 179 
 
 leave to bring you with me. It will be an oppor- 
 tunity you may never liave again, and an event you 
 will probably remember for the rest of your life ; the 
 only thing is, as he tells us, to be very civil but firm — 
 that is, to show no sort of fear or agitation during the 
 necessary forms or ceremony of invitation, and while 
 he is actually present — and I know you have pluck 
 
 enough, if any one in this world has, to face him 
 
 We wont, as I said, mention names, but I suppose 
 you can guess who I mean ?' 
 
 N 2
 
 180 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER XVII. 
 
 DE LYONS AND HIS SCIENTIFIC FRIENDS. 
 
 Struck as I was with an evident vein of serious 
 meaning beneath all this wild talk, coupled with and 
 corroborative as it was to my mind of all that I had 
 heard from young Ferdy ; it occurred to me that by 
 making up to this strange genius I might gain ad- 
 mittance for myself into the clique of these scientifics, 
 spiritualists, or whatever they called themselves, and 
 thus stand a better chance of confronting, if not 
 defeating, little Gorles in his machinations, or at any 
 rate, by my mere presence, of preventing his even at- 
 tempting any of his tricks. Yet all the while I could 
 not, as I have told you, have defined exactly in my own 
 mind, what it was that I thus dreaded and expected. 
 
 Acting then on this idea, and having invited 
 " Taraxacmn" into my lodgings, at the door of which 
 we had for some time been carrying on our interesting 
 conversation ; and finding my friend confidentially 
 enough inclined, I took upon myself to inquire how
 
 DE LYONS AND HIS SCIENTIFIC FRIENDS. 181 
 
 on earth he had originally contrived to get himself 
 mixed up with such a queer set of fellows. Upon 
 which he, without the slightest reserve, gave a full 
 account of himself and his chosen companions. 
 
 " You see," said he, " the fact is, that even as a 
 boy I was always fond of experimental philosophy, 
 chemistry, physical science, and addicted to dabbling 
 to any extent in those sort of pursuits ; and so having 
 fallen in with a genial spirit or two among the 
 students at our university, when I first joined that 
 respectable institution, I brought letters of introduc- 
 tion last year when I visited Leipsic to Professor 
 Zauber, who was then lecturing at that city. There 
 is scarcely, I believe, a city or town in Europe in 
 which he has not lectured and given public seances 
 — from many of which, Kome, Naples, Petersburg, 
 and I rather believe Paris, he has had short notice to 
 quit in consequence; — and constant correspondents 
 he has all over the world. Well, besides being, as I 
 now tell you, myself really much interested in those 
 deep sciences to which the Professor is specially 
 devoted, it was chiefly through his recommendation 
 that I became appointed foreign correspondent to 
 those eminently spiritualistic journals, the ' Penny 
 Sunday Medium,' and the ' Biologist's Weekly Maga- 
 zine.' Contributing besides occasionally to other
 
 182 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 leading scientific papers and periodicals in London, I 
 am obliged to keep myself constantly aufait upon all 
 the most interesting metaphysical facts, which from my 
 friendship with the Professor I enjoy constant oppor- 
 tunities of witnessiog : the fact is that I originally 
 began by supplying my weekly budget with many 
 anecdotes and embellishments of my own invention ; 
 but as I seriously went into the matter I soon disco- 
 vered that there was no need of any such dishonest 
 demands upon my imagination, as the actual facts 
 and results of experiments I have myself witnessed, 
 and assisted in, far exceed in wonder any inventions 
 I should ever have dared to venture upon, or 
 until I really had myself seen them, ever had an 
 idea of. 
 
 " A fellow must live, you know, and though it may 
 perhaps seem rather a low form for an Etonian to 
 become a 'penny-a-liner' before he is turned two-and- 
 twenty, yet I have already met one or two of our 
 old school-fellows lower down in their luck, even than 
 myself. A stoker on a Belgian railway engine, and 
 a marker at a Frankfort billiard-room, are, I flatter 
 myself, a peg or two below contributing to the 
 diffusion of great scientific truths, which may before 
 long command the attention of the most learned and 
 renowned societies in Europe, leading probably to
 
 DE LYONS AND HIS SCIENTIFIC FRIENDS. 1S3 
 
 some of the deepest discoveries of Creation and Nature 
 ever as yet unrolled." 
 
 " ' Hear ! hear !' I cried, though I didn't laugh or 
 sneer at him, as you, sir, do at me if a little extra en- 
 thusiastic. 
 
 " I have," he continued, " unfortunately come to a 
 slight difference of opinion ^Yitll my governor, a worthy 
 man in his way, but not always reasonable, and, he 
 having in a very mean way thought fit to stop the sup- 
 plies, I am forced to the truly despicable condition of 
 trying to earn my own living somehow. My temporary 
 difficulty with the home department is the principal 
 reason of my spending my vacation in this place in- 
 stead of in the parsonage house of Bramton, in the 
 county of Wilts, as I ought naturally to be doing, if 
 the rector there was only a more dutiful parent. 
 
 " I find it more convenient to go about in this queer 
 toggery, which I know you do not altogether admire, 
 for I have before now noticed you eyeing me over; but 
 I have three or four very good reasons for doing so, 
 in which I think you will agree when you hear them. 
 
 "To begin with, I have just now, as it happens, got 
 nothing to wear, and thougli the natives here are 
 barbarians it is true, yet they would I fear hardly 
 recognise the true primaeval dignity of nature in its 
 purity, more than would be the case even at home in
 
 184 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 London, supposing the climate allowed of any such 
 unpretending simplicity of costume. 
 
 "Besides that, I have often found this style of ' get 
 up' to be an advantage in falling in witli and making 
 acquaintance with travelling compatriots, which I like 
 doing sometimes, particularly if I happen to notice 
 any nice-looking girls in the party, by stepping grace- 
 fully forward and volunteering my humble services as 
 interpreter in any little difficulty they may have in- 
 curred from their deficiency in the language. 
 
 *' On such occasions, you see, the German student 
 and romantic stranger is received with pleasure and 
 gratitude ; when if they only suspected that he was 
 only an Englishman out of luck, in ninety-nine cases 
 out of a hundred he would be snubbed and looked 
 upon with suspicion as an impudent intruder, 
 
 "But passing as I do for a genuine native it is 
 astonishing how my polite advances are received, and 
 many a good dinner and pleasant evening have I 
 enjoyed both here in Dresden and in other cities with 
 charming people on whom I never set eyes before or 
 since. 
 
 " It is such fun to be complimented upon the asto- 
 nishing correctness of one's English, which I take care 
 when I think of it, to intersperse with an occasional 
 dash of German expressions or idiom ; and the warm
 
 DE LYONS AND HIS SCIENTIFIC FRIENDS. 185 
 
 invitations I have received to various country houses, 
 whenever I shall find my way to England, would I 
 am sure if properly arranged keep me going on the 
 fat of the land for a twelve month or two. 
 
 " I mean some day to pick up a travelling heiress, in 
 return for whose consols or broad acres I can bestow 
 my title and coronet, and so make the lucky fair one, 
 whoever she may be, the proudest and happiest of 
 women as GrafFen, or I am not sure it shall not be 
 Princess, von der Lowe." 
 
 "Why don't you make it Von Taraxacum at once ?" 
 I could not resist saying. 
 
 " Well, that is not a bad idea, Der GrafiFe von 
 Taraxacum, with my crest of a yawning lion over it, 
 would look stunning on a glazed card, wouldn't it ? 
 
 "But to return to our select little society, or rather 
 clique, now that I have given you this full account of 
 my most humble self. Charlatans or humbugs you 
 may, like many others who know nothing about the 
 matter, consider us; but I am very sure that if once you 
 come to see and take an interest in the marvellous 
 secrets and facts of nature which are the result of our 
 studies and practical experiments, I defy you to leave 
 off, even though you may, as I have, occasional qualms 
 as to whether it is all right and lawful, or not perhaps 
 running a trifling risk of putting yourself immediately
 
 186 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 into the power of a certain person, of whom the less we 
 talk the better; but once fairly launched in these 
 marvellous pursuits of science, even such qualms 
 (which I find lessen a good deal as one becomes more 
 used to them), will not stop one from eagerly seeking 
 to learn more and more of the vast powers and strange 
 truths thus revealed to those who boldly go in for them. 
 Then there is the Professor who, for one half he 
 knows and can do, would a hundred years since in 
 the days of ignorance, have been tortured and burnt 
 for a wizard. 
 
 " The next is a Frenchman, one Gustave Kanard, 
 who by the same token knows you, and swears you 
 once saved his life for him at Cambridge. How 
 very oddly things come round! He was talking 
 about you, and quoting you as an extraordinary speci- 
 men of animal strength and courage, only last night, 
 and just the very fellow we wanted for a certain extra- 
 ordinary purpose ; when Gorles, who, as it now strikes 
 me, seemed very much put out at hearing you were 
 still here, chose to pooh-pooh Frenchy, and even hinting 
 that you were no better than a coward, said that as to 
 your strength he had the best of reasons for knowing 
 all about that, and that he had himself once fought 
 and licked you at school ; at which we all laughed most 
 awfully, as well me might, till the little dwarf became
 
 DE LYONS AND MIS SCIENTIFIC FRIENDS. 187 
 
 as savage as" a cat in a coal-hole. Besides these, 
 there is a fellow student of mine, Max Sniffel, who 
 like myself, goes in for any sort of science, though 
 alchemy is what his notions chiefly run upon. 
 
 " We five are all that are here in Dresden at present, 
 though there are three or four others who keep up a 
 correspondence with us, and occasionally attend our 
 meetings if they happen to he passing through, or 
 staying here for a short time as they sometimes may 
 chance to he. 
 
 "As to Gorles, whom I can see hy your face when 
 1 mentioned his name, you do not love much more 
 than we do; — he is still just as bumptious and dis- 
 agreeable as he always was when an Eton fellow, and 
 therefore we would just as soon he kept himself away 
 from our little meetings, were it not that the Professor 
 declares that, though like every one else, he per- 
 sonally dislikes him, his presence and help are of great 
 value to us, as he is more naturally endowed with 
 unusually vast powers of the odyle and magnetic forces 
 than anybody he has ever yet met with. He tells us 
 that to his own personal knowledge, Gorles's mother, 
 who was well known in her day to the then very 
 few followers of Alesmer and M. Cazotte, the famous 
 Parisian clairvoyant, as an extraordinary spiritual 
 medium, ran away from her lawful husband, who
 
 188 MELCHIOR GOELES. 
 
 "was an honest, unsuspecting conveyancer — or in 
 some such line of business — with a Polish refugee, a 
 very queer character, who was at one time a good deal 
 received in society in London, although he was com- 
 monly reported to be a 'Vampire,' Of that faux 
 jpas our little friend was the result — such may or 
 may not be really the case, but the Professor, though 
 he sometimes announces the most extraordinary 
 facts, generally knows what he is talking about. 
 Anyhow he cultivates Gorles, and hopes through 
 him to bring about that friendly, therefore quite 
 harmless, interview with the great and terrible 
 personage in 'propria persona whom I have already 
 hinted at. Indeed, if you must know, it was while 
 discussing that very matter, that your own name and 
 character came upon the tayis as having it in your 
 power, if you would only consent, to be of most im- 
 mense assistance to us." 
 
 " Thank you very much for the association," I re- 
 plied ; " but in what way, may I ask, am I likely to 
 contribute to the success of your satanic reunion ^" 
 
 " Hush !" said Taraxacum, glancing round him 
 with a scared look, " never mention names ! How 
 can you be so dreadfully indiscreet ? 
 
 " Why, the way we came to be talking about you 
 was in this wise : the Professor, whether out of some
 
 BE LYONS AND HIS SCIENTIFIC FRIENDS. 189 
 
 of those old worm-eaten manuscripts and black-letter 
 folios he is always pouring over, or whether he may 
 have hit upon it by his own wonderfully acute powers 
 of thought and reasoning, I am not sure, but somehow 
 or other he has arrived at a conclusion satisfactory to 
 his own mind, on which he has founded a, as I be- 
 lieve, hitherto undiscovered or certainly long-forgotten 
 theory — not wholly dissimilar, but going far beyond 
 the doctrines of Salverte, and other writers on psycho- 
 logy. Those professed phrenologists, shallow fellows 
 as they often are, can after all undoubtedly to a great 
 extent judge of and individualize characters by 
 the cranial developments, or, in plain language, 
 * bumps,' and indentations of the heads of mankind. 
 Now upon that science our Professor has advanced 
 by long chalks — having hit upon the means of de- 
 fining and even exactly -weighing the quantity as well 
 as quality of each feeling, disposition, propensity, or 
 other trait of any individual character, of the interior 
 working of which the external developments, or say 
 bumps are the result. He can actually gauge your 
 self-reliance, for instance, or your veneration, or de- 
 structiveness, or any other peculiar characteristic, just 
 as an exciseman will gauge the spirit of gin or whisky. 
 You can accurately measure air, you know; or the 
 weight, strength, or quantity of steam.
 
 190 MELOHIOR GORLES. 
 
 " The Professor is now trying experiments founded 
 this upon theory, from which he looks forward to be- 
 coming the happy author of enormous benefit to his 
 fellow- creatures, which is really more reward to him 
 than all the glory and pride of philosophical discovery 
 and power, vast as that is, to the few who are fortunate 
 enough to reap it deservedly; but he is, I must also 
 tell you, in all he does one of the most benevolent and 
 philanthropic of men. 
 
 " The benefit he looks forward to is, when once this 
 theory is thoroughly established, simple, though per- 
 haps from its novelty, a little startling ; for he looks 
 forward to immensely improving the general average 
 of human nature, and bringing to almost absolute 
 perfection the characters and dispositions of mankind 
 in general ; for instance, according to this most 
 wonderful discovery, half a dozen friends, we will 
 say, may agree together to amalgamate, and by care- 
 fully comparing their individual superfluities or defi- 
 ciencies of temper or propensities, may interchange 
 and transfer from one to another such characteristics 
 as they may have to spare, in return for proportions 
 of others they may happen to require. Thus the timid 
 man may receive a portion of the exuberance of spirit 
 from the over-rash, to the mutual improvement of both 
 parties ; or a stingy fellow impart some of his over-
 
 DE LYONS AND HIS SCIENTIFIC FRIENDS. 191 
 
 carefulness to the spendthrift, receiving in exchange 
 some of the other's superahuudant generosity. 
 
 " It is not at all a bad idea, is it ? But the Pro- 
 fessor hopes to go even a step further still, that is to 
 be able to borrow and return certain quantities of 
 character, of course with the consent of the original 
 possessor. The great difficulty will be the immense 
 amount of confidence and trust it will require between 
 man and man ; but only conceive what an advantage 
 it would be, if lazy or not inclined to go yourself, you 
 could lend a friend, less fortunately endowed by 
 nature, your own good ear and musical taste, for the 
 night at the opera, just as you might your opera- 
 glasses, to be returned Avhen done with ; or could add 
 your amount of physical pluck to his own allowance, 
 for a hard, day with the hounds ! 
 
 "It was on the question ofthatveryquality of 'pluck' 
 that the Frenchman mentioned you. He happened to 
 see you one day coming away from the fencing school, 
 and instantly was for rushing after his noble champion 
 and deliverer, as he called you, in some civil war or 
 revolution, according to his account, in which he seems 
 to have embroiled himself at Cambridge ; but as if he 
 had overtaken and kissed you in the street, as he cer- 
 tainly would have done, you would probably have 
 knocked his head off, and so debarred yourself from
 
 192 MEL CHI OR GORLES. 
 
 ever recoguising his identity, we restrained his ardour, 
 and you went on out of sight." 
 
 I did call to mind when Taraxacum thus mentioned 
 the fact, a foreigner who was hanging ahout one hunt- 
 ing term up at Cambridge, though I never knew much 
 of him, but remembered meeting him once or twice 
 out at supper, and seeing him make a most extraordi- 
 nary exhibition out with the Drag. Some of the men 
 used to keep him up there chiefly, I believe, for the 
 fun of chaffing him, and giving him mounts on the 
 most unruly brutes of horses they could find, with the 
 hounds or the " herring-dogs ;" and in one of the 
 annual November Town and Gown rows, I one night 
 found the unfortunate " Mossoo," as they used to call 
 him, mistaken for a University man, sitting in the 
 gutter in front of Trinity-gate, which had been shut 
 against him, and surrounded by a whole levee of infu- 
 riated cads, pelting him with dirt and stones. I really 
 almost think they would have killed him in a few 
 minutes, if I and some others had not happened to 
 come up All Saints'-passage at the nick of time, and 
 rescued him from the Philistines. 
 
 "Yes, that's it," answered Taraxacum; "that 
 rescue, and your rowing, and your hard riding, are 
 subjects on which it is a caution to listen to him. 
 You are, according to him, a derai-god, a regular
 
 I)E LYONS AND UIS SCIENTIFIC FRIENDS. 193 
 
 Hercules ; and when the Professor was seriously 
 lamenting that the one thing needful in the careful 
 preparations for the remarkable seance he has pro- 
 mised us, was, if possible, the infusion of more animal 
 courage amongst us, to carry us well and safely through 
 the ordeal, as I suppose it may without any disrespect 
 be truly called, then it was that Frenchy proposed to 
 put the Professor's own system in force, and either get 
 you to assist, or, if you objected to that, to kindly lend 
 us the use of your courage for the evening, which, as it 
 will probably be late, and I know you keep regular 
 hours, you really wont want while you are in bed and 
 asleep, and you shall have it back all right again and 
 unimpaired in the morning." 
 
 The favour he asked was really so unusual, not to 
 say astonishing, especially considering at that time 
 our very slight acquaintance, that I could only say that 
 I must take time to consider of it. It was not until 
 after my friend had taken himself off, and I had turned 
 into bed, that it occurred to me, that I had never after 
 all elicited from him the exact sort or nature of the 
 schemes which Gorles was trying on against Katie's 
 peace and welfare. But I really had been so carried 
 away with his extraordinary account of the Professor 
 and his supernatural powers ; besides, even while he 
 so briefly alluded to her, friendly as he expressed hiin- 
 VOL. I. o
 
 194 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 self, I could hardly bear to hear her name, or at least 
 the mention of her in his unhallowed mouth ; and as 
 we had strayed off further and further, felt a repug- 
 nance to returning to the original subject of our 
 conversation.
 
 195 
 
 CHAPTEE XVIII. 
 
 WOE TO THE HOUSE OF DE LORME ! 
 
 The next day, and the next, I called more than once 
 at the door of Ltittichau Strasse to make inquiries after 
 Katie ; the accounts v^ere always the same, — bad as 
 bad could be. 
 
 I did not like to go in, after the scene I had had 
 with my uncle; I did not seem to care about seeing 
 him, only perhaps, as it would have been, to increase 
 his troubles and add to his bitter distress. And as to 
 my aunt, she was all day and night in the poor girl's 
 room, for having married the Colonel when Katie was 
 still quite a little child, she was, I will so far say for 
 her, every bit as fond of, and wrapt up in her, as if she 
 had been her own daughter. 
 
 Only at last, on the second afternoon, she came out 
 to the sick chamber door and sent for me to come up, 
 when I had almost insisted upon hearing from herself 
 how Katie was going on. 
 
 She could hardly at first speak to me, and looked 
 
 o 2
 
 196 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 SO wretchedly sad, and, as I could not help feeling, re- 
 proachfully at me, that even in my grief I felt selfishly 
 hurt, and said : " No one can be more miserably cast 
 down than I am, at this dreadful trial which is sent 
 
 upon let me say, us, dear aunt, and include myself, 
 
 as if I were even a closer relation than I actually am, 
 for indeed I love her as much or more than a cousin 
 or even any brother could. I feel it, I say, as deeply 
 and anxiously as any of you ; but you don't think 
 that I have been the cause of this dreadful illness ?" 
 
 " We are all in God's hands, Frank," she said ; " but 
 Katie left this house perfectly well, in full health and 
 spirits ; and you must know best, if any one can, why 
 she came back to us in the evening in the state she 
 did. 
 
 " Both Dr. Snezzer and Dr. Todleben agree that it 
 is the poor darling child's brain that has been affected, 
 and that she must have received some severe mental 
 shock. What is it that you have told her ? Your 
 uncle seems to have some idea ; but is more furiously 
 angry on the subject, even in spite of his natural 
 anxiety and distress, than I have ever known him to 
 be during all the years I have been married to him. 
 He wont tell me, or even let me allude to it, 
 though I am sure, and know that he knows something 
 too dreadful perhaps for me even to know. And how
 
 WOE TO THE HOUSE OF DL LORME! 197 
 
 could you, Frank, so abuse our confidence in you as 
 to dare to even breathe anything so very dreadful as 
 this, whatever it is, must be to an innocent young girl 
 like Katie ? Oh, Frank, Frank, I never would have 
 thought it of you !" and she fell back on to the sofa, 
 crying like — like a " regular good one," you know — 
 was the best simile which my friend Lambard could 
 find after a slight hesitation ; the poetical, for this time 
 at least, seeming to have failed him. 
 
 But he continued : "Indeed, my dear aunt," I re- 
 plied most earnestly, " 1 am quite aware what my uncle 
 suspects and thinks ; and as to anything being veiy 
 dreadful, that there are some things very unaccount- 
 able in this matter, I will grant you ; but to me, were 
 it not that poor Katie's illness and danger entirely 
 prevented any other thought or feeling (of myself 
 particularly), at this present moment, the most dread- 
 ful part to me would be, that an Uncle who has been so 
 kind, and to whom I had really become so fondly at- 
 tached, should doubt my solemn word and truth, and 
 deliberately brand me as a liar — that is something 
 dreadful, if you like. (I know, and felt while I was 
 speaking, what a selfish beggar I was at the time, but 
 of the amount of pain and bitterness which that 
 scene had caused me, you can perhaps have no idea.) 
 
 "But come now," I went on, "to clear myself at least
 
 198 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 in your opinion ; and though I cannot but feel how out 
 of place, and almost sacrilegious it seems even to speak 
 on such a subject at this awful moment, when that 
 poor girl is lying on the other side of that wall strug- 
 gling between life and death — still cannot you, my 
 dearest aunt, as a kind and sensible woman of the 
 world, knowing what young people's thoughts and 
 feelings are, guess and imagine what a young fellow 
 of one-and-twenty might be likely to say to a beautiful 
 and charming girl of eighteen in whose company he 
 had the happiness and good luck to find himself con- 
 stantly thrown ? Though for the matter of that, the 
 very first time I ever saw Katie was enough for me. 
 But all I really did say, aunt, was to tell her how 
 dearly and fondly I loved her, with all a heart's 
 fresh force that had never till then felt or known what 
 love was, and how with your and Uncle George's kind 
 consent "' 
 
 " Never, my dear boy ; my poor, dearest Frank, it 
 never, never can be !" And again she set to work to 
 howl and cry like — " another regular good one," only 
 even worse than before — again at a loss for an 
 adequate simile. 
 
 " Believe me," she went on, " that never, never 
 can be, Frank. Oh, these dreadful family secrets! 
 One knows how it is hard and painful enough to
 
 won TO TEE HOUSE OF BE LORME ! 199 
 
 have to keep any secret of any sort, but these im- 
 portant family ones are I am sure the worst of all. 
 My dear nephew, this misfortune is, as I now feel, 
 our own fault. We ourselves are most to blame ; I 
 see it all now ; indeed, I may say, that I saw it before 
 it occurred ; but when I spoke to and warned your 
 uncle, he only said I was a fool, and that there was 
 no chance of anything of the sort ; that it was, in short, 
 so entirely out of the question, that he never would 
 admit the very thought even of a marriage between 
 his child and yourself. 
 
 "Frank, you may hope to marry many and many 
 as nice a girl (that is, of course I mean to say, one of 
 them), as our darling Katie, who are to be found in 
 the world. Katie herself may, perhaps, be a happy 
 wife to some lucky man, if, when the time comes, and 
 the secret is fairly told to himself and his family, they 
 do not fear the risk, as some people do not ; though I 
 have heard that his first wife's relatives never told the 
 Colonel beforehand. But secret or no secret, this 
 much you shall know, my poor wretched boy, to recon- 
 cile you with what seems now so hard to bear, and yet 
 what will, please God, as you may live on to become 
 older and wiser, cause you hereafter to be thank- 
 ful that your affections should have been so cruelly 
 disappointed. Well, then, for I think under the cir-
 
 200 MELCniOR GORLES. 
 
 cumstauces that it would be positively wrong not to 
 tell you, — you must know that Katie's poor mother, 
 who as you may have heard died when that poor 
 child was born, had had two female keepers holding 
 her down, night and day — and it was in a private 
 lunatic asylum, where she had been for nearly the 
 whole of the three previous months 
 
 "From Katie's earliest childhood tliis secret has 
 always been rigidly kept from the poor girl herself, so 
 as to avoid all chance or fear of affecting or influencing 
 her own mind. The greatest care and every precau- 
 tion have likewise been taken against exciting her in 
 any way ; and so she has happily hitherto grown up 
 perfectly free from the least suspicion or taint of her 
 unfortunate poor mother's malady. 
 
 "Your poor uncle for years had hoped and flattered 
 liimself that the malady was not hereditary; and so her 
 family, ^Yhen upbraided with disguising the truth from 
 liim at the time of his marriage, always persisted in 
 asserting ; but he never could be satisfied to leave well 
 alone, and be contented with thinking that, ' Sufficient 
 to the day is the evil thereof,' but having by some 
 means scented out and established further conclusive 
 evidence, was then almost driven crazy himself by dis- 
 covering that there is no doubt that an uncle of hers, 
 and other near relations, had been lunatics, and that
 
 WOE TO THE HOUSE OF DE LORMEl 201 
 
 her people knew it well enough, hut had most care- 
 fully always kept the truth hushed up, and even 
 denied the fact altogether. 
 
 " You, Frank, had not heen here ten days or a fort- 
 night before I began to see and notice how much you 
 were evidently attracted by our child Katie ; and I then 
 ventured, though I do not often trouble him with all 
 I think and hear, to mention the subject to your 
 uncle, who, as I tell you, snubbed me flatly; I might, 
 indeed, with truth say, rudely. 
 
 " He said that he knew the world, and what young 
 people were, better than I did ; that if left alone, 
 and even encouraged to be much together, such a 
 thing would never enter into either of your heads ; 
 hut if there should appear any restriction or inter- 
 ference in your constant companionship and intimacy 
 with one another, he could assure me that it would be 
 the very way to bring about what was to be so much 
 dreaded. I thought, I must confess, that it was a 
 strange view to take at the time, but your dear uncle, 
 like all other men, always thinks he knows best about 
 everything ; so having fairly said my say, I could only 
 fold my hands submissively, and hold my tongue as I 
 had been bid, and secretly pray that my worst fears 
 might never turn out to be too well founded, as now 
 thev have done.
 
 202 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 "Frank, vour uncle loves \ou, believe me, almost, if 
 not quite as much as his own children ; but he at that 
 time solemnly said, what he has since more than once 
 repeated, that he could rather endure to see you both 
 lying dead before him, than that a marriage between 
 you and Katie should ever take place. 
 
 " I may add that he did so far condescend to act upon 
 my suggestions, as to speak quietly and indirectly to 
 Katie herself upon the subject; and though of course 
 he could not even breathe a hint of the real true cause, 
 and took occasion to praise you personally very highly, 
 and to say how pleased he was to see you and herself 
 so much enjoying each other's society, yet that there 
 were strong family reasons — I rather think he gave 
 her to understand that some old family feud, or some- 
 thing of that sort, existed — why a marriage between 
 you could never even be dreamt of for an instant. 
 Though having chosen his opportunity of thus 
 speaking to her — as if casually — he at the same time 
 sufficiently showed that he was strongly in earnest ; 
 for Katie replied, half laughingly, half seriously, that he 
 might assure himself there was not the slightest 
 chance of either of you ever thinking even of any- 
 thing of the kind ; for that you were both much too 
 happy together as first cousins, or even brother and 
 sister, to think of any such nonsense, as she called
 
 WOE TO THE HOUSE OF BE LORME! 203 
 
 it. Then he looked across at me, I remember, as 
 much as to say how right he was, and how much 
 cleverer in his management — just like a true ' lord 
 of the creation,' as you men like to consider your- 
 selves." 
 
 " But, my dear aunt," I said, " even with the full 
 knowledge of this great secret into which you have now 
 let me, if it is, as you have implied, not out of the ques- 
 tion that Kate is some day or other to marry, why 
 should not I, who I am sure love her as much — ay, 
 far more intensely than any other man in the world 
 ever could do, not he allowed to take that risk as well 
 myself? If I do it with my eyes open, willing and 
 rejoicing as I should to do so, and with the consent of 
 my own parents, who " 
 
 " You !" quite screamed my aunt — " is it likely ? 
 Is it possible, I ask you, that they would consent to 
 anything so dreadful, so certainly horrible ? — or even 
 if they could be by any infatuation induced to such a 
 step, can you think that we — consider, my poor dear 
 boy — or is it possible that you are not yourself 
 aware " 
 
 At that very minute she was interrupted in what 
 she was going on to say by a loud cry of grief, so 
 sudden, such a thrilling wail from the sick room, that 
 we were rushing towards the door just as Harrison
 
 204 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 came bursting out, and, staggering towards my aunt, 
 fell sobbing with lier face in her lap. 
 
 " Oh, madam ! madam !" she shrieked, " it is dead 
 she is. She is taken ; the darling angel is taken 
 from us V and she filled the whole house with her 
 violent sobs and cries. 
 
 Unbidden, I ventured to follow my aunt into the 
 inner room, and there lay back upon her pillow the 
 lifeless form of the poor girl, white as the purest 
 marble, but so lovely — I really think she seemed more 
 lovely in my eyes than ever — though there could be 
 no doubt that life was gone. She looked more as if 
 she had fallen back into a deep sound sleep — her eyes 
 were closed, and her lips just wide enough apart to 
 show where her pure spirit had escaped, in one very 
 deep-drawn sigh — as her nurse, who had been sitting 
 by her side, described — till then having been 
 breathing placidly and regularly, only disturbed by 
 occasional mumbling, or a sort of low moaning in her 
 sleep ; but with that deep sigh the breathing had sud- 
 denly and altogether ceased. 
 
 The last expression left upon her face was indescri- 
 bably beautiful, and yet I could not help fancying, as 
 I stood by her, gazing intently upon those features, 
 which as I then felt I should never see again, that 
 they betrayed a something of defiance, or of earnest
 
 WOE TO THE HOUSE OF BE LORMEt 205 
 
 appeal, such as they wore that last evening we were 
 out together, when she was trying to stop me from 
 littering those burning words which, Heaven forgive 
 me ! would come out. 
 
 I could now more easily understand her scruples and 
 reasons, which at the time I thought so strange. 
 
 Though from the first moment we had passed into 
 the room we had no doubt or hope left, yet until the 
 medical men, summoned in all haste, as of course they 
 had been, had shaken their heads, and announced the 
 fatal truth, we, at least I know I had, felt that there 
 was yet something to cling to. 
 
 "While they seemed to seek for any sign of pulsa- 
 tion, or anxiously to listen at the parted lips for the 
 faintest indication of a breath, we ourselves remained 
 almost as motionless and breathless as the poor 
 darling child herself, in our suspense as to the result ; 
 and knowing too well all the while what the truth 
 must be, still refused credit to our own senses. 
 
 The surface of the small hand-glass which had 
 been held to her mouth, more, as I could see, to satisfy 
 and convince her parents than the Doctors them- 
 selves, remained undimmed, and confirmed only too 
 truly that she was gone, — taken from us for ever. 
 
 But 1 need not, cannot, even now, attempt to 
 describe further that melancholy scene. I was roused
 
 206 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 from my own intense agony of grief, in -which, having 
 fallen upon my knees at the bed-side, I was sobbing 
 like a three-year old — that is, of course, I mean, my 
 dear fellow, like a young child, not a horse; I was 
 roused, I was going to say, by being very sternly re- 
 quested to retire by the Colonel. Even in my 
 wretchedness I think that I felt amazed at the peremp- 
 tory tone and manner in which, as if himself intent 
 upon struggling against, and choking down his own 
 sorrow by extra harshness towards myself, he spoke, 
 and actually repulsed the hand which I had almost 
 unconsciously held out to him. 
 
 "Go !" he said, "pray go — at least at present," and 
 his voice sunk into a hard unnatural whisper. " You 
 had better go, sir; and pray do not come here again:'* 
 — and then, as if correcting himself, added, " until 
 your aunt or I feel equal to sending to let you know 
 that we again wish to receive you."
 
 207 
 
 CHAPTER XIX. 
 
 RUMPLE STILSKINS' SERVICES ARE REQUIRED. 
 
 How I found my way home that evening to my 
 lodgings I can now hardly tell you. I have a vague 
 recollection that upon reaching the open air I felt 
 myself reeling ahout as if I were drunk ; staggering 
 down the door steps and along the street, clutching hy 
 the houses and walls as I went ; the whole place was 
 whirling round me ; until I believe I took refuge, but 
 I cannot at all say for how long, in the recess of an open 
 doorway, and there stayed until found and assisted 
 home by one of those public chairmen in bright yellow 
 liveries who frequent the streets and public places of 
 Dresden as the sworn-in porters and commissionnaires 
 of the city. 
 
 As it happened, the fellow having been frequently 
 employed by me on divers errands and odd jobs, knew 
 me well personally. We used to call him Rumjole 
 Stilskins ; I don't know why exactly, except I rather 
 think it means bandy-legs in his own crackjaw lingo,
 
 208 . MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 and comes out of some well known fairy tale or 
 other. 
 
 Any how, he was a long-armed, crooked-kneed in- 
 dividual, who having somehow picked up a few broken 
 words and sentences of our language, was exceedingly 
 proud of his accomplishment; and had I believe in 
 consequence been specially told off by the police 
 authorities to take care of and, if he could, keep out 
 of mischief any drunken Englishmen whom he might 
 meet about, or hear of as needing his assistance in 
 returning to tlieir respective hotels or lodgings, or 
 anyhow likely to get themselves into any trouble with 
 the appointed custodians of public morals and order, 
 which by this timely prevention might be avoided. 
 
 Of course the honest Stilskins, by which abbre- 
 viation he was more generally recognised, at least by his 
 English patrons, did not for a moment doubt that I 
 was in what he, I fancy, considered to be the normal 
 and natural condition of my countrymen, and pro- 
 ceeded with every possible care and tenderness to 
 convoy me to my own quarters ; and having seen me 
 safely deposited, expressing by the way some amaze- 
 ment, not to say admiration at my having sense enough 
 under the circumstances as he viewed them to be able 
 to unlock my own door, he took a most respectful 
 leave of me, expressing his kind intention of calling
 
 RUMPLE STILSKINS' SERVICES ARE REQUIRED. 209 
 
 early in the morning to inquire after my health, as 
 well as to receive the small "Trinkgelt" over and above 
 the pay for his special service to which, as he assured 
 me, he was according to a regular official tariff justh 
 entitled. Left to myself, stretched full length upon 
 my bed just as I had tumbled on to it when I came 
 in, there I lay overwhelmed, positively stunned, as if 
 by a regular crack from some fellow's fist on my head, 
 — not asleep, but in a kind of stupor without recogni- 
 sable thought or feeling. 
 
 How long 1 thus remained I can scarcely tell, but 
 it must have been for some hours, as, though neither 
 shutters nor curtains had been closed, the room was 
 in thick darkness, when I was partially roused by a 
 tremendous row at the outer door of the house, a 
 hammering and thumping which continued louder and 
 louder, interspersed with very short and perceptibly 
 decreasing intervals or pauses, as if whoever it might 
 be was listening for some answer, or signs of recogni- 
 tion from within, and then after each short pause 
 bang, bang, bang came the blows again with a heartier 
 will than before. 
 
 1 think it was just beginning to dawn upon my 
 mind that there might perhaps be somebody wanting 
 to come in, when I heard the patter of loosely- 
 shod footsteps descending the stairs, the outer-door 
 
 VOL. I. p
 
 210 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 opened, and there rose a loud altercation between my 
 landlady — as I could tell by her shrill tones — and 
 some man — as far as I could make out by the depth 
 of the voice, though I did not recognise it at first as 
 one which I ought to know. 
 
 I soon began to think that I heard my own name 
 several times repeated, and, with that clue, could 
 pretty well make out that whoever it might be, was 
 eagerly inquiring after and desiring instantly to see 
 me. 
 
 "My knowledge of German by that time, though 
 still limited, was enough to serve me in all my com- 
 mon wants of life, inquiries, and such like ; and it is 
 wonderful how sharp one's ears and intellects become 
 if you find out that you yourself are the subject 
 under discussion. 
 
 Now, as it so chanced, none of the people of the house 
 had happened to have seen me come home — the door of 
 my private room being the first close upon the top of the 
 stairs. My old landlady, who was a queer tempered 
 female when fairly roused, was not therefore perhaps 
 on the whole so much to blame in asserting, and per- 
 tinaciously sticking to her assertion, as she did (not 
 without many extra shrill yells and adjurations upon 
 the irregular ways and habits of all English lodgers in 
 general, and of myself, that night at least in particular);
 
 RUMPLE STILSKINS' SERVICES ARE REQUIRED. 211 
 
 that Herr von Lambard had not come home ; that his 
 door "was locked up ; and that moreover he had, as he 
 always would do, carried off the key with him, instead 
 of leaving it in her charge, as, according to her pri- 
 vate views and regulations, it ought to have been left. 
 In confirmation of her statement, I heard her call 
 special attention to the lamp at the foot of the 
 stairs, and my particular taper still waiting my return 
 beside it. 
 
 Though now tolerably aroused, and perfectly 
 taking in the fact that it was no other individual 
 than myself who was thus inquired after, I still 
 felt a strange indifference on the subject, and dis- 
 inclination to stir or show any signs of life. I have a 
 sort of idea that if I felt at all concerned in the 
 matter, it was with a vague feeling of curiosity and 
 wonder, as to where Frank Lambai'd really could be, 
 and whether they would find him anywhere else — as I 
 heard the inquiry continued whether he was likely to 
 have gone to any party, or to be at the Ressource, as 
 they call the club there, or whether bis friends in 
 Luttichau Strasse would be likely to know, or even 
 whether he might not possibly be still there, though 
 it was much later than he usually stayed. To that 
 last suggestion I distinctly remember giving mentally 
 a decided support, as not at all unlikely, or at any 
 
 p "Z
 
 212 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 rate thinking that it might he well worth going so far 
 to see ; and I sat up upon my bed half-inclined to 
 holloa out, and offer to go myself, as knowing the way 
 better, and being perhaps less likely to frighten or dis- 
 turb the De Lormes in case that I should not be still 
 there, than if a stranger should go knocking them up 
 witli inquiries which, at that time of night, might ap- 
 pear ill-timed and irregular. 
 
 I was still debating whether I had better or not do 
 so, when my landlady, as I suppose only too happy to 
 jump at that, or any other conclusion likely to rid her 
 of her troublesome disturber, and allow her to retire 
 again to the depths of her own virtuous feather-bed, 
 seemed much to favour that idea ; for she immediately 
 took upon herself to state that no doubt Liittichau 
 Strasse was where I should be found ; and shutting to 
 the door with a slam, I could hear her clump up the 
 stairs, grumbling at every step at all Englanders, as 
 more troublesome and incomprehensible than any 
 other nation, Christian or pagan, under the sun. 
 
 It could barely have been a quarter of an hour or 
 twenty minutes later, when yielding again to the 
 feeling of lethargy, heavier and different somehow 
 from natural drowsiness — having only just roused 
 myself sufficiently to throw off my coat and neckcloth, 
 and then lying down as before on the outside, or rather
 
 RUMPLE STILSKINS" SERVICES ARE REQUIRED. 213 
 
 on the top of tlie upper feather-bed which they give 
 yon in that country by way of a covering, — without 
 further undressing, I had fallen off into a kind of doze, 
 Avhen I was once more startled by the row at the door 
 beginning again ; whoever it was, pounding as if they 
 were going to break it in, and then came a clatter of 
 small stones or gravel against my window, and a loud 
 voice — the same voice, I could recognise, as before, 
 only this time in plain English. 
 
 "Lambard! — I say, Frank Lambard, are you within 
 there ? — if so, I must see you this moment ! — Come 
 down directly, and let me speak to you — a most im- 
 portant matter — a matter of life and death, or I 
 wouldn't come at such an hour. I know you are in 
 there, for Stilskins, whom I met and have brought 
 back here with me, says so." 
 
 And then began again a thundering and rattling at 
 the street door, which made the old house echo again. 
 
 It was De Lyons' voice, and I was fairly roused, 
 and sufficiently myself by this time to think that some- 
 thing really must be the matter, so I groped about 
 for a match and struck a light. Again the indignant 
 landlady had gone down, and was again solemnly pro- 
 testing that I was still not yet returned. 
 
 Almost again apparently convinced, De Lyons 
 seemed to be leaving the door in despair, as I could
 
 214 MELGHIOR GORLES. 
 
 hear by his voice, when as I suppose stepping back 
 into the street, he looked up and saw the light I had 
 struck, in my window; and then of course, satisfied 
 that I really was tbere, he slipped by the irate old Mrs. 
 Slanngartz, who, putting her head out of the open 
 door, began to yell for the '^Polizei" with all her might 
 and main ; while he having tumbled over and extin- 
 guished the afure-mentioned lamp in his violent haste, 
 was kicking at the panels of my door, and shouting for 
 me to let him in, as if the house was on fire, which I 
 really began to think must be the case. 
 
 "For heaven's sake, my dear fellow," he cried, burst- 
 ing in in a state of the most panting excitement as 
 soon as I had unbolted the door, "jump up at once! 
 You have not a moment to lose. Here, dip your head 
 into this tub of cold water; or twist a wet towel round 
 your temples : — that is right ; dip it again ; let me pour 
 some down the back of your neck, that will set you 
 right in a moment — get your things on — what, you are 
 dressed ? Oh, to be sure ; Stilskins,\ihom I luckily met 
 as I was cutting along to Liittichau Strasse, told me 
 how he had brought you home : and that made me 
 come back again, certain that you must be in, in spite 
 of that old she-dragon's confounded lies and pro- 
 testations.
 
 215 
 
 CHAPTER XX. 
 
 FRANK LAMBARD TO THE RESCUE. 
 
 We were soon out in the dark street, and De Lyons 
 was lugging me along with all his might by the arm. 
 
 " Now then, old fellow, hold up ; gather your senses 
 together — you are all right, ain't you ? So, now let us 
 be off, and not lose a minute in getting down to their 
 house. I told you that I would prevent it if I could, 
 hut I was afraid I might he sold after all ; hut now the 
 Professor has told me how to go to work, and I knew 
 old Zauber would do anything in the world for me ; 
 and so I hope we have saved her, and shall beat the 
 little rascal with his own weapons yet. Though it is 
 a matter of life and death, I tell you ; for if decay, how- 
 ever slight, once began, we should be too late." 
 
 " Where are we to go to? what are you talking 
 about?" I said. I began to think, raving as he was, 
 almost incoherent in his excitement, that De Lyons 
 was really drunk. 
 
 " Where to ? To Liittichau Strasse, of course — to
 
 216 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 your friends — your relations you told me tliey were. 
 Have you heard whetlier anything has happened to 
 that jolly pretty girl — young lady — your cousin, you 
 know ?" 
 
 Then the whole truth, and all that had occurred 
 that afternoon, which seemed to me like months ago, 
 suddenly rushed back to my mind. It was till then 
 as if it had gone completely and entirely out of my 
 head ; the memory of it all came back like a fresh and 
 crushing blow upon my mind. 
 
 "Liittichau Strasse!" I said, resisting him; " I can't. 
 We must not go there — we must not, indeed. Have 
 you not heard what has happened ? — there is death in 
 the house there. Katie, my cousin, the beautiful girl 
 you speak of, is dead : she died this evening." 
 
 " What time ?" he inquired, " what time was it ? 
 Collect yourself; try to think, my dear fellow, if you 
 can remember the exact time. Was it six or seven, or 
 after seven ? Try to think ; for it is really important." 
 
 I knew it was after seven, I said, in a sort of 
 dreamy way ; but in spite of my confusion, could not 
 help thinking that, even though he did not know her, 
 it was strange that he should not be more surprised 
 or shocked, but ask such minute particulars as to 
 details. 
 
 " It was striking seven, I know, as I went upstairs
 
 FRANK LAMBARD TO THE RESCUE. 217 
 
 to see my aunt; and I suppose it must have been 
 almost half-past when we heard the nurse cry out that 
 she was dead." 
 
 " Half-past seven, you say ? and it is now just one ; 
 then we are in time yet to save her, if you will only do 
 as I tell you, and firmly believe in the success of what 
 you are going about, without any doubts or hesitation. 
 Do you hear me ?" 
 
 I could hear what he said ; but felt the sensation 
 of drowsiness again coming over me so strongly that if 
 De Lyons had not caught hold of me in his arms, and 
 supported me with his whole strength, I felt that I 
 must have sunk down then and there — I could not 
 have moved another step. 
 
 Very luckily we were close by a great fountain, or 
 rather cistern of water there is at the corner of one of the 
 avenues — allees they call them — into which my friend 
 dipped his handkerchief, and most liberally besprinkled 
 or, I might say, deluged my face, chest, and hands, till 
 I was wringing wet all over ; and then fixing me upon 
 one of the benches with my back uj) against a tree, 
 began a series of manoeuvres which, that being the first 
 time I had ever seen anything of the sort, stupid and 
 bewildered as I still felt, I think had as much the 
 efi'ect of concentrating my attention and so tending to 
 recover the proper action of my mind, as from any
 
 218 MELCHIOR OORLES. 
 
 particularly magnetic or physical powers in his manipu- 
 lations. Anyhow, he set to work, making upward 
 passes with his hands, not as I have since seen mes- 
 merists do when they are putting a patient off to sleep, 
 but just t'other way up, exactly the reverse, beginning 
 quite low down almost at my toes, then up my legs and 
 knees, and so gradually passing up my whole body to 
 my face, and the top of my head. 
 
 His queer dodges certainly had the effect of making 
 me feel better and more myself, though heartily un- 
 comfortable, for I was seized with a violent fit of 
 shivering ; though that, perhaps, might have been 
 caused (by the way) by the two duckings I had 
 undergone. 
 
 All of a sudden a fresh thought seemed forcibly to 
 have struck De Lyons in the midst of his operations. 
 
 "By gum !" he exclaimed, speaking to himself, "I 
 should not be surprised if it were so ! I can but try it on, 
 at least. Here, Lambard, old fellow, pick up a bit, man, 
 and tell me whether this article came from or has ever 
 belonged to you ?" 
 
 He dived into his pocket and lugged out an old kid 
 glove all shrivelled up and dirty, which he thrust into 
 my unresisting hand. 
 
 The immediate effect was marvellous, perfectly in- 
 credible.
 
 FRANK LAMBARD TO THE RESCUE. 219 
 
 No sooner had I clutched that glove than in that 
 instant I was completely myself again, broad awake, 
 and ready to act as ever I felt in my life. 
 
 "Hurrah I right, by jingo !" ?>di\di Taraxacum. "Of 
 course it was," still talking to himself more than to 
 me : " what a fool I was not to think of it at once, and 
 how lucky that I grabbed it with the other ramshackle 
 as I did ; very odd it did not occur to me before, when 
 I saw the state you were in, but I suppose that sinner 
 Rumple Stiiskins's jabber put me off the right scent. 
 But now, Frank Lambard, you really are all right and 
 your own proper self again ;" and he gave me a rough 
 shake by way of settling that point, or perhaps of con- 
 vincing himself satisfactorily ; " listen to me atten- 
 tively, and, as I have already told you, if you will 
 follow my directions, though you have no time to spare, 
 you may yet save your cousin, even though she may 
 have seemed to you dead and gone. By looking sharp 
 and acting like yourself with full pluck, you may still 
 bring her back to herself and her parents. 
 
 " Don't stop to ask questions, because every mo- 
 ment is precious. I will give you any explanations you 
 like afterwards — to-morrow will do well enough for 
 that — if you like ; but now make haste ; let us get 
 to the house, and you must find your way in, by fair 
 means, if vou can, but if not, bv force even, if we are
 
 220 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 put to it ; but at any rate before another half-hour is 
 over our heads, you must go in straight on end to 
 where the young lady is lying in a trance, for it is no 
 more, and on the truth of that fact I will lay my life 
 itself. I speak as knowing what I am about, you see, 
 and not on mere guess or conjecture. I have every 
 reason for knowing that what I tell you is nothing 
 but fact: you must insist upon being admitted to the 
 very room where your cousin is lying, as you and her 
 relations, I have no doubt, suppose dead, and lost to 
 you all for ever. Stick to your point, mind — take no 
 refusal; and then having gained admission, place this 
 that I now give you in her hand if you can, but any- 
 where actually touching her will do. Do it, or at 
 least see it done yourself, trust no one else, and to 
 the best of your power try yourself to believe with all 
 your might in the happy fulfilment of your purpose 
 while doing as I tell you. 
 
 "I suppose you are aware, that by the police regula- 
 tions of this country, she will have to be removed from 
 the house the very first thing in the morning, and within 
 twenty-four hours of her supposed death must be 
 buried ? — That is why there is no time to be lost ; it 
 might be too late. This, I tell you, brought into her 
 presence, and put actually in or on her hand, may, 
 and I firmly believe will, save her."
 
 FRANK LAMBARD TO THE RESCUE. 221 
 
 He held out to me a gold locket, which at the first 
 glance I could see had undergone some rough usage ; 
 the cover of it seemed to have been wrenched back, 
 and the glass inside was broken right across. 
 Together with the locket, though now detached from 
 it, he also handed me a long dark glossy lock of hair, 
 which smelt of burning, as if it had been singed or 
 perhaps acted upon by some strong chemical. 
 
 "I could not get hold of these articles by fair means," 
 De Lyons explained, as he saw me looking up from 
 them to himself with amazement. " I had no chance of 
 doing so but by main force, and had, as you may see, 
 a hardish tussle for them with the little rascal. 
 
 " But never mind all that now ! — only don't lose one 
 moment more than you can help in doing all I have 
 told you ;" and he began bustling me along again.
 
 222 MELCEIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER XXI. 
 
 THE REVIVAL. 
 
 We had arrived in the very street, and in front of my 
 uncle's house, before I had at all realized my situa- 
 tion or my strange errand, or indeed made up my 
 mind how to attempt even to gain admittance at such 
 an unwarrantable hour, more particularly under the 
 sad existing circumstances. 
 
 A very feeble light showed a glimmer through a 
 partly open shutter. It was in the very room in which, 
 as I in an instant recognised, with a cold feeling of 
 pain, which seemed to freeze up my very brain within 
 my skull, all that remained of the poor darling girl 
 was lying; and I felt sure that by that feeble light 
 Harrison probably, or one of the female servants, must 
 be sitting up watching. 
 
 All the rest of the house was shut up entirely, and 
 seemed, perhaps from the contrast of that single light, 
 all the more profoundly wrapped in profound quiet and 
 stillness. 
 
 1 at first hoped and endeavoured to attract the atten-
 
 THE REVIVAL. 223 
 
 tion of whoever it might be who was watching within 
 that awful room, by calling the name of Harrison three 
 or four times, but at the same time knowing how 
 nervous and liable to terror she would most likely be, 
 I was afraid to raise my voice much above a loud 
 whisper. 
 
 " Oh, this wont do at all !" cried De Lyons, losing 
 all patience ; " confound it, man ! can't you under- 
 stand or believe what I tell you, that it is a matter 
 of life and death ?" and again working himself up 
 into a state of excitement, he seized hold of the 
 bell handle, and began to tug at it with all his might 
 and main, and then to rattle and kick at the street 
 door, as he had before done at my own, when deter- 
 mined to rouse me. 
 
 " Never mind the consequences ! This is no time for 
 mincing matters or humbugging about ceremony. I 
 tell you that we, or rather you, must make them let you 
 in, Lambard, or you will be too late — too late to save 
 her from a horrible death, or even the more horrible 
 fate of living without a soul. Such things have hap- 
 pened before now ; so here goes again, till I make the 
 whole street hear us.' 
 
 " Wer ist ?" cried a woman's voice from the window, 
 which was opened a little way. 
 
 Perfectly aghast as I was at my companion's reck-
 
 224 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 less assault upon the door, and judging, as I well 
 could, of what must be its effects, and the feeling of 
 those within, sorrow-stricken, and weighed down with 
 grief as they of course were, my first impulse was to 
 rush away anywhere to hide myself out of sight for 
 ever, rather than be discovered as participating in 
 what I felt conscious must appear such an outrage 
 upon all common decency, or even humanity. I think 
 I must have yielded to that impulse, only that I felt 
 afraid of being recognised in the light of one of the few 
 and far between street lamps which happened to be 
 almost directly opposite the door. 
 
 I instinctively shrunk myself up into the recess of 
 the entrance, where I could not be seen from the win- 
 dows above. 
 
 " Wer ist?" again asked the person at the window, 
 and then another voice added an earnest entreaty (of 
 course in German) that, whoever we might be, we would 
 kindly depart quietly and not disturb the house of 
 mourning, " for we are visited at this moment with a 
 most grievous affliction, and death is now in this house, 
 in this very chamber," it added, bursting into a violent 
 sob. " Whoever you are, as Christians we entreat you 
 to desist and leave us undisturbed in our deep grief to 
 mourn in quiet over the loss of our poor child, who 
 has this night been taken from us."
 
 TEE REVIVAL. 225 
 
 It was my poor aunt herself. I knew the tones of her 
 sad voice, and I stepped out of my hiding-place in 
 the door-way into the street. 
 
 "Mrs. De Lorme, it is only me," I cried. "My 
 
 dearest aunt, do not be frightened, but for heaven's 
 
 sake come or send down to the front door, and let me 
 
 come in. I must come in this very instant — it is a 
 
 matter of life and death ; and though it was not me 
 
 kicking up that tremendous noise with the bell, or 
 
 knocking at the door in that awful way, yet come in 
 I must, I tell you ; and if you will believe in me, and 
 
 only trust me, I can and will save dearest Katie, and 
 
 restore her alive to you yet." 
 
 I then was standing out right under the full lamp 
 light, such as it was, in order that she might see and 
 recognise me, and so not be alarmed, or think that 
 robbers or assassins were come to attack the house. 
 
 It had never occurred to me that I was all this time 
 wearing the soaked towel bound tight round my 
 temples, just as Taraxacum had tied it, to bring me 
 to my proper senses ; and thus arrayed had come out 
 of my lodgings without a hat, or any other covering to 
 my head : my coat was flung loosely over my shoulders 
 with the sleeves tied round my neck, instead of my 
 absent neckcloth ; and what with my several immer- 
 sions, first in the tub and subsequently in the fountain- 
 
 voi.. I. Q
 
 223 MELCniOR GORLES. 
 
 place, it is no great wonder that I presented a some- 
 what dilapidated, not to say ghastly appearance. 
 
 " You must indeed let me come in," I again voci- 
 ferated. " For Heaven's sake, let me in before it is too 
 late, and while there is time to save her, as indeed I 
 can if you will only let me. Don't you know me ? 
 Dear aunt, it is me, Frank Lamhard, your nephew." 
 
 "Lor, tip me topsy-turvy!" exclaimed Mrs. Harrison, 
 somewhat profanely (but she was always a privileged 
 character in the establishment, and rather given to the 
 use of strange modes of expression), as she shoved her 
 head violently out over my aunt's shoulder — " If it 
 isn't your very own nevy, ma'am, that ere Mr. Lambard 
 hisself ! in company, too, with one of them rumbustical 
 studeutses, and botli of 'em, s' help me seraphims, 
 seeming to ray senses h'as tipsey h'as h'owls !" 
 
 "Harrison I" I cried, "come down cjirectly and let 
 me in I Do you hear me ? I say, for Heaven's sake, 
 come down and open the door to me !" 
 
 She drew her head in again without vouchsafing 
 me any sort of answer to my most earnest appeal ; but 
 as she did so, I could hear her say to my aunt, " Now, 
 ma'am, had I best go for to rouser up the Colonel, 
 ma'am, or do you seem to think we had better both 
 skreak out for the police ?" 
 I was becoming desperate, but once again I appealed
 
 THE REVIVAL. 227 
 
 to them ; and that they might understand me, I spoke 
 with a forced distinctness and precision : " Harrison, 
 confound your stupid tongue ! Aunt, indeed, I am 
 perfectly master of myself, and all right, but I do, and 
 must insist upon coming in ; and if you are not going 
 to allow me to do so by the proper way immediately 
 and quietly, I must do my best to gain an entrance as 
 I can ; but to come in somehow I am quite deter- 
 mined." 
 
 The window from which this parley was taking 
 place was no height from the ground level, and as I, 
 i nmy anxiety, mounted up upon the top door-step, I 
 saw that it would require no very great effort of 
 activity to have caught hold of the window-sill in a 
 spring from where I was standing, and to have clam- 
 bered in. 
 
 It did cross my mind to make the attempt, and 
 80 carry the fortress fairly by assault ; but unless ab- 
 solutely driven to that resource by a direct refusal of 
 admittance, I should have been sorry to have dese- 
 crated that awful chamber where poor Katie's remains 
 were resting, by what I felt must, at any rate at the 
 time, have appeared a most unbecoming, not to say 
 disgraceful act of violence, against two women, whom 
 
 probably it would have frightened out of their very 
 wits. 
 
 q2
 
 228 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 I went so far as to threaten it, however, and I heard 
 a fierce parley going on inside between the mistress 
 and maid, both talking hard at once, and I rather 
 fancy, under the erroneous impression that it was in a 
 wdiisper. 
 
 Whilst again almost considering whether I should 
 not, as time grew short, be driven to extremes, I found 
 that the two had come down together to the other 
 side of the street-door, for I could hear them still 
 cackling through the key-hole ; presently the lock 
 turned, the chain inside clanked, and the door, though 
 I was expecting it to do so, opened so suddenly that 
 I was inside, and it was sharply shut to again before 
 I knew where I was. It was pitch dark, they had not 
 brought a light down with them, and before I had re- 
 covered my surprise I felt myself violently seized 
 hold upon on each side ; my aunt on one arm, and 
 her abigail on the other, hanging on like grim death 
 with their whole weight upon me; and dash me I if I 
 didn't feel that wretch Harrison, for though I could 
 not see, I knew which was her by the extra tenacity of 
 her claws which were digging into the muscle of my 
 arm through my shirt-sleeve. Dash me, I say, if she 
 wasn't fumbling with her garter, or stay-lace it may 
 have been, trying her very best to tie my hands behind 
 ray back.
 
 TEE REVIVAL. 229 
 
 " There now, Franky, dearest," said my aunt in a 
 soft soothing, coaxing sort of voice, as if she were 
 speaking to a child ; " 1 am sure you wouldn't wish to 
 wake your poor uncle, would you, dear ? who has only 
 just got off at last into his first sleep; and surely, 
 Franky, you cannot have forgotten all that we 
 have been through this dreadful, dreadful day ? 
 Then he shall come, the dear boy, with his own 
 aunt who loves him and will take care of him. He 
 shall have the spare room, and go to bed there till 
 the morning, and have a good night's rest, and stay 
 with us quietly till he is better, and quite recovered, 
 and perhaps in time we may all hope to get through 
 our dreadful loss, our bitter, bitter sorrow for that 
 poor darling child, lying dead upstairs." 
 
 " She is not lying dead, " I said very earnestly, 
 " she is nothing of the sort, I will convince you. I 
 do assure you, aunt, if you will only let me go up to 
 the room quietly — come up with me yourself — she 
 shall wake up from the trance in which she has been 
 laid, for that is what she is in, and can and shall be 
 restored to you ; I wish I could make you believe me, 
 when I tell you that I have been through nearly the 
 same myself, though it had less efFectupon me — I have, 
 indeed, my dear aunt — since I parted with you this 
 very evening. ,
 
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 232 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 been placed upon the table by the bedside ; taking out 
 the flowers, I dashed the water all over her face and 
 neck. 
 
 At that very moment I felt myself violently seized 
 and pinioned from behind. It was the Colonel who, 
 as soon as he heard who it was, had hurried up after 
 me, and now was holding me in the gripe of a 
 lion. 
 
 " Pray, oh, pray be very gentle with him, dearest 
 George. Command yourself, and only be gentle !" I 
 heard my aunt cry, who had bustled up after her 
 husband, to the door. Pray don't hurt him, poor 
 fellow ! You know it is not his fault. For your 
 poor child's sake, and memory, be very gentle with 
 him." 
 
 I did not attempt to resist. I had carried through 
 my intention, and done what I wanted, so did not care 
 any longer to struggle, even if it would have been any 
 use, holding me at an advantage as the old soldier was, 
 with all his force. 
 
 He had turned me round and was walking me quite 
 unresistingly to the door; we were just leaving the 
 room, actually in the very doorway, when, by Heaven! 
 we all turned round with a start. 
 
 A sudden start, indeed, and not without reason for 
 it too.
 
 THE REVIVAL. 233 
 
 It was dear Katie's voice, very gentle, and as if not 
 half awake — 
 
 " Harrison," she called lowly, though quite dis- 
 tinctly, "Harrison — mamma dear, are you there too ? 
 Oh, I am so glad that I am here, so glad to have come 
 back again to you ! I thought I should never, never 
 have been allowed to see any of you again ! " 
 
 I felt my heart give such a bound within me, it 
 seemed like the snap of some spring. I only wonder 
 now that it did not kill me on the spot. 
 
 The Colonel stood for an instant also, as if para- 
 lyzed, then dropped his hold of my arms, and in 
 another instant was on his knees by his daughter's 
 bedside. 
 
 As to old Harrison, before I knew what she was at, 
 she had wound her skinny old arms round my neck 
 from behind, in a hug nearly as tight as the Colonel's 
 had been, and set to to kiss and slobber all down my 
 cheeks and neck, so that, if I could have only got round 
 at her, I should like to have tweaked her stupid old 
 nose for her ; as it was, I had to kick up pretty sharply 
 behind, before I could get her off. 
 
 Well, explain it as you like, or think you can, it 
 is all positive fact that I liave been telling you, im- 
 possible or incredible as you may think it or not. As 
 long as I live it is not very likely that I shall ever
 
 234 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 forget that extraordinary scene, though of course there 
 are particulars which I may not now have told you 
 quite exactly. 
 
 I went down to the front door and there found 
 Taraxacum, who had faithfully been waiting all the 
 time. When I told him tlie result and fulfilment of 
 his prognostications — instantly nailing me on the 
 spot for the promise of an introduction the very first 
 opportunity, which, under the peculiar circumstances, 
 I do not exactly see how I could have refus ed — 
 betook himself off to some favourite Keller or haunt, 
 alleging that it was too late by that time to be worth 
 going to bed ; and, as I heard afterwards, celebrated 
 his joy and self-contentment for having taken part in 
 so vei*y successful and praiseworthy an action, by 
 getting so awfully drunk that it required the whole 
 energies of Rumple Stilskins and no less than four 
 of his canary-coloured comrades to carry him home to 
 his own quarters, at some advanced hour of the 
 morning.
 
 236 
 
 CHAPTER XXII. 
 
 NOTICE OF REMOVAL. 
 
 You may well understand that after all I had gone 
 through mentally, as well as physically, my desperate 
 tussle with, and then the hugging I had undergone 
 from Harrison, by no means to be considered as the 
 least of my trials — when I did get back to my own 
 lodgings, I was in no particular humour for either 
 explanations or recriminations with old Mother 
 Slanngiirtz, my landlady, whom, notwithstanding her 
 nocturnal disturbances, I found up, and evidently 
 Iving in wait for me. 
 
 It was by the time I turned into my own street, 
 broad daylight, a fresh and beautiful summer morn- 
 ing. There was no avoiding her, for there she stood 
 exactly in the centre of the open doorway. 
 
 To my courteous salutation of " Guten Morgen, 
 Fran Slanngiirtz," she only vouchsafed a sort of husky 
 grunt by way of response, and followed up what might 
 be considered as the opening gun of a battery, with a
 
 236 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 volley of musketry in the shape of invectives and re- 
 proaches, interspersed with occasional flights of rockets 
 or shells, as far as I could judge of them by the tone 
 of voice in which they were launched at me, in the 
 form of sarcasms so stunning, that they seemed almost 
 to take her own breath away. 
 
 Not only did the old dragon go in at me personally 
 on the score of inebriety, irregularity of hours, and 
 morality, or rather every sort of immorality which 
 could be laid to any individual's charge, but also upon 
 the iniquities of my friends in particular, and even my 
 compatriots in general, for whom I felt it utterly use- 
 less even to attempt to make her understand that I 
 could not pretend to hold myself responsible. 
 
 Fortunately it was of course entirely in her native 
 vernacular, and delivered as it was with an unparal- 
 leled volubility, much that I have no doubt was im- 
 pressive, if not valuable, as reflection and advice, was 
 lost upon my untutored ears. 
 
 So, watching my opportunity, and dodging beneath 
 her swinging arms, which, with the full force of na- 
 tural eloquence were marking the emphasis of her 
 discourse, I slipped into my own room, and, as we 
 used to call it at college, sported my door before she 
 could well turn upon me, so that the remainder of her 
 observations, even, if possible, increased in intensity.
 
 NOTICE OF REMOVAL. 237 
 
 were delivered through the keyhole at me, as I tum- 
 bled out of my clothes and into my bed, and in less 
 than two minutes was fast asleep ; though, for all I 
 know to the contrary, the old shrew may have been 
 jawing at me for another hour or more. 
 
 It was, I know, getting on into the afternoon be- 
 fore I awoke, refreshed and peckish enough, and I 
 was just giving myself a preliminary stretch and 
 roll over in my bed, before taking that important 
 step which one always — or I will speak for myself, at 
 least — hates so much, from my warm bed into my 
 cold slippers, when my eye was caught by a piece of 
 paper on the floor, which had evidently been thrust in 
 at the bottom of the door. 
 
 No less did it prove than a formally drawn up do- 
 cument, commencing with a closely written epitome 
 of the lecture I had undergone in the early morning, 
 and terminating with a notice to quit forthwith, and to 
 carry myself, and my goods and chattels elsewhere. 
 
 Trusting that the storm would blow over, I thought 
 the best way would be to ignore and take no notice 
 of the matter, so refolding it I just chucked it back 
 to the spot from which I had picked it up. 
 
 And later, when the deeply-injured and irascible 
 old lady brought me in my breakfast, and having 
 carefully picked up the cartel had laid it upon the
 
 238 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 tray before me ; I then, without pretending to be 
 aware of the action, thanked her, and tearing it across 
 proceeded to light my cigarette with it. 
 
 She snorted and her eyes distended. I thought she 
 was going to break out again, but she seemed taken 
 aback, and I had somehow got her out of my room 
 asrain before she could find utterance to her wrath. 
 Perhaps she had entirely exhausted her magazine of 
 ideas and indignant objurgations at her previous attack: 
 anyhow she was round, and outside, and the door 
 between us, without having again had time to open 
 fire, and I flattered myself that if she had proper 
 time to cool, we should go on again all right, and 
 that I should hear no more about it ; but there I 
 reckoned without mine host, or I should rather say 
 mine hostess ; but those Germans when they do get an 
 idea into their most obtuse heads, are a pig-headed 
 and very stiff-necked style of animal. 
 
 In the meantime, however, my predominant idea, 
 even I think before that of going down to Luttichau 
 Strasse to inquire after, or perhaps, as I dared to hope, 
 even see Katie, and under the strange concatenation 
 of circumstances, make out how matters were likely 
 to be going on there ; my first idea, I say, was to lose 
 no time in finding out that little arch-fiend Gorles,
 
 NOTICE OF REMOVAL. 239 
 
 and bringing him to a reckoning for his sins and 
 iniquities. 
 
 I had fully made up my mind, as soon as I had 
 caught him, to smash, crush, and utterly demolish 
 him, like any other venomous nauseous insect or 
 reptile, then and there. 
 
 I did not look for any explanation, or intend 
 entering into any argument with him. I felt that I 
 should probably be baffled, or that by some of his 
 tricks or jugglery he might escape me. I was con- 
 scious that I could bring no exactly definite proof or 
 evidence against him. I had formed no plan of how 
 I should begin, as to what I should say, or even do 
 exactly, when I should, as I was resolved, have got 
 hold of him, beyond his immediate annihilation. 
 
 I have since, upon looking back to my then feel- 
 ings and intentions, had good reason to consider it 
 just as well as not, that circumstances at the time 
 prevented the carrying out of my immediate views. 
 
 Yes, — it undoubtedly was, as luost things are 
 somehow, for the best, that I had not the slightest 
 idea where he lived, or where I should be likely to 
 find him. 
 
 Taraxacum, to whom I naturally looked for certain 
 information in that respect, was, when I called upon
 
 240 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 liim (as I think I have ah'eady incidentally mentioned) , 
 far too much overpowered by his joyous feelings, to 
 say nothing of the glorious celebration of the said 
 feelings, which did his heart, if not his head, so much 
 credit ; — the state he was in being, as he afterwards 
 explained, entirely on my account, and in the cause 
 of real sympathy and friendship ; but he was far too 
 heavily asleep to have the slightest chance of being 
 fit to come out with or in any way be of any use 
 to me. 
 
 Later I sent up a note by Rumiile Stilskins, who 
 had faithfully to his promise called early, and had 
 been hanging about the door the whole morning till I 
 could admit him — it was from him I learnt the par- 
 ticulars about De Lyons. I had also inquired the 
 abode, or most usual haunts of Gorles, but he was, or 
 professed himself ignorant on the point ; though pro- 
 mising to lose no time in finding out for me. 
 
 On this special errand I despatched him, giving 
 him at the same time a note, which I meant by way 
 of an ice-breaker for Liittichau Strasse, announcing my 
 intention, with the sanction of the Colonel and my 
 aunt, to whom it was addressed, of looking in there 
 in the evening. 
 
 In less than twenty minutes the trusty Stilskins 
 was back again, bringing my own undelivered note in
 
 NOTICE OF REMOVAL. 241 
 
 his hand, and with the astounding information that 
 the De Lormes, with their whole family and estahlish- 
 ment, were gone, and that the house, or at least the 
 part of it which they had occupied, was all closed 
 and empty. 
 
 VOL. I. E
 
 242 . MELCUIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER XXIII. 
 TO let: a riRST floor in luttichau strasse. 
 
 Quite unable to believe the fellow's story, I hurried 
 off immediately to Liittichau Strasse to satisfy myself 
 of a fact -which, though my fears foreboded only to be 
 too true, my senses almost refused to take in. 
 
 There was no doubt about it. The house was all 
 shut up and empty, sure enough. 
 
 I pealed at the door bell, I shouted for the woman 
 of the house. 
 
 I could only learn from her, when she at last conde- 
 scended to make her appearance with her mouth full, 
 wiping crumbs and relics of the repast from which she 
 had been interrupted, with the back of her great greasy 
 hand, before she could find breath, or I suppose it 
 might be space inside to reply, which she did after 
 sundry leisurely puffs, that she could only suppose that 
 the Herr Oberste (which being translated means 
 Colonel), and his gncidige Frau, must have that 
 morning received some sudden and most imperative
 
 TO LET: A FIRST FLOOR IN LUTTICHAU STRASSE. 243 
 
 news from England which could thus have caused 
 them to depart at a moment's notice. 
 
 That at only eight o'clock that morning had she,aad 
 they at the same time themselves apparently, had an 
 idea of their departure, that all then had been in a 
 state of confusion and hurry, everything packed up, 
 their passports procured by special favour from the 
 Minister with whom they were intimate; their accounts 
 settled; her own among them, with three months' rent 
 over and above what was owing, (she could not help 
 showing her own intense appreciation of that part of 
 the arrangements) ; and all had departed — all, the dead 
 young fraulein, and all — by the two o'clock train from 
 the Newstadt station. 
 
 " The dead young fraulein and all," she repeated; as I 
 suppose, staggered as I already was, T had not exhi- 
 bited a sufficient increase of astonishment at that last 
 announcement ; that the beautiful fraulein had died 
 last night ; that she herself had been into the room to 
 see her, and indeed had herself assisted the nurse at 
 the last aiTangements of the body, and had then gone 
 out, by the express desire of the Colonel, to give the 
 requisite notification to the police authorities ; and 
 also, that while she was about it, though the Colonel, 
 perhaps not aware of the customs of her country, or 
 very likely forgetful from his heavy griefs, had not 
 
 k2
 
 244 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 desired her to do so, that she had gone a little way fur- 
 ther on to an Q-s.ce\\e\i.ileichen-hesorger (which is their 
 name for undertakers), in the same neighbourhood ; 
 and ordered a handsome and serviceable coffin, to be 
 decorated and furnished suitable to the station and 
 means of a noble Englander's family. 
 
 But that she had been so entirely upset and flabber- 
 gasted by the announcement of their sudden departure 
 that morning, that she had utterly forgotten to mention 
 the fact of her having given this most requisite order ; 
 and that now they were all gone^ particularly the young 
 ladv herself, what she should do about the coffin when 
 it came ; or what she must say to the man when he 
 brought it, she could not even think." 
 
 Nor was that all of the strange and wonderful that 
 she, a poor, though honest woman, who had hitherto, 
 she blessed her angels, led a quiet life, undisturbed by 
 any incident since her marriage thirty-two years before, 
 until the last twenty-four hours had if not to endure, 
 to experience. 
 
 Not only had the fair fraulein died, as she had re- 
 lated, and the whole house, herself included, been 
 plunged in grief; but also a desperate gang of burglars, 
 rciuher brigands had attacked, and actually succeeded 
 in breaking into the house ; that the Colonel, brave man, 
 although, asshehad previously described, borne down and
 
 TO LET: A FIRST FLOOR IN LUTTICHAU STRASSE. 245 
 
 bewildered with his loss, had resisted with the courage 
 of a lion, and had alone sustained a hand-to-hand con- 
 flict with the assailants ; that she herself had distinctly- 
 witnessed, no, not witnessed, but listened to the 
 struggle ; but that she and her good husband, who in 
 his time had proved that he was brave enough by 
 having served his time in the Landwehr, and so there 
 was no need now of any further risks, since his courage 
 was established, and he was no longer paid for it ; so 
 that he and herself had hid their heads under their bed 
 clothes, repeating the hymn to Vaterland, what they 
 could remember of the ten commandments, and other 
 prayers, feeling sure that their tenants on the first 
 floor were being murdered, and that their own last hour 
 was come ; but that, after all, the burglars had been 
 foiled in their attempt, their real object having been, 
 so far as she could gather from the report of the ser- 
 vant maid in the morning, not plate or money, — but 
 being either English painters, or perhaps students of 
 medicine in one of the neighbouring Universities, they 
 were trying to seize and carry away the body of the 
 young lady ; attracted by the report of the extraordi- 
 nary beauty and grace of her form when alive, they 
 probably wished to secure it, to embalm either as a 
 model of art or for the further advancement of physical 
 science, she could not quite say which ; but that the
 
 246 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 same maid, having been some years in England, had 
 given her to understand that the stealing, or even 
 taking by force of dead bodies for the afore-mentioned 
 purposes, was quite a common and established prac- 
 tice in that country. 
 
 That might, she went on to remark, have had 
 something to do with the reason of the Colonel's sud- 
 den resolution of leaving her house, and indeed Dresden, 
 on such extraordinary short notice, paying as he had 
 (she again repeated with the same evidently intense 
 satisfaction as before) the full rent for three months 
 with a permission to take in another family even to- 
 morrow, if she were lucky enough to catch one ; and 
 that all letters, bills, accounts, or claims against them 
 which might be sent in — though as to the latter she 
 was ready to testify on oath that they had always paid 
 for everything by the week— but should any arise, the 
 Colonel had left orders that they were to be sent in to 
 his agent, Herr Fusser, in Weisseritz Strasse. 
 
 "But the young lady, the fraulein," I inquired, 
 "what has become of her, then ?" 
 
 "Bless your stars," rejoined the old dame, "what I 
 have to tell you of her you will find to be the 
 strangest and most difficult to believe of all this most 
 strange story, although it may perhaps be after all
 
 TO LET : A FIRST FLOOR IN LUTTICHAU STRASSE. 247 
 
 only in accordance with their other strange island 
 customs, or religious ceremonies. 
 
 "I, Gretchen Speiser, with my own eyes witnessed the 
 frau Harrison taking in a basin of hot consomme to the 
 dead young lady ; and was actually inviting her to rise 
 and try to take some of it ; when turning, she perceived 
 that I had ventured to follow her into the apartment, 
 meaning, as I did, to offer my services if I could in any 
 way be of any assistance to them in their distress, she 
 without ceremony pushed me out and slammed the 
 door rudely upon me. 
 
 " She was always most haughty and of impulsive 
 passions, was the Frau Harrison. 
 
 "But, gnadiger Herr ! I almost fear to be suspected 
 of presuming too much upon your credulity when I 
 inform you that, as I afterwards heard from my hause- 
 mjidchen, whose help for cording up and carrying down 
 their thousand of boxes and packages they were 
 obliged to call in, they actually dressed the poor 
 child's corpse, and laying her upon the mattress be- 
 longing to that narrow and most uncomfortable camp- 
 sofa, on which the Colonel, who was an excellent man, 
 but full of very strange whims, would always insist 
 upon sleeping in preference to any other bed, however 
 luxuriously prepared ; they carried her down upon that
 
 248 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 mattress and took her away with them in the droshky 
 to the railway station. 
 
 " What the inspector of thepolizei will think or say 
 of this strange afi'air when, in accordance with my 
 official invitation, he arrives, I am at a loss to imagine, 
 or indeed the worthy maker of coffins ; they will, I 
 fear, accuse me wrongfully of having deceived and 
 wished to make fools of them. 
 
 " But lo ! as I speak the very words, the leichen- 
 hesonjers are here .'" 
 
 Sure enough at that very moment two fellows 
 carrying between them a lightly-built inner coffin, or 
 shell, I think, one calls it in this country, appeared 
 round the corner of the street. 
 
 Why is it, I often wonder, that one's natural sense 
 of the ridiculous always seems most keenly alive in 
 the very presence of any peculiarly solemn object, or 
 at the moment of any special grief or great trouble ; 
 that such is the case has not every one experienced ? 
 On such occasions as a squeaking baby, or a chirp- 
 ing bird, or more especially a Sunday-school boy 
 " whacked " over the head, in a country church : how 
 such small matters will set a whole congregation gig- 
 ghng, particularly if the sermon happens to be above 
 average dismal; not an individual of which would any-
 
 TO LET: A FIRST FLOOR IN LUTTICHAU STRASSE. 249 
 
 where else have, perhaps, noticed the incident, or if at 
 all, only as a nuisance. 
 
 A lapsus Ungiice of the parson at a funeral, or 
 the chief mourner sitting himself down on his own 
 hat, will often set people off in a roar ; a mere blunder 
 on the part of a blockheaded witness in the most 
 serious trial for murder will produce what the papers 
 parenthesize as " roars of laughter," of which the 
 involuntary perpetrators are themselves ashamed 
 before it is actually over. 
 
 Is it not so ? and does not universal experience in 
 this respect again confirm my views on the great 
 natural law of contraries to which I have before alluded 
 as one of the existing, but little understood principles 
 of natural science ?
 
 250 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER XXIV. 
 
 A GEAVE ORDER ENDS IN GRAVER CONSEQUENCES. 
 
 I WAS led to diverge slightly into certain by-the-bye 
 observations in the end of the last chapter by the re- 
 collection of my own internal sensations as I stood 
 by, witnessing the arrival of the two undertakers' 
 satellites with their dismal burden between them, their 
 faces professionally drawn down into an exaggerated 
 lugubriousness of expression, as they halted, and pro- 
 ceeded to unwrap the black cloth in which the shell 
 "was enveloped ; while there, speechless on the top 
 step stood the landlady watching their operations 
 with an air of helpless and mystified bewilderment, as 
 though voluble as had been the first outburst of her 
 narrative of wonder to myself, who happened to have 
 been the first comer, now that she should have again 
 to explain, account for, and as perhaps she felt, be 
 held personally responsible for all that had so strangely 
 come to pass, fairly overpowered by so much to tell, her 
 ideas seemed to have clubbed themselves in all trying
 
 A GRA VE ORDER ENDS IN GRA VER CONSEQUENCES. 251 
 
 to find vent at once ; and in sheer despair she gave 
 up the attempt as a bad job, and stood gasping with 
 her great mouth wide open like a fresh-landed salmon, 
 as she stared at the undertakers, and they stood and 
 stared back at her. 
 
 One often hears of " dying of laughing," without 
 attaching much literal meaning to the expression ; but 
 at that scene I really laughed to that degree that I 
 thought I must have expired from utter exhaustion ; 
 I laughed myself quite sore, inside and out. 
 
 I am sure my very ribs ached with the pain for two 
 or three days after it. 
 
 And to bring the whole thing to a climax, while 
 they were still standing staring, and I was stamp- 
 ing about the dusty pavement doubled up with 
 laughter, up came the police official in cocked hat 
 and full uniform, attended in due state by two myr- 
 midons, to take the proper notifications of the death, 
 of which he had received notice, as having occurred 
 on the previous evening. 
 
 To attempt to describe the astonishment, incredulity, 
 and other gradual feelings up to unwilling admission 
 of the fact at least of there being no young lady to 
 register as dead, or to bury, would be beyond my 
 humble powers. 
 
 There they were all round the coffin, now laid upon
 
 252 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 the steps, sputtering, shrugging, and all croaking with 
 their hideous guttural jargon at once. One of thepolice 
 seemed inclined to vent his outraged feelings hy an 
 assault upon me for my unseemly merriment, against 
 which I had given up all attempts of struggling ; and 
 he had even made a fierce stride or two towards me, 
 till I heard his superior remind him that I was evi- 
 dently an Englander, and, therefore, better left alone ; 
 so they returned to their confabulation, and ended in 
 going inside to draw up an official account of many 
 pages of the whole transaction, to be signed, and swoi*n 
 to hy the landlady, and her husband, for which they 
 charged them at the rate of half a thaler a page on the 
 spot. 
 
 As for the undertakers, who evidently considered 
 themselves to have been shamefully bilked and ill- 
 used by the defunct, they were for some time in- 
 clined to take their coffin upstairs, and, their right 
 customer having escaped them, to insist upon the 
 landlady herself, who, so far, according to her own 
 account, had ordered it, paying for it, and putting it 
 aw^ay until, as they tried to convince her, she would 
 be sure to find she wanted it some time or other ; but 
 as they would not abate a kreutzer from the full price, 
 it not being, as they argued, second-hand, the old 
 lady stoutly resisted their proposal ; to which, perhaps,
 
 A GRA VE ORDER ENDS AV GRA VER CONSEQUENCES. 253 
 
 if it had been a decided bargain, she might have been 
 more inclined to listen. 
 
 The cocked-hatted official seemed half disposed to 
 see the justice of the undertakers' claim, and to back 
 them in it; when luckily remembering the written 
 order which had been left with her by my uncle, for all 
 accounts, claims, or correspondence to be forwarded to 
 Herr Fusser, and producing the same to the satisfac- 
 tion of all parties concerned, it was decided nem. con. 
 that, under the circumstances, they could not do better 
 than deliver their goods, as per order, forthwith at the 
 house of that respected agent and accountant, and 
 would, no doubt, be fully reimbursed for the same, as 
 well as for their extra trouble. 
 
 So, winding-up with another unanimously voted reso- 
 lution, loudly and most distinctly enunciated, as I 
 flattered myself, for my special behoof, standing by as 
 I still was, determined to see the absurd business out 
 to its very end, to the effect that of all strange and 
 incomprehensible people, Englauders were, as a nation, 
 the most strange and incomprehensible, they adjourned 
 accordingly. 
 
 If I could only have had an idea of what the real 
 end was to be of the affair, the ludicrous commence- 
 ment of which it had thus been ray luck to witness, 
 I would not have missed it for worlds : though the
 
 2bi MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 consequences to which it ultimately led were dire in 
 the extreme, and resulted in a tremendous trial for 
 damages, and whole months of fierce litigation. 
 
 It seems the worthy Herr Fusser, whom I myself 
 knew slightly, having cashed bills through his office, 
 and so on, was on that very same day celebrating with 
 open house the marriage of his only daughter, which 
 had come ofi" that morning, with a prosperous though 
 rather elderly advocate of Dresden, of considerable 
 wealth and position in his profession. 
 
 I use the term of" open house" on this occasion, as 
 the story was told to me, advisedly, for whether inten- 
 tionally, because of the heat of the summer afternoon, 
 or may be from the negligence of the servants, whose 
 attention was distracted by the unusual numbers of 
 friends and relations assembled as they were in the 
 great entrance hall of the old-fashioned mansion, to 
 celebrate the joyful event. Anyhow the double doors 
 of this said hall were left wide open; and right into 
 the midst of the festivity, and circle of said rejoicing 
 friends, and relatives, the two undertakers made their 
 way ; and, excited I suppose, partly by the heat, 
 through which they had carried their burden so far, 
 partly perhaps by the sense of having been hoaxed 
 and disappointed, — feeling that they had right on their 
 side, and were acting under the immediate counte-
 
 A GRA VE ORDER ENDS IN GRA VER CONSEQUENCES. 255 
 
 nance and advice of the police ; — depositing the ghastly 
 object on a great table in the centre with a bang, 
 before any one could recover from their astonish oient 
 and horror, had there left it without one word more 
 of explanation than that they had brought it accord- 
 ing to orders, and would call next day for their 
 money. 
 
 You may I daresay picture to yourself as well as I 
 can the scene which arose upon this most unlooked- 
 for apparition. 
 
 The ladies, of course, as they would have done in 
 all countries, set to work fainting ; the lovely bride 
 went off into screeching hysterics, and was taken so 
 seriously ill on the spot, that they said, — well, never 
 mind what they said, for I abhor scandal, and it has 
 nothing to do with the story. 
 
 But in her ravings she frequently reiterated the 
 name of an unfortunate lover, a very handsome, but 
 as I was informed, very good-for-nothing young 
 scamp of a student in the medical line, who had, it 
 seems, publicly vowed dire vengeance against the 
 false and fickle damsel herself, her father, and his more 
 successful rival, her present respectable bridegroom. 
 
 On hearing these ejaculations, Herr Fusser, boiling 
 over with the natural feelings of an indignant parent, 
 without any further thought or inquiry, immediately
 
 256 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 jumped at a not improbable conclusiou, in which 
 indeed he was unanimously supported by the opinion 
 of the whole of his guests to a man, to the effect that 
 this unlooked-for apparition must be an infamous 
 practical joke and plot on the part of the discarded 
 rival : he accordingly rushed out of his house blind 
 with fury, and intent on all manner of mischief should 
 he meet with the author of so audacious an insult 
 and outrage as that which had been offered him. 
 
 As his evil destiny would have it, whom should he 
 run right against, within a hundred yards of his own 
 door, but the wretched lover himself in the lowest 
 depths of despair; still, in spite of himself, hanging 
 about the scenes of his once looked-for happiness, 
 now blighted by disappointment and misery. 
 
 Some people indeed averred that he was only 
 looking for a good deep place in the Weisseritz canal 
 to drown himself, and his son'ows, at the very threshold 
 of the false one, when, without one word of explanation 
 or notice, Herr Fusser, usually the most peaceful and 
 well-ordered of men, flew upon him^ slapped, scratched, 
 and spat in his face ; and then, as they rolled together 
 in the dust, in a desperate struggle, using the sharp 
 end of a shoeing-horn, which he had caught up as the 
 nearest weapon at hand, when rushing outtbrough his 
 hall, he then and there gouged a most frightful gash
 
 A GRA VE ORDER ENDS IN GRA VER CONSEQUENCES. 257 
 
 across the cheek of his most innocent and undeserving 
 victim. 
 
 There was of course the very deuce to pay. The 
 police were brought up to the row, and it ended in all 
 the parties concerned, bride and bridegroom included, 
 being carried off to prison, and there having to pass 
 many months of incarceration before the aflPair was 
 finally expiated, and the damages arranged. 
 
 VOL. I.
 
 258 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER XXV. 
 
 TROUBLES NEVER COME ALONE. 
 
 Although, as I tell you, I did not actually witness 
 the tragico-comic denouement to the episode of the 
 repudiated coffin, yet almost directly after they had 
 occurred the whole particulars came to my knowledge 
 under rather unlooked-for circumstances. 
 
 Having as I fancied seea the whole fun through to 
 its end, little dreaming of course how much more was 
 still fated to ensue, I had gone to the hotel for my 
 dinner, and from thence returned leisurely to my 
 lodgings, still over and over again bursting into such 
 fits of laughter as to make many of the worthy 
 Dresdenites turn their heads round to look after me, 
 every time the absurdity of the scene I had witnessed, 
 again and again tickled my inward gizzard, or what- 
 ever the anatomical contrivance within me is which 
 produces that particular demonstration of hilarity. 
 
 I stood for a minute or two to have a good laugh 
 ■well out at the door step of my own lodgings, bat no
 
 TROUBLES NEVER COME ALONE. 259 
 
 sooner, having given that really last necessary vent to 
 my highly titillated feelings, had I mounted the flight 
 of stairs leading up to my own room, than I and my 
 laughter too, were brought up short by the sight of 
 what at that moment met my astonished gaze upon 
 the landing-place. 
 
 I had left the key in the door when I went out that 
 afternoon, so that old Mother Slanngiirtz might get in 
 to put the place to rights. 
 
 There, I say, piled up outside, first struck my 
 astonished view, my own portmanteaus, hag, and 
 boxes, which, upon closer investigation I found 
 to have been packed, that is, at least, filled with all 
 my clothes, which had been pulled out of the ward- 
 robe and the drawers in my bedroom, and all bun- 
 dled in anyhow, all higgledy-piggledy. There were 
 various other of my goods and chattels, including 
 sundry choice little pieces of Dresden china, which I 
 had from time to time picked up, German drinking 
 tankards, foils, fencing masks, boots of all sorts and 
 sizes, books, portfolios, my most precious travelling 
 clock, my dressing case, all heaped up, one thing atop 
 •of another, the whole being crowned by my portable 
 bath, still Avi'inging wet ; in short, all my worldly 
 possessions turned out as if for sale by auction, before 
 
 there had been time to ticket and arrange them. 
 
 o «>
 
 260 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 I was yet standing quite aghast with wrath and as- 
 tonishment, when my landhidy, who had evidently 
 been waiting in ambuscade behind this miscellaneous 
 outwork of her own construction, stepped forth, and 
 without vouchsafing one word of preface or expla- 
 nation, handed me a rewritten edition of the notice to 
 quit whicli I had treated so unceremoniously while at 
 breakfast. 
 
 Having exactly deducted the rent of one week from 
 the sum total due to her, which she seemed to con- 
 sider, and for all I know, she may have been all right 
 according to the law in that country, as equivalent to 
 giving me notice for that same period, as covenanted 
 between us, the amount of her demands came to 
 about a jjon?/ or thereabouts, calculating in round 
 numbers. 
 
 I suppose you know enough of sporting slang to 
 understand that, or say, then, five-and-twenty pounds, 
 if you would rather ; though a hundred and sixty- 
 eight thalers seven and a half groschen makes a deal 
 more noise for the money, doesn't it ? 
 
 That was the exact sum, I remember, due for several 
 weeks' rent, besides breakfasts, postage, and many 
 other sundries. And the spiteful old wretch demanded 
 instant payment, and that I should then take myself 
 and mv good?, all of which she had, as I have de-
 
 TROUBLES NEVER COME ALONE. 261 
 
 scribed, turned out of my room, off to some other 
 quarters. 
 
 She had me, you see, in a regular corner there, con- 
 found her ; and I think she was fully aware of it too, 
 always poking her nose, as she was, whenever she 
 found a chance, into all my drawers and places ; for 
 the unlucky fact was, that I had not many days be- 
 fore changed my last ten-pound circular note, and at 
 the time had not three blessed thalers left to my 
 name. 
 
 I had been daily intending to write home for rein- 
 forcements, but had been so much occupied by all I have 
 been telling you, that I had not found time to do so ; 
 so there I found myself in a regular fix. 
 
 I tried at first what soft sawder would do, and be- 
 gan attempting to coax the old toad, but that was no 
 go ; her back was too much up at the way in which I 
 had treated her former notice with contempt. The 
 injured tone, and even spice of bullying I next 
 resorted to were equally inefficacious. 
 
 She and her dunderheaded numskull of a husband, 
 whom she had summoned up from the realms below, 
 only stuck doggedly to their demand for payment, and 
 then instant quittance ; for that as to allowing me to 
 sleep another night under that roof, after the distur- 
 bances, hardships, and insults they had undergone from
 
 262 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 myself and my ill chosen friends, they Avere deter- 
 mined that no mortal persuasion should induce them 
 to consent to anything of the sort. As to my plea of 
 impecuniosity, that, they declared, they had nothing 
 ' to do with, and did not believe in ; or anyhow, if I had 
 no money in my purse, I could go to my banker and 
 get some. 
 
 I doubted very much in my own mind whether the 
 bankerwould bewillingto advance me the required sum 
 upon the strength of my bare word as to an expected 
 remittance. The continental bankers have been, I am 
 sorry to say, so often let in, that their former un- 
 bounded confidence in the honesty of the British 
 tourist has, not without reason, been considerably 
 shaken ; besides, I knew well that by that hour all 
 the bureaux were long since closed, and that it would 
 be hopeless to look for any of their occupants, had I 
 even had any claim upon them for money in the 
 regular way, let alone going to ask for an advance as 
 a favour. 
 
 However, driven into such a fix as I was, I w rote 
 a note upon the chance to Herr Fusser, who being, I 
 knew, the agent, as well as personal friend of my uncle 
 the Colonel, I thought more likely to assist me in 
 my dilemma than any one else ; and never, of course, 
 guessing all that had happened to the poor man, sent it
 
 TROUBLES NEVER COME ALONE. 263: 
 
 off by a messenger, and made up my mind to wait 
 where I was, upon the landing, until I should receive 
 an answer, or, as I had politely ventured to intimate in 
 my note, perhaps even he might himself come per- 
 sonally to see and advise me under my present adverse 
 circumstances. 
 
 I did not exactly fancy leaving all my private pro- 
 perty, loose and unprotected as it was, to the mercy or 
 forbearance of the whole household, or, indeed, of 
 anybody who might choose to walk in at the open 
 front door. 
 
 I had given up, as a bad job, any further hopes of 
 prevailing upon the people of the house to let me go 
 back into my room, even for that night ; and was 
 attempting to put some of my stray articles a little 
 into order, when happening to look round, I caught 
 the villain Slanngartz coolly occupied with my writing 
 case, \Yith his great stupid face peering into the inner 
 compartments, which he had opened, I suppose, really 
 to satisfy himself whether I had any money there or 
 not. 
 
 I was quite glad that it was the man, and not his 
 wife, for to tell the truth, I was just ready for some 
 vent for the anger which I daresay you can give me full 
 credit for feeling, at the pleasant little surprise which 
 had thus been got up to meet me on my return home»
 
 264 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 Before he was aware, I had caught the fellow by 
 one of his huge lop ears, and sent him flying down 
 the stairs, with a well-directed application of my toe, 
 faster than I suppose my friend had ever found him- 
 self moving in his whole life before, right into the 
 arms of a police officer who at that very instant, as if 
 by magic, appeared in the doorway. 
 
 I recognised him in an instant as one of the iden- 
 tical cocked-hatted swells who had been in Liittichau 
 Strasse — the very one who had taken such offence at 
 me for my disrespectful laughter. 
 
 Why he should have jumped up there like a jack- 
 in-the-box, at that particular moment, I cannot say. 
 Whether he had been quietly dogging my steps 
 ever since, having marked something suspicious in 
 my demeanour or appearance ; or whether, as I am 
 rather incliiied to think, the fact of his being the 
 same individual was a mere coincidence, and that he 
 was only iu collusion with the landlady ; who, perhaps, 
 anticipating a row, in consequence of her summary 
 mode of ejectment, had taken the precautionary 
 measure of having a guardian of the peace near at 
 hand ; and he being, as I have already stated, in full 
 fig for his other official visit, his superiors had not 
 thouglit it worth while to dress out another for the 
 occasion.
 
 TROUBLES NEVER COME ALONE. 265 
 
 However it came to pass, there he was ; and drawing 
 his long sword, like a hero, as soon as he had re- 
 covered from the shock of old Slanngartz, who 
 rebounded from off his manly chest just like an india- 
 rubber ball, he rushed clattering up the stairs, and, 
 waving his glittering blade within an inch of my 
 nose, as I discreetly drew back, hemmed me into a 
 corner in no time. 
 
 While still in that ignominious position, I confess 
 I thought myself well off to be allowed to come to a 
 parley with the enemy ; the result of which was, ray 
 promising that if he would put up his weapon, really 
 dangerous as I felt it to be in the hands of an un- 
 educated rascal, and in the gross misuse of which the 
 authorities are always ready enough to hack their myr- 
 midons, except luckily for me at that time there existed 
 amongst them a proper respect for Milord Pal-mere- 
 stone before their eyes. I agreed with him then, if 
 he would put up his sword, to be taken quietly whither- 
 soever he might feel it his duty to conduct me ; 
 only further stipulating that w^e should first return all 
 my things iuto the room, and, having locked the 
 door, that I should keep possession of the key until 
 I knew what was to be my fate. 
 
 This proposal of mine, after no end of loud talk 
 and wrangling, ended in a compromise, by having the
 
 266 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 key delivered up to the custody of the police himself, 
 as a neutral party ; and that matter being settled, for 
 the time at least, I had nothing for it but to surrender, 
 and be taken under the conduct of the stern offi- 
 cial, to answer for my transgressions, to wit, a violent 
 personal assault and battery upon my landlord, at the 
 principal police station. 
 
 I must tell you that, just as we were starting, my 
 messenger to Herr Fusser had returned with my note 
 unopened, and his face distorted with astonishment 
 and dismay, as he gasped out a most confused account 
 of all that had happened in the establishment of that 
 respected citizen. 
 
 That he had found the whole house and neigh- 
 bourhood in an uproar — that Herr Fusser's Frmdein 
 had been married only that very morning — that she 
 had run away directly after the ceremony ^Yith the old 
 medical attendant of the family ; that the deserted 
 bridegroom had turned upon, and denounced the 
 wretched father for treachery, and connivance in the 
 elopement ; that they, but whether the doctor or the 
 bridegroom, he was not sure, but stated both or either 
 of them indiscriminately, had fought a duel with Herr 
 Fusser in front of his own door ; and that one, or both,, 
 or all of them had been slain on the spot (in that part he 
 was again in much mental obfuscation) ; as to precisely
 
 TROUBLES NEVER COME ALONE. 267 
 
 which of them v/as the dead one, he was not certain, 
 but for one he coukl vouch on oath, having with his 
 own eyes seen him in his coffin, that was, he had seen 
 the coffin, which must have had somebody in it, on 
 the great table in the middle of the hall. 
 
 Upon being cross and recross- examined, the poor 
 boy, — he was only a street gamin promiscuously picked 
 up, — became so hopelessly involved in contradictions 
 and palpable inventions in his account of what really 
 had happened, that the grim policeman, losing all 
 patience, had felt it to be his duty to take him also 
 into custody ; I suppose as an accessory after the fact, 
 whatever the foundation of his strange tale might even- 
 tually turn out to be ; or, more likely, only too glad of 
 a chance of an official excuse for putting his finger in 
 the pie of, what seemed by all accounts to be, a 
 criminal affair of unusual importance. 
 
 So the bewildered street boy and myself were 
 marched off together, companions in misfortune, with 
 Mother Slanngiirtz in her state bonnet and shawl, for 
 which we had had to wait while she retired to bedeck 
 herself, and her in every way inferior half, who came 
 as prosecutors and plaintifis bringing up the rear.
 
 268 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 CHAPTER XXVI. 
 
 CIVIS ROMANUS SUM! 
 
 Through the gloom of the descending shades of 
 evening, the wistful eye of the closely guarded pri- 
 soner in vain souglit the beetling heights of the ponder- 
 ous, and awe-inspiring portal ; as the late highly re- 
 spected Mr. G. P. R. James would have described the 
 entrance to the common prison ; that is if, like myself 
 up to that time, he had never liappened to have seen 
 them. 
 
 Had he done so, truth would have compelled him to 
 describe the gates, or rather large door which we 
 entered, as a very commonplace, unnoticeable en- 
 trance, dingy enough, and suggesting to the senses 
 an atmosphere of bad smells and frowsiness. 
 
 And such a discordant clatter and croaking, and 
 cawing, for all the world like a disturbed rookery, as 
 we found going on in the court or rather open 
 yard, into which we passed from a long dimly- 
 lighted passage, would, I think, have puzzled even
 
 CIVIS ROM ANUS SUM I 269 
 
 that most voluminous of novelists to have found 
 words adequately to describe. 
 
 The unfortunate Herr Fusser, and his still more un- 
 fortunate victim of mistaken vengeance, with as many 
 others of their party and family circle as they seemed to 
 have indiscriminately laid hold of, had only just before 
 been brought in; and were then awaiting the arrival of 
 some of the judges or higher magisterial authorities, 
 who had been specially summoned for a case of such 
 important and aggravated disorder. 
 
 Thus it was that I so thoroughly picked up the full 
 and true particulars of the whole story, as I have re- 
 lated them to you. 
 
 Itwas very late before that matter was heard through, 
 and the whole lot of them remanded, and ordered to be 
 shut up, and put on prisoners' treatment, without the 
 slightest knowledge or certainty of when theirtrial might 
 come on ; which, far as I could make out, on inquiry, 
 might be three days thence, or not till the next year, just 
 as chance or other circumstances over which nobody 
 seemed to have any control, might rule the matter ; 
 in this case, as it eventually turned out, it ^vas, as I 
 subsequently saw in the papers, ever so many months 
 before all, more or less concerned, were well out of the 
 business. 
 
 When mv turn at last came on, I was, I must con-
 
 270 3IELCHI0R GOBIES. 
 
 fess, not a little taken aback when my particular 
 gendarme, or Pol'ize'idiener, wliicli is, I believe, the 
 correct Saxon title by ■which those official and officious 
 geniuses call themselves, stood forth and brought his 
 charge against me ; not, as I expected, for a summary 
 assault upon a peaceful citizen, which, though I 
 could not attempt to deny, I had been mentally pre- 
 paring, in my best German, to justify, or at least ex- 
 tenuate by describing the extreme provocation I had 
 received. 
 
 Not a bit of it. Utterly omitting, or, I suppose, 
 having in the interval of time forgotten the actual 
 affair for which, as I fancied, I had mainly rendered 
 myself liable to the powers of the law, with a profu- 
 sion of gesticulations and guggling rhetoric he based 
 his accusation against me ; firsts for petty treason, and 
 a wilful insult towards the dignity and honour of the 
 sovereign, and whole governing powers of the realm, 
 inasmuch as I had dared in the open streets to jeer- 
 ingly laugh at, and treat with ridicule, himself and his 
 companions in arms, although dressed in their full 
 municipal uniform, and at the time engaged in the 
 discharge of one of the most solemn functions of their 
 official duties. 
 
 Secondly, that being already marked by the police 
 as addicted to irregular and intemperate habits, I, witli
 
 CI VIS ROMAN us SUM 1 271 
 
 other evil associates on whom the authorities had also 
 an eye, had within the last few nights been guilty of 
 battering in doors, and forcibly breaking into unpro- 
 tected houses; disturbing his Majesty King John's 
 liege subjects from their peaceful beds. 
 
 And thirdly, that when in consequence of my gross 
 misconduct and immoral habits, I had been warned by 
 my landlady, a most respectable and loyal citizen of 
 moderate competence, to leave her lodgings, I had 
 treated her with familiarity and insult ; and upon the 
 most frivolous and groundless excuses had refused to 
 pay her one groschen of the large sum of money due 
 to her for rent, alleging that I had no money or 
 means of liquidating her just claims ; thereby confess- 
 ing and proving myself, in addition to my other enor- 
 mities, to be no better than a common cheat and 
 swindler. 
 
 And so the rascal was allowed by the functionary at 
 the desk to run on, warming in his eloquence, and, as 
 I verily believe, carried on to say much more than he 
 had himself intended, or even thought of when he first 
 started. 
 
 It proved to me, as I had suspected, that it was a 
 regular " plant;" that is, that there had been a previous 
 understanding between him and Frau Slanngiirtz, 
 and that finding me to be the same party who
 
 272 MELCniOR GORLES. 
 
 had dared to laugh at him, he was only too glad of 
 the chance of so soon avenging his own offended 
 dignity. 
 
 But, as I have said, the worthy citizen Slanngurtz's 
 flying kick downstairs was utterly forgotten ; whether 
 it was, as only a lesser offence, merged in the greater 
 crime of having been wanting in respect to his own 
 uniform, or whether my prosecutor had been so in- 
 terested in the denouement of Herr Fusser, and the 
 coffin catastrophe, that that incident had the effect of 
 driving the particulars of his own story out of his 
 mind ; or whether, (the scandalous thought would ob- 
 trude itself into my mind), next to his own he took 
 more interest in Madame Slanngiirtz's wrongs than an 
 impartial guardian of the peace ought to do, and was 
 not altogether sorry to see her lawful husband getting 
 his deserts, I cannot presume to give as a precise 
 reason. 
 
 Perhaps, after all, the poor man's memory was na- 
 turally and constitutionally impei'fect : I had rather 
 begun to think so when he stood there so quietly, as a 
 simple spectator, or rather listener, to the whole charge 
 in Herr Fusser's case. I had at first fully expected 
 to see him step forward officiously, only too delighted 
 to be able to give an explanation of the previous 
 chapter in the history of that coffin ; but he did not
 
 CI VIS ROM ANUS SUM! 273 
 
 seem to think it necessary to appear to know anything 
 about the matter, and cast a significant gknce at me, 
 which I perfectly understood, to convey that by keep- 
 ing our own counsel and holding our tongues, we 
 should both save oui'selves from a deal of trouble and 
 complicated explanation. 
 
 It was too base of the ruffian after that familiar 
 glance and secret passage of confidence between us to 
 pitch it in so hot and strong against me, as he subse- 
 quently did ; but he was carried perhaps further than 
 he himself intended by the torrent of his eloquence, 
 to say nothing of other potent feelings ; and indeed 
 would, I am sure, have gone on much longer if he 
 had not been cut short by the presiding official, who, 
 without asking for, or listening to any defence on my 
 part, summarily inflicted a fine upon me of ten 
 thalers, that is just thirty "bob," for insulting a 
 government officer in his uniform, and while in 
 execution of his duty, which I must pay instantly, or 
 be locked up for the night. 
 
 As to the claim of the large sum (a few pounds 
 always do look such a frightful lot either in specie or 
 on paper, when translated into thalers or florins), for 
 so many weeks' rent, the " Beamte," i.e., Beak, who was 
 not quite such a fool as he looked, pronounced it to 
 be no fraud or matter for the police court, but a simple 
 
 VOL. I. T
 
 274 MELCniOR GORLES. 
 
 debt ; still, as I was there, and had not the means, or 
 refused to pay the demand, which could be sworn to 
 as a just one, I might as well be detained in the other 
 part of the prison as a debtor, and there kept until I 
 could either shell out, or get somebody to give security 
 for me. It was not the slightest use on my part trying 
 to expostulate or explain. 
 
 I could not pay the fine, because I had not above 
 half a dozen ten-groschen pieces in the world. I tried 
 to make them understand that, under the circum- 
 stances, I might have procured the money, even at 
 that late hour, if it had not been for the misfortunes 
 of my respected friend Herr Fusser. 
 
 That assertion they looked upon as a most impu- 
 dent and desperate ruse to serve my immediate pur- 
 pose ; in short, a barefaced invention of the moment. 
 
 In vain I begged to be put to the very easy test of 
 confronting the said unfortunate gentleman, within 
 their very walls as he was. With their most obtuse and 
 pig-headed views of justice, I could only receive as a 
 reply to my most common-sense suggestion, that so 
 far from Herr Fusser being able to help me, or say 
 anything in my favour, I ought rather to be ashamed 
 of claiming an acquaintance wdth a man who was now 
 a convicted felon (he had not yet been tried), and a 
 wilful murderer, and that the fact of his knowing me.
 
 CIVIS ROMANUS SUM ! 275 
 
 which they did not for a moment believe, only corrobo- 
 rated the court's previously formed bad opinion of 
 me. 
 
 Finding fair words of no avail, I tried on the deep 
 indignation tone, and even with threats took to the 
 " Civis Eomaniis sum " dodge, and thundered the 
 dreaded name of the noble Viscount then at the head 
 of the Foreign Office in their ears. 
 
 That seemed to stagger them a bit ; but on examin- 
 ing my passport, which by chance I happened to have 
 with me in my pocket-book, the name of that widely- 
 reputed nobleman was not to be found in the docu- 
 ment ; either Lord C , or Lord M I think it 
 
 was, had been at the Foreign Office when I had taken 
 out that passport for a vacation trip a year or two 
 before. So the great sprawling coat of arms and sup- 
 porters at the bottom of the document, with the signa- 
 ture, of course, utterly illegible, were somehow different 
 from what they seemed accustomed to. They next be- 
 came convinced that I was not an Englishman at all ; 
 and one particularly sagacious looking wiseacre, having 
 made out that my residence was described as being in 
 the Isle of Wight, which, as you know, is the case, 
 actually took upon himself to declare that the said 
 island was off the coast of Denmark, and that I was in 
 reality a Danish subject, having the impudence to pass 
 
 T 2
 
 276 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 myself off and to try to frighten them by pretending 
 to be an Englander. Well, it was getting very hxte, 
 and the oflBcials very tired, so, after some more alter- 
 cation, they agreed among themselves that the best 
 ^vay to make sure of me would be to shut me up till 
 the morning; which, even supposing it should all prove 
 a mistake, could not make much difference to me as a 
 private individual. 
 
 The long and the short of it all was that I was 
 taken round to the debtors' side of the public prison ; 
 and there, not, however, without having knocked over 
 two or three of them, for, finding them alike deaf to 
 any arguments or reason, I lost all command of my 
 temper, and declared that nothing but main force should 
 compel me to undergo such rank injustice, it took 
 no less than four of them to carry me by main force 
 into one of their colls, which was about the size of a 
 respectable dog kennel; and then the door was locked 
 upon me, and I was left to my reflections. 
 
 There was not even a chair or stool to sit down upon ; 
 nothing but a table or rather hanging shelf attached to 
 the wall by hinges, one of which was broken, and a 
 narrow truckle bed, on which was a very filthy straw 
 palliasse, covered by a more filthy blanket or rug of 
 some description. 
 
 As far as I could make out by the light of a lamp
 
 CI VIS ROMA NUS SUM I 277 
 
 wliicli shone througli a small opening over the door, 
 the place itself was not quite so beastly as perhaps I 
 had expected to lind it, but the closeness and fusty 
 sensation were almost intolerable. 
 
 The only pretence of ventilation, as far as I could 
 make out, was through the hole I have mentioned 
 above the doorway, and a grating of half a foot square 
 made in the door itself. 
 
 Through that same grating, for some time after the 
 door had been locked upon me, I could hear a dis- 
 cussion going on, as well as I could make out, at the 
 further end of the corridor, as to my real nationality. 
 I rather lancy my last struggle, and stout resistance to 
 authority, may have done more to convince them than 
 all my arguments and asseverations, though I could 
 not make out all they were cawing about, like rooks at 
 hatching time (to which, by the way, I think I have 
 before compared them), still I could distinguish some- 
 thing of doubts or contrariwise opinions among them- 
 selves in the tones of their voices : it ended in one who 
 seemed to have succeeded in out-talking, if not con- 
 vincing his jabbering companions, coming back to my 
 door, and suggesting that if I really were an English- 
 man, as I alleged, materials would, if I wished it, be 
 provided to write a note to the British Minister, which 
 should, together with my doubtful passport, be at
 
 1278 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 once forwarded by a messenger whom they would pro- 
 cure for me. 
 
 This ofiFer was made, I suspect, as a deep and subtle 
 test ; but of course I was too glad to jump at it, and 
 should myself have suggested the idea, had I not 
 thought that it would have been refused.
 
 CHAPTER XXVIL 
 
 " A FRIEND IN NEED" NOT ALWAYS APPRECIATED. 
 
 The note, stating my predicament and the sum for 
 which I was arrested, was soon written and despatched 
 to our Minister's house in Waisen-Haus Strasse — with 
 my usual ill luck, the secretary, my most intimate 
 friend, was, I knew, away on a few days' visit in the 
 
 country : old F , the Minister himself, had gone 
 
 off to some baths or other for the benefit of the health 
 of one of his precious little black Pomeranian dogs, to 
 whom he was most specially devoted : the only per- 
 son left to take charge of the affairs and interests of 
 H.B.M. and her travelling subjects, was a harum- 
 scarum young scamp of an attache, of whom I had but a 
 very slight personal acquaintance, but happened to 
 have heard enough of his habits, to be pretty sure that 
 by that time of night, or indeed since the opera was 
 over, he would be nobody knew where, unless the crafty 
 Stilskins could be put upon his track. 
 
 Rumple Stilskins himself happened to be the very
 
 280 MELCHIOR GORLEb'. 
 
 first fellow hit upon as a messenger when my letter was 
 taken out to the gate. 
 
 He was not allowed, as he greatly desired to do, to 
 come in to see me, but sent in a message to say that 
 he had been to my lodgiugs, and there hearing of my 
 arrest, had come down after me to the prison. 
 
 He had something very particular to tell me, and I, 
 quite forgetting that I had sent him on the special 
 errand of finding out Gorles for me, could not at the 
 time imngine what it could be that he thus wanted. 
 
 Not much reckoning upon any answer to my 
 despatch before the morning, I had nothing for it but 
 to make up my mind to bear my fate as philosophically 
 as I could ; and so, carefully eschewing the bed, I curled 
 myself up in a corner, and I suppose must have dozed 
 off in a sort of dog's snooze for some little time. 
 
 I was quite surprised to find it was so late when 
 roused up, as I suddenly was by a great clatter of 
 bolts and clanking chains, for all the world like the 
 entry of a " ruthless castellan " and his " murderous 
 myrmidons" in a play. I was surprised, I say, to 
 hear a great clock ring out one. My door was thrown 
 open, and with a great blaze of light, which at first 
 quite bedazzled and struck me stupid, an old white- 
 moustached swell, whom I took to be the head of the 
 whole concern, I mean the police establishment, came
 
 "A FRIEND IN NEED" NOT APPRECIATED. 281 
 
 in to tell me that I was free, and at liberty to walk 
 out when I liked. 
 
 "Is any onefromthe British Chancellerie come, then, 
 or waiting to see me ?" I iu(|uired. It was not so. 
 "His Excellency the Minister was away from Dresden" 
 — that I knew; "the honourable the secretary was also 
 absent " — of that, as I have said before, I was also 
 aware ; " the honourable attache could nowhere be 
 found" — that I had expected. 
 
 " The messenger, therefore, with that natural sagacity 
 for which the sworn chairmen were always so conspi- 
 cuous, had carried my note and passport to a noble 
 compatriot of mine, whom he knew to be an intimate 
 frieud of my own, as indeed he reported that he had, 
 by my own special directions, been employed the 
 greater part of the day in seeking the same gentle- 
 man out. That he, although gone to bed, had instantly, 
 like a noble Englander as he was, taken steps for 
 assisting his compatriot in distress ; against whom, but 
 for the unfounded assertions and misrepresentations of 
 the infatuated underling, who had so solemnly declared 
 my Excellency to have been only a Dane, nothing 
 would have induced them to proceed to the extreme 
 measures, for which they now begged me to accept 
 their excuses," and so on. 
 
 I fancy they had begun to feel they had rather
 
 282 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 put their foot iu it, though for my part, I rather 
 wondered that they had not increased the fine for 
 punching their thick heads, in the way I had done, 
 for some of them while higging me all along the cor- 
 ridor into my cell. 
 
 However, having satisfactorily ascertained that I 
 really was an Englishman, I suppose Stilskins's tes- 
 timony had convinced them of that fact; and what was 
 more, having received the amount of the deht and the 
 fine for which I was most illegally held in durance, 
 'they only seemed now too anxious to get me clear off 
 the premises at once before morning, " now that all 
 had been paid and so satisfactorily settled by a noble 
 English milord," as the functionary pompously ex- 
 pressed it. 
 
 " All paid and settled by a noble English milord ?" I 
 said; "but who and where is he?" and I certainly 
 began to wonder whether it was some good fellow, 
 perhaps an old Eton friend, who might remember my 
 name, and staying at one of the hotels on his way 
 through Dresden, had accidentally heard of my deten- 
 tion ; or even a stranger taking pity on a compatriot 
 iu such a scrape might have generously done the 
 handsome though imprudent thing, in the shape of 
 helping me with a temporary loan. 
 
 I was informed that my friend-in-need having sent
 
 « 
 
 "A FRIEND IN NEED'' NOT APPRECIATED. 283 
 
 "back the messenger to ascertain the exact liabilities — 
 those yellow-jacket fellows are all well known, and are 
 sworn in to honesty and secrecy, and may be, and 
 often are trusted with untold value in specie, to say 
 nothing of reputations — had remitted the required 
 sum, a hundred and seventy-eight thalers, odd gros- 
 chen, which included the iine for insulting the official 
 dignity, by the same hand; begging that the receipt 
 and full discharge for the same might be handed to 
 myself, together with a note which he then presented 
 to me. 
 
 Actuated, I think, more by curiosity to know who 
 on earth my generous friend could possibly be than with 
 any another feeling at the moment, though, of course, 
 not slightly grateful and pleased at the same time, I 
 tore open the envelope ; and just picture to yourself 
 my astonishment and overwhelming indignation when 
 turning, as I naturally did, to the further end of the 
 
 last page first, I recognised the signature of who 
 
 do you think ? Melchior Gokles I 
 
 "My Dear Lambard (the note ran), — 
 
 " I have but this moment heard of your disagree- 
 able position. Your messenger, who can find nobody 
 in at the Chancellerie, very sensibly brought your note 
 on to me, which, taking the liberty of an old friend, I
 
 284 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 opened, and am too ha^^py to be able to assist you in your 
 temporary difficulty. I am sorry that I am not able to 
 come myself to you to-night, but am suffering from a 
 severely sprained ankle, ^Yhicb, however, will not, I 
 hope, prevent my starting from Dresden as I intend 
 to do by the 5 a.m. train to-morrow, on most important 
 affairs, which, unluckily for my poor leg, admit of no 
 delay; I am so very sorry thus to be prevented from this 
 chance of personally renciwiug our old acquaintance. 
 Whenever convenient, as my address may for some 
 time be doubtful, let your London banker pay the trifle, 
 with which I have so luckily been able to accommodate 
 you, into Coutts's to the account of 
 
 " Your old friend, and ever most sincerely, 
 
 "MeLCHIOPv GORLES. 
 
 " P.S. — Though it is now many years since we have 
 met, I have, you see, taken it for granted that the 
 Mr. Frank Lambard whose note, under the peculiar 
 circumstances as told me by the messenger, I have 
 ventured upon opening, is the same F. Lambard who 
 will remember the above signature as an old Eton 
 schoolfellow ; if not, I am only too happy as an Eng- 
 lishman, to be the means of serving any one who 
 bears a once so familiar name." 
 
 I had to read this letter right through and over
 
 "A FRIEND IN NEED" NOT APPRECIATED. 285 
 
 again a second time before I seemed to be able to take 
 it in, I was so positively staggered, morally wound- 
 up, so to speak. Then just rolling myself back into my 
 corner, and quite choking as I was with rage and dis- 
 gust, and a sort of indefinite terror such as one some- 
 times feels in a nightmare, I regularly set to to 
 blubber, as I had never done since I was a lower 
 boy at school of twelve years old. 
 
 The police stood at first gaping at me with astonish- 
 ment ; and then themselves, for there were three or 
 four of them standing in the doorway, seemed sud- 
 denly seized with a strong sympathy for what they, I 
 suppose, took for my finely -wrought feelings ; and hang 
 me, if the lot of them didn't cast up their eyes to 
 heaven, and with a sort of crooning chorus actually 
 begin to howl and weep in concert with me ! 
 
 The absurdity, though at the time it only exas- 
 perated me more, brought me back into some sort of 
 recollection of myself. Springing up, I ordered them 
 to be gone, and to leave me to myself to get through 
 the night in peace. 
 
 "But, pardon ; I was free ; all demands had been fully 
 settled and satisfied, nothing remained to them but 
 the pleasing duty of ushering me to the outer 
 door." 
 
 " Get out !" I said. " You do not suppose I am going
 
 2SG MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 to accept a favour, a token of personal friendship, from* 
 the Devil, do you ?" 
 
 They all shrugged their shoulders and rolled the 
 yellows of their eyes at me. " Do you think that, even 
 to escape the discomfort of passing a night in this 
 filthy dog-hole, I am going to owe my freedom to a 
 little imp of Satan, whose neck I have every intention 
 of wringing the first time I fall in with him ? — whom I 
 should probably have got hold of and murdered by 
 this time, if you rascals hadn't got hold of me." 
 
 Now, perhaps, considering that the parties thus 
 strongly addressed had not been behind the scenes, 
 and could not have had an idea of the real circum- 
 stances, it is not much to be wondered at, now I can 
 calmly look back to that time, that they should seem 
 to think my sentiments or declarations a little strange. 
 But I was far too enraged and disgusted to consider, 
 or care a rap what they thought. 
 
 " But, mein herr," said the white-muzzled official, 
 " your liabilities and fine are paid ; we have no longer 
 any legal cause or pretence, and therefore no pov^er to 
 detain you here, and our orders are to conduct you at 
 once to the outer gates ; the governor, who has been 
 expressly roused and referred to in this matter, him- 
 self desired me to see these orders immediately carried 
 into eflfect."
 
 "A FRIEND IN NEED" NOT APPRECIATED. 287 
 
 " Then my orders are, you old fool, to get out of 
 this, and go hack to your governor and tell him from 
 me that I do not choose to accept the assistance or to 
 acknowledge the payments made on my hehalf from a 
 stranger, and a person who, so far from being any friend 
 of mine, I have not even seen for years and never wish 
 to see again, though I have been on the look-out for 
 him, and mean to break every bone in his skin, if not 
 kill him outright, whenever I do lind him." 
 
 That may, by the way, as it now strikes me, have 
 seemed a scarcely consistent statement. 
 
 But never mind ; I would not accept, I would not 
 touch the receipt and release which was offered to me. 
 I vowed I would not go out. Losing again all patience 
 as the puzzled old fellow stood there shrugging and 
 gesticulating, I made such a sudden run at him, that 
 beating a hasty retreat, and stumbling backwards over 
 his subordinates behind, they almost rolled over to- 
 gether in a heap against the opposite wall of the 
 passage. I slammed to the door of my cell upon 
 them, but unfortunately all the bolts and means of 
 fastening being on the wrong side, I was at last over- 
 powered by the united weight of the lot of them out- 
 side, and positively (would you believe me ?) having 
 called up farther assistance, it took the same four to 
 escort and carry me all the way downstairs, that it had
 
 288 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 before required to bring me up ; and having forced me 
 across the court to the gates, we had there a con- 
 siderable tussle before they succeeded in shoving me 
 bodily out, tossing, as they did, my rejected receipt 
 out after me.
 
 289 
 
 CHAPTER XXVIIl. 
 
 A MORNING CALL RETURNED. 
 
 Thus set free in spite of myself, and literally finding 
 myself with what, as the slang goes, is called the 
 " key of the street," that is, locked out everywhere, 
 and no place I could call my own to go to, my first 
 thought was to knock up Gorles, and so catching him 
 before he could make his escape from Dresden to have 
 it out with him without further delay. But when I 
 came to consider, I still did not know where he lived ; 
 his letter, which by-the-bye I had torn into a thousand 
 pieces in my wrath, had, I was sure, no address or 
 date to it. 
 
 Besides, as I certainly had in spite of myself 
 accepted the loan of his money, and though I did not 
 wish it, got out of limbo at his expense, there might 
 have been a little awkwardness in forcing a hostile 
 entry upon him that night, without having the where- 
 with about me at once to fling back at him, repudiat- 
 ing his alleged friendship and assistance, and then 
 
 VOL. I. u
 
 290 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 if I could have been free from all obligations, de- 
 nouncing bim for bis atrociously malicious designs 
 and diabolical macbinations against myself personally, 
 and my relations. 
 
 But bow could I, you see, not having a blessed 
 stiver? So I went to De Lyons' lodgings, and returned 
 the compliment of the previous night to his landlady 
 and himself, by knocking bim up, and making him 
 take me in. 
 
 I found my worthy friend " Taraxacum" tolerably 
 right again, and fairly recovering from his debauch, 
 and, having been in bed all day, declaring himself to 
 feel, as he really seemed, as fresh as a lark. 
 
 He would insist upon my occupying his own bed, 
 having no further need of it for himself; but if I would 
 only turn in and make myself comfortable, declared 
 that he meant to start for an early swim as soon as 
 it was light, which it would be in another half hour, 
 or thereabouts. 
 
 But I was in little humour for sleep, having my 
 adventures to relate and discuss with my friend, to 
 whom I gave a full and particular account of all, just 
 as I now have done to yourself; not, you maybe sure, 
 omitting the extent to which I felt aggrieved and 
 insulted by the way in which the hateful Goi'les 
 had forced his unlooked-for and most unwelcome
 
 A MORNING CALL RETURNED. 291 
 
 obligation upon me, and liow much I longed, yet 
 felt myself baffled in my longings, for some means of 
 punishing and revenging myself upon him. 
 
 "As to where he hangs out," De Lyons replied, 
 " I could take you there in a brace of shakes, as it is 
 in Moritz Strasse, not a stone's throw from round the 
 next corner ; but at this time of night, or rather to- 
 morrow morning as it is, we should not, I guess, have 
 much chance of gaining admittance without forcing 
 our way in upon him, which feat would probably 
 result in a re-introduction to your polizei friends. I 
 quite wondered they did not interfere with us last 
 night, considering the row that was needful under the 
 circumstances both at your own place, as well as 
 Liittichau Strasse ; but those sort of games, you may 
 take your oath, are not to be played two nights 
 running with impunity. 
 
 " But as you do not seem to care about bed, why not 
 sit up here through the next three hours, and be up 
 at the railway station in time for the train by which 
 he told you he was to be starting ? There you would be 
 sure to nail the little sinner." 
 
 I had despondently to remind my friend of my utter 
 inability to relieve myself of the odious debt, and 
 the scruples I could not help entertaining upon the 
 propriety of thrashing a fellow, as I felt he ought 
 
 u 2
 
 292 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 to be thrashed, until I was free from what I felt to be 
 the disgrace of being under such an obligation to him. 
 
 There was no chance, you see, of borrowing or get- 
 ting the money, in the meantime. I am sure I would 
 gladly have paid cent, per cent, for the hundred and 
 seventy odd thalers, if I could have only got them 
 anyhow before five o'clock. I should like to have 
 been able to have shied them at him in a rattling 
 shower of thaler pieces about his ears, or caught him 
 over the head or shoulders with a good heavy bag full 
 of them. 
 
 " Oh ! as to that, if you look upon them for that pur- 
 pose," Taraxacum cut in, " I think I might, perhaps, 
 muster ten or a dozen knobbly coins, with a few five- 
 franc pieces, or, at least, lead medals amongst them, 
 which, though perhaps not all of them of much use 
 as currency in these parts, would do well enough to 
 pelt him with. They might answer your purpose if 
 you could manage to pick them up and fling them 
 over and over again, as he cuts along, as he would be 
 sure to do. He might think there was the whole sum 
 there, after the opening volley or two ; besides, you see, 
 he would not have much time or, as I calculate, in- 
 clination either to stop to count them." 
 
 There was something in the suggestion ; still, on 
 the whole, we did not think that it would exactly do.
 
 A MORNING CALL RETURNED. 293 
 
 " And what is more, my dear fellow," De Lyons 
 added solemnly, " with the great, the very great power 
 which, as you yourself must be conscious, he certainly 
 has by some means or other acquired over you, there 
 is no saying whether he might not put a spoke in your 
 wheel, either by throwing you then and there into a 
 state of torpor, or so affecting your mind or memory 
 for the time being, that you should lose all control 
 over yourself, and not know what you were about, or 
 whether you were on your head or your heels. 
 
 " That power, the magnetic fluid, in fact, or odyle, 
 as it is technically called, strong as I know it must be, 
 by what I myself saw of the state you were in last 
 evening, may be increased to an almost inconceivable 
 intensity, by cultivation, and a concentration of voli- 
 tion on the part of Gorles, who thoroughly under- 
 stands his own powers, and what he is about in these 
 matters. 
 
 " It seems strange, when one compares the relative 
 strength and physical build of you two fellows as 
 individuals : but he must certainly at some time or 
 another have contrived to have established a strong 
 rapport between your and his own spiritual systems, 
 in which he must have gained a most wonderful pull 
 over you, and no mistake. 
 
 " That same pull may, to be sure, be counteracted
 
 294 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 by any one knowing, as I happened to do in your 
 case, exactly how the land lay, and so setting to work 
 as I did immediately, to undo the party thus acted 
 upon. But with most folks, who have no notion of even 
 the existence of such strange dodges, — and how few 
 there are who have, or even care to know anything about 
 the simplest outlines of these stunning scientific truths I 
 — there you might be, struck stupid and helpless as if 
 you were blind drunk, until the oclylic force, unless of 
 course it is renewed, has, so to speak, evaporated of 
 itself. 
 
 " Now, Gorles, I remember already telling you, has 
 from his very birth been naturally endowed with a 
 double extra allowance of the said magnetic power ; 
 and constantly cultivating and increasing that power 
 as he has all his life been doing, not even sticking at — 
 unless he is much belied — to ' buckle up ' to and avail 
 himself of the personal assistance, and the good will 
 
 of , a powerful Personage I have before alluded 
 
 to ; there is no knowing the depths to which he has 
 not fathomed, or how far, if his fancy or malice should 
 require it, he can not and would not willingly indulge 
 the abuse of the said tremendous secrets of nature 
 which he has thus mastered. 
 
 " The professor himself," De Lyons then went on
 
 A MORNING CALL RETURNED. 295 
 
 to tell me, " looked upon Gorles as quite an equal, if 
 not even almost his superior in magnetic power. 
 
 " There was not much love lost between the two, 
 though the former genius wished to keep on terms 
 with the little wretch, as requiring his assistance for 
 the great experiment with the spirit world, in prepara- 
 tion for which the learned man was mainly devoting 
 his whole study and attention, and so they kept up an 
 association, although there was a wide difference which 
 had at one time amounted to a quarrel between them, in 
 regard to the use and ultimate object of their scien- 
 tific investigations and rather questionable dabblings 
 in the black art. 
 
 " The professor, as his faithful disciple had before 
 declared, and I have since had every reason sincerely 
 to believe, was solely influenced by good and the most 
 genuine philanthropic motives, while Gorles, on the 
 contrary, only looked upon the mysterious secrets 
 which were in his keeping as means for securing his 
 own personal malicious, and even more atrocious ends." 
 
 Taraxacum had, on the former occasion when he 
 first opened upon this same subject to me, mentioned 
 with a warning the name of Katie De Lorme, in con- 
 nexion with a discussion which had arisen as to the 
 proper use or abuse of the powers they had acquired.
 
 29G MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 but he bad wandered off on another tack, and I, dis- 
 gusted at the very idea of having even her dear name 
 brought up among such a set of unscrupulous fellows, 
 had not cared to bring him back again to the unwel- 
 come subject. 
 
 But, curious to hear exactly how he had come pos- 
 sessed of that locket, as well as the whole particulars 
 of his extraordinary, though, as it had turned out, 
 entirely successful adventure of the previous night, I 
 let him run on without any interruption, and as far as 
 I could follow all the ups and downs of his story, it 
 was somehow to the following effect : —
 
 29: 
 
 CHAPTER XXIX. 
 
 ' ' There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, 
 Than are dreamt of in your philosophy." 
 
 Hamlet, act i. sc. 5 . 
 
 It is perhaps, you may not be aware, an established 
 fact in the science of mesmerism or magnetism, -which- 
 ever you choose to call it, that is, according to De 
 Lyons, whom you must bear in mind to be himself 
 a firm believer in all these matters, that as soon as, or 
 even within a considerable time after the proper state 
 of rapport has been established between the mag- 
 netizer and any other person, although separated by 
 any amount of space, even though they may be in 
 different and distant countries from one another, the 
 influence and magnetic power may still be kept going 
 and continue active between the two thus spiritually 
 connected, by the operator having in his possession 
 anything which has belonged to or come immediately 
 from the other, whom you may call the patient. 
 
 As, for instance, a lock of hair, or sometimes a phial 
 of blood, or even some such simple object as a trinket, 
 a glove, or a slipper, has been found by experiments
 
 29S MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 to answer the purpose. One individual may thus 
 actually obtain a complete knowledge of all that 
 others with whom he is in relation are not only doing 
 but even thinking, or almost going to do or think at a 
 future time ; nay, more, can even exercise a control 
 and direction over those thoughts and acts, and that, 
 as I said, without the slightest reference to distance 
 greater or less. Thus much, I say, seemed to be no 
 more than an old and well-known truth confirmed by 
 many instances, but, as De Lyons went on to inform 
 me, according to more recent discoveries and experi- 
 ments in their most wonderful, not to say most danger- 
 ous powers, the science had progressed, and at last 
 been brought to such an awful pitch, that by the sole 
 exereise of an intense volition on the part of some 
 of the more advanced and enthusiastic performers, 
 patients had been thrown into a state of coma and 
 deep trance ; and while thus rendered to all external 
 appearance quite lifeless, their souls or spirits had 
 been separated from their bodies, and actually caused 
 to appear visiblj-, though De Lyons believed not 
 tangibly, in the presence of those, by the strength of 
 whose irresistible will they had been summoned. 
 
 "Stuff!" I said, "nothing should ever make me 
 believe anything half so impossible or incredible." 
 
 " That you should have thought and said so forty-
 
 MORE THINGS THAN ARE DREAMT OF. 299 
 
 eight hours ago, I should not have heen surprised," 
 De Lyons remarked very quietly ; " hut after what you 
 have yourself experienced, and witnessing as you did 
 the state your own cousin was in, you are a one-er 
 to convince that there are — as Shakspeare, isn't it, 
 says ? — ' more rum things in this queer world than ever 
 were dreamt of in your philosophy,' and no mistake. 
 Still, without meaning to convey anything uncivil, the 
 fact of your not heing able to believe, does not make 
 them less true as physical facts, you know." So he 
 went on with his strange story. 
 
 It was to this particular branch o? diablerie, for 
 I can call it no less, that Gorles, it seems, had been 
 devoting his whole time and energies, just about the 
 time that he was so very intimate with the De Lormes ; 
 and having, according to De Lyons, from the very 
 first day he had ever seen poor Katie, done her the 
 honour of fixing upon her as the object of his infernal 
 little afiections ; and also very soon finding her to be 
 naturally a highly sensitive and predisposed subject, 
 too delighted at the prospect of gaining a complete 
 and easy influence over her, he had set deliberately to 
 work to put in practice upon her the fearful powers 
 which he was cultivating, and felt increasing within 
 himself. 
 
 Professor Zauber, and all the others of the cUque,
 
 300 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 even I believe the Frenchman, had, with proper good 
 feehng, entirely refused to have anything to do with, 
 or at all countenance the little wretch's proposals, 
 which actually went the length of wishing to cause 
 that young girl to appear in spirit in spite of herself 
 at one of their usual evening meetings, and having 
 thus gained absolute power over her soul, and — Heaven 
 help me when I think of it ! — I believe, fiend incarnate 
 as he is, he even dared to hint, having thus got her 
 reputation at his mercy, his unparalleled scheme was to 
 allow her body to be buried as dead, which by the law 
 of that country must be within twenty-four hours after 
 death, and by stealth or bribery recovering her body 
 from the cemetery, and so restoring her soul and spirit 
 of life to her, she would belong entirely to him, and 
 owe her very existence to his powers. 
 
 Whether this scheme, utterly wild and impossible 
 as of course it seems, were feasible or not, matters not 
 in judging of the atrocious infamy of him who himself 
 entirely believed in its being so, while concerting and 
 doing his best to induce others to aid him in carrying 
 it out. 
 
 Taraxacum also thoroughly believed in its possi- 
 bility, I am sure, and indeed declared that the very 
 same thing had been tried not long before by one of 
 the principal disciples of the famous Baron von
 
 MORE THINGS THAN ARE DREAMT OF. 301 
 
 Eeichenbach, and successfully, upon a lady who, being 
 supposed to be really dead, had been buried and 
 rescued from her very grave in the manner described ; 
 and whom now they say he has in his power, living 
 nominally as his wife, but in the most abject state of 
 mental, moral, and physical subjection to her resusci- 
 tator's will, serving him in the capacity of clairvoyante, 
 adviser, and oracle, as well as being the perpetual vic- 
 tim of all his phenomena and scientific experiments. 
 
 " It was to this very individual, that when refused 
 and scouted by his usual associates Gorles had gone 
 down for assistance and further instruction to Vienna ; 
 and I knew precious well," continued De Lyons, to go 
 on with the story in his own words, " what he had been 
 after; though when he turned up again here at Dresden 
 he kept as much as he could out of our way, and when 
 that wouldn't do, was quite mum upon the subject, as 
 if he had entirely given up or forgotten the very idea. 
 But I was not going to be humbugged quite so easy 
 as all that, and made up my mind to thwart him, as 
 you know I succeeded in doing. 
 
 " Don't you remember my warning you some days 
 ago ? but as you seemed to be inclined to cut up rather 
 rough on the subject, and some other matter turning 
 up, I said no more. 
 
 *' I never dreamt of his having the power he evi-
 
 302 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 dently can exercise over yourself; however and -when- 
 ever he can have managed to acquire it." 
 
 It was then I told De Lyons of my own old Eton 
 adventure with Gorles, of which I have already given 
 you an account. 
 
 " Oh, thus and thus is the milk in the cocoa-nut 
 fully accounted for," was his allegorical reply, " which 
 I must confess had, until you now tell me all this, 
 heen a very hard nut to crack, and had puzzled me 
 not a little to conceive how on earth, looking at your 
 relative strengths and proportions, the pigmy had con- 
 trived to circumvent the giant, as he evidently had, as 
 far as spiritual powers were concerned ; hut now I 
 understand it all plainly enough. 
 
 " So that knotty poiut heing settled, let me go on. 
 
 " Our little friend I am sure had not intended that I, 
 or any of us should even know of his return from 
 Vienna, but I chanced to come across him by accident 
 the very evening of his arrival. 
 
 " It was, hy-the-bye, on my way home from your 
 own door that very evening on which, as you may 
 remember, I met you coming out of the house in 
 Lilttichau Strasse, and first learned from you your 
 relationship with the fair young lady in question. 
 
 " For the sake of something to say, and having you 
 fresh in my mind, I suppose, I mentioned your name,
 
 MORE THINGS THAN ARE DREAMT OF. 303 
 
 reminding him that yon had both been at the same 
 house at Eton, and telling him of the fact of your 
 having come to make some stay in Dresden. He at 
 tirst stuck to it that he knew nothing about you, and 
 remembered no such name ; but, as the saying is, 
 liars should have patent memories, for almost di- 
 rectly afterwards, upon my going on to remark casually 
 that I had just seen you, and to advise him in a 
 friendly way to mind his eye, if he was still thinking 
 of trying on any of his little games with that inte- 
 resting young gentleman Ferdy or his pretty sister, I 
 noted a peculiarly nasty twinkle of malice in his queer 
 little eyes, as he wagged his head, saying that he knew 
 nothing and cared less about either the young lady or 
 yourself; but that if you fancied you were to get 
 her all to yourself, that you were very much mis- 
 taken ; and that no doubt sentimental walks to the 
 Wolfshligel and such places might be very pleasant, 
 but that you might take your oaths that you would 
 never be out together, or have any more of your 
 ([elighiivXUtes-a-Utes again for the rest of your lives. 
 "It struck me that was not so bad, considering that 
 he had, within barely live minutes before, utterly dis- 
 claimed all knowledge or remembrance of you, but 
 I was puzzled to make out how the deuce the little 
 toad could have known so well where you had been
 
 304 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 and what you had been doing; as I was sure that 
 he had only just turned up again in this city. Of 
 course, if I had been up to all as I am now, of his 
 having those articles in his possession, it would have 
 been all plain enough, your walks to the Wolfshilgel 
 or anything else. He is an awful artful dodger, I 
 know ; but even he has not yet, I believe, arrived at 
 the power of being in two places at once, though 
 even that I should be sorry to take upon myself to 
 pronounce to be impossible, as I have no doubt there 
 is a way, if one could only hit upon the secret. 
 
 " Well, in consequence of my conversation with 
 you, for your sake, and, pardon me for venturing to 
 add respectfully, for that of the young lady herself, I 
 determined to keep my eye upon our interesting but 
 dwarfish philosopher. 
 
 " I had a conviction that he had not abandoned his 
 long-cherished scheme, and patiently I watched his 
 goings out and comings in, until, having i-eason to 
 think that the long-expected moment for the great 
 experiment was at hand, I that evening contrived, 
 never mind how, to gain admittance to his private 
 diggings, while he was gone out, and hid myself in a 
 huge old-fashioned closet, or rather wardrobe, which 
 forms part of the furniture of his room, quite big 
 enough to take me in comfortably, and through the
 
 MORE THINGS THAN ARE DREAMT OF. 305 
 
 gaping chinks of whose carved panels I could see well 
 enough all that was going on in the room. 
 
 " Gorles and his lately enlisted friend and ally, 
 whom he had brought back with him from Vienna, 
 came in very shortly quite unsuspicious, and, locking 
 themselves in, set to work at their grossly misapplied 
 scientific operations. 
 
 " Having, as you know, been a good deal mixed up 
 in that sort of business myself, I of course understood, 
 and was not so much excited by curiosity as probably 
 you, or any one else who were not accustomed to the 
 kind of thing, might have been ; but I kept my wits 
 sharp about me, though for a long time their prelimi- 
 naries were dull and commonplace enough : Pliiffer, 
 which was, as far as I could make out, the colleague's 
 name, constantly consulting a ragged old manuscript, 
 as black nearly as my hat with age and dust, as well 
 as a large note-book he held in his hand, keptprompting 
 and instructing Gorles in their proceedings, and from 
 time to time repeating sentences of an incantation, 
 which, though I had some notion of their nature from 
 having heard them so frequently discussed, made 
 even me open my eyes a trifle. I don't care to go 
 into particulars, but, though much was entirely new 
 to me, I knew, as I have said, perfectly well what they 
 were about and preparing to go through with. 
 
 VOL. I. X
 
 306 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 " Between them, on a sort of tripod, was a curiously 
 fashioned old concern like a chafing-pot, or rather dish, 
 with a lamp under it, in which, though I could not from 
 my hiding-place at the time exactly make out what it 
 was, that gold trinket had been immersed in some 
 strong chemical stuff, which was burning and threw up 
 a pale blue flame. For five days I overheard one of 
 them mention, as he stirred it, it had been thus 
 soaking. 
 
 " They had for some time continued their operations 
 and low mumbled repetitions, when, all of a sudden, 
 Gorles, who now he was in for it seemed thoroughly 
 frightened at the undertaking (for his face was as 
 pale as ashes, and he was visibly shaking all over), 
 caught his accomplice by the arm, and pointing to the 
 other side of the room, stammered out in a whisper, 
 ' It works, it works ! She is here ! Don't you see 
 her r 
 
 " The other fellow, who was as cool as possible the 
 whole time, looked across and bowed courteously, but 
 distantly, just as he would have done to any one 
 whom he did not know, or with whom he had only a 
 very slight acquaintance; and then, turning to the 
 crystal dish, fished out its contents with the hook or 
 some such instrument with which he had previously 
 been stirring up the flame, and putting it, all wet as
 
 MORE THINGS THAN ARE DREAMT OF. 307 
 
 it was, on the edge of the table in front of him, began 
 diligently making rapid magnetic passes all over and 
 around it. 
 
 " Now, not being myself in a state of rap'port with 
 either of the parties, though, of course, I was staring 
 with all my might in the direction as indicated by 
 little Gorles, I could not myself see anybody or form 
 whatsoever, though I was sure by their manner and 
 words that they both had the power of doing so ; but 
 I felt quite certain that the spirit of — you may guess 
 who — having left her body, was then present in that 
 very room. 
 
 "I could see nothing, I say, but I could distinctly 
 hear a clear, low voice, as of a young girl, just like 
 the tone of a very softly-stirred silver bell, at some 
 tremendous distance, say across the sea. 
 
 " I do not mean to say that there was any actual 
 sound striking upon the drums of my ears in the 
 ordinary way of nature — it was more, perhaps, like the 
 sensation of when one sometimes hears one's own 
 name called in a familiar voice, and turns round to 
 find nobody near ; or have you never had some par- 
 ticular sentence, or, more commonly, an air of music 
 repeated as if close to one's ears ? 
 
 " The voice, though gentle as could be when I first 
 became conscious of it, was reproaching Gorles — 
 
 x2
 
 308 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 upbraiding him for cruelty — and then seemed to 
 change to entreaties, begging him to have pity, and 
 not to exercise his fearful powers over her. 
 
 " Gorles, backed up as he seemed to be by the 
 other's perfectly collected demeanour, and having 
 somewhat recovered his usual audacitv of manner, was 
 speaking in a low tone, as if trying to coax and 
 assure her ; but as he went on, finding his soft tones 
 of persuasion unappreciated, the little beast, growing 
 more familiar, and, as I could see, egged on by the 
 presence and, indeed, winks and nods of the other 
 Devil, worse than himself, began to mock at her 
 prayers and entreaties, and even to tell her that he 
 now held her, as he had the atrocity to say, abso- 
 lutely in his power. 
 
 " I fancy, though I was not quite sure at the time, 
 that the voice uttered your own name, crying bitterly, 
 as it then seemed to be, either begging for you or 
 threatening your resentment and vengeance for their 
 iniquitous treatment of her. The stranger looked 
 inquiringly across at Gorles. 
 
 " ' Oh ! we can soon settle him,' he said, with a gnash 
 of his teeth, as if he would like to have bitten you ; 
 ' wherever he may just at this moment happen to 
 be ;' and taking up that old kid-glove from the 
 mantle-piece — you must have dropped it some-
 
 MORE THINGS THAN ARE DREAMT OF. 309 
 
 where, or could that little whipper-snapper of a school- 
 boy, Ferdy, have got it secretly for him ? 
 
 " Anyhow,hetook it; and having first breathed heavily 
 upon it proceeded to make several careful magnetic 
 passes over it — that, of course, must have been at 
 exactly the very time at which you describe yourself 
 as so singularly overcome on your way home from 
 Liittichau Strasse. 
 
 "'Now then,' said Gorles, again turning to his 
 victim, ' unless you swear to renounce all thoughts of 
 that fellow it will be the worse for ' 
 
 " I heard, or rather was conscious of the voice, cry- 
 ing out in the most violent distress, but still as if at 
 the same distance from us. 
 
 " I could just stand it no longer, but with a sudden 
 shout which made even Herr PliiflFer jump round as if 
 he had been shot, I burst in upon them from my hid- 
 ing-place, made a grab at the glove with one hand 
 and the trinket with the other, which in my swoop I 
 knocked under the table: crash went over the simmering 
 chafing-dish, making an awful smash as it and the lamp 
 together came to grief in the struggle which ensued. 
 
 Profiting by the light of the flaming stream 
 which was running along upon the ground, Gorles 
 made a dash down after the locket, and was making 
 off with it to the door, but having had to unlock
 
 310 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 it, I was round, and close after him as he rushed 
 up some stairs which were just outside. I caught fast 
 hold of the little beggar by the leg and pulkd him 
 downstairs again with a jerk enough to have dislo- 
 cated his limb for life, and rolling him right over 
 wrenched the locket from between his fingers, but not 
 before it was quite broken and strained in the scuffle ; 
 I fancy myself he was trying to extricate the hair 
 from it as he rushed along. He bit and spit at me 
 with furious rage, for all the world like a mad cat ; 
 but as long as I had got what I wanted I did not care. 
 Now, although I understood and had witnessed 
 enough of their proceedings to feel sure that I had 
 spoilt their game, I had not sufficient confidence in 
 myself to know exactly how to act, or what steps 
 would be necessary to counteract and stop the serious 
 mischief and dreadful eflects of the rascal's misdoings. 
 What became of the confederate, by-the-way, in the 
 tussle I do not know. 
 
 " Finding my] way down into the open street below 
 with the spoils of victory safe in my possession, I 
 luckily bethought me of my dear friend, the Professor, 
 and went straight off to him for his advice and directions 
 in the matter ; he was, of course, the man of all others 
 to tell me what to do, if I could only find him ; but 
 that was no very easy matter.
 
 MORE THINGS THAN ARE DREAMT OF. 311 
 
 " It must have been a couple of hours or so before I 
 run him down in one of his less accustomed haunts, 
 and had told him my business. 
 
 " Though expressing the greatest disgust and indig- 
 nation at Gorles's conduct in regard to an innocent 
 and helpless young lady, I could see that in spite of 
 those better feelings he immediately took the most 
 immense interest in the result of the experiment, for 
 he made me repeat all over again most minutely every 
 detail and particular of all I had seen and observed ; 
 and as I told him all as closely and accurately as I 
 could, his queer eyes quite glistened and flashed 
 through the glasses of his spectacles with excitement. 
 
 " Having at last heard and digested all I had to tell 
 him, upon my again urgently pressing him for advice 
 in the matter, for the young lady's sake, he desired 
 me to lose no time in finding you out, and procuring 
 your special assistance for the recovery of your fair 
 cousin, as, judging from all I had told him (we had 
 talked you and your affairs over amongst ourselves at 
 other times, if you must know), there ^would probably 
 exist a more active sympathetic rapport between her 
 and yourself — next, of course, to the evil-working in- 
 fluences of Gorles — than witli any one else in the world. 
 
 " He moreover not a little staggered me by, after 
 keeping me certainly upwards of an hour thus dis-
 
 312 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 cussing the subject, impressing upon me that there 
 was no time to he lost ; for though he knew that the 
 same phenomenon had been on other occasions suc- 
 cessfully carried out, when the spirits of patients 
 thrown into a magnetic slumber had been caused to 
 leave their bodies, and to return again even after the 
 lapse of some days, yet in more than one recorded 
 instance, it had unfortunately happened, that not hav- 
 ing been separated even more than six or eight hours, 
 mortification had commenced before the renewal of 
 the electric principle of life^thus artificially suspended ; 
 and that the spirit, as if unable or unwilling to resume 
 its functions in a frame on which decay had set in, 
 had, as it were, evaporated, and thus actual death had 
 been the result." 
 
 With this piece of information from his scientific 
 friend, it is not much wonder that De Lyons ex- 
 perienced, as he declared to me, a feeling of intense 
 anxiety, and did his very best to get me up and to 
 the rescue in time. After his first unsuccessful attempt 
 upon my rooms, he described himself as at his wit's 
 end to know what to be at ; he felt that it would be 
 useless and hopeless for him to attempt by any means, 
 fair or foul, to gain admission to the supposed death- 
 chamber of poor Katie ; for that there was no chance 
 of their even listening to his wild story.
 
 MORE THINGS THAN ARE DREAMT OF. S13 
 
 I was not a little touched at the joy and real un- 
 selfish satisfaction evinced by the worthy fellow, pro- 
 portionate as it was to the anxieties he had gone 
 through at the eventual success and reward of all his 
 troubles, after having acted implicitly in obedience to 
 the directions of his friend, the Professor. 
 
 And so, after a considerable pause for reflection, 
 when he had thus brought his story to an end. Taraxa- 
 cum added, " You say that Gorles is off again by this 
 morning's train, and, I suppose, his worthy familiar 
 with him ? I wonder whether he is aware of the De 
 Lormes' sudden departure which you tell me of ?" 
 
 "He cannot, think you,,be following them with any 
 intention of again trying on any of his tricks in 
 that quarter?" I exclaimed, almost involuntarily, as 
 a disagreeable thought just flashed through my mind, 
 
 " More likely," replied De Lyons, " to get clear out 
 of your way, as he must guess that I should tell you all, 
 and naturally would be on the look out for your heavy 
 resentment. I certainly give him no small credit for 
 his deep cunning in jumping at the chance as he has 
 done, of paying that money to get you out of limbo, 
 and thus, just as, of course, he must have had the wit 
 to foresee, effectually putting a stopper upon any 
 violent measures which you may have conceived against 
 him, but which you could hardly in common decency
 
 314 MELCHIOR GORLES. 
 
 carry out as long as you are under pecuniary obligations 
 to him. 
 
 " Now, a commonplace, every-clay fellow, under the 
 same circumstances, would have thought himself safe 
 and all right in leaving you where you were, without 
 reflecting that you would have been sure to have re- 
 gained your liberty in the morning, and have had 
 plenty of time, and no moral impediment, such as you 
 now labour under, of following him up and smashing 
 him into small pieces the same afternoon. To give the 
 little Devil only his due, he is a proper deep one : it 
 was a first-rate card, and a thoroughly good finesse, 
 playing it just as he has done. 
 
 " However, by this time he is clear off and away, for 
 I declare there is six o'clock striking, and it is such a 
 glorious bright morning that I shall go out, and I 
 advise you to come with me, instead of going to bed, 
 for which you do not seem much more inclined than 
 myself, and a jolly good swim will do us both all the 
 good in the world." 
 
 END OF VOL. I.
 
 LONBOIf ! 
 
 SAVILIi AND EDWAEDS, PKINTEES, CHANDOS STEEET 
 
 COVENT GAEDEW.
 
 :l 
 
 1 
 
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