Mia 1 5^ ^, \^\ '^r. '^i Return this book on or before the Latest Date stamped below. Theft, mutilation, and underlining of books are reasons for disciplinary action and may result in dismissal from the University. University of Illinois Library IJOt) JUL OS ^395 THE ADVENTUKES HAJJI BAB A, OP ISPAHAN. IN THREE VOLUMES. VOL. I. LONDON : JOHN MURRAY, ALBEMARLE-STREET. 1824. l! Digitized by the Internet Archive in 2009 with funding from University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign http://www.archive.org/details/adventuresofhajj01mori i X GENERAL CONTENTS. VOLUME T. CHAPTER I, Of Hajji Baba's birth and education - Page 1 CHAPTER II. Hajji Baba commences his travels — His encounter with the Turcomans, and his captivity - 8 CHAPTER III. Into what hands Hajji Baba falls, and the fortune which his razors proved to him - - 22 CHAPTER IV. Of his ingenuity in rescuing his master's money from the Turcoman, and of his determination to keep it - - - - . 30 VOL. I. b VI GENERAL CONTENTS. CHAPTER V. Haj ji Baba invades his native city, and becomes a robber in his own defence - Page '^9 CHAPTER VI. Concerning the three prisoners taken by the Tur- comans, and of the booty made in the caravan- serai - - - - _ 55 CHAPTER VII. Hajji Baba evinces a feeling disposition — History of the poet Asker _ _ _ ^5 CHAPTER VIII. Hajji Baba escapes from the Turcomans. The meaning of ' faUing from the frying-pan into the fire' illustrated - - - 76 CHAPTER IX. Hajji Baba, in his distress, becomes a saka, or water- carrier - - - _ - 90 CHAPTER X. He makes a soliloquy, and becomes an itinerant vender of smoke - - - - 99 GENERAL CONTENTS. VU CHAPTER XI. History of Dervish Sefer, and of the two other dervishes - - - - Page 107 CHAPTER XII. Haj ji Baba finds that fraud does not remain un- punished, even in this world — He makes fresh plans _ - - - _ iMi CHAPTER XIII. Hajji Baba leaves Meshed, is cured of his sprain, and relates a story _ - - 145 CHAPTER XIV. Of the man he meets, and of the consequences of the encounter _ - _ - 159 CHAPTER XV. Hajji Baba reaches Tehran, and goes to the poet's house - - - - - - 169 CHAPTER XVI. He makes plans for the future, and is involved in a quarrel - - - _ - 175 b2 Vlll GENERAL CONTENTS. CHAPTER XVII. He puts on new clothes, goes to the bath, and ap- pears in a new character - - Page 18:^ CHAPTER XVIII. The poet returns from captivity. The conse- quences of it for Hajji Baha - - 191 CHAPTER XIX. Hajji Baba gets into the service of the king's phy- sician. Of the manner he was first employed by him 200 CHAPTER XX. He succeeds in deceiving two of the faculty, getting a pill from one, and a piece of gold from the other - - - - - 211 CHAPTER XXI. He describes the manner in which the Shah of Persia takes medicine - - - 222 CHAPTER XXII. Hajji Baba asks the doctor for a salary, and of the success of his demand - - - 233 GENERAL CONTENTS. ix CHAPTER XXIII, He becomes dissatisfied with his situation, is idle, and falls in love - . - Page 240 CHAPTER XXIV. He has an interview with the fair Zeenab, who relates how she passes her time in the doctor's harem - - - - _ 248 CHAPTER XXV. The lovers meet again, and are very happy. Hajji Baba sings - - - - 261 GENERAL CONTENTS. VOLUME II. CHAPTER I. The history of Zeenab^ the Cnrdish slave Page 1 CHAPTER II. Of the preparations made by the chief physician to receive the Shah as his guest, and of the great expense which threatened him - - 43 CHAPTER III. Concerning the manner of the Shah's reception : of the present made him, and the conversation which ensued - - - - - 54 CHAPTER IV. A description of the entertainment, which is fol- lowed by an event destructive to Hajji Baba's happiness - - - - - 71 GENERAL CONTENTS. XI CHAPTER V. Hajji Baba meets Avith a rival in the Shah himself, and loses the fair object of his affections Page 82 CHAPTER VI. ^His reflections on the loss of Zeenab. He is sud- denly called upon to exert his skill as a doctor 90 CHAPTER VII. Hajji is appointed to a situation under government; he becomes an executioner - - - 100 CHAPTER VIII. He accompanies the Shah to his camp, and gets some insight into his profession - - 115 CHAPTER IX. Employed in his official capacity, Hajji Baba gives a specimen of Persian despotism - - 129 CHAPTER X. Fortune, which pretended to frown, in fact smiles upon Hajji Baba, and promotes him to be sub- lieutenant to the chief executioner - - ]^0 Xll GENERAL CONTENTS. CHAPTER XI. Although by trade an executioner, he shows a feel- ing heart. He meets with a young man and woman in distress - - Page 157 CHAPTER XII. The history of Yusuf, the Armenian, and his wife Mariam - - - - - 169 CHAPTER XIII. Sequel of the foregoing history, and of the resolu- tion which Hajji Baba takes in consequence 231 CHAPTER XIV. The Armenian Yusuf proves himself worthy of Hajji Baba's confidence - - - 239 CHAPTER XV. Hajji Baba gives an account of his proceedings to his superiors, and shows himself a friend to the distressed - - - - - 247 CHAPTER XVI. He describes an expedition against the Russians, and does ample justice to the cowardice of his chief - - - - - 266 GENERAL CONTENTS. Xlll CHAPTER XVII. He proceeds to the king's camp, and gives a spe- cimen of lying on a grand scale - Page 278 CHAPTER XVIII. He relates a horrid tale, the consequences of which plunge him in the greatest misery - - 285 CHAPTER XIX. Hajji Baba meets with an old friend,, who cheers him up, gives him good advice, and secures him from danger - - _ _ 305 CHAPTER XX. He takes refuge in a sanctuary, where his melan- choly thoughts are diverted by a curious story 322 CHAPTER XXI. He becomes a saint, and associates with the most celebrated divine in Persia - - 374 CHAPTER XXII. Hajji Baba is robbed by his friend, and left utterly destitute ; but is released from his confinement 389 XIV GENERAL CONTENTS. VOLUME III. CHAPTER I. Haj ji Baba reaches Ispahan, and his paternal roof, just time enough to closa the eyes of his dying father _ _ - _ Page 1 CHAPTER II. He becomes heir to property which is not to be found, and his suspicions thereupon - 21 CHAPTER IV. Showing the steps he takes to discover his property, and who the diviner, Teez Negah, was 36 CHAPTER V. Of the diviner's success in making discoveries, and of the resolution which Hajji Baba takes in con- sequence - - - - - 48 GENERAL CONTENTS. XV CHAPTER VI. Haj ji Baba quits his mother, and becomes the scribe to a celebrated man of the law - Page 60 CHAPTEll VII. The raoUah Nadan gives an account of his new scheme for raising money, and for making men happy - - - - _ 71 CHAPTER VIII. Haj ji Baba becomes a promoter of matrimony, and of the register he keeps - - - 81 CHAPTER IX. Of the man Haj ji Baba meets, thinking him dead, and of the marriage which he brings about 90 CHAPTER X. Showing how the ambition of the mollah Nadan involves both him and his disciple in ruin 103 CHAPTER XI. Hajji Baba meets with an extraordinary adventure in the bath, which miraculously saves him from the horrors of despair - - - 115 XVI GENERAL CONTENTS. CHAPTER XII. Of the consequences of the adventure/ which threaten danger^ hut end in apparent good fortune < Page 126 CHAPTER XIII. Haj ji Baba does not shine in honesty. The Hfe and adventures of the moUah Nadan - 137 CHAPTER XIV. Hajji and the mollah make plans suited to their critical situation, showing that no confidence can exist between rogues - - - 163 CHAPTER XV. The punishment due to Hajji Baba falls upon Nadan, which makes the former a stanch pre- destinarian - - - - 175 CHAPTER XVI. Hajji Baba hears an extraordinary sequel to his adventure in the bath, and feels all the alarms of guilt - - - - - 183 GENERAL CONTENTS. XVll CHAPTER XYII. He is discovered and seized, but his good stars again befriend and set him free - Page l'J7 CHAPTER XVIII. He reaches Bagdad, meets his first master, and turns his views to commerce - - 20(5 CHAPTER XIX. He purchases pipe-sticks, and inspires a hopeless passion in the breast of his old master's daughter 217 CHAPTER XX. He becomes a merchant, leaves Bagdad, and ac- companies a caravan to Constantinople 226" CHAPTER XXI. Haj ji Baba makes a conquest of the widow of an Emir, which at first alarms, but afterwards elates him - - _ - 235 CHAPTER XXII. He obtains an interview with the fair Shekerleb, makes a settlement upon her, and becomes her husband - - - - - 249 XVlll GENERAL CONTENTS. CHAPTER XXIII. From a vender of pipe-sticks he becomes a rich Aga, but feels all the inconvenience of supporting a false character - - _ Page 261 CHAPTER XXIV. His desire to excite envy lays the foundation of his disgrace. He quarrels with his wife - 2fi'J CHAPTER XXV. He is discovered to be an impostor^ loses his wife, and the wide world is again before him 278 CHAPTER XXVI. An incident in the street diverts his despair ; he seeks consolation in the advice of old Osman 2b9 CHAPTER XXVII. In endeavouring to gain satisfaction from his ene- mies he acquires a friend. Some account of ^lirza Fircuz - - _ . 298 CHAPTER XXVIII. He becomes useful to an ambassador, who makes him a partaker of his confidence - - 307 GENERAL CONTENTS. XIX CHAPTEIl XXIX. Of his first essays in public life, and of the use he was of to his employer - - Page 318 CHAPTER XXX. Hajji Baba writes the History of Europe, and with his ambassador returns to Persia - - 334 CHAPTER XXXI. The ceremony of receiving a Frank ambassador at the court of the Shah is described - 3 i7 CHAPTER XXXII. Hajji is noticed by the grand vizier, and is the means of gratifying that minister's favourite passion - - - - - 357 CHAPTER XXXIII. Of the manner in which he turned his influence to use, and how he was again noticed by the vizier 3G7 CHAPTER XXXIV. The conclusion. Misfortune seems to take leave of Hajji Baba, who returns to his native city a greater man than w^hen he firet left it - 376 INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE, TO THE REV. DR. FUNDGRUBEN, tltuphuH to the S-u'cdish Embassy at the Ottoman Porte. ESTEEMED AND LEARNED SIR, You will be astonished to see yourself addressed by one, of whose existence you are perhaps ignorant, and whose name has doubtless long since been erased from your memory. But when I put you in mind of an VOL. I. c XXll INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. English traveller, who (forgive my precision) sixteen years ago was fre- quently admitted to enjoy the pleasure of your conversation, and who was even honoured with a peculiar share of your attention, perhaps then you may indulgently recollect him, and patiently submit to peruse the follow- ing volumes, to which he now takes the liberty of prefixing your name. At the time to which I allude, your precious hours were employed in searching into the very depths of hieroglyphic lore, and you were then almost entirely taken up in putting together the fruits of those your re- INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. XXIU searches, which have since appeared, and astonished the world in that very luminous work entitled ' The Bio- graphy of celebrated Mummies.' I have frequently since reflected upon the debt of gratitude which you im- posed by allowing me to engross so much of your time, and that upon matters of comparatively trivial im- portance, when your mind must have been so much engaged upon those grave and weighty subjects, which you have treated with such vast learning, clearness, and perspicuity in your above-mentioned treatise. In particular I have ever borne in mind a conversation, when one beautiful c2 XXIV INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. moonlight niglit, reclining upon a sofa of the Swedish palace, and look- ing out of those windows which com- mand so magnificent and extensive a view of the city and harbour of Con- stantinople, we discussed subjects which had reference to the life and manners of the extraordinary people its inhabitants. Excuse me for reporting back your own words ; but as the subject in- terested me much, I recollect well the observation you made, that no tra- veller had ever satisfied you in -his delineation of Asiatic manners ; ' for,' said you, ' in general their mode of INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. XXV treating the subject is by sweeping assertions, which leave no precise image on the mind, or by disjointed and insulated facts, which for the most part are only of consequence as they relate to the individual traveller him- self.' We were both agreed, that of all the books which have ever been published on the subject, the Arabian Nights' Entertainments give the truest picture of the Orientals, and that, for the best of all reasons, because it is the work of one of their own com- munity. ' But,' said you, ' notwith- standing they have been put into a European dress, weeded of their nu- merous repetitions, and brought as XXvi INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. near to the level of our ideas as can be, still few would be likely to understand them thoroughly who have not lived some time in the East, and who have not had frequent oppor- tunities of associating with its in- habitants. For,' you added, opening a volume of that work at the same time, ' to make a random observation upon the first instance which occurs, here in the history of the three Ca- lendars, I see that Anima, after having requested the porter whom she had met to follow her with his basket, stopped at a closed door, and having rapped, a Christian with a long white beard opened it, into whose hand she INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. XXVII put ^ome money without saying a single word. But the Christian, who knew what she wanted, went in again, and a little while after returned, bring- ing a large pitcher full of excellent wine.' You observed, * that although we who lived in Turkey might know that wine was in most cities prohibited to be sold openly, and that if it was to be found it would be in the house of a Christian, many of whom disposed of it in a mysterious manner to the Mo- hamedans, yet that circumstance would not immediately occur to the mere European reader, who perhaps would expect something to be forthcoming XXVUl INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. in the future narrative, from what is in fact only a trait of common life.' I then suggested, that perhaps if a European would give a correct idea of oriental manners, which would com- prehend an account of the vicissitudes attendant upon the life of an Eastern, of his feelings about his government, of his conduct in domestic life, of his hopes and plans of advancement, of his rivalities and jealousies, in short, of every thing that is connected both with the operations of the mind and those of the body, perhaps his best method would be to collect so many facts and INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. XXIX anecdotes of actual life; as would illus- trate the different stations and ranks which compose a Musulman com- munity, and then work them into one connected narrative, upon the plan of that excellent picture of European life, Gil Bias of Le Sage. To this you were pleased to object, be- cause you deemed it almost impossible that a European, even supposing him to have rejected his own faith and adopted the Mohamedan, as in the case of Monsieur de Bonneval, who rose to high rank in the Turkish go- vernment, and of Messrs. C and B , in more modern times, (the XXX INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. former a ToikIiI Bashi, or general of artillery, the latter an attendant upon the CapitanPasha) could ever so exactly seize those nice shades and distinctions ofpurpose, in action and manner, which a pure Asiatic only could. To sup- port your argument, you illustrated it by observing, that neither education, time, nor talent, could ever give to a foreigner, in any given country, so complete a possession of its language as to make him pass for a native ; and that, do what he would, some defect in idiom, or even some too great precision in grammar, w^ould detect him. But, said you, if a native Oriental could ever be brought to understand INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. XXXI SO much of the taste of Europeans, in investigations of this nature, as to write a full and detailed history of his own Hfe, beginning with his earliest education, and going through to its decline, we might then stand a chance of acquiring the desired knowledge. This conversation, reverend sir, has remained treasured up in my mind ; for having lived much in Eastern countries, I never lost sight of the pos- sibility of either falling in with a native who might have written his own adven- tures, or of forming such an intimacy with one, as might induce him faith- fully to recite them, and thus afford XXXll INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. materials for the work which my ima- gination had fondly conceived might be usefully put together. I have always held in respect most of the customs and habits of the Orientals, many of which, to the generality of Europeans, appear so ridiculous and disgusting, because I have ever con- ceived them to be copies of ancient originals. For, who can think the custom of eating with one's fingers disgusting, as now done in the East, when two or more put their hands into the same mess, and at the same time read that part of our sacred history which records, ' He that dip- peth his hand with me in the dish, &c. ?' INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. XXXlll I must own, every time that, dining with my Eastern friends, I performed this very natural operation (although, at the same time, let it be understood that I have a great respect for knives and forks), I could not help feeling my- self to be a living illustration of an ancient custom, and a proof of the authenticity of those records upon which our happiness depends. When- ever I heard the exclamation so fre- quently used in Persia, on the occa- sion of little miseries, * What ashes are fallen on my head !' instead of seeing any thing ridiculous in the ex- pression, I could not but meditate on the coincidence which so forcibly illus- XXXIV INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. trated one of the commonest expres- sions of grief as recorded in ancient writ. It is an ingenious expression which I owe to you, sir, that the manners of the East are as it were stereo- type. Although I do not conceive that they are quite so strongly marked, yet, to make my idea understood, I would say that they are like the last impressions taken from a copper-plate engraving, where the whole of the subject to be represented is made out, although parts of it from much use have been obliterated. INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. XXXV If I may be allowed the expression, a picturesqueness pervades the whole being of Asiatics, which we do not find in our own countries, and in my eyes makes every thing relating to them so attractive as to create a desire to impart to others the impressions made upon myself. Thus, in viewing a beautiful landscape, the traveller, be he a draughtsman or not, tant bien que maly endeavours to make a repre- sentation of it : and thus do I apolo- gize for venturing before the public even in the character of a humble translator. Impressed with such feelings you XXXVl INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. may conceive the fulness of my joy, when not very long after the con- versation abovementioned, having re- turned to England, I was fortunate enough to be appointed to fill an official situation in the suite of an ambassador, which our government found itself under the necessity of sending to the Shah of Persia. Persia, that imaginary seat of Oriental splen- dour ! that land of poets and roses ! that cradle of mankind, that uncon- taminated source of Eastern manners lay before me, and I was delighted with the opportunities which would be afforded me of pursuing my fa- vourite subject. I had an undefined INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. XXXVll feeling about the many countries I was about to visit, which filled my mind with vast ideas of travel. Sive per Syrtes iter aestuosas, Sive facturus per iiihospitalem Caucasum, vel quae loca fabulosus Larabit Hydaspes. I was in some degree like a French lady of my acquaintance, who had so general a notion of the East, that upon taking leave of her, she en- joined me to get acquainted with a friend of hers, living, as she said, quel- que pai't dans les Indes, and whom, to my astonishment, I found residing at the Cape of Good Hope! VOL. I. d XXXVlll INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. I will not say that all my dreams were realized, for perhaps no country in the world less comes up to one's expectation than Persia, whether in the beauties of nature, or the riches and magnificence of its inhabitants. But in what regards manners and customs, it appears to me that no Asiatics bear so strong the stamp of an ancient origin as they. Even in their features I thought to have di- stinguished a decided originality of expression, which was confirmed, when I remarked, that the numerous faces seen among the sculptures of Perse- polis, so perfect as if chiseled but yes- terday, were so many likenesses of INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. XXxix modern Persians, more particularly of the natives of the province of Fars. During my long residence there, I never lost the recollection of our con- versation on the sofa of the Swedish palace, and every time I added an anecdote or an observation illustrative of Oriental manners to my store, or a sketch to my collection, I always thought of the Reverend Doctor Fundgruben, and sighed after that imaginary manuscript which some ima- ginary native of the East must have written as a complete exposition of the life of his countrymen. d2 Xl INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. I will not say, learned sir, that the years I passed in Persia were years of happiness ; or that during that time I could so far keep up an il- lusion, that I was living among the patriarchs in the first ages of the world, or among those Persians whose mon- archs gave laws to almost the whole of Asia : no, I sighed for shaven chins and swallow-tailed coats ; and, to speak the truth, though addressing an antiquary of your celebrity, I felt that I would rather be one among the crowd in the Graben at Vienna, or in our own Bond-street, than at liberty to range in the ease of solitude INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. xU among the ruins of the palaces of Darius. At length the day of my departure came, and I left Persia with books filled with remarks, and portfolios abounding in original sketches. My ideas during the journey were wholly taken up with schemes for the future, and perhaps, like every other traveller, I nourished a sort of sly and se- cret conviction that I had seen and observed things which no one before me had ever done, and that when I came to publish to the world the fruits of my discoveries, I should create a xlii INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. sensation equal at least to the dis- covery of a new planet. I passed at the foot of the ve- nerable Mount Ararat, and was for- tunate enough to meet with a favour- able moment for traversing the cold regions of Armenia, ' nee Armeniis in oris Stat glaeies iners menses per om- 71CS ;' and I crossed the dangerous borders of Turkey and Persia without any event occurring worthy of re- cord. But I must request your in- dulgent attention to what befell me at Tocat, for it is to that occurrence you are indebted for this letter, and INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. xliil the world for the accompanymg vo- lumes. Jt was at the close of a fatiguing day's journey, that I and my escort, consisting of two Tatars, two ser- vants, and the conductors of our bag- gage and post-horses, entered the city of Tocat. Our approach w^as as usual announced by the howls of the Surigees, who more than usually ex- erted their lungs in my service, be- cause they felt that these sounds, the harbingers of rest and entertainment, could but be agreeable to weary and jaded travellers like ourselves. The moon was shining bright as our caval- xliv INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE, cade clattered over the long paved road leading to the city, and lighted up, in awful grandeur, the turret-topped peaks which rear their heads on the crest of the surrounding abrupt crags. On entering the post-house, 1 was immediately conducted into the tra- vellers' room, where having disencum- bered myself of my cloak, arms, and heavy boots, and putting myself at ease in my slippers and loose dress, I quietly enjoyed the cup of strong coffee and the chibouk y which were immediately handed to me, and after that my dish of rice, my tough fowl, and my basin of sour curds. INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. xlv I was preparing to take my night's rest on the sofas of the post-house, where my bed had been spread, when a stranger unceremoniously walked into the room, and stood before me. I remarked that he was a Persian, and, by his dress, a servant. At any other moment I should have been happy to see and converse with him, because having lived so long in Persia, I felt myself in some measure iden- tified with its natives, and now in a country where both nations were treated with the same degree of con- tempt, my fellow-feeling for them became infinitely stronger. xlvi INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. I discovered that he had a tale of misery to unfold, from the very dole- ful face that he was pleased to make on the occasion, and I was not mis- taken. It was this — that his master, one Mirza Hajji Baba, now on his re- turn from Constantinople, where he had been employed on the Shah's business, had fallen seriously ill, and that he had been obliged to stop at Tocat, — that he had taken up his abode at the caravanserai, where he had already spent a week, during which time he had been attended by a Frank doctor, an inhabitant of Tocat, who, instead of curing, had in fact brought INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. xlvii him to his hist gasp, — that having heard of my arrival from Persia, he had brightened up, and requested, without loss of time, that I would call upon him, for he was sure the presence of one coming from his own country would alone restore him to health. In short, his servant, as is usual on such occasions, finished his speech by saying, that with the exception of God and myself, he had nothing left to depend upon in this life. I immediately recollected who Mirza Hajji Baba was ; for although I had lost sight of him for several years, yet once on a time I had seen much of xlviii INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. him, and had taken great interest in every thing that regarded him, owing to his having been in England, whither, in quality of secretary, he accompanied the first ambassador which Persia had sent in modern times. He had since been employed in various ways in the government, sometimes in high and sometimes in lower situations, under- going the vicissitudes which are sure to attend every Persian, and at length had been sent to Constantinople, as resident agent at the Porte on the part of the Shah. I did not hesitate an instant, tired and jaded as I was, immediately to INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. xlix accompany his servant ; and in the same garb in which I was, only throw- ing a cloak over my shoulders, I walked in all haste to the caravan- serai. There, on a bed spread in the mid- dle of a small room, surrounded by several of his servants, I found the sick Mirza, looking more like a corpse than a living body, \\lien I had first known him he was a remarkably hand- some man, with a fine aquiline nose, oval face, an expressive countenance, and a well-made person. He had now passed the meridian of life, but his features were still fine, and his eye 1 INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. full of fire. As seen as he saw he recognized me, and the joy which he felt at the meeting broke out in a great animation of his features, and in , the thousand exclamations so common to a Persian's lips. ' See,' said he, ' what a fortunate destiny mine is, that at a moment when I thought the angel of death was about to seize me for his own, the angel of life comes and blows a fresh existence into my nostrils !' After his first transports were over, I endeavoured to make him explain what was the nature of his complaint. INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. li and how it had hitherto been treated. I saw enough by his saffron hue, that bile was the occasion of his disorder, and as I had had great experience in treat- ing it during my stay in Persia, I did not hesitate to cheer up his hopes by an assurance of being able to relieve him. ' What can I say?' said he. ' I thought at first that I had been struck with the plague. My head ached in- tensely, my eyes became dim, I had a pain in my side, and a nauseous taste in my mouth, and expected to die on the third day; but no, the symptoms still continue, and I am alive. As soon as I arrived here, I lii INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. inquired for a physician, and was told there were two practitioners in the town, a Jew and a Frank. Of course I chose the latter, but, 'tis plain, that my evil star had a great deal to say in the choice I made. I have not yet been able to discover to what tribe among the Franks he belongs, — cer- tainly he is not an Englishman. But a more extraordinary ass never existed in this world, be his nation what it may. I began by telling him that I was very, very ill. All he said in an- swer, with a grave face, was, * Mash- cillah! Praise be to God !' and when, in surprise and rage, I cried out, * but I shall die, man !' with the same grave INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. liii face, he said ^Inshallah! Please God !* My servants were about to thrust liim from the room, when they found that he knew nothing of our language ex- cepting these two words, which he had only learnt to misapply. Supposing that he still might know something of his profession, I agreed to take his medicine ; but I might have saved myself the trouble, for I have been daily getting worse.' Here the Mirza stopped to take breath. I did not permit him to exert himself further, but, without loss of time, returned to the post- voL. I. e liv INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. house, applied to my medicine-chest, and prepared a dose of calomel, which was administered that evening with all due solemnity, I then retired to rest. The next morning I repaired to his bed-side, and there, to my great satisfaction, found that my medicine had performed wonders. The patient's eyes were opened, the head-ache had in great measure ceased, and he was, in short, a different person. I was received by him and his servants with all the honours due to the greatest sage, and they could not collect INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE, Iv words sufficiently expressive of their admiration of my profound skill. As they were pouring forth their thanks and gratitude, looking up I saw a strange figure in the room, whose person I must take the liberty to describe, so highly ludicrous and extravagant did it appear. He was of the middle size, rather inclined to be corpulent, with thick black eye- brows, dark eyes, a three days' beard, and mustachios. He wore the Turkish long dress, from his shoulders down- wards, yellow pahoucJies, shawl to his waist, and carried a long cane in his hand j but from his shoulders up he e 2 Ivi INTRODUCTOllY EPISTLE. was a European, a neckcloth, his hair dressed in the aile de pigeon fashion, a thick tail clubbed, and over all an old- fashioned, three-cornered laced hat. This redoubtable personage made me a bow, and at the same time accosted me in Italian. I was not long in discovering that he was my rival, the doctor, and that he was precisely what, from the description of the Mirza, I expected him to be, viz. an itinerant quack, who perhaps might once have mixed medicines in some apothecary's shop in Italy or Con- stantinople, and who had now set up for himself, in this remote corner of INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. Ivii Asia, where he might physic and kill at his pleasure. I did not shrink from his acquaint- ance, because I was certain that the life and adventures of such a person must be highly curious and entertain- ing, and I cordially encouraged him in his advances, hoping thus to ac- quire his confidence. He very soon informed me who he was, and what were his pursuits, and did not seem to take the least umbrage at my having prescribed for his pa- tient without previously consulting Iviii INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. him. His name was Ludovico Pestello, and he pretended to have studied at Padua, where he had got his diploma. He had not long arrived at Constan- tinople, with the intention of setting up for himself, where, finding that the city overflowed with Esculapii, he was persuaded to accompany a Pasha of two tails to Tocat, who had recently been appointed to its government, and was there now established as his body physician. I suspected this story to be fabrication, and undertook to examine his knowledge of physic, particularly in the case of my friend the Persian Mirza. The galimatia INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. llX which he unfolded, as we proceeded, was so extremely ridiculous, and he puzzled himself so entirely by his answers to the plain questions which I put, that at length, not being able to proceed, he joined, with the best good nature possible, in the horse laugh, from which I could not refrain. I made him candidly confess that he knew nothing of medicine, more than having been servant to a doctor of some eminence at Padua, where he had picked up a smattering ; and that, as all his patients were heretics and abominable Musulmans, he never could feel any remorse for those which during his practice he iX INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. had despatched from this world. * But, caro Signor Dottore,'* said I, ' how in the name of all that is sacred, how have you managed hitherto not to have had your bones broken ? Turks are dangerous tools to play with.' ' Oh,' said he, in great unconcern, * the Turks believe any thing, and I take care never to give them medicine that can do harm.' * But you must have drugs, and you must apply them,' said I. ' Where are they?' ' I have different coloured liquids,' INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. 1x1 said he, * and as long as there is bread and water to be had I am never at a loss for a pill. I perform all my cures with them, accompanied by the words Inshallah and Mashallah /' * Bread and water ! wonderful !' did I exclaim. * Signer, si,* said he, * I sprinkle my pills with a little flour for the common people, cover them with gold leaf for my higher patients, the Agas and the Pasha, and they all swallow them without even a wry face.' I was so highly amused by the ac- Ixii INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. count which this extraordinary fellow gave of himself, of the life he led, and of the odd adventures which he had met with, that I invited him to dine ; and were it not for the length which this letter has already run, I should perhaps have thought it right to make you partake of my entertainment by retailing his narrative. I repaid him, as he said, over and above, by pre- sents from my medicine-chest, which he assured me would be plentifully sufficient to administer relief to the whole of Asia Minor. I could not think of leaving the poor Persian in such hands ; and feel- INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. Ixiil ino- that I mio'lit be the means of saving his life, I determined to re- main at Tocat until I saw him out of danger. After three days' administration of calomel, Hajji Baba's complexion was much restored to its original hue, and as he might now be said to be free from danger, and in a fair way of recovery, I proposed proceeding on my journey. The poor man could not find words for the expression of his gratitude, and I saw that he was labouring hard to discover a pre- sent worthy of my acceptance. At Ixiv INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. length, just before taking my leave, he desired his servants to leave us alone, and spoke to me in the following words : ' You have saved my life ; you are my old friend and my deliverer. What can I do to show my gratitude ? Of worldly goods I have but few ; it is long since I have received any salary from my government, and the little money I have here will barely suffice to take me to my own country. Be- sides, I know the English, — they are above such considerations, it would be in vain to offer them a pecuniary re- INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. Ixv ward. But I have that by me which, perhaps, may have some value in your eyes — I can assui'e you that it has in mine. Ever since I have known your nation, I have remarked their inquisitiveness, and eagerness after knowledge. Whenever I have tra- velled with them, I observed they re- cord their observations in books j and when they return home, thus make their fellow-countrymen acquainted with the most distant regions of the globe. Will you believe me, that I, Persian as I am, have followed their example, and that during the period of my residence at Constantinople I Ixvi INTEODUCTORY EPISTLE. have passed my time in writing a de- tailed history of my life, which, al- though that of a very obscure and ordinary individual, is still so full of vicissitude and adventure, that I think it would not fail to create an interest if published in Europe ? I offer it to you 5 and in so doing, I assure you that I wish to show you the confidence I place in your generosity, for I never would have offered it to any one else. Will you accept it ?' Conceive, my dear sir, conceive my happiness upon hearing this — upon at length getting into my pos- INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. Ixvii session precisely the sort of work which you so long since had looked upon as a desideratum in the hi- story of mankind, and which I had utterly despaired of ever seeing in reality. My eyes, I am sure, glistened with pleasure when I expressed my sense of the Mirza's liberality ; and as fast as I refused his offer, (for I thought it but generous to do so upon the terms he proposed) the more he pressed it upon me. As a farther inducement, he said. Ixviii INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. that he was going back to his coui;itry, uncertain if he enjoyed the favour of the Shah ; and as he had freely ex- pressed his sentiments, which included his observations upon England, he was afraid, should he be in disgrace, and his work be found upon him, that it might lead to his destruction. Unable to withstand these entrea- ties, I at length acceded to his re- quest, and became the possessor of the manuscript. It forms the subject of the following work j and tell me, can I dedicate it to any but him who first awakened my mind to its INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. Ixix value ? If you will do me the favour to peruse it, you will find I have done my best endeavour to adapt it to the taste of European readers, divest- ing it of the numerous repetitions, and the tone of exaggeration and hyper- bole which pervade the compositions of the Easterns ; but still you will no doubt discover much of that deviation from truth and perversion of chrono- logy which characterise them. How- ever, of the matter contained in the book, this I must say, that having lived in the country myself during the time to which it refers, I find that most of the incidents are grounded upon VOL. I. f IXX INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. fact, which, although not adhered to with that scrupulous regard to truth which we might expect from a Euro- pean writer, yet are sufficient to give an insight into manners. Many of them will no doubt appear improbable to those who have never visited the scenes upon which they were acted ; and it is natural it should be so, because, from the nature of cir- cumstances, such events could only occur in Eastern countries. A distinct line must ever be drawn between * the nations who wear the hat and those who wear the beard j' and INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. Ixxi they must ever hold each other's stories as improbable, until a more general intercourse of common life takes place between them. What is moral and virtuous with the one, is wickedness with the other, — that which the Christian reviles as abo- minable, is by the Mohamedan held sacred. Although the contrast be- tween their respective manners may be very amusing, still it is most certain that the former will ever feel devoutly grateful that he is neither subject, to Mohamedan rule, nor educated in Mo- hamedan principles ; whilst the latter, in his turn, looking upon the rest of Ixxii INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. mankind as unclean infidels, will con- tinue to hold fast to his bigoted per- suasion, until some powerful inter- position of Providence shall dispel the moral and intellectual darkness which, at present, overhangs so large a portion of the Asiatic world. Fearing to increase the size of the work, I have refrained adding the numerous notes which my long re- sidence in Persia would have enabled me to do, and have only occasionally made explanations necessary to un- derstand the narrative. In the same fear, I have not ventured to take INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. Ixxiii Hajji out of his own country. His remarks upon England during his re- sidence there, and during his travels, may perhaps be thought worthy of future notice ; and should they be called for, I will do my best endea- deavour to interpret his feelings as near to nature as possible. I must now, dear sir, take my leave, expressing my regret at your absence from Constantinople on my return from Persia ; for had I then been fortunate enough to meet you, no doubt, from the valuable hints Ixxiv INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. which you would have afforded me, the work now presented to you would have been in every way more worthy of your acceptance. But you were far better engaged ; you were seeking another Oasis in the wilds of the de- sert (that emblem of yourself in hiero- glyphic lore), to which, so I was in- formed, you expected to have been guided by information gained in the inside wrappers of one of your most interesting Mummies. May your footsteps have been for- tunate, and may I live to have the INTRODUCTORY EPISTLE. IxxV pleasure of assuring you by word of mouth how truly I am, esteemed and learned sir, Your very devoted and obliged humble servant, Perp:grine Persic. London^ \st December, 1823. THE ADVENTURES OF HAJJI BAB A. CHAPTER I. Of Hqjji Bahas birth and education. My father, Kerbelai Hassan, was one of the most celebrated barbers of Ispahan. He was married, when only seventeen years of age, to the daughter of a chandler, wJio lived in the neighbourhood of his shop ; but the connexion was not fortunate, for his wife gave him no offspring, and he, in consequence, neglected her. His dexterity in the use of the razor had gained for him, together with no little renown, such great custom, particularly among the merchants, that after twenty years' industry, he found VOL. I. B 2 THE ADVENTURES OF he could afford to add a second wife to his harem ; and succeeded in obtaining the daughter of a rich money-changer, whose head he had shaved, during that period, with so much success, that he made no difficulty in granting his daughter to my father. In order to get rid, for a while, of the importunities and jealousy of his first wife, and also to acquire the good opi- nion of his father-in-law (who, although noted for clipping money, and passing it for lawful, affected to be a saint), he un- dertook a pilgrimage to the tomb of Ho- sein, at Kerbelah. He took his new wife with him, and she was delivered of me on the road. Before the journey took place he was generally known, simply as * Hassan the barber;' but ever after, he washonoured by the epithet of Kerbelai; and I, to please my mother, who spoilt me, was called Hajji or the pilgrim, a name which stuck to me through life, and procured for me a great deal of unmerited respect ; be- cause, in fact, that honoured title is seldom HAJJI BABA. 3 conferred on any but those who have made the great pilgrimage to the tomb of the blessed Prophet at Mecca. My father having left his business during his absence to his chief apprentice, re- sumed it with increased industry on his return; and the reputation he had ac- quired by his pious journey of being a zealous Mussulman, attracted the clergy, as well as the merchants, to his shop. It being intended that I should be brought up to the strap, I should perhaps have not received more of an education than was necessary to teach me my prayers, had I not been noticed by a mollah^ who kept a school in an adjoining mosque, whom my father (to keep up the character he had acquired of being a good man) used to shave once a week, as he was wont to ex- plain, purely for the love of God. The holy man repaid the service by teaching me to read and write ; and I made such progress under his care, that in two years I could decypher the Koran, and began to write 4 THE ADVENTUJIES OF a legible hand. When not in school I attended the shop, where I learnt the ru- diments of my profession, and when there was a press of customers, was permitted to practise upon the heads of muleteers and camel-drivers, who indeed sometimes paid dear for my first essays. By the time I was sixteen it would be difficult to say whether I was most accom- plished as a barber or a scholar. Besides shaving the head, cleaning the ears, and trimming the beard, I became famous for my skill in the offices of the bath. No one understood better than I the different modes of rubbing or shampooing, as prac- tised in India, Cashmere, and Turkey ; and I had an art peculiar to myself of making the joints to crack, and my slaps resound. Thanks to my master, I had learnt suf- ficiently of our poets to enable me to enliven conversation with occasional apt quotations from Saadi, Hafiz, &c.; this accomplish- ment, added to a good voice, made me con- IIAJJI BAB A. sidered as an agreeable companion by all those whose crowns or limbs "were sub- mitted to my operation. In short, it may, without vanity, be asserted that Hajji Baba was quite the fashion among the men of taste and pleasure. My father's shop being situated near the Royal Caravanserai, the largest and most frequented in the city, was the re- sort of most of the foreign, as well as of the resident, merchants ; they not un- frequently gave him something over and above the usual price, for the entertain- ment they found in the repartees of his hopeful son. One of them, a Bagdad merchant, took great fancy to me, and always insisted that I should attend upon liim, in preference even to my more ex- perienced father. He made me converse with him in Turkish, of which I had ac- quired a slight knowledge, and so excited my curiosity by describing the beauties of the different cities which he had visited, 6 THE ADVENTURES OF that I soon ]Mt a strong desire to travel. He was then in want of some one to keep his accounts, and as I associated the two quahfications of barber and scribe, he made me such advantageous offers, to enter into his service, that I agreed to follow him; and immediately mentioned my determination to my father. My fa- ther was very loath to lose me, and endea- voured to persuade me not to leave a cer- tain profession for one which was likely to be attended with danger and vicissitudes ; but when he found how advantageous were the merchant's offers, and that it was not impossible that I might become one myself in time, he gradually ceased to dissuade my going; and at length gave me his blessing, accompanied by a new case of razors. My mother's regret for the loss of my society, and her fears for my safety, de- rived no alleviation from the prospect of my expected future aggrandizement ; she HAJJI BABA. 7 augured no good from a career begun in the service of a Suni * ; but still, as a mark of her maternal affection, she gave me a bag of broken biscuit, accompanied by a small tin case of a precious unguent, which, she told me, would cure all fractures, and internal complaints. She further di- rected me to leave the house with my face towards the door, by way of propitiating a happy return from a journey undertaken under such inauspicious circumstances. * It is needless to remind the reader, that the Mussulmans are divided into two reHgious and inimical sects; viz. Su7ii andShiah; and that the Turks are of the former,and the Persians of the latter persuasion. The Si'mies hold, that Omar, Osman, and Abubekr, were the lawful successors of Mo- hamed. The Shiahs assert, that they were usurpers, and that Ali, his son-in-law, was the next in suc- cession. THE ADVENTURES OF CHAPTER II. Hajj'i Baha commences his travels — His encounter with the Turcomans, and his captivity. OsMAN Aga, my master, was now on a journey to Meshed, the object of which was to purchase the lambskins of Bokhara, which he afterwards purposed to convey to Constantinople for sale. Imagine a short squat man, with a large head, prominent spongy nose, and a thick, black beard, and you will see my fellow traveller. He was a good Mussulman, very strict in his devotions, and never failed to pull off his stockings, even in the coldest morning, to wash his feet, in order that his ablutions might be perfect ; and, withal, he was a great hater of the sect of Ali, a feeling he strictly kept to himself, as long as he was in Persia. His prevailing passion was love of gain, and he never went to sleep with- HAJJI BABA. 9 out having ascertained that his money was deposited in a place of safety. He was, however, devoted to his own ease ; smoked constantly, eat much, and secretly drank wine, although he denounced eternal per- dition to those who indulged in it openly. The caravan was appointed to collect in the spring, and we made preparations for our departure. My master bought a strong, ambling mule for his own riding ; whilst I was provided with a horse, which, besides myself, bore the pipe (for he adopted the Persian style of smoking), the fire-pan and leather bottle, the charcoal, and also my own wardrobe. A black slave, who cooked for us, spread the carpets, loaded and unloaded the beasts, bestrode another mule, upon which were piled the bedding, carpets, and kitchen utensils. A third, carrying a pair of trunks, in which was my master's wardrobe, and every other necessary, completed our equipment. The day before our departure, the pru- dent Osman had taken the precaution to 10 THE ADVENTURES OF sew into the cotton wadding of his heavy turban fifty ducats, a circumstance known only to him and me, and these were to serve in case of accidents ; for the remain- der of his cash, with which he intended to make his purchases, was sewn up in small white leather bags and deposited in the very centre of the trunks. The caravan being ready to depart con- sisted of about five hundred mules and horses, and two hundred camels, most of which were laden with merchandize for the north of Persia, and escorted by about one hundred and fifty men, composed of mer- chants, their servants, and the conductors of the caravan. Besides these, a small body of pilgrims bound to the tomb of Imam Reza at Meshed joined the ca- ravan, and gave a character of sanctity to the procession of which the other members of it were happy to take advantage, con- sidering in what high estimation persons bound upon so laudable a purpose as a pil- grimage are always supposed to be held. HAJJI BABA. 11 Everyman on these occasions is armed, and my master, who always turned his head away whenever a gun was fired, and be- came pale at the sight of a drawn sword, now appeared with a long carbine slung obliquely across his back, and a crooked sword by his side, whilst a pair of huge pistols projected from his girdle: the rest of his surface was almost made up of the apparatus of cartouch-boxes, powder- flasks, ramrods, &c. I also was armed cap-a-pie, only in addition to what my master carried, I was honoured by wield- ing a huge spear. The black slave had a sword with only half a blade, and a gun without a lock. We started at break of day from the northern suburb of Ispahan, led by the chamslies^ of the pilgrimage, who an- * Officers whose duties are to find quarters for the pilgrims^ establish the prices of provisions,, make arrangements for their supply, regulate the hours of march, settle disputes, and announce the time of prayer, &c. 12 THE ADVENTURES OF nounced our departure by loud cries and the beating of their copper drums. We soon got acquainted with our fellow-tra- vellers, who were all armed; but who, notwithstanding their martial equipment, appeared to be very peaceably disposed persons. I was delighted with the novelty of the scene, and could not help galloping and curvetting my horse to the annoyance of my master, who, in a somewhat crabbed tone, bid me keep in mind that the beast would not last the journey if I wore it out by unseasonable feats of horsemanship. I soon became a favorite with all the com- pany, many of whom I shaved after the day's march was over. As for my master, it is not too much to say that I was a great source of comfort to him, for after the fatigue of sitting his mule was at an end, I practised many of the arts which I had acquired at the bath to do away the stiff- ness of his limbs, by kneading his body all over, and rubbing him with my hands. We proceeded without impediment to HAJJI BAB A. 13 Tehran, where we sojourned ten days to rest our mules and to increase our num- bers. The dangerous part of the journey was to come, as a tribe of Turcomans, who were at war with the king of Persia, were knovrn to infest the road, and had lately attacked and plundered a caravan, whilst at the same time they had carried those who composed it into captivity. Such were the horrors related of the Turcomans, that many of our party, and my master in particular, were fearful of proceeding to Meshed ; but the account he received of the enormous price of lambs' skins at Constantinople was so alluring, that, in spite of every thing, he resolved not to be frightened out of his prospect of gain. A chaoush had long been collecting pilgrims at Tehran and its vicinitj^, in the expectation of the arrival of our caravan, and as soon as we had made our appear- ance, he informed us, that he was ready to join us with a numerous band, a rein- forcement which he assured us vhile it lasted, I collected enough from the zeal and credulity of my disciples to enable me to pass the remainder of my life in comfort. I have lived at Mashed for some time ; and it is but a week ago that Ave contrived to perform the miracle of giving sight to a bhnd girl ; so now are held in the highest veneration/ Here the Dervish Sefer ended his history, and then called upon his next neighbour to give an account of him- self. This was the dervish who had been his accomplice among the Hezareh, and he began as follows : * My father was a celebrated man of the law, of the city of Kom, enjoying the re- putation of saying his prayers, making his ablutions, and keeping his fasts more regularly than any man in Persia : in short, he was the cream of Shiahs, and the model of Musulmans. He had many sons, and we were brought up in the 124 THE ADVENTUllES OF strictest practice of the external parts of our religion. The rigour and severity with which we were treated were com- bated on our part by cunning and dis- simulation. These qualities gradually fixed themelves in our character ; and without any consideration for our circumstances, we were early branded as a nest of hypo- crites, and as the greatest cheats and liars of our birth-place. I, in particular, was so notorious, that in my own defence I be- came a dervish, and I owe the reputation which I have acquired in that calling to the following fortunate circumstance. * I had scarcely arrived at Tehran, and had taken up my quarters opposite to a druggist's shop, when I was called up in a great hurry by an old woman, who in- formed me that her master, the druggist, had just been taken exceedingly ill, after having eat more than usual; that the medicine which he had taken had not per- formed its office; and that his family wished to try what a talisman would do for him : HAJJI BABA. 125 she therefore invited me to write one suited to his case. As I had neither paper, pens, nor ink, I insisted on going into his anderun, or women's apartments, and writing it there, to which she con- sented. I was introduced into a small square yard, and then into a room, where I found the sick man extended on his bed on the ground, surrounded by as many women as the place could hold, who cried aloud, and exclaimed, * "joaM, fvahi, in the name of God, he dies, he dies r The implements of medicine were spread about, which showed that every thing had been done either to kill or save hira. A large basin, which had contained the prescription, was seen on the shelf; the long glass tube, that in- strument of torture, was in a corner; and among other furniture, the doctor himself was seen seated, quietly smoking, and who, finding that all human means had failed, had had recourse to super- natural, and had prescribed, as a last re- 12G THE ADVEXTL'RES OF •source, the talisman, which it was my fate to write. A new dervish excited new hopes, for I saw that I produced much stir as soon as I entered the sick room. I asked for paper with an air of authority, as if I felt great confidence in my own powers, (although, in fact, I liad never written a talisman before), and a large piece was brought to me, which seemed to have been the wrapper to some drug or other. Pen and ink were also given to me; and then calling up all the gravity I v\-as master of, I scrawled the paper over in a variety of odd characters, which here and there contained the names of Allah, Mohamed, Ali, Hassan, and Hossein, and all the Imams, placing them in different anagrams, and substituting here and there figures instead of letters. I then handed it over with great ceremony to the doctor, who calling for water and a basin, washed the whole of the writing from off the paper into the basin, whilst the by- standers offered up prayers for the effi- HAJJI KABA. 127 cacy of the precious writing. The doctor then said, * In the name of the prophet, let the patient take this ; and if fate hath decreed that he is to live, then the sacred names which he will now swallow will restore him : but if not, neither my skill, nor that of any other man, can ever be of the least avail.' ' The draught was administered, and, for some time after, the eyes of all around were fixed upon the wretched man's face, as if they expected that a resuscitation would instantly ensue. He remained for some time without showing any symptom of life ; when, to the asto- nishment of all, not excepting myself and the doctor, he groaned, opened his eyes, raised his head on his arm, then called for a basin, and at length vomited in such a manner as would have done credit to the prescription of Abu Avi- cenna himself. In short, he recovered. In my own mind, I immediately attri- buted the happy change to the drug 128 THE ADVENTURES OF which had been wrapped in the paper, and which, with the nausea of the ink, had produced the effect just described; but I took care to let the bystanders know that the cure was entirely owing to the interference, and to the hand writing of one of my sanctity ; and that but for me he would have died. ' The doctor, on the other hand, took all the merit of the case to himself; for as soon as his patient opened his eyes, he exclaimed, * Did I not tell you so ?' and in proportion as the draught operated, he went on exulting thus : * There, there, see the efficacy of my prescription ! If it had not been for me, you would have seen the druggist dead before you.* ^ I, however, would not aEow him to proceed, and said : * If you are a doctor, why did you not cure him without calling for me ? Keep to your blisters and to your bleedings, and do not interfere with that which doth not belong to you/ * He answered, * Mr. Dervish, I make HAJJI BAEA. 129 no doubt that you can write a very good talisman, and also can get a very good price for it ; but every one knows who and what dervishes are ; and if their talismans are ever of use, it is not their sanctity which makes them so.' * * Whose dog are you,' exclaimed I, in return, ' to talk to me after this manner ? I, who am a servant of the prophet. As for you doctors, your ignorance is pro- verbial : you hide it by laying all to fate : if by chance your patient recovers, then you take all the credit of the cure to your- selves ; should he die, you say, God hath decreed thus ; what can the efforts of man avail ? Go to, go to ; when you have nearly killed your next patient, and then know not what more to ordain, send for me again, and I will cover your impudent ignorance by curing him as I have just done the druggist/ * ' By my head, and by your death,' re- turned the doctor, ' I am not a man to hear this from any one, much less from a VOL. I. K 130 TilK ADVKXTUIIES OF dog of a dervish :' and immediately he got up, and approached me in a threatening attitude, mtiking use of every epithet of abuse that he could think of. * I received him with suitable expres- sions of contempt, and we very soon came to blows : he fastened upon my hair, and I upon his beard, with such violence, that w^e plucked out whole handfuls from each other : v^^e bit and spat, and fought with such fury, heedless of the sick man and the cries of the women, that the uproar became very great, and perhaps would have terminated in something serious, if one of the women had not run in to us, in great agitation, assuring us that the Darogah's officers (police men) were then knocking at the door of the house, and inquiring w^hence proceeded all the dis- turbance. ' This parted us ; and then I was happy to find that the bystanders were in my favour, for they expressed their contempt of the skill of the physician, whose only ob- IIAJJI 13 ABA. 131 ject was to obtain money from them with- out doing his patients any good, whilst they looked upon me in the light of a divine person, who in my hand-writing alone possessed the power of curing all manner of disease. * The doctor, seeing how ill matters were going for him, stole away wdth the best face he could ; but before he left the room, he stooped down, and collecting as many of the hairs of his beard, w^hich I had plucked from him, as he could find, to which he added some of my own hair, he brandished them in my face, saying, * We shall see on whose side the laugh will be when you are brought before the Cadi to-morrow; for beards are worth a ducat per hair in Tehran, and I doubt, with all your talismans, whether you can buy these that I hold in my hand.' ' It was evident, that when his anger was cooled, cut of regard to his own reputa- tion, he would not put Iiis threat into exe- cution ; so the fear of being dragged be- k2 132 THE ADVENTURES OF fore the justice gave me no uneasiness, and I therefore only considered how to make the most of the fortunate circum- stance which had just taken place. The report that the druggist (who was the first in Tehran) had been brought to hfe, when on the point of death, by a dervish who was just arrived, was soon spread about, and I became the object of general concern. From morning to night I was taken up in writing talismans, for which I made my customers pay according to their means, and in a short time I found myself the possessor of some hundreds of piastres. But unfortunately for me, I did not meet with a dying druggist and a piece of his paper every day; and feeling myself re- duced to live upon the reputation of this one miracle, which I perceived to my sorrow daily diminished, I made a virtue of necessity, and determining to make the tour of Persia, I immediately left Tehran. To whichsoever city I bent my steps, I managed matters so adroitly, that I made HAJJI baba. 133 iny reputation precede my arrival there. The druggist had given me an attestation, under his seal, that he had been restored to life by virtue of a talisman written by my hand, and this I exhibited wherever I went, to corroborate the truth of the re- ports which had been circulated in my favour. I am now living upon this re- putation : it supports me very tolerably for the present, but whenever I find that it begins to fail, I shall proceed elsewhere.' — The dervish here en ded his history. When the third dervish came to his turn to speak, he said : * My tale is but short, although story-telling is my pro- fession. I am the son of a schoolmaster, who, perceiving that I was endowed with a very retentive memory, made me read and repeat to him most of the histories with which our language abounds; and when he found that he had furnished my mind with a sufficient assortment, he turned me out into the world under the garb of a dervish, to relate them in public 134 THE ADVENTURES OF to such audiences as my talents might gather round me. ' My first essays were any thing but suc- cessful. My auditors heard my stories, and then walked away without leaving me any reward for my pains. Little by little I acquired experience. Instead of being carried away, as I had at first permitted myself to be, by the interest of the story, I made a pause when the catastrophe drew near, and then, looking around me, said, ' All ye that are present, if ye will be liberal towards me, I will tell ye what fol- lows ;' and I seldom failed in collecting a good handful of copper dinars. For in- stance, in the story of the Prince of Khatai and the Princess of Samarcand, when the Ogre Hezar Mun seizes the prince, and is about to devour him ; when he is suspended in the ogre's mouth, be- tween his upper and lower jaw; when the princess, all dishevelled and forlorn, is on her knees praying that he may be spared ; when the attendants couch their lances. IIAJJI r>ABA. 13o and are in dismay; when the horses start back in fright ; when the thunder rolls, and the ogre growls ; then I stop, and say, ' Now, my noble hearers, open your purses, and ye shall hear in how mira- culous a manner the Prince of Khatai cut the ogre's head oif !' By such arts, I manage to extract a subsistence from the curiosity of men ; and when my stock of stories is exhausted in one place, I leave it, travel to another, and there renew my labours.' 136 THE ADVENTURES OF CHAPTER XII. Hnjjl Baha Jinds that fraud does not remain un- punished, even in this world. — He makes fresh plans. The dervishes having finished their narratives, I thanked them for the enter- tainment and instruction which they had afforded me, and I forthwith resolved to learn as much from them as possible, in order to become a dervish myself, in case I should be obliged to abandon my present business. Dervish Sefer instructed me in the numerous tricks which he practised, to impose himself upon the world as a per- son of great sanctity ; I learned the art of writing talismans from the second ; and the story-teller taught me some of the tales with which his head was stored, lent me his books, and gave me general rules HAJJI BAB A. 137 how to lead on the curiosity of an au- dience, until their money should insensibly be enticed from their pockets. In the mean while, I continued to sell my tobacco and my pipes ; but owing to my intimacy with the dervishes, who smoked away all my profits, I was obliged to adulterate the tobacco of my other cus- tomers considerably more than usual ; so that in fact they enjoyed little else than the fumes of dung, straw, and decayed leaves. One evening, when it was dusk, and about the time of closing the bazars, an old woman in rags, apparently bent double with age, stopped me, and requested me to dress a pipe for her to smoke. She was closely veiled, and scarcely uttered a word beyond her want. I filled her one of my very worst mixture : she put it to her mouth ; and at her spitting, coughing, and exclamations, half a dozen stout fellows, witli long twigs in their hands, imme- 13S THE ADVENTURES OF diately came up, seized me, and threw me on my back. The supposed old wo- man then cast off her veil, and I beheld the Mohtesib* in person. ' At length, wretch of an Ispahani /' said he, ' I have caught you — you, that have so long been poisoning the people of Meshed with your abominable mixtures. You shall receive as many strokes on your feet as you have received dinars for your pipes.' ^ Bring \hQfelek\y said he, to his officers, * and lay on till his nails drop off.' My feet were instantly inserted into the dreaded noose, and the blows fell upon them so thick, that I soon saw the images of ten thousand Mohtesibs, intermixed * The Mohtesib is an ofncer who perambulates the city, and examines weights and measures, and the qualities of provisions. + The felek is a long pcle, with a noose in the middle, through which the feet of him who is to be bastinadoed are passed, whilst its extremities are held up by two men, for the two others, who strike. HAJJI BAB A. 139 with ten thousand old women, dancing be- fore my eyes, apparently enjoying my tor- ture, and laughing at my writhing and contortions. I implored the mercy of my tormentor by the souls of his father, mo- ther, and grandfather — by his own head — by that of his child — and by that of his prince — by the Prophet — by Ali — and by all the Imams. I cursed tobacco. I re- nounced smoking. I appealed to the feel- ings of the surrounding spectators, to my friends the three dervishes, who stood there stirring neither limb nor muscle for me ; in short, I bawled, cried, entreated, until I entirely lost all sensation and all recollection. At length, when I came to myself, I found that I was seated with my head against the wall on the side of the road, surrounded by a crowd gaping at my miserable situation. No one seemed to pity me. My pipes, my jug, and every thing that I possessed, had been taken 140 THE ADVENTUHES OF from me, and I was left to crawl to my home as well as I was able. Luckily it was not far off, and I reached it on my hands and knees, making the most piteous moans imaginable. After I had remained a day in horrid torment, with my feet swelled into a mis- shapen mass of flesh and gore, I received a visit from one of the dervishes, who ven- tured to approach me, fearful, as he told me, of being taken up as my accomplice, in case he had come sooner to my help. He had, in his early career, undergone a similar beating himself, and, therefore, knew what remedies to apply to my limbs, which, in a short time, restored them to their former state. During my confinement, I had time to reflect upon my situation. I deter- mined to leave Meshed, for I felt that I had entered it at an unlucky hour. Once my back had been sprained, and once I had been bastinadoed. I had managed to collect a small sum of money, which I kept HAJJI BAB A. 141 carefully buried in a corner near my room ; and with this I intended to make my Avay to Tehran by the very first caravan that should be on its departure. I communi- cated my plan to the dervishes, who ap- plauded it; and, moreover, the Dervish Sefer offered to accompany me; ' for,"* said he, ' I have been warned that the priest- hood of Meshed are jealous of my in- creasing influence, and that they are lay- ing a plot for my ruin ; and, as it is impos- sible to withstand their power, I will try my fortunes elsewhere.' It was agreed that I should put on the dress of a dervish ; and having made my purchases, in the bazar, of a cap, some beads, and a goat's skin, which I slung across my shoulder, I was ready to begin my journey at a moment's warning. We became so impatient to depart, that we had ahnost made up our minds to set off without any other companions, and trust to our good fortune to find our road, and escape the dangers of it ; but we de- 142 THE ADVENTL'KES OF termined to take ixfall out of Saadi, before we came to a resolution. Dervish Sefer, after making the usual prayer, opened the book, and read : ' It is contrary to reason, and to the advice of the wise, to take medicine without confidence, or to travel an unknown road without accom- panying the caravan.' This extraordinary warning settled our minds, and we de- termined to be guided by it. On making inquiries about the de- parture of caravans for Tehran, I was de- lighted to meet my friend Ali Katir, the muleteer, who was just arrived at Meshed, and who was then making a bargain with a merchant, to take his merchandize, con- sisting of the lambs^ skins of Bokhara, to the capital. As soon as he saw me, he uttered an exclamation of delight, and im- mediately lighted his water pipe, which he invited me to smoke with him. I re- lated all my adventures since we last parted, and he gave me an account of his. Having left Meshed with a caravan for IlAJ.n EALA. 143 Ispcihan, with his mules loaded partly with bars of silver, and partly with lambs' skins ; and having undergone great fears on ac- count of the Turcomans — he reached his destination in safety. That city was still agitated with the recollections of the late attack of the caravanserai, of which I have given an account; and the general belief was, that the invaders had made their approach in a body, consisting of more than a thousand men ; that they had been re- ceived with great bravery, and that one Kerbelai Hassan, a barber, had, with his own hand, wounded one of the chiefs so severely, that he had escaped with the greatest difficulty. I had always kept this part of my ad- ventures secret from every body; so I hid any emotion that miglit appear on my face from the muleteer, by puffing out a suf- licient volume of smoke in his face. From Ispahan he carried cotton stuffs, tobacco, and copper ware to Yezd, where he remained some time, until a caravan was 144 THE ADVENTURES OF collected for Meshed, when he loaded his mules with the manufactures of the former city. Ali Katir agreed that Dervish Sefer and I should return with him to Tehran, and that whenever we were tired with walking, he would willingly assist us, by permitting us to mount his mules. IIAJJI BAB A. \4i) CHAPTER XIII. HftJJi Bab a leaves Meshed, is cured of his sprain, and relates a siory. When I had cleared the gate which leads out of Meshed to Tehran, I shook the collar of my coat, and exclaimed to my- self: May Heaven send thee misfortunes '/ for had I been heard by any one of the pilgrims, who were now on their return — it very probably would have gone ill with me. My companion. Dervish Sefer, whom I knew to be of my mind, entered into my feelings, and we both vented our spleen against the inhabitants of that place ; I for the drubbings which had been inflicted upon me, he for the persecutions he had undergone from the Mollahs. * As for you, my friend,' said he to me, ' you are young ; you have much to suffer VOL. I. L 14G THE ADVENTURES OF before you gain the experience necessary to carry you through hfe : do not repine at the first beating ; it will probably save you many more, and will teach you another time to discover a Mohtesib, although hid under a woman's veil: but (taking hold of his beard) for a man of my age, one who has seen so much of the world, to be obliged to set out upon his travels again, is truly a great misfortune.' * But it would have been easy for you,' said I, * to remain at Meshed, if you had chosen it : had you been regular in your prayers and ablutions, you might have bid defiance to the Mollahs.' ' That is true enough,' said the Dervish ; * but the fact is, that the festival of the Ramazan is now close at hand, when I should have been more closely watched than ever by them ; and as I cannot and will not fast, (smoking being as necessary to me as air, and wine as daily bread) I have thought it better to make a journey ITAJJI BABA. 147 (luring that time, for the sake of the in- dulgence which is permitted to travellers. 1 might perhaps have deceived them, as I have frequently done before, by eating and smoking in secret; but one so notorious as I, who lives by the supposed sanctity of his character, being narrowly watched, cannot take such liberties."* We arrived at Semnan without the oc- currence of any thing remarkable, except- ing, that a day or two before we reached it, when I was helping my friend Ali Katir to load one of his mules, I sprained my back again in its old place : the pain was so great, that it became impossible for me to proceed with the caravan, and I de- termined to remain where I was until I had been relieved ; particularly, as all dan- ger from the Turcomans having passed, it was needless to make myself any longer a dependent upon a caravan. Dervish Sefer, who was anxious to get to the wine and pleasures of the capital, continued his journey. L 2 148 THE ADVEXTLTcES OF I took np my abode in a tomb on the skirts of the town ; and having spread my goat's skin in a corner of it, I proclaimed my arrival, according to the custom adopted by travelling dervishes, by blowing my horn, and making my exclamations of Hah, Hu^ Allah Ahhar^ in a most sono- rous and audible manner. I had allowed my person to acquire a wild and extrava- gant appearance, and flattered myself that I did credit to the instructions which had been given me in the arts of deception. I was visited by several women, for whom I wrote talismans, and they repaid me by small presents of fruit, milk, ho- ney, and other trifles. My back became so painful, that I was obliged to inquire if no one at Semnan could afford me relief The barber and the farrier were the only two supposed to possess any medical ta- lents ; the one skilled in bleeding, drawing teeth, and setting a limb ; the other, from his knowledge in the diseases of horses, being often consulted in human ailments. There IIAJJI BAB A. 1-19 was also a gts sefid, or grey wig, an old woman of a hag-like and decrepit appear- ance, M'lio w as looked up to as an oracle in all cases where the knowledge of the barber and farrier was of no avail, and who had besides a great many nostrums and recipes for all sorts of aches. Each came to me in succession : all were agreed that my disorder proceeded from cold ; and as fire was the hottest thing in opposition to cold that they knew of, they as unani- mously agreed that the actual cautery should immediately be applied to the part ; and the farrier, on account of his dealings in hot and cold iron, was appointed ope- rator. He accordingly brought a pan of charcoal, a pair of bellows, and some small skewers ; and seating himself in a corner, made his fire, and heated his skewers : when they were red hot, I was placed on the ground flat on my face, and then, with great solemnity,my back was seared with the burning iron, whilst all the by-standers, at 150 THE ADVENTURES OF every touch, exclaimed, with great earnest- ness, * Klioda she fa midelied,' God gives relief. My medical attendants, in their united wisdom, out of compliment to the prophet and the twelve Imams, marked me in thirteen diiFerent places ; and although, when I had endured half the operation, I began to cry out most lustily with the pain, still I was not let off until the whole was gone through. It was long before the wounds which they had inflicted were cured ; and as they never would heal unless I was kept in perfect quiet, I confined my- self to my cell for a considerable time; at the end of which, my sprain had entirely taken its leave, and strength was restored to my whole frame. Of course, my recovery was attributed to the thirteen worthies, who had presided over the operation, and all the town became more than ever persuaded of the efficacy of hot iron ; but I could not but think that long repose had been my best doctor — an opinion which I took care IIAJJI BAliA. 1j1 to keep to myself; for I had no objection that the workl shoukl beHeve that I was a protege of so many holy personages. I now determmed to pursue my jour- ney to Tehran ; but before I ventured to produce myself as a dervish upon that stage, I resolved to try my talent in re- lating a story before a Semnan audience. Accordingly, I went to a small open space, that is situated near the entrance of the bazars, where most of the idlers of the town flock about noon ; and making the sort of exclamations usual upon such occasions, I soon collected a crowd, who settled themselves on the ground, round the place which I had fixed upon for my theatre. A short story, touching a barber at Bagdad (which I had heard when I was myself in that profession), luckily came into my memory ; and, stand- ing in the middle of a circle of louts with uplifted eyes and open mouths, I made my debut in the following words; ' In the reign of the Caliph Haroun- 152 THE ADVENTURES OF al Rashid, of happy memory, lived in the city of Bagdad a celebrated barber, of the name of Ali Sakal. He was so fiimous for a steady hand, and dexterity in his profession, that he could shave a head, and trim a beard and whiskers, with his eyes biind-folded, without once drawing blood. There was not a man of any fashion at Bagdad who did not em- ploy him ; and such a run of business had he, that at length he became proud and insolent, and would scarcely ever touch a head, whose master was not at least a Beg' or an Aga, Wood for fuel was always scarce and dear at Bagdad ; and as his shop consumed a great deal, the wood-cutters brought their loads to him in preference, almost sure of meeting with a ready sale. It happened one day, that a poor wood-cutter, new in his profes- sion, and ignorant of the character of Ali Sakal, went to his shop, and offered him for sale a load of wood, which he had just brought from a considerable distance in HAJJI BAUA. 153 the country, on his ass : AU mimediately oftered him a price, making use of these words, \for all the xvood that zvas upon the ass.' The wood-cutter agreed, unloaded his beast, and asked for the money. * You have not given me all the wood yet,' said the barber ; ' I must have the pack- saddle (which is chiefly made of wood) into the bargain; that was our agree- ment.' * How !' said the other, in great amazement — * who ever heard of such a bargain? — it is impossible.' In short, after many words and much altercation, the overbearing barber seized the pack- saddle, wood and all, and sent away the poor peasant in great distress. He immediately ran to the Cadi, and stated his griefs : the Cadi was one of the barber's customers, and refused to hear the case. The wood-cutter applied to a higher judge : he also patronized Ali Sakal, and made light of the complaint. The poor man then appealed to the Mufti himself; who, having pondered over the 154 THE ADVENTURES OF question, whilst he sipped half a dozen cups of coffee, and smoked as many pipes, at length settled, that it was too difficult a case for him to decide, no pro- vision being made for it in the Koran, and therefore he must put up with his loss. The wood-cutter was not dis- heartened; but forthwith got a scribe to write a petition to the Caliph in person, which he duly presented on Friday, the day when he went in state to the mosque. The Caliph's punctuahty in reading petitions is well known, and it was not long before the wood-cutter was called to his presence. When he had approached the Caliph, he kneeled and kissed the ground, and then placing his arms straight before him, his hands covered with the sleeves of his cloak, and his feet close together, he awaited the decision of his case. * Friend,' said the Caliph, * the barber has words on his side — you have equity on yours. The law must be defined by words, and agree- HAJJI BABA. 155 ments must be made by words : the former must have its course, or it is nothing ; and agreements must be kept, or there would be no faith between man and man ; there- fore the barber must keep all his wood ; but — ' Then calling the wood-cutter close to him, the Caliph whispered something in his car, which none but he could hear, and then sent him away quite satisfied.' Here then I made a pause in my narra- tivcj and said (whilst I extended a small tin cup which I held in my hand) ; ' Now, my noble audience, if you will give me something, I will tell you what the Caliph said to the wood-cutter.' I had excited great curiosity, and there was scarcely one of my hearers who did not give me a piece of money. ' Well then,' said I, ' the CaUpli whis- pered to the wood-cutter what he was to do, in order to get satisfaction from the barber, and what that was I will now re- late. The wood-cutter having made his obeisances, returned to his ass, which was 156 THE ADVENTURES OF tied without, took it by the halter, and proceeded to his home. A few days after, he apphed to the barber, as if nothing had happened between them, requesting that he, and a companion of his from the coun- try, might enjoy the dexterity of his hand ; and the price at which both operations were to be performed was settled. When the wood-cutter's crown had been pro- perly shorn, Ali Sakal asked where his companion was. * He is just standing without here,' said the other, * and he shall come in presently.' Accordingly he went out, and returned, leading his ass after him by the halter. * This is my com- panion,' said he, *and you must shave him.' ' Shave him !' exclaimed the barber, in the greatest surprise ; ' it is enough that I have consented to demean myself by touching you, and do you insult me by asking me to do as much to your ass? Away with you, or I'll send you b^th to Jehanum;' and forthwith drove them out of his shop. HAJJI BAB A. 157 *The wood-cutter immediately went to the Caliph, was admitted to his presence, and related his case. ''Tis well,' said the commander of the faithful : * hring AH Sakal and his razors to me this instant,' he exclaimed to one of his officers ; and in the course of ten minutes the barber stood before him. * Why do you refuse to shave this man's companion ?' said the Caliph to the barber: *was not that your agreement?' Ali, kissing the ground, an- swered: "Tis true, O Caliph, that such was our agreement ; but who ever made a companion of an ass before ? or who ever before thought of treating it like a true believer V * You may say right,' said the Caliph : ' but, at the same time, w^ho ever thought of insisting upon a pack-saddle being included in a load of wood? No, no, it is the wood-cutter's tuni now. To the ass immediately, or you know the con- sequences.' The barber was then obliged to prepare a great quantity of soap, to lather the beast from head to foot, and to 158 THE ADVENTURES OF shave him in the presence of the Caliph and of the whole court, whilst he was jeered and mocked by the taunts and laughing of all the bystanders. The poor wood-cutter was then dismissed with an appropriate present of money, and all Bagdad resounded with the story, and celebrated the justice of the commander of the faithful.' IIAJJI BAP A. 159 CHAPTER XIV. Off/i,' niau he meets, and of the consequences of the encounter. I LEFT Seiiinan with a light heart — my sprain was cured — I was young and hand- some — twenty tomauns, my savings at ]Meshed, cUnked in my purse — I liad ac- quired some experience in the world; and I determined, as soon as I reached Tehran, to quit the garb of a dervish, to dress myself well from head to foot, and to endeavour to push my fortunes in some higher walk in life. About a day's journey from Tehran, as I was walking onward, chanting, with all my throat, a song on the loves of Lel- laJi and Majfioun^ I was overtaken by a courier, who entered into conversation with me, and invited me to partake of some victuals which he had brought with him. 160 THE ADVEXTURES OF The heat of the day being overpowering, I willingly accepted his invitation. We settled ourselves on the borders of a rivulet, near a corn-field, whilst the courier took oif his horse's bridle, and permitted it to feed on the new wheat. He then groped up, from the deep folds of his riding trowsers, a pocket handkerchief, in which was wrapped several lumps of cold boiled rice, and three or four flaps of bread, which he spread before us, and then added some sour curds, which he poured from a small bag that hung at his saddle bow. From the same trowsers, which contained his shoes, a provision of tobacco, a drinking cup, and many other useful articles, he drew half a dozen raw onions, which he added to the feast ; and we eat with such appetite, that very soon we were reduced to the melancholy dessert of sucking our fingers. We washed the whole down with some water from the rivulet, and only then (such had been our voracity) we thought of questioning each HAJJI BAB A. lO'l Other concerning the object of our re- spective journeys. From my dress, he per- ceived me to be a dervish, and my story was soon told : as for himself, he was a courier belonging to the governor of As- terabad, and, to my joy and surprise, was carrying the happy intelligence of the release of my former companion, Asker Khan, the Shah's poet, from his captivity among the Turcomans. I did not let the courier know how much I was interested in his errand, for experience had taught me how wise it was, in the affairs of life, to keep one's own counsel ; and, therefore, I pretended ignorance of even the exist- ence of such a person. My companion informed me that the poet had managed to reach Asterabad in safety, and that, being destitute of every thing, he, in the meanwhile, had been de- spatched to give intelligence of his situation to his family. He showed me the letters with which he was entrusted, which he VOL. I. M 1(52 THE ADVFA'TUllES OF drew forth from his breast, wrapped up in a handkerchief; and being a very inquisitive fellow, though unable to read, he was happy to find in me one who might give him some account of their contents. The first which I inspected was a memorial from the poet to the king of kings, in which he set forth, in language the most poetic, all the miseries and tortures which he had endured since he had been thrown into the hands of the Turcomans : that the hunger, the thirst, and the barbarous treatment which he had experienced, were nothing, when compared with the privation of the all-gracious and refulgent presence of that pearl of royalty, that gem of mag- nificence, the quintessence of all earthly perfection, the great king of kings ! that as the vilest reptile that crawls is permitted to enjoy the warmth of the glorious sun, so he, the meanest of the king's subjects, hoped once more to bask in the sunshine of the royal countenance ; and, finally, IIAJJI BABA. 1G3 he humbly prayed, that his long absence might not deprive him of the shadow of the throne ; that he might aspire to re-occupy his former post near his majesty's person, and once again be permitted to vie with the nightingale, and sing of the charms and perfections of his lovely rose. The next letter was addressed to the prime vizier, in which that notorious mini- ster, decrepit in person, and nefarious in conduct, was called a planet among the stars, and the sheet-anchor of the state, and in which the poet sues for his protection. There was neaa-ly a similar one to his former enemy, the lord high treasurer. I then inspected the letters addressed to his family, of which one was to his wife, an- other to his son's tutor, and a third to his steward. To his wife, he talked of the interior arrangements of his anderun ; hoped that she had been economical in her dress, that she had kept the female s)aves in good order, and desired her im- m2 164 THE ADVENTURES OF mediately to set herself and them about making clothes for him, as he was de- stitute of every thing. To the tutor, he enjoined great atten- tion to his son's manners ; that he should be taught all the best forms of cant and compliment; that he should never omit his prayers ; and that he was to be parti- cular in teaching him how to ride; and as soon as possible to perform the spear exercise, and to fire a gun, on the full gallop, from off his horse. To his steward, he gave some general instructions concerning the administration of his affairs — enjoined great economy; — that he should daily go and stand before the prime vizier ; praise him to the skies ; and make all sorts of professions, on his part, to his excellency ; that he should keep a good watch upon his women and slaves ; that his wife should not go too often to the bath ; that when she and her slaves went abroad to take the air, he HA.TJI BAB A. 1 (J .') should accompany them ; that lie should not admit any intriguing old women, par- ticularly Jewesses, into his harem ; and that the walls, which surrounded the wo- men's apartments, should always be kept in good repair, in order to prevent gad- ding on the house-top with the neigh- bours ; that his black slave, Johur, having now reached the age of puberty, he was no longer to be allowed free access into the anderiin ; and if he was ever seen to be familiar with any of the female slaves, lie and they were to be whipped : finally, he ordered the steward to give the courier a handsome reward, for being the bearer of such good news to his family. I folded up the letters again; — those which had been sealed, I again sealed, and returned to the courier. He seemed to reckon a great deal upon the reward that he was to get for bringing the first intelli- gence of the poefs safety, and told me that, fearing some other might get the start of him, he had travelled day and night ; and lOG THE ADVENTURES OF added, that the horse, which he now rode, belonged to a peasant, from whom he had taken it forcibly on the road, having left his own, which was knocked up, to be brought on after him. After we had conversed a little more, he seemed entirely overpowered by fatigue, and fell into a profound sleep. As he lay extended on the grass, I looked upon him, and I began to reflect how easy it would be to forestall him. I knew the whole of the poet's history ; — in fact, I was in some measure identified with it.^ — I began to think that I had a right to the first rela- tion of it. — Then as to the horse, it was as much mine as his; particularly since the peasant, with his own, must now be close at hand: — so without more ceremony, I unfolded the handkerchief, which still lay in his lap, and taking out the letter to the steward, I mounted the horse : I ap- plied the stuTups to his sides ; I galloped off; and in a very short time had left the sleeper far behind me, and had made HAJJI BABA. 167 considerable progress on the road to the capital. As I rode along, I considered what was now my best Une of conduct, and in what manner I should best introduce myself to the poet's family, so as to make my story good, and secure for myself the reward which had been destined for the courier. I calculated that I should have at least a good day's start of him ; for when he awoke, he probably would be obhged to walk some distance before he got another horse, should he not regain his own, which was very doubtful ; and appearing on foot as he did, it would be an hundred to one if any body would believe his story, and he, most probably, would now be refused the loan of a beast to carry him on. I resolved, therefore, immediately upon reaching Teh- ran, that I would sell the horse, and its accoutrements, for what they would fetch ; I would then exchange my dervish's dress for the common dress of the country ; and making myself up as one come from off a 168 THE ADVENTURES OF long journey, I would present myself at the gate of the poet's house, and there make the best story I could, which would be a sufficiently easy matter, considering how well I was acquainted with every circum- stance relating to him. HAJJI BAB A. IGD CHAPTER XV. Haij'i Baha reaches Tehran, and goes io the poet's house. I ENTERED Tehran early in the morn- ing by the Shah Abdul Azim gate, just as it was opened, and immediately exhibited my horse for sale at the market, which is daily held there, for that purpose. I had proved it to be a good beast, from the rate at which I had travelled since taking my hasty leave of the courier; but a horse-dealer, to whom I showed it, made out so clearly that it was full of de- fects, that I thought myself in luck, if I got any thing at all for it. It was chup* — * The Persians have a particular aversion to horses which have white legs on one side, which 170 THE ADVENTURES OF it had the ctblch — it was old, and its teeth had been burnt ; — in short, it seemed to have every quality that a horse ought not to have. I was therefore surprised when he offered me five tomauns for it, pro- vided I threw him the bridle and saddle into the bargain ; and he seemed as sur- prised, when I took him at his word, and ac- cepted of his offer. He paid me down one half of the money, and then offered me a half-starved ass in payment of the remain- der; but this I refused, and he promised to pay me in full when we met again. I was too much in haste to continue bargaining any longer ; so going straightway to the bazar, I bought a black cap, laid by my dervish's tiara, and having equipped my- self in a manner to be taken for one come they call chup ; and they also very much under- value a horse that has the ahleh, which consists of white leprous marks on its nose;, round the eyes, and under the tail. HAJJI BABA. 171 from off a journey, I inquired my way to the house of the poet. It was situated in a pleasant quarter of the town, surrounded by gardens filled with poplars and pomegranate trees, and in a street through which ran a stream of water, bordered by beautiful clienars. But the house itself seemed indeed to speak the absence of its master : the gate was half closed ; there was no stir about it ; and when I entered the first court, I could perceive but few indications of an inhabitant. This looked ill for my pro- mised reward. At length, making my way to the upper room, that was situated over the gate, I there saw a man of about fifty years old, seated on a felt carpet, smoking his water pipe, whom I found to be the very person I was in search of, viz. the Nazir or steward. I immediately exclaimed, * Good news ! the khan is coming.' * Yani cheh? what do you mean?' said he ; * which khan ? where ? when V 172 THE ADVENTURES OF When I had explained myself, and had presented the letter addressed to him, he seemed to be thrown into a mixed state of feigned joy and real sorrow, amazement, and apprehension. ' But are you very sure,' said he, ' that the khan is alive ?' * Very sure,' returned I; * and before to- morrow is over, you will receive another courier, who will give you many more particulars of his safety, and who will bring letters to the king, viziers, and others.' He then began to make all sorts of in- coherent exclamations ; * This is a won- derful business ! What dust has fallen upon our heads! — Where shall I go? — What shall I do?' When he had a little recovered himself, I endeavoured to persuade him to give me an explanation of his emotions on this oc- casion, and tell me why he felt so agitated, and apparently distressed, at what ought only to be a matter of joy. All I could hear HAJJI BAB A. 173 from him was, * He must be dead; every body says he is dead ; his wife dreamt that she had lost her largest tooth, the one that gave her such aching pain, and therefore he is dead : besides the king has settled it so. He cannot be alive ; he must not be alive.' * Well,' said I, * if he is dead, be it so ; all I can say is, that he was one of the true believers at Asterabad, not six days ago ; and that he will soon prove in person, by showing himself at Tehran, in the course of another week.** After the Nazir had sat, and wondered, and ruminated for some time, he said, 'You will not be surprised at my perplexity when I tell you of the state of things here, in consequence of the report of my mas- ter's death. In the first place, the Shah has seized all his property: his house, furniture, and live-stock, including his Georgian slaves, are to be given to Khur Ali Mirza, one of the king's younger sons : his village now belongs to the prime vizier : 174 THE ADVENTURES OF his place is about to be bestowed upon Mirza Fuziil ; and, to crown all, his wife has married his son's tutor. Say, then, whether or no I have not a right to be astonished and perplexed ?' I agreed that there was no disputing his right ; ' but, in the mean while,' said I, * what becomes of my reward ?' ' O, as for that,' answered the Nazir, ' you cannot expect any thing from me; for you have brought me no joyful tidings : you may claim it from ^y master, when ha comes, if you choose, but I can give you nothing.' Upon which, promising to return on some future day, I left the Nazir to his own reflections, and quitted the house. IIAJJI IJAllA. 175 CHAPTER XVI. He makes plans for the future, and is involved in a (juarrel. ~ I DETERMINED to Wait the arrival of the poet, and through his interference to en- deavour to get into some situation, where I might gain my bread honestly, and acquire a chance of advancing myself in life, with- out having recourse to the tricks and frauds which I had hitherto practised : for I v.as tired of herding with the low and the vulgar ; and I saw so many in- stances before me of men rising in the world, and acquiring both riches and ho- nour, who had sprung from an origin quite as obscure as my own, that I already an- ticipated my elevation, and even settled in my own mind how I should act when I was a prime vizier. ' Wlio," said I to myself, * was the Shah's 176 THE ADVENTUEES OF chief favourite, Ismael Beg tellaiy or the golden, but aferaslt, or a tent pitcher? He is neither handsomer nor better spoken than I; and if ever there should be an opportunity of comparing our horseman- ship, I think one who has been brought up amongst the Turcomans would show him what riding is, in spite of his reputa- tion. Well; and the famous lord high treasurer, who fills the king's coffers with gold, and who does not forget his own — who and what was he ? A barber's son is quite as good as a green-grocer's, and, in our respective cases, a great deal better too ; for I can read and write, whereas his excellency, as report says, can do neither. He eats and drinks what he likes ; he puts on a new coat every day; and after the Shah, has the choice of all the beauties of Persia ; and all this without half my sense, or half my abilities : for to hear the world talk, one must believe him to be little better than a Ichur he ieshdeed, i. e. a doubly accented ass. HAJJI BABA. 177 I continued wrapt up in these sort of meditations, seated with my back against the wall of one of the crowded avenues which lead to tlie gate of the royal palace, and had so worked up my imagination by the prospect of my future greatness, that on rising to walk away, I instinctively pushed the crowd from before me, as if such re- spect from them was due to one of my lofty pretensions. Some stared at me, some abused me, and others took me for a mad- man ; and indeed when I came to myself, and looked at my tattered clothes and my beggarly appearance, I could not help smiling at their surprise, and at my folly; and straightway went into the cloth bazar in the determination of fitting myself out in decent apparel, as the first step towards my change of life. Making my way through the crowd, I was stopped by a violent quarrel between three men, who were abusing each other with more than ordinary violence. I pushed into the circle which surrounded VOL. I. N 1/8 THE ADVENTURES OF them, and there, to my dismay, discovered the courier, whom I had deceived, se- conded by a peasant, attacking the horse- dealer, whom they had just pulled oft* the horse, which I had sold him. ^ That is my horse,' said the peasant. ' That is my saddle,' said the courier. ' They are mine,' exclaimed the horse- dealer. I immediately saw the danger in which I stood, and was about to slink away, when I was perceived by the horse-dealer, who seized hold of my girdle, and said, ' This is the man I bought the horse of.' As soon as I was recognised by the courier, imme- diately the whole brunt of the quarrel, like a thunder-cloud, burst on my head, and I was almost overwhelmed by its violence. Rascal, thief, cheat, were epithets which were dinned into my ears without mercy. ' Where's my horse?" cried one. — ' Give me my saddle,' vociferated the other. — * Return me my money,' roared out a third. — ' Take him to the cadi,' said the crowd. HAJJI BAB A. 179 In vain I bawled, swore, and bade de- fiance ; in vain I was all smoothness and conciliation : it was impossible for the first ten minutes to gain a hearing : every one recited his griefs. The courier's rage was almost ungovernable ; the peasant com- plained of the injustice which had been done him ; and the horse-dealer called me every sort of name, for having robbed him of his money. I first talked to the one, then coaxed the other, and endeavoured to bully the third. To the courier I said, ' Why are you so angry? there is your saddle safe and sound, you can ask no more.' To the peasant I exclaimed, * You could not say more if your beast had actually been killed ; take him and walk away, and return thanks to Allah that it is no worse.' As for the horse-dealer, I inveighed against him with all the bitter- ness of a man who had been cheated of his property : ' You have a right to talk indeed of having been deceived, when to this moment you know that you have only 180 THE ADVEXTUHES OF paid me one half of the cost of the horse, and that you wanted to fob me off with a dying ass for the other half.' I offered to return him the money ; but this he refused : he insisted upon my pay- ing him the keep of the horse besides ; upon which a new quarrel ensued, in which arguments were used on both sides which convinced neither party, and con- sequently we immediately adjourned to the daroga or "police magistrate, who, we agreed, should decide the question between us. We found him at his post, at the cross streets in the bazar, surrounded by his officers, who, with their long sticks, were in readiness to inflict the bastinado on the first offender. I opened the case, and stated all the circumstances of it ; insisting very strongly on the evident intention to cheat me, which the horse-dealer had exhibited. The horse-dealer answered me, and showed that as the horse did not belong to him, it being stolen from another, he had no right to pay for its keep. HAJJI BAB A. 181 The question puzzled the daroga so much, that he declined interfering, and was about ordering us to the tribunal of the cadi, when a decrepit old man, a by- stander, said, * Why do you make so much difficulty about a plain question ? — when the horse-dealer shall have paid the Hajji the remaining half of the price of the horse, then the Hajji shall pay for the keep of the beast, as long as it was in the horse-dealer's possession."* Every one cried Barik Allah! Bank Allah! Praise be to God! and whether right or wrong, they all appeared so struck by the specious justice of the decision, that the daroga dismissed us, and told us to depart in peace. I did not lose a moment in repaying to the horse-dealer the purchase-money of the horse, and in getting from him a re- ceipt in full: it was only after he had settled with me that he began to pon- der over the merits of the decision, and seemed extremely puzzled to discover why, 182 THE ADVENTURES OF if he was entitled to the horse's keep at all, he was not entitled to it, whether he had paid me half or the whole of the money? He seemed to think, that he for once had been duped ; and very luckily his rage was averted from me to the daroga, who he very freely accused of being a puzzle-headed fool, and one who had no more pretension to law than lic had to honesty. *- HAJJI BAB A. 183 CHAPTER XVII. Ill' }>uts on new clothes, goes to the bath, and appears in a new character. I NOW looked upon myself as clear of tkis unpleasant business, which I had en- tirely brought on my own head, and con- gratulated myself that I had got off at so cheap a rate. I again made my way to the cloth bazar, and going to the first shop near the gate of it, I inquired the price of red cloth, of which it was my ambition to make a haru7ii, or cloak ; be- cause I thought that it would give that re- spectability to my appearance which I al- ways felt for those who wore it. The shop- keeper, upon looking at me from head to foot, said 'A haruni indeed ! and for whom do you want it, and who is to pay for it V 'For myself, to be sure,' answered I. 184 THE ADVENTUilES OF ' And what does such a poor devil as you want with such a coat V said he : ' Mirzas and Khans only wear them, and I am sure you are no such personage.' I was about to answer in great wrath, when a dalal or broker went by, loaded with all sorts of second-hand clothes, which he was hawking about for sale, and to him I immediately made application, in spite of the reiterated calls of the shop- keeper, who now too late repented of having driven me off in so hasty a man- ner. We retreated to a corner in the gateway of the adjacent mosque, and there the dalal, putting his load down, spread his merchandise before me. I was struck by a fine shot silk vest, trimmed in front with gold lace and gold buttons, of which I asked the price. The dalal extolled its beauty and my taste ; swore that it had belonged to one of the king's favourite Georgians, who had only worn it twice, and having made me try it on, walked around and around me, exclaiming all the HAJJI BAB A. 185 while, * Mashallah, Mashallahl' Praise be to God ! I was so pleased with this, that I must needs have a shawl for my waist to match, and he produced an old Cash- merian shawl full of holes and darns, which he assured me had belonged to one of the ladies in the king's harem, and which, he said, he would let me have at a reasonable price. My vanity made me prefer this commodity to a new Kermdn shawl, which I might have had for what I was about to pay for the old worn out Cashmere, and adjusting it so as to hide the defects, 1 wound it about my v/aist, which only wanted a dagger stuck into it, to make my dress complete. With this the dalal also supplied me, and when I was thus equipped I could not resist expressing my satisfaction to the broker, who was not backward in assuring me, that there was not a handsomer nor better drest man in Tehran. When we came to settle our accounts, the business wore a more serious aspect. 18G THE ADVEXTURES OF The (lalal began by assuring me of liis honesty, that he was not Hke other dalals, who asked an hundred and then took fifty, and that when he said a thing, I might depend upon its veracity. He then asked mefivetomaunsfor the coat, fifteen for the shawl, and four for the dagger, making altogether twenty-four tomauns. Upon hearing this, my delight subsided, for I had barely twenty tomauns in my pocket, and I was about stripping myself of my finery, and returning again to my old clothes, when the dalal stopped me, and said, * You may perhaps think that price a httle too much, but, by my head and by your soul, I bought them for that — tell me what you will give?' I answered, that it was out of the question dealing with him upon such high terms, but that if he would give them to me for five to- mauns I would be a purchaser. This he re- jected with disdain, upon which I stripped, and returned him his property. When he had collected his things again, and IIAJJI BABA. 187 apparently when all dealings between us were at an end, he said, ' I feel a friend- ship for you, and I will do for you, what I would not do for my brother — you shall have them for ten tomauns."* I again refused, and we stood higgling, until we agreed that I should pay him six, and one by way of a dress for himself. This was no sooner said than done. He then left me, and I packed up my bargain, with the intention of first going to the bath, and there equipping myself. On my road, I bought a pair of high- heeled green slippers, a blue silk shirt, and a pair of crimson silk trowsers, and having tied up the whole in my handker- chief, I proceeded to the bath. No one took notice of me as I entered, for one of my mean appearance could create no sensation, and I comforted my- self by the reflection, that the case would be changed as soon as I should put on my new clothes. I deposited my bundle in a corner, where I also undressed, and hav- 188 THE ADVENTURES OF ing wrapt myself round with a towel, I entered the bath. Here all ranks were on a level, in appear- ance at least, and I now flattered myself that my fine form, my broad chest, and narrow waist, would make me an object of ad- miration. I called to one of the daldks (bathing men), to wait upon me, and to go through the different operations of rub- bing with the hand, and of the friction with the hair bag, and I also ordered him to shave my head, to get ready the neces- sary materials for dying my beard, mus- taches, and curls, as well as my hands and the soles of my feet, and also to prepare the depilatory ; in short, I announced my intention of undergoing a complete lus- tration. The dalak, as soon as he began rub- bing me, expressed his admiration at my broad chest by his repeated exclamations ; and bearing in mind the influence which new clothes were likely to create, I be- haved like one who had been accustomed HAJJI BABA. 189 to this sort of praise and attention. He said that I could not have come at a luckier hour, for that he had just operated upon a Khan, who having received a dress of honour from the Shah, upon the occa- sion of hringing the first melons from Is- pahan, had been sent to the bath by the astrologers at this particular time, as the most fortunate for putting on a new dress. As soon as all was over, the dalak brought me some dry linen, and con- ducted me to the spot where I had left my clothes. With vvhat pleasure I opened my bundle and inspected my finery ! It appeared that I was renovated in propor- tion as I put on each article of dress. I had never yet been clothed in silk. I tied on my trowsers with the air of a man of fashion, and when I heard the rustling of my vest, I turned about in exultation to see who might be looking at me. My shawl v%as wound about me in the newest style, rather falling in front, and spread out large behind, and when the dagger glittered in 190 THE ADVENTURES OF iny girdle, I conceived that nothing could exceed the finish of my whole adjust- ment. I indented the top of my cap in the true Kajari or royal style, and placed it on my head considerably on one side. When the bathing man at length brought me the looking-glass, as a signal for pay- ing the bath, I detained him for the pur- pose of surveying myself, arranging my curls to twist up behind the ear, and pull- ing my mustaches up towards my eyes. I then paid him handsomely, and leaving my old clothes under his charge, I made my exit with the strut of a man of conse- quence. HAJJI hAB\. ](J\ CHAPTER XVIII. The jMjet returns from captivity. The consequences of it for Hajji Baba. I TOOK my road towards the poet's house, in the hope of gaining some intelH- gence about him. From the head of the street, I perceived a crowd surrounding the gate, and I was soon informed that he had just arrived, and had gone through the ceremony of making his entrance over the roof instead of through the door ; for such is the custom when a man who has been thought dead returns home ahve. I immediately pushed through the crowd, made my way into the room where the poet was seated, and with every demon- stration of great joy, congratulated liim upon his safe arrival. He did not recog- nise mc, and even when I had explained 192 THE ADVENTURES OF who I was, he could scarcely believe that one so trim and smart as I then was could be the same dirty ragged ruffian whom he had known before. The apartment was filled with all sorts of people, some happy at his return, others full of disappointment. Among the latter, and those who paid him the finest compliments, was Mirza Fuzul, the man who had been nominated to succeed him in his situation, and who did not cease ex- claiming, ' Your place has been empty, and our eyes are enlightened,' as long as he remained in the room. At length, a great bustle was heard, the doors were opened, and an officer from the king was announced, who commanded the poet forthwith to repair to the presence, which he did in the very clothes, boots, dust and all, in which he had travelled. The party then broke up, and I left the house in the determination of returning the next day ; but as I was going out of the yard, I met the Nazir, with whom I flAJJI BAB A. ]93 had had a conversation as before related. He did not appear to me to be among the happy ones. * In the name of Allah,' said I, ' you see that my words have proved true : the Khan is alive T ' True enough,' ansvvcred he, with a sigh ; * he is alive ; and may his life be a long one ! but God is great !' and then, making two or three more similar exclamations, he left me, ap- parently full of care and misery. I passed the remainder of the day in strolling about, and building castles in the air. I walked through the bazars, went to the mosques, and lounged among the idlers, who are always to be found in great numbers about the gate of the royal pa- lace. Here, the news of the day was the poet's return, and the reception which he had met with from the Shah. Some said, that his majesty, upon hearing of his ar- rival, had ordained that it could not be ; that he was dead, and must be so. Others, that, on the contrary, the king was happy at the intelligence, and had ordered ten VOL. I. o 194 THE ADVENTURES OF tomauns to be given to tlie bearer of it. The truth, however, was this; the king had been disappointed at the poet's resur- rection, because it destroyed the arrange- ments he had made with respect to his house and effects, and he was not disposed to give him a good reception ; but Asker, who well knew his majesty's passion for poetry, and particularly of that kind which sings the royal praises, had long since fore- seen the event, and had provided himself with an impromptu, which he had com- posed even when he was living an exile among the Turcomans. This he repeated at the proper moment ; and thus the tide of the king's favour, which was running full against him, he entirely turned, and made it flow to his advantage. In short, he had his mouth filled with gold for his pains, was invested with a magnificent dress, and was reinstated in his situation and his pos- sessions. I lost no time in again congratulating my adopted patron, and did not miss a single IIAJJI 13 ABA. 195 morning in attending his levee. Finding that he was favorably incHned towards me, I made known to him my situation, and en- treated him either to give me a place in his household, or to recommend me as a ser- vant to one of his acquaintance. I had found out that the Nazir's despondency at his master's return proceeded from the fear of being detected in certain frauds which he had committed on his property; and, as I hoped that I might eventually succeed to his situation, I expressed the greatest zeal for the poef s interest, and disclosed all that I knew concerning the delinquency of his servant. However, I did not suc- ceed ; for whether he had a clearer insight into cliaracters than I gave him credit for, or whether the Nazir managed to prove his innocence, and make me suspected, I know not ; but the fact was, that he kept his place, and I continued to be an at- tendant at the levees. At length, one morning Asker called me to Iiim, and said, * Hajji, my friend, you know o2 196 THE ADVEXTCEES OF how thankful I have always expressed my- self for your kindness to me when we were prisoners together in the hands of the Turcomans, and now I will prove my gra- titude. I have recommended you strongly to Mirza Ahmak, the king's Hakim Bashi, or chief physician, who is in want of a servant ; and I make no doubt, that if you give him satisfaction, he will teach you his art, and put you in the way of making your fortune. You have only to present your- self before him, saying that you come from me, and he will immediately assign you an employment. I had no turn for the practice of physic, and recollecting the story which had been related to me by the dervish, I held the profession in contempt: but my case was desperate ; I had spent my last dhiar, and therefore I had nothing left me but to ac- cept of the doctor's place. Accordingly, the next morning I proceeded to his house> which was situated in the neighbourhood of the palace ; and as I entered a dull. HAJJI BABA. 197 iieglected court yard, I there found several sick persons, some squatted against the wall, others supported by their friends, and others again with bottles in their hands, waiting the moment when the physician should leave the women^s apartments to transact business in public. I proceeded to an open window, where those who were not privileged to enter the room stood, and there I took my station until I should be called in. Within the room were se- veral persons who came to pay their court to the doctor (for every man who is an officer of the court has his levee), and from remarking them, I learnt how necessary it was, in order to advance in life, to make much of every thing, even the dog or the cat, if they came in my way, of him who can have access to the ear of men in power. I made my reflections upon the miseries I had already undergone, and was calcu- lating how long it would take me to go through a course of cringing and flattery to be entitled to the same sorts of attention 198 THK AJ)VENTU11ES OF myself, when I perceived, by the bows of those near me, that the doctor had seated hhnself at the window, and that the busi- ness of the day had commenced. The Hakim was an old man, with an eye sunk deep in his head, high cheek bones, and a scanty beard. He had a con- siderable bend in his back, and his usual attitude, when seated, was that of a pro- jecting chin, his head reclining back be- tween his shoulders, and his hands resting on his girdle, whilst his elbows formed two triangles on each side of his body. He made short snappish questions, gave little hums at the answers, and seemed to be thinking of any thing but the subject be- fore him. When he heard the account of the ailments of those who had come to con- sult him, and had said a few words to his little circle of parasites, he looked at me, and after I had told him that I was the person of whom the poet had spoken, he fixed his little sharp eyes upon me for a second or two, and then desired me to HAJJI BAB A. li)i) wait, for that he wished to speak to me in private. Accordingly, he soon after got up, and went out of tlie room, and I was called upon to attend him in a small se- parate court, closely walled on all sides, except on the one where was situated the khckcei, or private room, in which the doctor was seated. 200 THE ADVENTURES OF CHAPTER XIX. Hajji Baba gets into the service of the king's phy- sician. Of the manner he was jirst employed hy him. As soon as I appeared, the doctor in- vited me into the room, and requested me to be seated; which I did with all the humility which it is the etiquette for an inferior to show towards his superior for so great an honour. He informed me, that the poet had spoken very favorably of me, and had said that I was a person to be depended upon, particularly on account of my discretion and prudence ; that I had seen a great deal of life ; that I was fertile in expedients ; and that if any business in which circum- spection and secrecy were necessary was intrusted to me, I should conduct it with all the ability required. I bowed repeat- HAJJl BABA. 201 edly as he spoke, and kept my hands respectfully before me, covered with the border of my sleeve, whilst I took care that my feet were also completely hid. He then continued, and said — ' I have occasion for a person of your description precisely at this moment, and as I put great confidence in the recommendation of my friend Asker, it is my intention to make use of your good offices ; and if you suc- ceed according to my expectations, you may rest assured that it will be well for you, and that I shall not remain unmind- ful of your services,' Then requesting me to approach nearer to him, and in a low and confidential tone of voice, he said, looking over his shoulders as if afraid of being overheard ; ' Hajji, you must know that an ambassador from the Franks is lately arrived at this court, in whose suite there is a doctor. This in- fidel has already acquired considerable re- putation here. He treats his patients in a manner quite new to us, and has arrived 202 THE adventches of with a chest full of medicines, of which we do not even know the names. He pretends to the knowledge of a great many things of which we have never yet heard in Persia. He makes no distinction between hot and cold diseases, and hot and cold remedies, as Galenus and Avicenna have ordained, but gives mercury by way of a coohng medicine; stabs the belly with a sharp in- strument for wind in the stomach*; and, what is worse than all, pretends to do away with the small-pox altogether, by infusing into our nature a certain extract of cow, a discovery which one of their philosophers has lately made. Now^ this will never do, Hajji. The small-pox has always been a comfortable source of re- venue to me; I cannot afford to lose it, because an infidel chooses to come here and treat us like cattle. We cannot allow him to take the bread out of our mouths. * This alludes to tapping in cases of dropsy ; an operation unknown among the Persians, until our surgeons taught it them. HAJJI BABA. 203 But the reason why I particularly want your help proceeds from the following cause. The grand vizier was taken ill, two days ago, of a strange uneasiness, after having eat more than his usual quantity of raw lettuce and cucumber, steeped in vinegar and sugar. This came to the Frank ambassador's ears, who, in fact, was present at the eating of the lettuce, and he immediately sent his doctor to him, with a request that he might be permitted to administer relief. The grand vizier and the ambassador, it seems, had not been upon good terms for some time, because the latter was very urgent that some de- mand of a political nature might be con- ceded to him, which the vizier, out of con- sideration for the interests of Persia, was obliged to deny ; and, therefore, thinking that this might be a good opportunity of conciliating the infidel, and of coming to a compromise, he agreed to accept of the doctor's services. Had I been apprised of the circumstance in time, I 204 THE ADVENTURES OF should easily have managed to put a stop to the proceeding ; but the doctor did not lose an instant in administering his me- dicine, which, I hear, only consisted of one little white and tasteless pill. From all accounts, and as ill luck would have it, the effect it has produced is something quite marvellous. The grand vizier has received such relief, that he can talk of nothing else ; he says, ' that he felt the pill drawing the damp from the very tips of his fingers ;' and that now he has discovered in himself such newness of strength and energy, that he laughs at his old age, and even talks of making up the compliment of wives permitted to him by our blessed Prophet. But the mischief has not stopped here ; the fame of this medicine, and of the Frank doctor, has gone throughout the court ; and the first thing which the king talked of at the selam (the audience) this morning, was of its miraculous properties. He called upon the grand vizier to repeat to him all that he had before said upon HAJJI BABA. 205 the subject; and as he talked of the wonders that it had produced upon his person, a general murmur of applause and admiration was heard throughout the as- sembly. His majesty then turned to me, and requested me to explain the reason why such great effects should proceed from so small a cause, when I was obliged to answer, stooping as low as I could to hide my confusion, and kissing the earth — ' I am your sacrifice : O king of kings, I have not yet seen the drug which the infidel doctor has given to your majesty*'s servant, the grand vizier; but as soon as I have, I will inform your majesty of what it consists. In the meanwhile, your humble slave beseeches the Centre of the Universe to recollect, that the principal agent, on this occasion, must be an evil spirit, an enemy to the true faith, since he is an in- strument in the hands of an infidel; of one who calls our holy Prophet a cheat, and who disowns the all-powerful decrees of predestination."* 206 THE ADVEXTURES OF * Having said this, in order to shake his growing reputation, I retired in deep cogi- tation how I might get at the secrets of the infidel, and particularly inquire into the nature of his prescription, which has per- formed such miracles ; and you are come most opportunely to my assistance. You must immediately become acquainted with him ; and I shall leave it to your address to pick his brain and worm his knowledge out of him ; but as I wish to procure a specimen of the very medicine which hs administered to the grand vizier, being obliged to give an account of it to-morrov/ to the Shah, you must begin your services to me by eating much of lettuce and raw cucumber, and of making yourself as sick to the full as his highness the vizier. You may then apply to the Frank, who will, doubtless, give you a duplicate of the cele- brated pill, which you will deliver over to me.' ' But,' said I, who had rather taken fright at this extraordinary proposal. IIAJJI BABA. 207 * how shall I present myself before a man whom I do not know ? besides, such mar- vellous stories are related of the Euro- peans, that I should be puzzled in what manner to behave : pray give me some in- structions how to act.' ' Their manners and customs are totally different to ours, that is true,' replied Mirza Ahmak, ^ and you may form some idea of them, when I tell you, that in- stead of shaving their heads, and letting their beards grovr, as we do, they do the very contrary, for not a vestige of hair is to be seen on their chins, and their hair is as thick on their heads as if they had made a vow never to cut it off: then, they sit on little platforms, whilst we squat on the ground ; they take up their food with claws made of iron, whilst we use our fingers ; they are always walking about, we keep seated ; they wear tight clothes, we loose ones ; they write from left to right, we from right to left; they never pray, we five times a day ; in short, there 208 THE ADVENTURES OF is no end to what might be related of them; but most certain it is, that they are the most filthy people on the earth, for they hold nothing to be unclean ; they eat all sorts of animals, from a pig to a tortoise, without the least scruple, and that with- out first cutting their throats; they will dissect a dead body, without requiring any purification after it, and perform all the brute functions of their nature, with- out ever thinking it necessary to go to the hot bath, or even rubbing themselves with sand after them/ ' And is it true,' said I, * that they are so irascible, that if perchance their word is doubted, and they are called liars, they will fight on such an occasion till they die?' ' That is also said of them,' answered the doctor ; ' but the case has not hap- pened to me yet ; however, I must warn you of one thing, which is, that if they happen to admire any thing that you possess, you must not say to them, as you IIAJJI EABA. 209 would to one of us, * It is a present to you, it is your property," lest they should take you at your word and keep it, which you know would be inconvenient, and not what you intended ; but you must endeavour as much as possible to speak what you think, for that is what they like.' * But then, if such is the case,' said I, * do not you think that the Frank doctor will find me out with a lie in my mouth ; pretending to be sick when I am well; asking medicine from him for myself, when I want it for another?' ' No, no,' said the Mirza ; ' you are to be sick, really sick, you know, and then it will be no lie. Go, Hajji, my friend,' said he, putting his arm round my neck ; ' go, eat your cucumbers immediately, and let me have the pill by this evening.' And then coaxing me, and preventing me from making any farther objections to his unex- pected request, he gently pushed me out of the room, and I left him, scarcely know- ing whether to laugh or to cry at the new VOL. r. V 210 THE ADVENTURES OF posture which my affairs had taken. To sicken without any stipulated reward was what I could not consent to do, so I re- traced my steps, with a determination of making a bargain with my patron ; but, when I got to the room, he was no longer there, having apparently retreated into his harem; and, therefore, I was obliged to proceed on my errand. HAJJI BAB A. 211 CHAPTER XX. He succeeds in deceiving two of the faculty 3 getting a pillfrofn one, and a piece of gold from the other. I INQUIRED my way to the ambassador's house, and actually set off with the in- tention of putting the doctor's wishes into execution, and getting, if possible, a writh- ing disorder on the road ; but, upon more mature reflection, I recollected that a sto- mach ache was not a marketable commodity which might be purchased at a moment's notice ; for although lettuce and cucumber might disagree with an old grand vizier, yet it was a hundred to one but they would find an easy digestion in a young person like me. However, I determined to obtain the pill by stratagem, if I could not pro- cure it in a more direct manner. I consi- dered that if I feigned to be ill, the doctor would very probably detect me, and turn me 2J2 THE ADVENTURES OF out of his house for a cheat, so I preferred the easier mode of passing myself off for one of the servants of the royal harem, and then making out some story by which I might attain my end. I accordingly stepped into one of the old clothes' shops in the bazar, and hired a cloak for myself, such as the scribes wear; and then sub- stituting a roll of paper in my girdle in- stead of a dagger, I flattered myself that I might pass for something more than a common servant. I soon found out where the ambassador dwelt. Bearing in mind all that MirzaAhmak had told me, I rather approached the door of the doctor"'s residence with fear and hesitation, I found the avenues to it crowded with poor women, bearing infants in their arms, who, I was told, came to receive the new-fashioned preservative against the small-pox. This, it was sup- posed for political reasons, the Franks were anxious to promote; and, as the doctor performed the operation gratis, he had no lack of patients, particularly of the poorer HAJJI BAB A. 213 sort, who could not approach a Persian iloctor without a present, or a good fee in their hand. On entering, I found a man seated in the middle of the room, near an elevated wooden platform, upon which were piled boxes, books, and a variety of instruments and utensils, the uses of which were un- known to me. He was in dress and ap- pearance the most extraordinary looking infidel I had ever seen. His chin and upper lip were without the vestige of a hair upon them, as like an eunuch as pos- sible. He kept his head most disrespect- fully uncovered, and wore a tight bandage round his neck, with other contrivances on the sides of his cheeks, as if he were anxious to conceal some wound or disease. His clothes were fitted so tight to his body, and his outward coat in particular was cut off at such sharp angles, that it was evi- dent cloth was a scarce and dear com- modity in his country. The lov/er part of his dress was particularly improper, and 214 THE ADVENTUllES OF he kept his boots on in his room, without any consideration for the carpet he was treading upon, which struck me as a cus- tom subversive of all decorum. I found that he talked our language; for, as soon as he saw me, he asked me how I did, and then immediately remarked that it was a fine day, which was so self- evident a truth, that I immediately agreed to it. I then thought it necessary to make him some fine speeches, and flattered him to the best of my abilities, informing him of the great reputation he had abeady ac- quired in Persia ; that Locman was a fool when compared to one of his wisdom ; and that as for his contemporaries, the Persian physicians, they were not fit to handle his pestle for him. To all this he said no- thing. I then told him that the king him- self, having heard of the wonderful effects of his medicine upon the person of his grand vizier, had ordered his historian to insert the circumstance in the annals of the empire, as one of the most extraordinary IIAJJI BAB A. 21.) events of his reign, — that a considerable sensation had been produced in his ma- jesty's seraglio, for many of the ladies had immediately been taken ill, and were long- ing to make a trial of his skill, — that the king's favourite Georgian slave was, in fact, at this moment in great pain, — that I had been deputed by the chief eunuch, owing to a special order from his majesty, to procure medicine similar to that which the first minister had taken, — and I con- cluded my speech by requesting the doc- tor immediately to furnish me with some. He seemed to ponder over what I had told him; and, after reflecting a short time, said that it was not his custom to ad- minister medicine to his patients without first seeing them, for by so doing he would probably do more harm than good; but that if he found that the slave was in want of his aid, he should be very happy to at- tend her. I answered to this, that as to seeing the face of the Georgian slave, that was totally 2 AG THE ADVENTUllES OF out of the question, for no man ever was al- lowed that liberty in Persia, excepting her husband. In cases of extreme necessity, perhaps a doctor might be permitted to feel a woman's pulse, but then it must be done when a veil covers the hand. To which the Frank replied, ' In order to judge of my patient's case I must not only feel the pulse, but see the tongue also.' ' Looking at the tongue is totally new in Persia,' said I ; * and I am sure you could never be indulged with such a sight in the seraglio, without a special order from the king himself; an eunuch would rather cut out his own tongue first.' * Well, then,' said the doctor, ' recol- lect, that if I deliver my medicine to you, I do so without taking any responsibihty upon myself for its effects ; for if it does not cure it may perhaps kill.' When I had assured him that no harm or prejudice could possibly accrue to him, he opened a large chest, which appeared to HAJJI BABA. 217 be full of drugs, and taking therefrom the smallest quantity of a certain white powder, he mixed it up, with some bread, into the form of a pill, and putting it into paper gave it me, with proper directions how it should be administered. Seeing that he made no mystery of his knowledge, I be- gan to question him upon the nature and properties of this particular medicine, and upon his practice in general. He answered me without any reserve ; not like our Per- sian doctors, who only make a parade of fine words, and who adjust every ailment that comes before them to what they read in their Galen, their Hippocrates, and their Abou Avicenna. When I had learned all I could, I left him with great demonstrations of friend- ship and thankfulness, and immediately returned to Mirza Ahmak, who doubtless was waiting for me with great impatience. Having divested myself of my borrowed cloak and resumed my own dress, I ap- peared before him with a face made up 218 THE ADVENTUEES OF for the occasion, for I wished to make him bcHeve that the lettuce and cucumbers had done their duty. At every word I pre- tended to receive a violent twitch, and acted my part so true to life, that the stern and inflexible nature of Mirza Ahmak him- self was moved into somewhat like pity for me. * There ! there,' said I, as I entered his apartment, * in the name of Allah take your prize:' and then pretending to be bent double, I made the most horrid gri- maces, and uttered deep groans : * there ! I have followed your orders, and now throw myself upon your generosity.' He endeavoured to take the object of his search from me, but I kept it fast; and whilst I gave him to understand that I ex- pected prompt reward, I made indica- tions of an intention to swallow it, unless he actually gave me something in hand. So fearful was he of not being able to an- swer the king's interrogatories concerning the pill, so anxious to get it into his pes- HAJJI BAB A. 219 session, that he actually pressed a gold piece upon me. No lover could sue his mistress with more earnestness to grant him a favour than the doctor did me for my pill. I should very probably have con- tmued the deceit a little longer, and have endeavoured to extract another piece from him; but when I saw him preparing a dose of his own mixture to ease my pain, I thought it high time to finish, and pre- tending all of a sudden to have received relief, I gave up my prize. When once he had got possession, he looked at it with intense eagerness, and turned it over and over on his palm, without appearing one whit more advanced in his knowledge than before. At length, after permitting him fully to exhaust his con- jectures, I told him that the Frank doctor had made no secret in saying that it was composed ofjivch, or mercury. ' Mercury, indeed !' exclaimed Mirza Ahmak — ' just as if I did not know that. And so, because 220 THE ADVENTURES OF this infidel, this dog of an Isauvi *, chooses to poison us with mercury, I am to lose my reputation, and my prescriptions (such as his father never even saw in a dream) are to be turned into ridicule. Whoever heard of mercury as a medicine ? Mercury is cold, and lettuce and cucumber are cold also. You would not apply ice to dissolve ice? The ass does not knov,r the first ru- diments of his profession. No, Hajji, this will never do; we must not permit our beards to be laughed at in this manner.' He continued to inveigh for a considera- ble time against his rival ; and would, no doubt, have continued to do so much longer, but he was stopped by a message from the king, who ordered him to repair forthwith to his presence. In the greatest trepidation he immediately put himself into his court dress, exchanged his com- mon black lamb's skin cap for one wound * J.sauvi, a follower of Jesus. HAJJI BABA. 221 about Avith a shawl, huddled on his red cloth stockings, called for his horse, and, taking the pill with him, went off in great hurry, and full of the greatest apprehen- sion at what might be the result of the audience. i 222 THE ADVENTURES OF CHAPTER XXI. He describes the manner in which the Shah of Persia takes medicine. The doctor's visit to the king had taken place late in the evening ; and as soon as he returned from it he called for me. I found him apparently in great agitation, and full of anxiety. ' Hajji/ said he, when I appeared, ' come close to me;' and having sent every one else out of the room, he said in a whisper, ' this infidel doctor must be disposed of somehow or other. What do you think has happen- ed? The Shah has consulted him; he had him in private conference for an hour this morning, without my being ap- prised of it. His majesty sent for me to tell me its result ; and I perceive that the Frank has already gained great influence. HA J JI BAB A. 223 It seems that the king gave him the hi- story of his complaints — of his debihty, of his old asthma, and of his imperfect digestion, but talked in raptures of the wretch's sagacity and penetration; for merely by looking at the tongue and feel- ing the pulse before the infidel was told what was the state of the case, he asked whether his majesty * did not use the hot- baths very frequently ; whether, when he smoked, he did not immediately bring on a fit of coughing; and whether, in his food, he was not particularly addicted to pickles, sweetmeats, and rice swimming in butter ? The king has given him three days to consider his case, to consult his books, and to gather the opinions of the Frank sages on subjects so important to the state of Persia, and to compose such a medicine as will entirely restore and renovate his * This is the most approved form of speecli among well educated Persians, whenever any al- lusion to the mysteries of the harem is intended. 224 THE ADVEXTUEES OF constitution. The Centre of the Universe then asked my opinion, and requested me to speak boldly upon the natures and pro- perties of Franks in general, and of their medicines. I did not lose this opportunity of giving utterance to my sentiments ; so, after the usual preface to my speech, I said, ' that as to their natures, the Shah, in his profound wisdom, must know, that they were an unbelieving and an unclean race ; for that they treated our Prophet as a cheat, and eat pork and drank wine without any scruple ; that they were women in looks, and in manners bears ; that they ought to be held in the greatest suspicion, for their ultimate object (see what they had done in India) was to take kingdoms, and to make Shahs and Nabobs their humble servants. As to their medicines,' I exclaimed, ' Hea- ven preserve your majesty from them ! they are just as treacherous in their effects as the Franks are in their politics : — with v/hat we give to procure death, they pretend to work their cures. Their principal ingredient is HAJJI BAliA. 225 mercury (and here I produced my pill); and they use their instruments and knives so freely, that I have heard it said they will cut oft' a man's limbs to save his li%.' I then drew such a picture of the fatal ef- fects likely to proceed from the foreign prescription, that I made the Shah promise that he would not take it without using every precaution that his prudence and wisdom might suggest. To this he con- sented; and as soon as the Frank shall have sent in the medicine which he is pre- paring, I shall be summoned to another interview. Now, Hajji, added the doc- tor, * the Shah must not touch the in- fiders physic ; for if perchance it were to do good, I am a lost man. Who will ever consult ^Nlirza Ahmak again ? No, we must avert the occurrence of such an event, even if I were obliged to take all his drugs myself.' We parted with mutual promises of doing every thing in our power to thwart the infidel doctor; and three days after VOL. I. Q 22G THE ADVENTURKS OF Mirza Ahmak was again called before the king in order to inspect the promised or- donnance, and which consisted of a box of pills. He, of course, created all sorts of suspicions against their efficacy, threw out some dark hints about the danger of receiving any drug from the agent of a foreign power, and, finally, left the Shah in the determination of referring the case to his ministers. The next day, at the usual public audience, when the Shah was seated on his throne, and surrounded by his prime vizier, his lord high treasurer, his minister for the interior, his principal se- cretary of state, his lord chamberlain, his master of the horse, his principal master of the ceremonies, his doctor in chief, and many other of the great officers of his household, addressing himself to his grand vizier, he stated the negotiations which he had entered into with the foreign phy- sician, now resident at his court, for the restoration and the renovation of the royal person ; that at the first conference, the said HAJJI BABA. 227 foreign physician, after a due inspection of the royal person, had reported that there existed several symptoms of debility. That at the second, after assuring the Shah that he had for three whole days employed himself in consulting his books and re- cords, and gathering from them the opi- nions of his own country sages on the sub- ject, he had combined the properties of various drugs into one whole, which, if taken interiorly, would produce effects so wonderful, that no talisman could come in competition with it. His majesty then said, that he had called into his councils his Hakim bashi, or head physician, who, in his anxiety for the weal of the Persian monarchy, had deeply pondered over the ordonnances of the foreigner, and had set his face against them, owing to cer- tain doubts and apprehensions that had crept into his mind, which consisted, 1st, whether it were politic to deliver over the internal administration of the royal person to foreign regulations and ordonnances; q2 228 THE ADVENTURES OF and, 2d, whether, in the remedy pre-* scribed, there might not exist such latent and destructive effects, as would endanger, undermine, and, finally, overthrow that royal person and constitution, v/hich it was supposed to be intended to restore and renovate. ' Under these circumstances/ said the Centre of the Universe, raising his voice at the time, ' I have thought it ad- visable to pause before I proceeded in this business; and have resolved to lay the case before you, in order that you may, in your united wisdoms, frame such an opi- nion as may be fitting to be placed before the king : and in order that you may go into the subject with a complete know- ledge of the case, I have resolved, as a pre- paratory act, that each of you, in your own persons, shall partake of this medicine, in order that both you and I may judge 6T its various effects."* To this most gracious speech the grand vizier and all the courtiers made exclama- tions, * May the king live for ever ! May HAJJI BABA. 229 the royal shadow never be less ! We are happy not only to take physic, but to lay down our lives in your majesty's service ! We are your sacrifice, your slaves ! May God give the Shah health, and a victory over all his enemies T Upon which, the chief of the valets was ordered to bring the foreign physician's box of pills from the harem, and delivered it to the Shah in a golden salver. His majesty then ordered the Hakim bashi to approach, and deliver- ing the box to him, ordered him to go round to all present, beginning with the prime vizier, and then to every man according to his rank, administering to each a pill. This being done, the whole assembly took the prescribed gulp ; after which en- sued a general pause, during which the king looked carefully into each man's face ""to mark the first eflects of the medicine. When the wry faces had subsided, the conversation took a turn upon the affairs of Europe ; upon which his majesty asked a variety of questions, which were an- 230 THE ADVENTURES OF swered by the different persons present in the best manner they were able. The medicine now gradually began to show its effects. The lord high treasurer first, a large coarse man, who to this mo- ment had stood immovable, merely saying belli , belli, yes, yes, whenever his majesty opened his mouth to speak, now appeared uneasy, for what he had swallowed had brought into action a store of old com- plaints which were before lying dormant. The eyes of all had been directed towards him, which had much increased his per- turbed state ; when the chief secretary of state, a tall, thin, lathy man, turned deadly pale, and began to stream from every pore. He was followed by the minister for the interior, whose unhappy looks seemed to supplicate a permission from his majesty to quit his august presence. All the rest in succession were moved in various ways, except the prime vizier, a little old man, fa- mous for a hard and unyielding nature, and who appeared to be laughing in his sleeve IIAJ.II BABA. 231 at the misery which his compeers in office were undergoing. As soon as the Shah perceived that the medicine had taken effect, he dis- missed the assembly, ordering Mirza Ah- mak, as soon as he could ascertain the history of each pill, to give him an official report of the whole transaction, and then retired into his harem. The crafty old doctor had now his rival within his power ; of course, he set the matter in such a light before the king, that his majesty was deterred from making the experiment of the foreign physician's or- donnance, and it was forthwith consigned to oblivion. When he next saw me, and after he had made me acquainted with the preceding narrative, he could not restrain his joy and exultation. ' We have con- quered, friend Hajji,"' would he say to me. ' The infidel thought that we were fools ; but we will teach him what Persians are. Whose dog is he, that he should aspire to so high an honour as prescribing for a 232 THK ADVENTUilES OF king of kings ? No, that is left to such men as I. What do we care about his new dis- coveries ? As our fathers did, so are we contented to do. The prescription that cured our ancestors shall cure us; and what Locman and Abou Avicenna or- dained, we may be satisfied to ordain after them.' He then dismissed me, to make fresh plans for destroying any influence or credit that the new physician might ac- quire, and for preserving his own conse- quence and reputation at court. HAJJI BABA. 233 CHAPTER XXII. Hajji Baha asks the doctor for a salary, and of the success of his demand. I HAD thus far lived with the doctor more as a friend than as a servant ; for he permitted me to sit in his presence, to eat with him, and even to smoke his pipe, whilst at the same time I associated with his servants, eat, drank, and smoked with them also ; but I found that this sort of life in nowise suited my views and ex- pectations. The only money which I had received from him was the gold coin afore- mentioned, for which I was indebted to my own ingenuity ; and, as things went, it ap- peared that it would be the last. I was therefore resolved to come to an explana- tion with him, and accordingly seized the opportunity when he was elated with 234 THE ADVENTURES OF his success over the European doctor, to open the subject of my grievances. He had just returned from the imperial gate, after having seen the Shah; who, by his account, had been very gracious to him, having kept him standing without his shoes only two hours, by the side of a stone fountain, instead of six, which he generally does. ' What a good king he is !' he ex- claimed, ' how affable, how considerate ! It is impossible to say how much kindness he shows to me. He gave abuse to the Eu- ropean doctor, all out of compliment to my abilities, and said that he is not fit to hold my shoes. He then ordered his favourite running footman to bring me a present of two partridges, which were caught by the royal hawks.' I observed, ^ Yes, the king says true. Who is your equal now a-days in Persia ? Happy Shah ! to possess such a treasure. What are the Franks, that they should talk of medicine ? If they want learning, science, and skill, let them look to Mirza Ahmak.' HAJJI BABA. 235 Upon this, with a smile of self-com- placency, he took the pipe from his own mouth and gave it to me, pulled up his mustaches, and stroked his beard. ' Inshallah! may it please God,' I con- tinued to say, * that I also may share in the glory of your reputation ; but I am like a dog, I am nothing, I am not even like the piece of clay, which was scented by the company of the rose." * How V said the doctor ; ' why are you out of spirits V * I will leave you to judge, and relate a story,' said I. * Once upon a time there was a dog, who in looks and manners was so like a wolf, that the wolves used to ad- mit him into their society. He ate, drank, and killed sheep with them, and, in short, was every thing that a wolf ought to be ; at the same time, he lived with his fellow dogs like a dog, and was admitted to all their parties. But, little by little, the dogs perceived that he associated with wolves, and became shy of him ; and it also hap- pened that the wolves discovered that he 236 THE ADVENTUEES OF was in fact a dog, and did not like to admit him any longer into their circles ; so be- tween both, the poor dog became neglected and miserable ; and, unabb to bear his un- defined state any longer, he determined to make a decided effort to become either a dog or a wolf. I am that dog!' exclaimed I: ' you permit me to sit and smoke with you, who are so much my superior ; you talk to and consult me, and I am even admitted to the society of your friends ; but what does that benefit me ? I am still a servant, v^^ithout enjoying any of the advantages of one : I get nothing. I pray you therefore to appoint me to the situation you wish me to hold in your service, and to fix a salary upon me.' * A salary indeed P exclaimed the doc- tor : * I never give salaries. My servants get what they can from my patients, and you may do the same; they eat the remains of my dinner, and they receive a coat at the festival of the No Ruz — what can they want more V At this moment entered the Shah's running-footman, bearing in his HAJJI BABA. 237 hands a silver tray, upon which were placed the two partridges that his majesty had presented to the doctor, and which in great form he gave into his hands, who, rising from his seat, carried the tray to his head, and exclaimed, * May the king's kindness never be less ! — may his wealth increase, and may he live for ever !' He then was called upon to make the bearer a present. He sent first five piastres*, which the servant returned v/ith great indignation. He then sent one to- maun : this also was sent back, until at length in despair he sent five tomauns. which, it was intimated, was the sum pro- per to be given. This disagreeable cir- cumstance dissipated all the pleasure which such a present had produced, and the Hakim, in his rage, permitted himself to use such expressions, which, if reported to the king, would have brought him into considerable trouble. ^ A present, indeed V said he ; 'I wish such presents were in * A piastre is about two shillings. 238 THE ADVENTURES OF the other world! 'Tis thus we pay the wages of the king's servants — a set of ra- pacious rascals, without either shame or conscience ! And the worst of it is, we must pay them handsomely, or else when- ever it happens that I get the bastinado on the soles of my feet, which come it will, they, who perform the operation, will show me no mercy. Let me not forget what Saadi says, that you can no more depend upon the friendship of a king than you can upon the voice of a child ; because the former changes on the slightest suspicion, the latter in the course of a night.' Upon this reflection, the doctor began to be alarmed at what he had said at the outset of his speech ; and, with all the terrors of the Jeleh before him, he seemed quite reconciled to the loss of his five tomauns. I found that this would not be the best moment to resume the subject of my ex- pectations, and therefore reserved it for some future opportunity ; but I had heard HAJJI B.ABA. 1*3!) enough to settle in my own mind, that I would leave the Locman of the age when- ever an opportunity should offer, and for the present to content myself with being neither dog nor wolf. 240 THE ADVENTURES OF CHAPTER XXIII. He hecomes dissatisfied with his situation, is idle, and falls in love. Discontented with my present lot, and uncertain as to my future prospects, my days passed on in total idleness ; and, as I had no inclination to pursue the profession of physic, which many before me had done quite on as slender a foundation as the one I had acquired, I cared little for those pursuits which engaged Mirza Ahmak. I should very probably have left him in- stantly, if a circumstance had not occurred, arising from the very state of unprofitable- ness in v/hich I lived, which detained me in his house. The feelings to which it gave rise so entirely absorbed every other consideration, that I became their slave ; and so violent were the emotions v\hich they created, that I verily believe that IIAJJI EABA. 241 Maj noun, in the height of his phrensy, could not have been madder than I. After this, it is needless to mention that I was in love. The spring had passed over, and the first heats of summer, which now began to make themselves felt, had driven most of the inhabitants of the city to spread their beds and sleep on the house-tops. As I did not like to pass my night in com- pany of the servants, the carpet-spreaders and the cook, who generally herded to- gether in a room below, I extended my bed in a corner of the terrace, which overlooked the inner court of the doctor's house, in which were situated the apart- ments of the women. This court v/as a square, into which the windows of the different chambers looked, and was planted in the centre with rose-bushes, jessamines, and poplar-trees. A square wooden plat- form was erected in the middle, upon which mattresses were spread, where the inhabitants reposed during the great heats. I had seen several women seated VOL. I. R 242 THE AD VENT LEES OF in different parts of the court, but had never been particularly struck by the ap- pearance of any one of them ; and indeed had I been so, perhaps I should never have thought of looking at them again ; for as soon as I v/as discovered, shouts of abuse were levelled at me, and I was called by every odious name that they could devise. One night, hov/ever, soon after the sun had set, as I was preparing my bed, I per- chance looked over a part of the wall that was a little broken down, and on a slip of terrace that was close under it I discovered a female, who was employed in assorting and spreading out tobacco-leaves. Her blue veil was negligently thrown over her head, and as she stooped, the two long- tresses which flowed from her forehead hung down in so tantalizing a manner as nearly to screen all her face, but still left so much of it visible, that it created an in- tense desire in me to see the remainder. Every thing that I saw in her announced beauty. Her hands were small, and dyed IIAJJI BAB A. 213 with X'Jienna; her feet were equally small; and her -whole air and form bespoke love- liness and grace. I gazed upon her until I could no longer contain my passion; I made a shght noise, which immediately caused her to look up, and before she could cover herself with her veil, I had had time to see the most enchanting features that the imagination can conceive, and to re- ceive a look from eyes so bewitching, that I immediately felt my heart in a blaze. With apparent displeasure she covered herself; but still I could perceive that she had managed her veil with so much art, that there was room for a certain dark and sparkhng eye to look at me, and to enjoy my agitation. As I continued to gaze upon her, she at length said, though still going on with her work, ' Why do you look at me i It is criminal.' ' For the sake of the sainted Hosien,' I exclaimed, ' do not turn from me ; it is no crime to love : your eyes have made roast r2 244 THE ADVENTURES OF meat of my heart : by the mother that bore you, let me look upon your face again."" In a more subdued voice she answered me, * Why do you ask me ? You know it is a crime for a woman to let her face be seen ; and you are neither my father, my brother, nor my husband ; I do not even know who you are. Have you no shame, to talk thus to a maid V At this moment she let her veil fall, as if by chance, and I had time to look again upon her face, which was even more beau- tiful than I had imagined. Her eyes were large and peculiarly black, and fringed by long lashes, which, aided by the coliyrium with which they were tinged, formed a sort of ambuscade, from which she levelled her shafts. Her eyebrows were finely arched, and nature had brought them together just over her nose, in so strong a line, that there was no need of art to join them to- gether. Her nose was aquiline, her mouth small, and full of sweet expression ; and HAJJI 13 ABA. 24.') in the centre of lier chin was a dimple which she kept carefully marked with a blue puncture. Nothing could equal the beauty of her hair ; it was black as jet, and fell in long tresses down her back. In short, I was wrapped in amazement at her beauty. The sight of her explained to me many things which I had read in our poets, of cypress forms, tender fawns, and sugar- eating parrots. It seemed to me that I could gaze at her for ever, and not be tired ; but still I felt a great desire to leap over the wall and touch her. My passion was increasing, and I was on the point of approaching her, when I heard the name of Zeenab repeated several times, with great impatience, by a loud shrill voice; upon which my fair one left the terrace in haste, and I remained riveted to the place where I had first seen her. I continued there for a long time, in the hope that she might return, but to no purpose. I lent my ear to every noise, but nothing was to be heard below but the same angry voice, which, by 246 THE ADVENTURES OF turns, appeared to attack every thing, and every body, and which could belong to no one but the doctor's wife ; a lady, who, as report would have it, was none of the mildest of her sex, and who kept her good man in great subjection. The day had now entirely closed in, and 1 was about retiring to my bed in de- spair, when the voice was heard again, ex- claiming, *Zeenab, where are you going to ? Why do you not retire to bed V I indistinctly heard the ans^ver of my charmer, but soon guessed what it had been, when I saw her appear on the ter- race again. My heart beat violently, and I was about to leap over the wall, which separated us, when I was stopped by see- ing her taking up a basket, in which she had gathered her tobacco, and make a hasty retreat; but just as she was disap- pearing, she said to me, in a low tone of voice, * Be here to-morrow night.' These words thrilled through my whole frame, in a manner that I had never before HAJJI BABA. 247 felt, and I did not cease to repeat them, and ponder over them, until, through ex- haustion, I fell into a feverish doze, and I did not awaken on the following morning until the beams of the sun shone bright in my face. 248 THE ADVENTURES OF CHAPTER XXIV. He has an interview with the fair Zeenah, who relates how she passes her time in the doctor's harem. ' So,' said I, when I had well rubbed my eyes : * so, now I am in love ? Well ! we shall see what will come of it. Who and what she is we shall know to-night, so please it ; and if she is any thing which belongs to the doctor, may his house be ruined if I do not teach him how to keep a better watch over his property. As for marriage, that is out of the question. Who would give a wife to me ; , I who have not even enough to buy myself a pair of trowsers, much less to defray the ex- penses of a wedding ? Inshallah, please God, that will take place one of these days, whenever I shall have got together some money; but now I will make play with love, and let the doctor pay for it.' HAJJI BABA. '219 With that intention I forthwith got up and dressed myself; but it was with more cave than usual. I combed my curls a great deal more than ordinary ; I studied the tie of my girdle, and put my cap on one side. Then having rolled up my bed, and carried it into the servants' hall, I issued from home, with the intention of going to the bath, and making my person sweet, preparatory to my evening's assigna- tion. I went to the bath, where I passed a great part of my morning in singing, and spent the remainder of the time, until the hour of meeting, in rambling about the town without any precise object in view. At length the day drew towards its close, my impatience had reached its height, and I only waited for the termina- tion of the shd7n, or the evening's meal, to feign a head-ache, and to retire to rest. My ill luck would have it, that the doctor was detained longer than usual in his at- tendance upon the Shah, and as the ser- vants dined after him, and ate his leav- 250 THE ADVENTUllES OF ings, it was late before I was at liberty. When that moment arrived, I was in a fever of expectation : the last glimmering of day tinged the western sky with a light shade of red, and the moon v/as just rising, when I appeared on the terrace with my bed under my arm. I threw it down and unfolded it in haste, and then, with a beating heart, flew to the broken wall. I looked over it with great precaution ; but, to my utter disappointment, I saw nothing but the tobacco spread about in confused heaps, with baskets here and there, as if some work had been left unfinished. I looked all around, but saw no Zeenab. I coughed once or twice ; no answer. The only sound which reached my ears was the voice of the doctor's wife, exerting itself upon some one within the house, although its shrillness pierced even the walls ; yet I could not make out what was the cause of its being so excited, until of a sudden it burst into the open air with increasing violence. HAJJI BAB A. 251 * You talk of work to me, you daughter of the devil ! Who told you to go to the bath ? What business had you at the tombs ? I suppose I am to be your slave, and you are to take your pleasure. Why is not your work done ? You shall neither eat, drink, nor sleep, until it is done, so go to it immediately; and if you come away until it be finished, wallah.' hillah! by the prophet, I v/ill beat you till your nails drop off.' Upon this I heard some push- ing and scuffling, and immediately per- ceived my fair one proceeding with ap- parent reluctance to the spot, which not a moment before I had despaired of seeing blessed v.ith her presence. Oh what a V. onderful thing is love ! thought I to my- self: how it sharpens the wits, and how fertile it is in expedients ! I perceived at a glance how ingeniously my charmer had contrived every thing for our interview, and for a continuance of it without the fear of interruption. She saw, but took no notice of me until the storm below 252 THE ADVENTUHES OF had ceased; and then, when every thing had relapsed into silence, she came towards me, and, as the reader may well suppose, I was at her side in an instant. Ye, v/ho know what love is, may, perhaps, conceive our raptures, for they are not to be expressed. To use the idea of one our poets, * The waters of our existence, although spring- ing from different sources, met, and be- came united into one impetuous torrent, which rolled on, heedless of the destruc- tion it might occasion in its maddening course.' I learnt from my fair friend that she was the daughter of a Curdish chief, who, with his whole family, including his flocks and herds, had been made prisoner when she was quite a child ; and that, from cir- cumstances which she promised hereafter to relate to me, she had fallen into the hands of the doctor, whose slave she now was. After the first burst of the sentiments which we felt towards each other had sub- HAJJl BAB A. 253 sided, she gave way to the feelings of an- ger, which she felt for the treatment that she had just experienced. * Ah !' she ex- claimed, * did you hear what that woman called me ! woman, without faith, without religion ! 'Tis thus she always treats me ; she constantly gives me abuse ; I am be- come less than a dog. Every body rails at me ; no one comes near me ; my liver is become water, and my soul is withered up. Why should I be called a child of the devil? I am a Curd; I am a Yezeedi*. 'Tis true that we fear the devil, and who does not ? but I am no child of his. Oh ! that I could meet her in our mountains : she would then see what a Curdish girl can do.* I endeavoured to console her as well as I could, and persuaded her to smother her resentment until she could find a good op- portunity of revenging herself. She de- spaired at that ever coming to pass ; be- * The Yezeedis are a tribe of the Curds^ who are said to worship the devil. 2J4 THE ADVENTURES OF cause all her actions were so strictly watched, that she could scarcely go from one room to another v/ithout her mistress being aware of it. The fact was, so she informed me, that the doctor, who was a man of low family, had, by orders of the king, married one of his majesty's slaves, who, from some misconduct, had been ex- pelled the harem. She brought to the doctor no other dowry than an ill temper, and a great share of pride, which always kept her in mind of her former influence at court ; and she therefore holds her pre- sent husband as cheap as the dust under her feet, and keeps him in a most pitiful state of subjection. He dares not sit down before her, unless she permits him, which she very seldom does ; and she is moreover so jealous, that there is no slave in her ha- rem who does not excite her suspicions. The doctor, on the other hand, v/ho is very ambitious, and pleased with his exalta- tion, is also subject to the frailties of hu- man nature, and is by no means insensible HAJJI BABA. 255 to the charms of the fair creatures, his slaves. Zeeiiab herself, so she informed me, is the peculiar object of his attentions, and consequently that of the jealousy of his wife, who permits no look, word, or sign to pass unnoticed. Much intrigue and espionage is carried on in the harem ; and when the lady herself goes to the bath or the mosque, as many precautions are taken about the distribution of the female slaves, with respect to time, place, and opportunity, as there would be in the ar- rangement of a wedding. Having never seen more of the interior of an anderiin than what I recollected as a boy in niy own family, I became sur- prised, and my curiosity was greatly ex- cited in proportion as the fair Zeenab proceeded in her narrative of the history of her life in the doctor's house. * We are five in the harem, besides our mis- tress/ said she : * tliere is Shireen, tlie Georgian slave ; then Nur Jehan, the Ethiopian slave girl; Fatmeh, the cook; 25€ THE ADVENTURES OF and old Leilah, the duenna. My situation is that of hand-maid to the Jchanum, so my mistress is called: I attend her pipe, I hand her her coffee, bring in the meals, go with her to the bath, dress and undress her, make her clothes, spread, sift, and pound tobacco, and stand before her. Shireen, the Georgian, is the sanduMar, or housekeeper ; she has the care of the clothes of both my master and mistress, and indeed of the clothes of all the house ; she superintends the expenses, lays in the corn for the house, as well as all the other provisions; she takes charge of all the porcelain, the silver, and other ware ; and, in short, has the care of whatever is either precious or of consequence in the family. Nur Jehan, the black slave, acts asjerash^ or carpet-spreader : she does all the dirty work, spreads the carpets, sweeps the rooms, sprinkles the water over the court- yard, helps the cook, carries parcels and messages, and, in short, is at the call of every one. As for old Leilah, she is a HAJJI BAB A. 257 sort of duenna over the young slaves : she is employed in the out of door service, carries on any little affair that the khanum may have with other harems, and is also supposed to be a spy upon the actions of the doctor. Such as we are, our days are passed in peevish disputes ; whilst, at the same time, some two of us are usually leagued in strict friendship, to the ex- clusion of the others. At this present mo- ment I am at open war with the Georgian, who, some time ago, found that her good luck in life had forsaken her, and she in consequence contrived to procure a talis- man from a dervish. She had no sooner obtained it, than on the very next day the khanum presented her with a new jacket ; this so excited my jealousy, that I also made interest with the dervish to supply me with a talisman that should secure me a good husband. On that very same even- ing I saw you on the terrace. Conceive my happiness ! But this has established a rivaUty between myself and Shireen, VOL. I. S 2j8 the adve2^tures of which has ended m hatred, and we are now mortal enemies : perhaps we may as suddenly be friends again. I am now on the most intimate terms with Nur Jehan, and at my persuasion she reports to the khanum every story unfavourable to my rival. Some rare sweetmeats, with baJdava (sweet cake) made in the royal seraglio, were sent a few days ago from one of the Shah's ladies, as a present to our mistress ; the rats eat a great part of them, and we gave out that the Georgian was the culprit, for which she received blows on the feet, which Nur Jehan administered. I broke my mistress's favourite drinking-cup, Shi- reen incurred the blame, and was obliged to supply another. I know that she is plotting against me, for she is eternally closeted with Leilah, who is at present the confidant of our mistress. I take care not to eat or drink any thing which has passed through her hands to me, for fear of poison, and she returns me the same comphment. It is not, that our hatred IIAJJI BABA. 259 amounts to poison yet, but such precau- tions are constantly in use in all harems. We have as yet only once come to blows : she excited me to violent anger by spitting and saying, * lahnet he Sheitan, curse be on the devil, which you know to the Yezee- dies is a gross insult; when I fell upon her, calling her by every wicked name that I had learnt in Persian, and fasten- ing upon her hair, of which I pulled out whole tresses by the roots. We were parted by Leilah, who came in for her share of abuse, and we continued railing at each other until our throats were quite dried up with rage and exhaustion. Our violence has much abated since this con- flict ; but her enmity is undiminished, for she continues to show her spite against me in every manner she can devise.' Zeenab continued to entertain me in this manner until the first dawn of the morn- ing, and when we heard the muezzin call the morning prayers from the mosque, we thought it prudent to retire ; but not until 260 THE ADVENTURES OF we had made mutual promises of seeing each other as often as prudence would allow. We agreed, that whenever she had by her stratagems secured an oppor- tunity for meeting, she should hang her veil upon the bough of a tree in the court, which could be seen from my terrace ; and that if it were not there, I was to conclude that our interview on that night was im- possible. HAJJI BABA. 261 CHAPTER XXV. The lovers meet again, and are very happy. Hajji Baba sings. On the following evening, I ascended the terrace in the hope of seeing the signal of meeting; but in vain; no veil was visible; and I sat myself down in despair. The tobacco, and all the ap- paratus for cleaning it, had disappeared, and all w^as hushed below. Even the un- ceasing voice of the doctor's wife, which I now began to look upon as the most agree- able sound in nature, was wanting; and the occasional drag of a slipper, which I guessed might proceed from the crawl of old Leilah, was the only sign of an inhabitant. I had in succession watched the distant din of the king's band, the crash of the drums, and the swell of the trumpets, announcing sunset. I had listened to the various tones of the Muez- 2()2 THE ADVEXTUllES OF zins, announcing the evening prayer; as well as to the small drum of the police, ordering the people to shut their shops, and retire to their homes. The cry of the sentinels on the watch-towers of the king's palace was heard at distant inter- vals ; night had completely closed in upon nie, and still the same silence prevailed in the doctor's harem. * What can be the reason of this V said I to myself. ' If they have been to the bath, they cannot have remained thus late : besides, the baths are open for the women in the mornings only. Some one must be sick, or there is a marriage, or a birth, or perhaps a burial ; or the doctor may have received the bastinado ; in short, I was killing myself with conjecture, w^lien of a sudden a great beating at the door took place, and, as it opened, the clatter of slippers was heard, attended by the mingled sounds of many female voices, amongst which the well-known querulous tone of the khanum was prominent. Se- veral lanterns passed to and fro, which HAJJI BAKA. 203 showed mc the forms of the women, amongst whom, as they threw off their veils, I recognised that of my Zeenab. I determined to watch, in the hope that I might still be blessed with an interview; and, in fiict, it was not long before she ap- peared. She stole to me wdth great pre- caution, to say that circumstances w^ould prevent our meeting on this occasion, as she should not fail being missed ; but that, certainly, ere long, she would contrive to secure an interview. In few words, she informed me that her mistress had been called upon to attend her sister (one of the ladies in the Shah's seraglio), who being taken suddenly ill, had expired almost immediately (it w^as supposed by poison administered by a rival), and that she had taken all her women with her, in order to increase the clamour of lamentation which was always made on such occasions ; that they had been there since noon, rending the air with every proper exclamation, until they were all hoarse ; that her mis- tress had already torn her clothes, an 264 THE ADVENTURES OF etiquette which she had performed how- ever with great care, considering that she wore a favourite jacket, having permitted only one or two seams of it to be ripped open. As the burial would take place the next day, it was necessary that they should be at their post early in the morn- ing to continue the lamentations, a service for which she expected to receive a black handkerchief, and to eat sweetmeats. My fair one then left me, promising that she would do her utmost to secure a meeting on the following evening, and telling me not to forget the signal. On getting up the next morning, I was much surprised to see it already made, and to perceive Zeenab below, beckoning me to go to her. I did not hesitate im- mediately to descend from the terrace by the same small flight of steps which she used to ascend it, and then of a sudden I found myself in the very centre of the ha- rem. An involuntary tremor seized me, when I reflected that I was in a place into which no man with impunity is permitted HAJJI BAB A. 265 to enter ; but, fortified by the smiles and the unconstrained manner of my enchant- ress, I proceeded. ' Come, Hajji,' said she, * banish all fear ; no one is here but Zeenab, and, if our luck is good, we may have the whole day to ourselves.' * By what miracle,' exclaimed I, ' have you done this? Where is the khanum? where are the women ? and, if they are not here, how shall I escape the doctor?' ' Do not fear,' she repeated again ; * I have barred all the doors ; and should any one come, you will have time to escape before I open them : but there is no fear of that ; all the women are gone to the funeral; and as for Mirza Ahmak, my mistress has taken care to dispose of him in such a manner, now that I am left by myself, that he will not dare to come within a parasang of his own house. You must know then," said she, *for I see you are all astonishment, that our destinies are on the rise, and that it was a lucky hour when we first saw each other. Every 266 THE ADVENTURES OF thing plays into our hands. My rival, the Georgian, put it into the khanum's head, that Leilah, who is a professed weeper at burials, having learned the art, in all its branches, since a child, was a personage absolutely necessary on the present occa- sion, and that she ought to go in pre- ference to nie, who am a Curd, and can know but little of Persian customs: all this, of course, to deprive me of my black handkerchief, and other advantages. Ac- cordingly, I have been left at home ; and the whole party went off an hour ago to the house of the deceased. I pretended to be very angry, and opposed Leilah's taking my place with apparent warmth ; but, thank Heaven, here we are, and so let us make the most of our time.' Upon which she went into the kitchen to prepare a tray, containing a breakfast for me, whilst she left me to explore that which is hidden from all bachelors, namely, the interior of the harem. I first went into the apartments of thekha- num herself. It opened upon the garden HAJJI BABA. 2G7 by an immense sash-window, composed of stained glass ; and in the corner was the accustomed seat of the lady, marked by a thick felt carpet, folded double, and a large down cushion, covered with cloth of gold, with two tassels at the extremities, and veiled by a thin outer covering of muslin. Near this seat was a looking-glass, prettily painted, and a box containing all sorts of curiosities ; the surme (collyrium) for the eyes, with its small instrument for apply- ing it ; some Chinese rouge ; a pair of arm- lets, containing talismans ; a tou zoiilfeh, or an ornament to hitch into the hair, and hang on the forehead; a knife, scissars, and other things. A guitar and a tam- bourine lay close at hand. Her bed, rolled up in a distant corner, was enclosed in a large wrapper of blue and white cloth. Several pictures, without frames, were hung against the walls, and the shelf which occupied the top of the room was covered with different sorts of glasses, basins, &c. In a comer were seen several bottles of Shiraz wine, one of which, just 2G8 THE ADVENTURES OF stopped with a flower, appeared to have been used by the good lady that very morning ; most likely in order to keep up her spirits during the melancholy cere- mony she was about to attend. ' So/ said I to myself, ' the Prophet is not much heeded in this house. I shall know another time how to appreciate a sanctified and mortified look. Our doc- tor, who calls himself a stanch Mussul- man, I see makes up for his large potations of cold water and sherbet abroad, by his good stock of wine at home.' By the time I had satisfied my curiosity here, and had inspected the other rooms, which belonged to the servants, Zeenab had prepared our breakfast, which she placed before us in the khanum's room. We sat down next to each other, and re- posed upon the very cushion of which I have just given the description. Nothing could be more delicious than the meal which she had prepared : there was a dish of rice, white as snow, and near it a plate of roast meat, cut into small bits, wrapped HAJJI BABA. 269 up in a large flap of bread ; then a beauti- ful Ispahan melon, in long slices; some pears and apricots ; an omelette warmed from a preceding meal; cheese, onions, and leeks ; a basin of sour curds, and two different sorts of sherbet : added to this, we had some delicious sweetmeats, and a basin full of new honey. ' How, in the name of your mother,' exclaimed I, as I pulled up my whiskers, and surveyed the good things before me, ' how have you managed to collect all this so soon? This is a breakfast fit for the Shah; " Oh, as to that,' she replied, * do not trouble yourself, but fall to. My mistress ordered her breakfast to be prepared over- night, but on second thoughts this morn- ing she determined to make her meal at the house of the deceased, and has left me, as you see, but little to do. Come, let us eat and be merry."* Accordingly, we did honour to the break- fast, and left but little for those who might come after us. After we had washed our 270 THE ADVENTURES OF hands, we placed the wine before us, and having each broken the commandment by taking a cup, we congratukated ourselves upon being two of the happiest of human beings. Such was my delight, that taking up the guitar which was near me, and putting aside all apprehension for the present, and all care for the future, I tuned it to my voice, and sang the following ode of Hafiz, which I had learnt in my youth, when I used to chai'm my hearers in the bath. What bliss is like to whisp'ring love, Or dalliance in the bowers of spring ? Why then delay ray bliss t' improve ? Haste, haste, my love, the goblet bring. Each hour that joy and mirth bestow Call it treasure, count it gain ; Fool is the man v*rho seeks to know His pleasure will it end in pain ! The links which our existence bind Hang not by one weak thread alone ; Of man's distress why tease the mind ? Sufficient 'tis — we know our own. IIAJJI CAB A. 271 The double charms of love and wine Alike from one sweet source arise : Are we to blame, shall we repine, AMien unconstrain'd the passions rise ? If, innocent in heart and mind, I sin unconscious of offence, A\'hat use, O casuist, shall I find In absolution's recompense? Hermits the flowing spring approve; Poets the sparkling bowl enjoy: And, till he 's judged by powers above, Hafiz will drink, and sing, and toy. Zeenab was quite in ecstasy: she had never heard any thing so deHghtful in her Hfe, and forgetting that both of us were but wretched individuals, — she a slave, I the most destitute of beings, — we did and felt as if all that surrounded us was our own, and that the wine and our love would last for ever. Having sang several more songs, and emptied several cups of wine, I found that my poetry was exhausted as well as our bottle. It was still quite early, and we had much 272 THE ADVENTUllES OF HAJJI BAB A. time before us, * Zeenab,"* said T, * you have long promised to tell me the history of your life, and now is a good opportunity ; we are not likely to be interrupted for a long while, and, as our meetings at night are very uncertain, an hour cannot be better filled up than by the recital of your adventures.' She assented to my proposal with much good-humour, and began as follows. END OF VOL. I. LONDON : PRINTED BY THOMAS DAVISON, WHITEFRIARS. UNIVERSITY OF ILLINOIS-URBANA